(see previous posts for disclaimer)

TENCHI MUYO! RYO-OHKI +1
Ryoko Ressurected / The Protector Awakens
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CHAPTER 3
Revenge Upon the Rooftop
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"Hey, Tenchi! Whatcha got there?"

Tenchi looked up to see Amagasaki's large form hovering over him.
"Oh, nothing. Just a piece of junk."

Amagasaki's eyes dropped in disappointment. "Oh." His overweight form
slump. "So," he asked with the joviality of a class clown. His hair
was cut in a much shorter version of Tenchi's own cut and did not look
particularly appealing around his fat face. He wore nerdy glass which
took another several points off his appearance. To top it all off, he
had an oversized nose which was bright red and stuck out in a most
unflattering manner. His looks could be described as comical. He knew
he looked like a clown. But instead of despairing of it, and correcting
it, he accepted the role. "how was your summer vacation?"

"Oh, same as usual." Tenchi replied. "Just me and grampa up at the
Shrine all summer."

"Oh." The portly pupil laughed. "Didn't you get to meet any girls
even?" It was a subject on which he loved to tease Tenchi.

"If you were a girl, would you come to a shabby shrine deep in the
mountains?"

"No." Amagasaki admitted.

"Right. Plenty of girls. All eighty two years old." Tenchi laughted.

Amagasaki joined in. "Ah! So you dated mummies all summer longer?"

Tenchi suddenly stopped laughing. He remembered the cave, the mummy.
He recalled how it had seemed the thing was going to kiss him.

"Tenchi? What's wrong?"

Tenchi shook himself back to reality.

"Tenchi!" Amagasaki's voice sounded amused and shocked. "Don't tell me
you were so hard up you slept with a mummy?"

Tenchi punched the class clown hard enough to send him flying into the
lockers. "Grow up, will ya?" He griped. He walked out, leaving a crowd
of stunned students staring at Amagasaki, who was now sporting a
broken nose.

Tenchi walked up onto the roof, making sure the door was unlocked
first. He sat there, thinking back on the events in the cave. "I've got
to get a grip." He told himself. "Grampa never mentioned anything.
Maybe nothing happened after all." He wondered if this were true. Had
he just fallen asleep at the cave and dreamed about going in? He closed
his eyes and thought about it for a bit. His mind took him back to that
incident once again. It had to have been a dream. He opened his eyes,
planning to head back to class, apologize for losing his temper, and
resume classes.

But it was dark and the stars were already out.

"Oh great. I fell asleep. Missed all my classes and everyone's gone."

He heard a soft meow and turned to see the stray cat from his
grandfather's Shrine sitting there.

"Kitty?! How the heck did you get in here?" He reached to catch the
cat as it ran to him. But in mid-leap the cat vanished. "Huh?"

A girl's laugh came from behind him. Tenchi spun to find a rather
strange looking but not unattractive girl sitting on the edge of the
exhaust tower housing.

The girl jingled the little bell she was holding, then tossed it and
the ribbon it was tied to to Tenchi.

Tenchi caught it and studied it with a puzzled expression on his face.

"Ryoko." The girl's voice had an ethereal quality as mischievous as it
was mysterious. "That's my name." Her eyes flashed, like...

"No! No way!" Tenchi shook his head. Just his luck. Finally he'd met a
girl without the others around to tease him and spoil it and she
turned out to be.... "You can't be... you can't be that ... that
freeze-dried demon!"

More balls of light surrounded him, flashing at him, hurting his eyes
and causing him pain that no worse than mosquito stings.

"It was cold in there." She said, by way of acknowledgement. "And
dark. Do you know how long I was trapped in that cave? Seven hundred
years. And I didn't like it. I didn't like it at all."

All the balls of light flew to her hand, forming into something far
less harmless.

A light-staff!

"All I want now is REVENGE!" She told him.

"Hey!" Tenchi protested. "It's not my fault!"

"No?" She sounded amused.

"No! No way! It was my ancestor. Some guy named..." Tenchi faltered
for a split second. "...Yosho."

"I don't care." The she-demon replied, as she rose into the air, ready
to attack. "I just need to let my anger out on you RIGHT NOW!" She
brought herself and her weapon down at him.

Tenchi ducked just in time. "Why me?" He wondered, as he took off
running. The demoness floated effortlessly alongside him as he ran.

"You're going to have to run a lot faster than that, Earthling." she
laughed.

Earthling? Tenchi wondered. Maybe she wasn't a demon. Maybe she was an
alien! Well, whatever she was, she was sure scaring the heck out of
him! He normally didn't like following suggestions given to him by
ancient demons, but this one was particularly good.

He ran faster. A blast sent him flying back into the supply shed. The
shed splintered into pieces as his body struck it. He felt the pain of
impact, but surprisingly no bones broke. Looking down, he saw a
stone-headed sledge hammer. A rather pathetic looking weapon. But he
had no choice. Gripping the handle, he swung it at his foe with all his
might.

She simply held her hand up and caught it as if it were a baseball
tossed to her. She smiled amusedly as she let it go. She summoned him
with a beckoning finger.

"Huh?" Tenchi gritted his teeth and charged at her, again, swinging
the hammer rapidly. When he stopped and caught his breath, he saw her
standing there, laughing at him. He started to swing the hammer. It
fell to his feet in about seven pieces.

***

The batlike creature hummed quietly as he rinsed the shampoo from his
hair and fur. His hair was quite long now and he wore it in a ponytail
to keep it out of his face. However, since the hair around his face was
not quite long enough to make it into the ponytail's binding, he
totally failed to do this. He stepped out of the shower and grabbed a
towel from the rack.

As he dried himself off, he felt a sense of gratitude to the woman
scientist who had raised him. She had been the one who had designed
the escape pod with a shower. What genius! It was a minor detail, but
one that had been overlooked by most others. They all had this idea
that if they ever had to use an escape pod, they'd be rescued on the
first day. 

Once he was fully dried, a task which took him a little more time 
because of his fur, he put his clothes on. The outfit the scientist
had made for him looked rather odd. The pants were made of a blue
material of unbelievable sturdiness. He put them on. They felt pretty 
good in many places. Except one. Well, there wasn't anything he could 
do about that, short of walking around naked. A thought he didn't find 
very appealing. The shirt was a better fit, since the rest of his 
anatomy was pretty humanoid, except his ears, face, and fur.

"Computer? Can you bring up transmissions from Earth? I'd like to study 
the local language and customs before my arrival."

The computer scanned and locked on Japanese TV station. 

The alien made himself a fresh cup of coffee and sat down to watch.

***

Back on Earth, Tenchi Masaki was once again running for his life. He 
ran toward the stairwell. Another blast sent him tumbling down the 
steps, leaving the stairwell in ruins and a gaping hole in the roof.

"Hey!" Ryoko called to him. "Try not to hurt yourself. I'd like to do 
that for you!"

Tenchi ducked around a corner, hiding in a niche in the wall. The 
demoness drew nearer. But as she passed a mirror, she suddenly came to 
a screeching halt. 

She looked toward the mirror, admiring herself, then gasped in horror. 
"Oh! Look at me! My hair is a mess!" She preened herself, brushing the 
dirt from her clothes and fixing her hair.


"Thank god!" Tenchi looked around, then found an open classroom. He 
ducked inside just in time. He sat, wide-eyed, by the door, hiding. 
"I'll just hide here until I can think of a plan. Okay, so she's got 
incredible super powers and I don't. So far so good. I... what's that 
smell?" At first he was alarmed a little. Then he realized that the 
odor was not alien and its familiarity was a relief. "Oh, its just gas 
fume." His horror was renewed and increased by the significance of this 
fact. "Gas fumes?! I've got an idea! I'm going to get out of here!" He 
started to sneak off.

"Tenchi."

The girl's voice. But where was she. He looked around at the still 
demon-less classroom.

"Tenchi." It came again. This time he saw her, emerging from the wall.

She waved at him, a cheerful expression on her face. "Hello, there." 
She formed her light-staff again as she completed her journey through 
the wall. "It's time for today's lesson, schoolboy."

Tenchi pointed at the broken pipe in alarm. "There's leaking gas! 
You'll start a fire!"

"Gas?!" Ryoko gasped. She blinked. "What's gas?"

Tenchi suddenly realized that when Ryoko had last walked the earth, gas 
hadn't existed. At least not in this particular state. She didn't know 
what he was talking about. "I can just see the headlines," he muttered. 
"Brilliant student blown to bits. If I'd known I was going to die 
today, I wouldn't have done all that homework over summer vacation!" 

His life flashed before his eyes. One scene stood out. Not one he 
expected to. It was of him when he'd come to school for the first time. 
The class bully had pointed and said something cool was out the window 
and then, when Tenchi had looked, he'd yanked Tenchi's pants down, 
eliciting a laugh from the rest of the class. He wasn't sure why he had 
recalled this particular event, but it gave him idea. "I've got an 
idea." He told himself. He pointed out the window. "Hey! What's that 
outside the window!" He faltered as he realized just how stupid this 
strategy was. "I just used the oldest trick in the book." He told 
himself morosely.

As luck would have it, he had just used it on the oldest girl in the 
book. She rushed eagerly to the window. "Ooh! What is it?" She gasped. 
"I want to see!"

"I can't believe she bought it," he told himself as he left the class 
room. "I'm getting out of here." He slipped out quietly while she 
looked around and tried to work out just what was so interesting.

"Well, I don't see..." She suddenly realized she had been tricked. 
"I'll get him!" The sparks from her sword struck the gas leaking from 
the pipe. The result was a very large explosion that engulfed the 
classroom in flames and sent Tenchi flying down the hall.

"There she goes." Tenchi felt surprisingly sad at the idea that the 
ancient demon was now dead. "She was kind of cute." He admitted to 
himself. He clapped his hands together, started to pray, then caught 
himself. "Old Shrine habit." He laughed to no one. Then, through the 
smoke and flames he saw her approaching him. "I don't believe it!  
She's alive again!" he took off again.

She paused to cough the smoke from her lungs, an angry look on her 
face. "Hey!" She sounded as mad as she looked. "That's no way to treat 
a lady!"

Tenchi ran into his home room. He was collecting his books and his book 
bag when an alarm sounded. He was startled at first, then recognized 
it. "Oh, it's just the stupid fire alarm. Of course," he realized, 
"half the building's got to be on fire before it'll ring. Oh well, I 
guess its just one of those days." He was about to give in when the red 
circle beneath the alarm brought a recent memory to him. Each time 
Ryoko had attacked, the gem on her wrist had glowed. "Wait a minute." 
He gasped, surprised that he hadn't realized it sooner. "That jewel on 
her wrist. That's got to be the source of her powers. Yes, the legend 
says so. Three gems for power. If I can take it from her, maybe... I 
can get her back in that cave." He forgot entirely about the cave in 
question being back at his grandfather's Shrine. "I've got to try." He 
suddenly blurted out. "I can beat her! It's easy!"

"Easy?" She asked from just outside. She knocked the wall down and 
drifted in. 

Tenchi ran out into the yard. 

"Don't be so scared." Ryoko told him. "I won't hurt you too much!" She 
rose up and flew down at him with her light-staff raised to strike. 

Tenchi held his book bag up to block her. It was a move even more 
pathetic than going after her with a hammer. A move that never 
should've worked.

But it did!

To Tenchi's surprise, the bag glowed with brilliant light and split in 
two as the sword hilt within broke free of its prison. 

No... not a sword hilt. A sword. One made of pure light and energy. 
Tenchi reached up without thinking as the sword drifted into his hand. 
Instantly he blocked Ryoko's light-staff.

"Hey! No fair cheating!" She protested. 

Tenchi found himself counter-attacking. His moves were being 
choreographed by this incredible weapon he had once thought was only 
old junk. "Give me a break! This sword as a mind of its own! If I had 
my way I wouldn't fight a monster like you!" Apparently his tongue also 
had a mind of its own and his face took on a look of embarrassed horror 
as she glared at him.

"Monster?!" She was really ticked off now. "What makes you call a 
pretty young lady like me a MONSTER?!"

"Hey! Come on now." Tenchi continued to fight using the sword. Or 
rather the sword continued to fight using Tenchi. "You walk through 
fire. You walk through walls. You rip holes in the roof. And you can 
even fly!"

"Very good reasons. But not good enough!" She stepped on a rake as she 
walked forward. For a moment, Tenchi thought that it would hit her and 
knock her out cold, like in old slapstick movies. But she saw it coming 
and knocked it aside. So much for that. The sword arced to behead her. 
She leaned back to avoid it. As the sword finished its stroke, her hand 
crossed its path. The blade cut through her wrist, severing her hand, 
wrist, and gem from her body.  

The gem hit the ground, exploded feebly, and vanished, leaving the now 
weakened girl standing there, defeatedly.

Tenchi emitted a sigh of relief when he saw he hadn't cut her head off. 
He didn't think he could ever bring himself to actually kill anyone. 
Not even a demon. And he would've felt badly if he had.

"Oh well." Ryoko sighed. "Another battle lost. That's the story of my 
life. I," She started to lean her face on her hand, then noticed the 
hand was mission. "Hm?" She stared at it.

"The sword did it!" Tenchi gasped in horror, now feeling suddenly sorry 
for her. "I didn't mean to... cut of your... " he bowed his head. "I'm 
sorry."

She laughed, waving her other hand before the place her severed hand 
had been, like a stage magician making a card appear. A new hand 
appeared where the old one had been. 

Tenchi applauded the trick, relieved that he had not permanently 
injured her. 

She bowed. "Good night." She said as she sank into the earth.

Tenchi bowed in reply. Then was sent flying forward by an explosion 
that threw him off balance. Turning, he saw the school in flames. "I'd 
better get out of here before I get into real trouble."

***

The alien was laughing. On the screen was a program, Japan's Funniest
Home Videos, which showed a well-rounded menu of events in 
real Japanese homes. Like its similarly named American counterpart, 
of which the alien knew nothing, it's videos all followed the common 
themes of embarrassing mishaps and amusing surprises. 

It was probably atypical in regards to behavior. But it gave him the 
chance to hear how the casual Japanese speaker talked.

He poured himself some fresh coffee and got his dinner during the next 
commercial break. "That must be what they're for." He said, meaning the 
commercials. "What other possible use could they have?" Returning, he 
was treated to a scene so shockingly amusing that he almost spilled his 
drink. He set it down on the table extension on the chair and sat down 
to continue watching.

***

Tenchi walked into his bedroom and took a deep breath. "Whew! Home."  
He studied the now dormant sword in his hand. "This sword sure is 
powerful. I wonder what happened to that demon girl." He sighed in 
regret. If they'd met some other way. Maybe... "Never mind." He told 
himself as he sat on the bed. "It's over." He tapped down the lump in 
the bed. But it didn't go down. With a nervous gulp, he pulled the 
bedcovers back, revealing the she-demon now sleeping peacefully in his 
bed. Her top was opened just enough to give him a rather generous view 
of her cleavage and he felt sure that if she moved just right, he'd see 
a lot more. She rolled onto her back. Tenchi staggered back. To his 
relief, her breasts stayed inside her top. 

Ryoko opened her eyes and smiled up at him. "Welcome home, Tenchi." She 
greeted him.

Tenchi bowed his head, groaned, and prayed in quiet resignation.

=================The End of Episode One=========================