The FFML Reviews List
=====================
For the week of: October 10 - 16, 1998
Reviewers:
Paul Arezina <arezina@acad1.stvincent.edu>
Helen Szeto <Helen@eiw-ca.com>
Shunsuke <shunsuke@mailcity.com>
Synopses Submitted: 15 (plus one from last week)
* * * * *
[Neon Genesis Evangelion]
- - - - -
Title: Neon Genesis Evangelion - The New Age
Series: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Drama
Author: Dark Shadow
Email: baughj@rpi.edu
Homepage: http://www.rpi.edu/~baughj/newage
Date Sent to FFML: 10/13/98
Size: 14k
Summary:
An expansion of the events after End of Evangelion, dealing with Shinji and
Asuka's rude awakening in a new world. What happened to humanity, and did
the Third Impact bring happiness? What if Shinji was chosen to be the
architect of the new generation?
{Shunsuke}
Very weird...almost a surrealistic quality to this. It reminds me
of the end to Michael Moorcock's book _Stormbringer_ when everyone
is dead except for Elric when he sounds the horn...if you've read
it, you'll know what I'm talking about and what happens next. I
myself would like to know more.
Because of the way the author broke up people's speech (especially
Rei and Gendo) following conversations can be a little tough, but
otherwise, this makes for an interesting beginning without having
to reach into anything far-fetched or requiring a major change to
the original series.
* * * * *
[Oh My Goddess!]
- - - - -
Title: Oh! My Brother! Ch 9 - Urd
Series: Oh My Goddess!
Genre: Self-Insertion
Author: Christopher Angel
Email: c_j_angel@hotmail.com
Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/~ca_godboy
Date Sent to FFML: Oct 15, 1998
Size: ~25k
Summary:
Chris leaves to go to go with Saturn to Heaven. Urd follows. Chris meets a
friend in Heaven, and gets a little sidetracked...
[Helen]
Ooops! ^_^; I'm glad to see that OMB is on track again...
and the visit to Heaven isn't complete if the various gods
didn't go out for some ... umm.... drinks.. afterall, Urd's
there! ^^; But in all fairness, this follows in a solid
tradition of good writing and story development. With the
potential loss of a god, chapter ten is greatly anticipated.
* * * * *
[Ranma 1/2]
- - - - -
Title: Misery Loves Company Prelude, Love at First Glance
Series: Ranma
Genre: Next Generation/Darkish
Author: Ryan Erik
Email: ryanerik@xoommail.com
Homepage: http://members.xoom.com/RyanErik
Date Sent to FFML: October 17th, 1998
Size: 55k
Summary:
In the sequel to "A New Life," Kimiko (Ranma) arrives in Japan while waiting
for a relay flight to China. There she happens to have
several encounters with the children of her old friends and enemies alike,
some of which she become her new friends. How will she handle her situation
when she meets Akane and the rest of her friends, they not knowing who she
is? How will she react when she finds out who the children of her *murderer*
are? Most of all, how will she react when she sees Ryouga himself?
{Shunsuke}
Umm...except, one of the events listed above doesn't happen (don't
feel like including a spoiler).
The series prior to this was geared toward describing a long period
of time in a small number of scenes and events; it seems with this
new story and title that detailed events and a slower pace are what
we should expect, that "New Life" was merely written to get to this
point (though that's not to take away from ANL as a story).
When Ranma/Kimiko comes back, there's a sense that nothing's
changed, but that could be chalked up to people getting on with
their lives; not that much changed in Nerima in the interim except
for new faces. However, this seems written around Kimiko's
emotions, not as a "what if" story, and on that basis, it works.
- - - - -
Title: Of Hashbrowns and Nightgowns part 1
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Humor
Author: Keener
Email: otakunxs@bellsouth.net
Homepage: please.sir@i.want.some.html
Date Sent to FFML: 10/15/98
Size: 22K
Summary:
Nerima sleeps, dreaming of sugar frosted plumbers, eidible underwear, and
potatoes... meanwhile, a newcomer plots sinsiterly in the darkness. A score
must be settled, and Happosai best pay the piper lest all the panties be
danced off to neverland. A bit of a break from you daily dose of suicidal
pork, enjoy...
{Paul}
You know... This is NUTS! That happy silly fun fun kind of nuts...
on megavolt cola and uberpocky. So nuts that, despite the obvious
dark implications of an oddly bishonen pervert with techniques
unlike anything Happy's shown, I have to laugh. Nuts like Alan
Harnum's self-parody... is this Keener's self-parody? Does Keener
have a style sufficiently established enough TO parody? I don't
know. Read it and be ready to laugh... this takes the insanity
present in any given Ranma 1/2 episode and pumps it up a few
orders of magnitude. 10 of 10 for humor, 15 or 16 out of 20 overall.
{Shunsuke}
This is the product of someone with too much time on his hands,
that's the root of the problem. You'd really have to be digging in
dirt to come up with an idea like this one. By the time I finished
reading, I was coughing like someone with tuber-culosis.
Whatever can go wrong will go wrong, and whenever a fanfic writer
can write something that can make you cringe, he will, as Murphy's
Law might say. O_- (At least he didn't start quoting Ren & Stimpy,
as I thought was going to happen.)
- - - - -
Title: Ranmaspotting 8
Series: Ranma
Genre: Dark/Real
Author: neB
Email: kergillian@hotmail.com
Homepage: http://www.crosswinds.net/japan/~prpchan/little/
Date Sent to FFML: 10/14/98
Size: 9k
Summary:
The deaths take their tole on the Ranma cast.
{Shunsuke}
Well...this is a story full of love.
More of the same, just shorter this time. Let's see, there's...
three, four adults killed and at least two feotuses, and...well,
you get the picture. Liking this one is a matter of personal
taste. (Sorry to the author, no one else would touch this one.)
- - - - -
Title: Surreal Genius 6
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Altrenate history
Author: Brendan O'Donnell
Email: brenda02@sprynet.com
Date Sent to FFML: 10/15/98
Summary:
Surreal Genius the the story of Ranma in a world where the announcement of
Nodoka's second pregnancy shifted Genma's training plan from one extended
trip to a series of shorter trips. In Chapter 6, Kodachi arives.
{Paul}
Ah, been wondering about this. Hmm... it needs a good thorough
read-through. I'm bumping into misused words and fairly awkward
sentences every three lines or so, and that's bogging me down. The
fight scene in the gym and the hours before and after felt a bit
rushed, as compared to the rest of the story. Come to think of it,
the entire STORY felt a bit rushed. Just my own opinion, of course,
but I'm used to a more sedate pace. It wouldn't hurt at all to
flesh the story out a bit with more character interaction and such
when you go over and try to catch the errors... it's fairly good
for a draft, but as a near-final work it only merits 11 or 12 out
of 20.
- - - - -
Title: Three Souls, One Heart Chapter 4
Series: Ranma
Genre: Continuation
Author: David A. Tatum
Email: desaix@sysnet.net
Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Acropolis/7872/fanfics.htm
Date Sent to FFML: 10/13/98
Summary:
The Oni convinces Akane to help it, and then convinces her that Ranma isn't
as bad as she thinks he is by showing everyone else at their worst...
{Paul}
Okay, first let me just say that things seem more than a bit
contrived, at least on the Oni's part. Unless all Oni are blunt by
nature, the wording of the ploy strikes me as much less devious
than might be expected. After all, since there aren't any time
constraints, the Oni can build up to its revelations about Ranma
and his life as slowly and carefully as it wants to, and its life
(or semblance thereof) is at stake... it just seemed more than a
bit like a setup rather than a legitimate plot device. But aside
from that, this is quite nicely done. The writing is solid, as
always, even if things get a bit contrived at times... and you may
want to re-word the bit at the end unless, as above, the Oni is
blunt by nature. 13 or 14 out of 20.
- - - - -
Title: Stigma Part 5
Series: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Dark Thriller
Author: J. Austin Wilde
Email: wildeman@psn.net
Homepage: http://www.psn.net/~wildeman/
Date sent to FFML: 15 October 1998
Size: 55K
Summary:
A search warrant is served for the home of Hikaru Gosunkugi, Gos is
questioned, and Doctor Tofu makes an important discovery. To be concluded in
Part 6
{Paul}
Well. This little bit seemed very much like a character study on
Gosunkugi, at least a few parts of it. And, to be honest, if they
didn't go into all the detail in the manga, I can't tell the
difference. An odd setting for a character sketch, but then, a
character sketch was pretty close to necessary, given the
circumstances, wasn't it? And the dead girls continue to pile up,
in martial prowess if nothing else. One heck of a cliffhanger; I'd
say I can't wait for the final part except I've read it already...
as with the other parts, a very nicely done work with red herrings
galore, no doubt. 18 and up out of 20.
* * * * *
[Ranma 1/2 / Evangelion]
- - - - -
Title:Alternate Future [part 9]
Series:Ranma 1/2 and Evangelion
Genre:Crossover
Author: James Lee
Email: JLee100441@aol.com
Homepage:http://members.aol.com/JLee100441/index.html
Date Sent to FFML:Oct 13 1998
Size:44 Kb
Summary:
Nabiki arrives at Tokyo 3. Asuka begins to get jeolous. Ritsuko starts to
get suspicious when this new girl seems to know things about Ranma.
Meanwhile Nabiki finds out just what she's gotten herself into.
{Shunsuke}
Aside from the deux ex machina of the AMS characters in earlier
chapters, the characterizations and events are not that far off the
mark (although I'm surprised that Nabiki didn't end up as Asuka's
mom). This part kind of throws events up in the air and changes
what seemed to be the direction of the earlier parts, but it's not
as though this was hastily done or on a whim.
The problems with earlier parts (homonyms and other errors) are not
as plentiful, but still occur more than they should; this could use
a prereader as do the other parts, but this is the clearest and
most readable of the series.
Oh, and one last minor nitpick: Misato wears purple and scarlet,
not red and black. Read Revelations 17:4-5 in the bible and think
of those gold coloured beer cans. O_-
- - - - -
Title: For the Sake of the Children, Chapter 9
Series: Ranma and Evangelion
Genre: Cross-Over
Author: Anand Rao
Email: anandr@earthlink.net
Homepage: http://www.deranged-otaku.com/
Date Sent to the FFML: 10-14-98
Size: 47k
Summary:
Ranma explains to Kaji how he was cured and the circumstances surrounding
Akane's death. Ranko gets a visitor at the end.
{Shunsuke}
The author may not have liked doing it, but if this had been done
any other way (in parts, or sans flashbacks) it probably wouldn't
have worked. As is, it's fine. Myself, I would have done more of
the self-exploration while Ranma was in the spring, but aside from
that, everything fits. There's not too much or too little.
With regard to how this stands in the series, I don't know, I've
not read any other parts. ^_^ But as a taster or a place for new
readers to jump in, this is a good starting point.
* * * * *
[Ranma 1/2 / Final Fantasy VII]
- - - - -
Title: Eugenics
Series: Ranma 1/2 - Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Dark Crossover
Author: Phillip Masters
Email: PhilMasters@webtv.net
Date Sent to FFML: 10-16-98
Summary:
An asteroid shatters the yin-yang balance of Ranma's life. Thousands of
years after mankind digs its way out of the rubble a mighty corporation by
the name of Shinra decides world domination looks good. They need an army
to assist them, and thanks to a mad scientist they now have the means of
creating the next level in Human weaponry.
{Paul}
Umm... just the first part, right? Well, it's only a teaser at this
point, but WHAT a teaser. *shudder* One heck of an opening scene,
and all the pieces haven't come even remotely close to clicking
into place yet. Interesting ideas if nothing else. 8 of 10 on the
short scale, and please say you've submitted the later parts for
review, hmm?
Oh. Note to all you authors out there: Make sure you include which
part or parts you're submitting for review, ne? Makes things a bit
easier on us.
{Shunsuke}
A very realistic scene of horror starts in this one, it read like
the nuclear explosion in the 1983 TV movie "The Day After". Sudden,
frightening, and totally unexpected. The second part, set in the
early fifth century, is like a worst-case scenario of the future,
part "Handmaid's Tale" and part "Starship Troopers", loathesome and
very unpleasant (the events I mean, not the writing). Right now
with little to go on the two parts don't make sense opposite each
other, but later parts will clearly deal with that. But most
important, the writing here makes you want to read the next part.
* * * * *
[Ranma 1/2 / Gundam Wing]
- - - - -
Title:Gundam W: Half Type 1a and 1b
Series:Ranma 1/2 Gundam Wing
Genre: Crossover
Author:Jiro and Ikami Maeda
Email: hiryu@tri-isys.com
Date Sent to FFML: October 9
Summary:
Mousse and Ryouga's adjustment to living in another Universe
{Shunsuke}
This is one that requires you know something about both series; it
jumps right into the action without any prologue or description,
just an explanation of how the crossover characters got there.
Certainly the violence is well described, (mmm...blood) but it may
require a chapter or two for new readers to catch on to what's
happening. (That's observation, not commentary.) For GW fans,
this will be easy going, for people new to GW, you'll need to do
a little research before jumping in.
* * * * *
[Sailor Moon]
- - - - -
Title: Kingdoms (Chapter 1)
Series: Sailor Moon (Original elements)
Genre: Espionage/Political Intrigue/Lime
Author: Andrew Dynon
Email: adyn1@students.latrobe.edu.au
Date Sent to FFML: 12 Oct 1998
Size: Approx 20 KB
Summary:
In the time before the rise of Queen Beryl and the fall of the moon kingdom,
the nobility of the various planets manuver against each other, attempting
to further their own agendas. In the first chapter, representatives of the
various kingdoms are on Mercury to sign the planet's neutrality treaty...
but the Plutonian spy Era Hades has another reason for attending
{Helen}
It's a solid introduction into the Silver Millennium world of
Sailormoon, even as other authors have mused about this past
world (I'm sure that Pluto must have a hand in this somewhere...
^^). Dynon develops the relationships within this era to an
interesting peak...everything is not as it appears. The
introduction of the spy Hades makes for an interesting
confrontation amongst the members of the Outer worlds...
I'm looking forward to the next chapter and further
development of the different characters.
* * * * *
[Tenchi Muyo!]
- - - - -
Title: Legacy Of Tears Book 1: Epilogue
Series: TM! Based
Genre: lighthearted.
Author: Trakal
Email: Trakal@map.com
Synopsis:
In a quick wrap up of Book 1, Shiasta and Miaku return home after a year
with their new baby daughter Ichiko. (concludes Book 1 of the Legacy of
Tears series.)
{Shunsuke}
A pleasant little snippet of life, WAFFy, but not so that you gag.
On its own, there's not much here, and given that it matches the
tenor of the other parts, I don't see why this is by itself unless
it was written after the previous part and doesn't fit into Book 2
of the series. Still, it's nice stuff.
* * * * *
[Tenchi Muyo! / Evangelion]
- - - - -
Title: Angels, Heaven, and Earth prologue (revised) + part 1
Series: Tenchi/Evangelion
Genre: Crossover
Author: Ken Arromdee
Email: arromdee@inetnow.net
Homepage: http://www.inetnow.net/~arromdee/fanfic.html
Date Sent to FFML: Oct. 14 1998
Size: 42K
Summary:
It's the year 2015 and Tenchi and Ryouko are happily married. Their 14 year
old son is invited to a very special private school run by the Marduk
Institute. Against all odds, he's chosen to be an Evangelion pilot....
{Helen}
Instead of Kensuke, Akuma becomes the fourth child. The
story plays out to something very similar to the anime...
However, parts of Tenchi Muyo falls in...during Akuma's
interaction with Shinji. The story melds Tenchi Muyo
and Neon Genesis Evangelion in a manner that makes it
a fusion tale rather than a crossover. The writing is
solid and manages to carry the reader into believing
that the magic of Tenchi Muyo can exist within the
technology of Evangelion... and is not sufficiently
advanced technology considered to be magic? ^_^
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
And one more, this missed from last week:
* * * * *
[Sailor Moon]
- - - - -
Title: [FFML][Ranma/SM] A Different Viewpoint pt 36
Series: Ranma/SM
Genre: Continuation/Crossover/SI
Author: Christopher J. Olsen
Email: Gamers@pacbell.net
Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Dojo/1449
Date Sent to FFML: 10-7-98
Size: 38 KB
Summary:
The fight of the century is on, as Ranma and the Senshi fight for the
fate of the world against impossible odds. Akane goes one on one with
War! Ukyo shows Pelelance how a good chef cooks, and a Demoness and
three Godesses do Cameo apperances.
{Shunsuke}
This doesn't just _have_ two fight scenes, that's all the story is!
And quite well done at that...no unnecessary descriptions or wasted
words, just the essentials and getting down to business.
The first fight described (war, famine, etc.) is quick and dirty,
with some gruesome yet not gratuitous scenes and violence, the
imagery and threat coming across as truly nasty. The longer fight
involving many more of the R.5/SM/AMS characters is much the same,
though it doesn't seem as bloody. Sometimes it's hard to pin down
who is where and doing what to whom, but the battles are certainly
not unbelievable or silly.
In terms of storyline and events there's not much to advance the
series, but that's no surprise nor problem with a chapter based
around fights that take place in only a few minutes. The story's
formatting could use a little work, but that's not much of a gripe
for this one.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
End of the Reviews List for the week October 10 - 16, 1998.
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