Ranma 1/2 is owned by Rumiko Takahashi 


Practice Makes Perverted
--------------------------------

By: Anand Rao


"Ranma?  How many children do you want to have?"  Nodoka asked.  She was 
sitting on the sofa in the Tendo living room sifting through an old 
photo album. 

"Huh?" Ranma replied, glancing away from the television program he was 
watching.  

"Children.  How many do you want?" Nodoka repeated.

"What?!  Uh, I dunno...  I haven't really given it a lot a thought, ya 
know."  He shrugged uncomfortably, quietly squirming on the sofa next to 
his mother.

"Really?  I'd think that being engaged for so long, you'd have given it 
some thought.  It's a logical step; a manly thing to do," Nodoka 
observed. 

Ranma winced at the word 'manly'.  "I'm still kinda young," he tried to 
explain.

"I suppose," Nodoka sighed.  "I wanted lots of children; a really full 
house!"

"Then why didn't ya?" Ranma asked.

"Your father wasn't exactly around," Nodoka replied, glancing at her son 
in amusement.

"Oh yeah."  Ranma laughed weakly, thinking about how much time his 
mother had been separated from her family.

"Ranma?  You do. . . know about children, don't you?  Where they come 
from, how to take care of them, and things like that. . ." 

"Yeah!" Ranma quickly responded, hoping his mother would change the 
topic.  "We, er, learned about all that stuff in science class." 

"Oh my.  They teach that in school these days, do they?  I'm glad, it 
really is important for a man to know how to plan and raise a family."

"I guess. . ," Ranma floundered.  The pair sat in companionable silence 
for a few moments, and Ranma's eyes drifted back to the television.  

"Ranma?"

"Yes, Mother?"

"Have you ever practiced what you learned in that class?"  Nodoka asked.

"What?!  No!  Never!  I swear!"  Ranma blurted, the television 
forgotten.

"No need to be embarrassed about it, Ranma," Nodoka soothed.  "You can 
always start now."  

"B-but Mom!"

"I mean, I'm sure Akane would help you," Nodoka suggested.

"A-Akane?  You gotta be kidding!" Ranma exclaimed.

"Oh?  What about Ukyo or Shampoo then, or maybe that nice Kodachi girl. 
She's rather high spirited," Nodoka observed.  "You could even ask 
Kasumi to help, she's perfect for this sort of thing; or Nabiki, 
although she'll probably charge you for the service."

"Mom!  I- I just can't- I mean, I'm not ready-"

"You don't want to practice by yourself, do you?" Nodoka asked 
reasonably.

"NO!" Ranma yelled, blushing furiously.

"Ranma-chan, if you feel that strongly or uncomfortable about it, -I- 
could help you."

"You. . . help. . ," Ranma whispered softly, just before he passed out.  

"Oh my!  Auntie, is something wrong with Ranma-kun?" Kasumi asked as she 
walked out of the kitchen and saw the fallen martial artist.

"I was about to suggest that he help me baby-sit the Yamadas' youngest 
daughter, and he just fainted," Nodoka replied, a hint of disapproval in 
her voice.  "How unmanly."


************************
The End


Author's Notes:

Please don't hit me.


Namaste,

Anand


Anand Rao
anandr@earthlink.net
anandr@deranged-otaku.com
http://www.deranged-otaku.com/

"He's a sex object.  He asks for sex and women object."


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