Hi. This is my first fic. It probably isn�t very good but give me a
little credit. I will try to recreate Takahashi-samas humor but I give
no guarantee. This idea has been used and I�d like to thank whoever came
up with it first. Also, these characters aren�t mine and I claim no
custody of them. Places as well. Anyway, here goes nothing. Being the
first post Ive ever made I would appreciate some criticism.  Brandon
Wallace (Selonian)

{Chinese} [Panda] <thought> (my notes)

A Wrongful Wish

Ranma stormed in the dojo rubbing the growing, egg sized lump on his
head.

"I�m home!" he called out. When no one answered he stomped up to his
room and slammed his door. "Stupid tomboy." He mumbled. "How can she be
so un-cute? All I did was say Ucchans cooking was good�" He slumped down
on his futon and plopped his head in his hands. "Why?" he muttered.
 The front door slammed, shaking the windows in the house. Akane he
guessed. He didn�t bother to get up to listen�she was loud enough to
hear from here. "I can't believe that�jerk!" she shouted. Ranma guessed
that someone else was talking because there was a pause. "What did he
do? He hit on Ukyou. That�s what." More silence. "I don�t care. She
might be his friend but I�I�" Ranmas interest peaked. <Hello? > He
thought. He began to get up when Akane bellowed. "Because he�s a jerk
O.K.?!" He fell back down on he futon in a huff. He heard more stomping
and a door slam.
 "She�s probably in her room lifting weights." He grumbled. "How
kawaiikune can you get?" He lay back on his pillow and stared at the
stars. "Some times I wish I�d never even come here." With that he fell
asleep.
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"I love you Ranma." Akane said. She wrapped her arms around his waist
and set her head on his chest. He ran his hand through her hair. "I love
you too, Akane." She looked into his eyes and their faces inched closer
until�Akane began shaking him violently.
"Wake up!" she shouted. She sounded alarmingly like Shampoo. "Wake up
stupid! Wake up!"
His eyes slowly opened and he saw Shampoo stand back. "Oh. Only
Shampoo." He rolled over and then sprang out of the bed. "Shampoo? What
are you doing here?"
"I live here stupid. Have dignity." She glared and threw his clothes at
him. Ranma realized that it was a little breezy and quickly put his
familiar black pants and red silk shirt on. "Now you dressed you do
house work." She threw an apron at him.
"Huh?"
 Shampoo glowered at him. "Are you deaf? Do house work. Cook clean." She
shouted. "No wonder Shampoo beat husband. He stupid and weak."
Now it was Ranmas turn to get angry. "What?!" he roared.
Shampoo smiled. "Shampoo challenge you and panda and win. Panda run away
but Shampoo easily beat you. Then find out you man and we marry." Her
look of ecstasy melted into one of shame and disgust. "But you wea�" She
stopped when she noticed Ranmas glow. <He no do that yesterday. > She
thought.
<How could I lose to her? > He thought. <And what happened to pop? > He
turned toward Shampoo. "What exactly happened to oyaji?" he asked.
Shampoo forgot her fear and began laughing hysterically. "We chase him
but he get away in panda form." She wiped a tear from her eyes before
laughing again. "Was very funny." She stopped laughing when she saw
Ranmas glow come back, five times greater.
"Figures." Ranma growled, clenching his fists. "When I get my hands on
him�" He turned toward the door but found Shampoos bonbori blocking him.
"Uh�excuse me?"
"No leave." She snarled. (My how our moods change.) "Do house work like
good husband."
"No." Ranma said as he threw the apron down.
Shampoo attacked without warning but her bonbori glided through the air,
but missing Ranma, reduced a nearby table to splinters instead. She
whirled around and swung again but felt her feet leave the ground and
her rear meet it. She stood and swung again with the same results. She
hopped to her feet and glared daggers at Ranma. Just yesterday he did
nothing more but stand there and now he was mopping the floor with her.
And she could feel him pull his punches. She decided on lunging one last
time. "You die now!" she shrieked.
Ranma saw the hole in her attack and decided to take advantage of it. He
threw a quick amagurikan sending Shampoo to the floor unconscious. "I'm
sorry Shampoo." He said. He opened the door and stepped outside.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 Cologne was happy. Happy with her self. Happy for Shampoo. Happy at
life in general. Shampoo finally found a husband and that meant that she
didn�t have to take care of her anymore. She had a lowly man to do it
for her. Plus Mousse would have to leave Shampoo alone. The day before
went well too. The guide brought the two Japanese men in to the village
just like she'd instructed him to. But the fat one got away. He would
have made a good servant. Oh well.
She debated on whether or not to check up on Shampoo and Son-in-law. The
fought a lot last night�wait. Shampoo fought, son-in-law was beaten.
<I'd better go check on them. > She thought. <Shampoo might kill him. >
She pogoed out the door and over to Shampoos house.
'Thump' 'Thud'. Cologne ignored the noises. The sounds came so often
last night that everyone overlooked them. Her ears perked when she heard
son-in-law shout something vaguely familiar. "What was that�" she
wondered aloud. She heard another muffled thump and Ranma stepped out
the door with a scowl on his face. She knew that they had been fighting
but her Shampoo always won. Ranma didn�t even look harmed much less even
tired. She decided to play ignorant. She sneaked up behind him, "Hello
son-in-law." She said.
Ranma jumped and spun around. "Oh�uh�hi!" He was visibly sweating.
Cologne smiled. "How is your wife?" she asked.
Ranma began sweating buckets. He knew that Cologne could tear him apart
if she wanted to. "She�um�uh�" he stammered intelligently.
"Mind if I check on her?" she asked and walked in with out an answer.
"Thanks."
Ranmas mind told him to haul butt out of there and he didn�t hesitate.
He knew that Cologne would be furious when she found Shampoo. He would
have to fight his way out. After that he would run�
"Ranma!" Cologne bellowed from inside. Ranmas instincts took over and he
sprinted toward the gate. He saw a woman throw a pail of water out her
door and Ranma was heading straight for it. As he plowed through it he
was grateful for the extra speed and the disguise it offered.
Cologne set Shampoos unconscious form on the ground and glared at Ranma.
"Get her!" she shouted. Instantly a horde of very angry and heavily
armed (swords spears and other various weapons of pain) women were
chasing after the red head. Ranma panicked her hands in the Takahashi
gesture of shock and bolted. She pounded the gate and its guards with a
quick Moko Takabisha, and continued running.
When she stopped to catch her breath she recognized where she was.
Jusenkyo. She shuddered remembering her fateful dip in a spring. But she
was here now and that meant�she headed toward the guide's hut and
knocked on the door. "Hello?"
The guide looked quite surprised to see her. So surprised that he forgot
to speak Japanese. He caught himself soon enough and tried to act calm.
"Oh! Y-young miss�sir. How can help you?"
Ranmas suspicion was aroused. "I need to get to the Nannichuan. Can you
show me to it?"
The guide nodded a little hastily and left the hut with Ranma in tow.
They finally reached the spring and Ranma jumped in�and cane out still
female. "N-no!" she shouted, slumping to the ground, sobbing. Now she
knew that there was no cure.
After the guide jotted something on a pad of paper he set a hand on
Ranmas shoulder. He felt bad about betraying this boy�er�girl�person to
the amazons. He would help him. "I so sorry. No know it no work. Can I
do something for you?"
Ranma stood up and wiped the tears from her eyes. She didn�t care that
guys weren't supposed to cry. She wasn�t a guy right now. She had no
cure for her curse. But she remembered something. Akane. She could start
over. "C-can you get me to Japan?" she asked hopefully. "And some hot
water?" She mentally kicked herself for making that wish.
The guide smiled. "No problem."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

People were staring at the large panda lumbering down the street. A
panda loose in the city? "Mommy mommy look." The little girl said as she
tugged on her mothers' arm.
"Yes dea�oh my god!" her mother replied as she picked up her laughing
daughter. "After I call the zoo we're leaving."
The panda couldn�t help but overhear this and shook his head in dismay.
<What luck! > He thought. <First this curse, then having my son beaten
by a woman, and now people staring at me. At least Tendo agreed to let
me stay with him. >
His wandering eventually brought him to a very large stone wall.
<Finally! > He thought. He opened the gate and sauntered in.
The girl in the yard noticed him and came up. "Can I help you?" she
asked. (Guess who?) The panda began to growl and growf. The girl stopped
him. "I'm sorry but I don�t speak panda."
The panda seemed to get an idea and pulled a sign out from nowhere and
began to scribble on it. He held it up when he was done. [My name is
Genma Saotome. I'm here�] flip [�to see Soun Tendo.]
The girl smiled pleasantly. "Oh my. What a smart panda." Genma face
faulted. "I'm Kasumi. Fathers inside." She led him into the dining room
and sat him down. "One minute please." She left and went into the dojo
where Soun was bawling as usual. Akane was smashing bricks in a corner
of the dojo muttering unprintable words. "Father?"
"Yes Kasumi?" he bawled.
"Your guest is here." She said. Soun stopped crying tears of happiness
and began to cry tears of Joy.
Genma looked up and saw his friend prance into the room then freeze.
Genma hopped up and gathered the man in an embrace. "Help!" Soun
shouted. "He's trying to eat me! Help!"
For the second time that day the panda face faulted. [Get me some hot
water please] he signed. Soun crept into the kitchen, to afraid to
disobey a smart (Bwa hahahahaha) panda, while Kasumi was trying to
explain something to him. When they finally got there he grabbed his
daughter by the shoulders. "Kasumi. Go get your sisters and meet me out
front." "But father�" "After I call animal control�" "Father�" "�I'll
lock the doors�" "Father!!" Soun stopped yammering and listened. Kasumi
didn�t yell like that for anything.
Kasumis smile was back rather quickly. "Father, that panda's name is
Genma Saotome."
Soun began bawling again and ran back out into the dining room while
Kasumi got the hot water. Soun wrapped his arms around the fat animal.
"Saotome! It's so good to see you." He broke the embrace. "But you�ve
aged terribly."
The panda face faulted again, as Kasumi poured the hot water on him. "Oh
my." She said at his change. "Thank you Kasumi. Now Tendo�Tendo?" Genma
noticed that the man was in shock. He slapped the thinner man a few
times. "Tendo! Snap out of it."
Soun shook his head. "Wha�" he said intelligently.
"I was about to explain that." Genma started his story of how his son
got lucky and knocked him into the pool and such but left out the fact
that Ranma was still in china. "And that is why I change." He finished
after a few demonstrations.
Soun was overjoyed. "Kasumi, go get your sisters. I have a surprise for
you." Then he turned to Genma. "Where is the young lad?" "Tendo�" "I
cant wait to meet him." "Tendo he isnt here." Soun stopped babbling and
stared at genma. "Care to run that by me again Saotome?"
 Genma found the floor suddenly very interesting. "Um�he�um�he's still
in china."
"What!?" Soun grew his Demon Head as his daughters walked in to the
room. "How could you Saotome?! In your postcard�"
"Daddy, were here." Kasumi said. Akane and Nabiki were hiding behind
her. "What was your surprise?"
Souns anger deflated and he began to sob. "I have none daughter." He
looked at Genma who was on the verge of tears him self. "What happened
to your boy?"
Genma burst out in tears. "He was defeated by a girl in china and then
Married her�"
Soun paled. "Married? He was supposed to marry one of my daughters�" He
then was distracted by a faint blue glow. "A-Akane?"
"You mean that you were going to give one of us to someone we don�t even
know?" Akane growled, her gi tinted blue from her aura.
"Well�" Soun began, "Not really�" the girls looked releaved. "Two of you
if I could�"
"What!!!" the three girls bellowed in unison. The two middle-aged men
knew their day was far from over.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ranma was tired, dirty and otherwise very peeved. After the guide helped
her get to a boat, he disappeared leaving Ranma to the sailors. The
women deprived men ended up in the infirmary at least three times a day.
Needless to say she didn�t get any sleep until she revealed that she was
really a guy. Still some of them�we wont get into that. Immediately
after getting off the boat she had been splashed by a woman throwing mop
water out her door. (What is it with mop water?) Then to top it all off
she ran into Ryoga. After Ranma threw him into a fountain, expecting a
small piglet come out, she was mildly surprised when a black hared girl
did instead. She thought back to the incident�
"Ranma die!!!" Ryoga bellowed as he sprung at the aforementioned boy.
Ranma turned, and looked happy, much to Ryogas chagrin, to see a
familiar face. "Yo, P-chan! What's up?" he said while casually stepping
out of the way. Ryogas umbrella shattered the concrete where he was a
moment ago.
"Don�t call me that!" he yelled. "I'm going to kill you for what you put
me through!" He struck the ground again.
"And what might that be?" Ranma asked sarcastically. <You put me through
hell! > His mind played back.
"You put me through hell!" Ryoga shouted, his strikes becoming more
frantic. "Stop dodging! You're supposed to suck!"
Ranma almost laughed as he tossed Ryoga into the near by fountain. "Well
good bye P-chan. Have fun porking around."
He got a good fifty yards away when a distinctly female voice shouted.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Ranma turned around and saw a very
good-looking girl standing, dripping wet, in the fountain. Wearing
Ryogas clothes. P-chan he could deal with, but Ryoga-chan. No. He turned
and ran Ryoga in hot pursuit. After oh�ten seconds of running Ranma
heard her shout, "Where the hell am I now?"
�and was very happy that a certain pig wouldn�t be sleeping with her
fiancee. Then it had started to rain. Very cold, very wet rain. Ranma
didn�t want to get to the dojo in her cursed form but she had to now.
<Oh well�> she thought. <At least I can try to get along with Akane. >
She looked around and recognized where she was. Furinkan High. "All
right!" she shouted. "I'm home!"
Ranma immediately jumped on the fence and ran toward the dojo. When she
neared it she slowed. "What if Akane really doesn�t like me. What if
Soun thinks I'm a failure? I mean, I lost to Shampoo. But that wasn�t
ME. Well it was but�" Her mind slapped her a few times. <What if and
but�just do it you idiot. >
She considered arguing with her mind but that would only make people
stare. More than those who already were. She continued walking toward
the dojo feeling a little better. "O.K.!" she said. "I'll make a good
impression on her."
She finally reached the gate and pushed it open a little hesitantly.
<Here goes. > She stopped at the front door and began to knock but
remembered that she lived here. Or did� Ranma walked in and heard some
one talking. Someone who sounded strangely like her father. She sneaked
toward the dining room and caught the tail end of his speech.
"�and my ingrate son cant even fight. He has no honor anymore, marrying
that Amazon." Ranmas vision turned red as she tried to keep her anger
under control�and failed. She leapt over the table with a cry, picked
Genma up and pinned him to the wall. He was surprised to say the least.
"Um�hello boy�"
"You could have tried to get me out of the village, Oyaji." Ranma
growled.
"Boy? I didn�t know you had a daughter Saotome." Soun asked.
Ranma threw her father out into the koi pond with unerring accuracy and
turned toward Soun. "He doesn�t." she looked at the floor. "Can I get
some hot water? I can explain everything."
On cue Kasumi left for the kitchen followed by a wet panda. Nabiki
walked up to Ranma and studdied her. "If Mr. Saotome doesn�t have a
daughter then you must be his 'son'." She poked Ranmas breast for
emphasis.
Ranma slapped her hand away as Kasumi upended the hot water over her
head. "Please don�t do that." Nabiki backed away apon seeing his change
but stopped to look him over. He looked around the room at all the
amazed occupants. "I'm Ranma Saotome. Sorry 'bout this."
End Part 1