All characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi and
Marvel Comics
Special thanks to DB Sommer for
pre-reading.
The Silver Saotome
Chapter 2: The Id, the Super Ego and the Kuno
Ego
The robot rushed through the
corridors of the mammoth spaceship. It
zoomed through the halls, passing by several
other automotons that
were busily working on fixing the ship. It came
to a halt when it reached
a closed door at the end of one of the halls.
The door opened and allowed the
robot to enter the room. It was greeted with the sight of its
master sitting
in a chair in the center of the room, shrouded in
darkness.
"What news do you have
for me?" the figure in the chair stated in a voice
that chilled the robot's mechanical
soul.
The robot scratched its head
and tried to smile. Which was impossible seeing
as how it had no mouth. The robot
said,"Master, it seems that we are in Alpha
Centauri now, and the Silver Saotome is on the
planet Katar."
"So, what is the
problem?"
The robot laughed and said
quietly,"Katar is three billion miles from Alpha
Centauri."
The figure sitting in the
chair made absolutely no movement than said,"Fine. It is but a minor set
back."
The robot was leaving as the
figure asked,"Why are you shaking so, automoton?"
"Well, master you are
the one who created us robots to have human emotions."
A set of glistening
white teeth came through in the darkness in a demonic
smile,"And you know why I did
that?"
The robot shook to the point
where it almost came to pieces and said,"Why?"
"So, I could see the
reaction I get from you when I do this," and he thrust his hand forward and
a blast of cosmic energy came from it destroying the robot.
"Some, would shoot the
messenger while I would obliterate the messenger."
The figure stood up from his chair and clenched his hand into
a fist in front of his face.
"Just, you wait Ranma Saotome. Just
you wait."
---
"WAIT UP, RANMA!"
The white streak of light
pulled to a halt over a large body of water and a yellow
streak of light stopped a
few feet behind. Ranma stood on his board and Akanova hovered in the air as she
spoke,"Why do you have to go so fast all the time?"
Ranma turned his face to the
sky and said,"I am the Silver Saotome and I am
the fastest being in the
universe. Is it my fault that I'm not as slow as you?"
"Shut up you peeping tom!"
Ranma groaned and
said,"You were the one who walked in on me! And I don't see why it's such a
big deal! I mean I'm much better built in my girl form
anyway."
Akanova was about to retort
with a blast of energy when Ranma said,"And why do I have to wear these
clothes? I feel like a moron!"
He fingered the dark blue
school uniform he was wearing.
She said,"You have to
wear clothes!"
He said,"Why? I never
get cold and my genitals aren't visible at all."
"Because... Well... It's
just not right."
"A master of the
psychology of argument I presume?"
"Oh, Shut up you
perverted-" Akanova stopped and looked away from Ranma. He scratched his
head as Akanova continued to stare off into space.
"Oh, not again."
she groaned to herself.
"What's the
problem?" Ranma asked.
"It's none of your
business!" she yelled back at him."If you don't want to get hurt stay
out of my way!"
With that Akanova flew off back in the direction of
her home. Ranma stared at the spot that she had occupied and decided that it was
worth investigating. He zoomed after her on his board wondering what had upset
her so much.
---
The
Stranger stood on his lawn looking up into the sky. Goddess walked up next to
the cosmic being and said,"What are you looking at,
father?"
"A creature who can
control the very elements of this planet is approaching us."
Goddess said,"Oh, I'll
have to make dinner for another guest."
A black speck could be seen
high in the sky. As it grew closer to the earth it cast a shadow over the The
Stranger and his lawn. As it grew nearer and nearer, Akanova flew onto the scene
and Ranma came to a stop next to her.
She turned to Ranma and
said,"I told you to stay out of my way!"
"Oh, please! If anyone
is gonna get hurt it's you! You're weaker than an Ovoid!"
Nabula walked out of the
house onto the lawn and said,"Hey, guys! Isn't there something else you
should be paying attention to?"
Akanova and Ranma turned
their attentions back to the 'it'. It was a humongous grey and brown sphere. On
the sphere a face could be seen, which had eyes that sparkled with energy and a
mouth which thundered out in a mighty tone,"I AM KUNO EGO, THE LIVING MOON!
YOU MUST GIVE ME WHAT I NEED!"
Akanova shouted,"Kuno!
This is the tenth time you've made me late for school this
month!"
"KUNO EGO HAS NO CONCERN
FOR SUCH THINGS! I HAVE TRAVELED MILLIONS OF MILES IN SEARCH OF THAT WHICH I
NEED!" the living moon bellowed out.
Ranma asked,"Well, what
do you need?"
Kuno Ego said,"I NEED TO
DATE AKANOVA!"
Ranma
facefaulted.
"NOW, AWAY FROM ME MORTALS, SO THAT KUNO EGO SHOULD DO BATTLE WITH
AKANOVA!"
Nabula said,"Hey, we're
not all mortals. I bet Mr.Genmacticus could take you on..." She looked over
across the yard at the sleeping form of a gigantic panda."Then
again."
Ranma said,"Hey, Mr. The
Stranger why don't you fight this guy?"
The Stranger said,"I
cannot."
"Why?" Ranma
asked.
The Stranger, Akanova, Nabula
and Godess said simultaneously,"I am/ he is The Stranger and my/ his
motives must remain a mystery."
Akanova shouted,"Anyway
this is my fight Ranma! I don't need anyone to fight for me!"
"ENOUGH TALK! I HAVE AN
APPOINTMENT WITH MY ACCOUNTANT TODAY!" Ego Kuno blasted out.
Akanova shouted,"Oh, so
it's okay if you wreck my schedule, but we can't mess with the great Ego
Kuno's?!"
"KUNO EGO IS ABOVE
CARING ABOUT ANYTHING, BUT KUNO EGO! NOW HAVE WE FINISHED THE
HISTRIONICS?!"
"Not
quite!" Ranma raised his fist in
the air and said,"Kuno Ego! I challenge you to a fight!"
Kuno Ego looked at Ranma and
said,"VERY WELL! THE PRIZE FOR THE VICTOR SHALL BE
AKANOVA!"
"What?!" Akanova
screeched out.
Ranma said,"Okay!"
"Don't I get a say in
any of this?!" Akanova yelled, but was of course, ignored.
"Let's take this where
nobody else will get hurt," Ranma said.
"FINE!"
Ego Kuno and Ranma flew away
from the scene as Akanova shouted,"Ranma, stop! There's something I've
gotta tell you about Ego Kuno!"
Goddess said,"Oh. my! I
guess this means we're going to have some left-overs after
dinner."
Genmacticus immediately sat
up and The Stranger said,"Guess again."
---
"This looks good
enough," Ranma said before stopping his board. He looked back to see Ego
Kuno. The land Ranma had chosen for the fight was a desert that stretched out as
far as the eye could see. Ego Kuno floated in the air and remained as still as
possible.
"Do you want to start
the fight or what?" Ranma asked impatiently.
"I ALREADY AM STARTING
THE FIGHT!"
Ranma noticed that it was
getting awfully dark and looked behind him to see a tidal wave of sand crashing
down on him. Calling forth the Power Cosmic Ranma blasted the center of
the tidal wave. The blast, however, only divided it into two waves, which
slammed into him, knocking him off his board and thirty feet into a sand
dune.
As he got up, Ranma said,"Sand isn't supposed to
hurt that much."
"IT DOES WHEN YOU HAVE
TOTAL CONTROL OVER THE GRAVITY OF THE PLANET! YOU CAN MAKE A GRAIN OF SALT CARRY
THE MASS OF A WHALE!"
Ranma's board flew over to
him and he said,"You sure like to talk a lot."
"I LIKE TO MAKE MY
OPPONENTS AWARE OF THEIR IMMINENT DESTRUCTION! NOW YOU SHALL FEEL MY FULL
WRATH!"
"Whatever-Uggggh!" Ranma couldn't finish the
sentence as he felt a huge weight forced on his shoulders sending him down on
his hands and knees. Looking above himself Ranma saw that there was nothing
visible pressing down on his back.
"WITH MY CONTROL OVER
THE PLANET'S GRAVITY I CAN LITERALLY PUT THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD ON YOUR
SHOULDERS!"
Straining himself, Ranma
lifted his body ever so slowly from the ground. His every metallic muscle
screamed at the pressure, but he finally stood on straight up. Kuno Ego was so
surprised that he did not dodge in time when Ranma sent a bolt of cosmic energy
right towards his eye.
"ARRRGGH!" Kuno screamed and then felt a
volley of hundreds of bolts of cosmic energy smashing into his rocky surface.
Ranma kept up the assault hoping to weaken Kuno Ego until a huge black rock
surged from the ground
and blocked all of the blasts he
threw.
"HA! KEEP THROWING YOUR
BLASTS ALL YOU WANT! THEY WILL DO NOTHING AGAINST THIS ADAMANTIUM I HAVE CALLED
FORTH!" Kuno Ego boasted triumphantly.
Not believing him Ranma
continued to throw bolts of cosmic energy towards Kuno Ego. All of which were
effectively blocked by the huge chunk of Adamantium.
"FOR MY NEXT ATTACK KUNO
EGO WILL DROWN YOU IN AN ENTIRE OCEAN!"
Just then a humongous wave of
water came down from the sky and engulfed Ranma. Waiting and smiling, Kuno Ego
watched as the water enveloped the silver coated being.
After a few minutes Kuno Ego
said,"SURELY THE INSOLENT CUR IS DEAD NOW!"
With a thought the water
returned to its former place and Kuno Ego was surprised with what he saw.
Instead of seeing a dead silver coated man he saw a living silver coated
woman.
"WHAT BEAUTITUOUS MAIDEN
STANDS BEFORE KUNO EGO?!" asked the moon.
"Oh, shut up and
fight!" Ranma shouted.
"AND SO BOLD!" Kuno
Ego boomed,"KUNO EGO NEEDS TO DATE YOU!"
Ranma stepped back and
said,"Wait a second..."
"KUNO EGO WILL COME TO
YOU MAIDEN!" shouting this Kuno Ego flew towards Ranma.
Yelping Ranma managed to jump
on her board and fly out of the moon's path before it ran into her. Ranma
thought to himself <It will take me forever to beat this guy!
Unless...>
"Oh,
Kuno Ego!" Ranma said in a coy voice.
"YES! TELL KUNO EGO YOU WILL DATE WITH KUNO EGO!"
"That sentence made a
lot of sense," Ranma said quietly then more loudly,"Oh, I can only
date someone who beats me in combat!"
"OF COURSE! THAT MAKES
PERFECT SENSE! LET US DO BATTLE RIGHT NOW!"
"Oh, we can't fight
here!" Ranma said.
"WHERE THEN?!" Kuno
Ego questioned.
"Follow me," Ranma
said and with that he flew on his board into the sky with Kuno Ego close behind.
"MAIDEN ARE WE THERE
YET?!"
When they were well into
outer space Ranma said,"Yep. Let's fight!"
"VERY WELL!" Kuno
Ego tried to call forth a...
"WHAT?! KUNO EGO CAN'T
USE HIS POWERS!" Kuno Ego yelled.
Ranma grinned and
said,"Of course not. Your powers only relate to the planet you are on.
We're in space now so..."
"KUNO EGO IS
POWERLESS," the moon finished.
Ranma pulled back a
cosmically charged fist and said,"Say goodnight Kuno
Ego."
"GOODNIGHT KUNO
EGO."
POW!
---
Akanova tapped her foot lightly and saw a battered and bruised
female Ranma flying towards her.
"How did it go?" Akanova said.
Ranma said,"I won of
course. It was hard, but I managed to beat him when I-"
"Tricked him into going
into outer space where his powers are useless?" Akanova asked.
Blinking
Ranma said,"Yeah, how'd you know?"
"That's what I do every time I fight him," Akanova stated
flatly.
"Oh... Well, I guess you
could have handled that by yourself."
Akanova said,"Yes, I
guess I could have."
"There is one thing
about Kuno Ego that I don't get,"Ranma said.
"What's that?"
Akanova asked.
"I don't see why he
would need to date a tomboy like you."
Before she got the chance to
punch Ranma a huge white light flashed blinding the both of them. Standing in
front of the pair was a thirty foot tall bald woman wearing blue and white
robes.
Blinking Ranma
asked,"Wh-who are you?"
The bald woman looked down at
Ranma and Akane and said "I am Ukyo the Watcher and I have come for
Genmacticus."
Ryoucilo
Until I find better things
to write about. Ja ne.