On Mon, 12 Oct 1998, Freemage . wrote:

Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1998 23:48:33 PDT
From: "Freemage ." <freemage@hotmail.com>
To: ffml@fanfic.com
Subject: [FFML][R.5][SPAMfic]A typical day at the Nerima branch of the Japanese IRS

All right, this is two of these SPAMfics that have resulted from C&C on 
Gary Kleppe's Hearts & Minds preludes.  One more, and I'm gonna start 
calling 'em HaMfics.


*********************************************************
*A typical day at the Nerima branch of the Japanese IRS *
*A SPAMfic by                                           *
*   Freemage, who blames Gary Kleppe for all of it.     *
*********************************************************

Overheard at in the office of the Individual Returns Auditor, Japanese 
IRS, Nerima Ward office.

"No, Mr. Saotome, you can't declare a panda as a dependent."

"No, Mr. Tendou, you can't claim Mister Saotome."

"No, Sir.  You cannot declare those panties... Hey!  Those are my 
wife's!"

"No, I don't know how to get to the Tendou Dojo."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Saotome, but we will need to see the birth records of 
this 'Ranko' before you can declare her."

"No, Mr. Kunou, we do not accept pineapples as payment."

"No, I don't know how to get to the Tendou Dojo!

"Excuse me, Mr. Sanzenin?  You're claiming _how much_ for lip balm?"

"Miss Shiratori, would you please put back my ashtray?"

"Miss Tendou, would you please put back that stack of money?"

"Miss Tendou, please put away that mallet.  Threatening an IRS agent is 
a serious offense."

"I'm sorry, Ms. Kuh, but I cannot allow you to send that much out of the 
country without some taxation."

"No, Miss Shan.  I am most certainly _not_ for killing."

"No, I don't know how to get to the $#&*ing Tendou Dojo!  Now get outta 
here before I call the cops!"

"Really, Mr. Su!  That sort of behavior is totally inappropriate here, 
even if you weren't doing it to my leg!"

"Excuse me, Mr. Sasuke, but how many years have you gone without Social 
Security payments?"

"I'm sorry, Miss Kuonji, but your father should have declared the lost 
yattai on his return for that fiscal year."

"Miss Tendou, I'll have you know that a mere plate of brownies cannot 
sway my judgement.  Now if you were to throw in a fresh pie, too...."

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAAHAHA! Oh....my lungs...
I especially the Happousai & Kasumi quotes.

--Freemage

Sorry about this.

Don't worry. We know whom to blame.

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