It's late.  I'm down to my last four pop.  I've had a really
bad day.  Oh! No! It's happening again!  I'm no longer in
control of my body, it's being controlled by anger,
outrage and simply disgust.  I just can't take it anymore I
gotta ... I gotta ... SCREAM!!!

S C R E A M
<a generic C&C ing>
<brought to you by Jonathan>


	You know what?  There are a lot of fanfiction
types out there.  There are lemons, darkfics, fuzzyfics ...
well you name it and we got it.  However, I'm am just
sick and tired of reading a certain type of fanfic.  You
know what I'm talking about, those ego-gratifying, poorly
written pieces of trash I like to call self-insertion 'fics.  I
hate them.  I think that there is no greater waste of time
then to write a self-insertion 'fic.  Well, I guess that is
unless it's reading one.
	Now don't get me wrong I'm sure that there are
some good self-insertion 'fics -- at least my friends say
there are -- but those are hard to come by.  The typical
self-insertion 'fic -- in my opinion -- is where the author
decides to go on some ego boosting power trip and
writes a story with him or herself as a god (or goddess
as the case may be) in the 'fic.  You should be aware of
what I'm talking about, I'm sure almost everyone on this
list has read at least one bad self-insertion 'fic (I just
seem to have an inordinate amount of ill luck in this
respect).  The traits of the ego boosting power trip
probably goes as follows:  the author has latent martial
art abilities and enough ki to flatten all of Tokyo, or has
sex with all the good looking characters of the opposite
sex, or plays matchmaker and fixes up the characters
with long and loving relationships, and finally befriends
all of the principal characters all of which takes place
before supper.  Speaking of supper, the author makes it
for all his or her new friends and has a greater cooking
abilities than Kasumi and Sasami combined.
	Please!  If you are having enough trouble in
your life that you have to write one of these 'fics I
suggest extensive psychological help.  If you don't have
a poor sex life and have tons of friends and still feel
inclined to write something that should -- and probably
would -- find the wastebasket during one of your more
lucid moments go ahead, it's your time.  Just don't share
it with the rest of us.  It's gotten to the point where I can't
even look at a self-insertion 'fic without feeling sick to
my stomach.  Conditioned reflex I guess ... see the self-
insertion fic, see Jonathan run to the bathroom and
throw up.  They serve one purpose, well ... two purposes
to the general reading public: (a) it's a waste of time, (b)
it gives Megane 6.7 something to MST but that's about
all.	
	You know, for once I would like to see a self-
insertion 'fic that would have some base in reality.  For
example why should the author feel right at home in an
Anime environment, wouldn't it be the biggest of culture
shocks.  You are going from your safe comfortable
home to a place that is known for, crazy martial artists,
demons, cat-girls, bounty hunters, and mecha vigilantes;
wouldn't that not send you into a state of panic.  I know
that most of us here are otaku but still if you found
yourself in a place that your mind logically told you did
not exist you would have just a little bit more trouble
trying to fit in.
	Hey now!  That's what I would like to see, a
fanfiction writer that finds him or herself in an Anime
world surrounded by those crazy martial artists, demons,
cat-girls, bounty hunters, and mecha vigilantes.  The
author would then proceed to flip out and try to avoid
being killed in the following brouhaha.  My guess is that
the author would spend most of his or her time
screaming "That's it, we're going to die!" or "What the
hell was that!" or "How did you do that?" in real human
style.  That would be real, that would be exciting, THAT
would be entertaining.





Post notes:

Well now that I'm back in control of my body I guess I
should explain something.  This is not spam.  Well I
don't consider it spam, you see I believe that this is just
a C&C on a broad basis.  To give an example, instead
of C&C ing someone's work I'm just doing a general
C&C of fanfiction types that have pissed me off lately.               
This week it was the self-insertion 'fic, next week ... who knows.

Until next time where I can't stand it anymore.

J.L. ;p





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