This fic suffers from a common Lemon weakness, excessive eagerness to 
get to the ecchi.  It had a few too many victims, I think, leading to a
monotonous "girl shows up, girl gets to zap a couple of 
tentacle-soldiers, girl gets raped" format, repeated as many times as 
necessary.  Fewer victims who put up a better fight would have made 
the action less mechanical.  

I would, of course, have been happier if the demons had been defeated, 
since I tend to prefer it when the good guys come out on top, although 
not necessarily without suffering in the process and perhaps 
experiencing losses.