I'm still blaming Catnip-kun for this one.  But he's 
right.  Sooner or later, *someone* was going to do it...

--

BRIDE OF RANMA
      by Tonbo


The four fiancees sat on the floor of the Tendo living room,
fuming!

Akane began with, "I should have known something like this
would happen if you went off to some private academy!  But
a Junior High School girl!?  Honestly, Ranma, that's too
hentai even for you!  Why do you always do things like
this?"

"I didn't do nothin'!  This upperclassman took one look at
me when I was a girl, and started hittin' on me, sayin' all
this stuff about 'another beautiful prince' or somthin'.  
So I challenged him to a duel to make him lay off."

"But, where does this new hussy come into the story?" asked
Kodachi, indicating the demure female who seemed to have
permanently affixed herself to Ranma's side.

All four girls glared at the too young foreigner in the too
cute fuku with the *WAY* too short skirt.  She had been
hovering around Ranma since he had brought her home with him
on this, his first vacation break from the new school he had
recently been transferred to.  She radiated such domesticity
as to eclipse even Kasumi, yet something in her submissive
manner suggested a hint of subtle eroticism which was
entirely the opposite of the older Tendo sister.

They all hated her instantly.

"Well, I still don't understand it all, but it seems she
was engaged to that guy I beat."

"And now, she's engaged to you." snapped Akane.

"Uh, well, actually-"

"Hey, quiet girl!" called Shampoo, "What you do this for? 
Why you dump boy you with?  Was too weak?"

For the first time since their arrival, the dark-skinned
girl with the purple hair pinned tightly up around her
collar
spoke.  "I belong to the champion of the duel.  Only
Ranma-sama may do with me as he pleases."

At the words, "Do with me as he pleases," all four girls
facefaulted.

"RAANMAAA...!" began Akane as she started to raise a
clenched fist.

The sudden way the stranger flinched at this display of
imminent violence told volumes to the four rivals.  Even
Akane was startled out of her fury by the sight of someone
who was obviously far too accustomed to being hurt.

Quickly, Ranma cried out, "I didn't do nothin'!  Honest! 
She don't know what she's talkin' about!"  Then he turned
to his new acquaintence.  "And you, I've told ya to stop
calling me that."

"But we are engaged, Ranma-sama."

"I never agreed to this engagement or whatever you call it!"

"But, Ranma-sama, you've already fought seven times in duels
because of it."

"You've what!?" cried the other four in unison.

"It's kind'a weird," Ranma rushed to explain.  "Some people
at the new school keep challenging me to duels."

"With her as the prize?" responded Kodachi.  "In this day
and age?  How positively barbaric."

"Is not right use woman as property.  Is *man's* place!"

"Why don't you just let yourself lose, Ranchan?"

"Lose?  You kiddin'?  Those guys ain't no match for me!"

"Ranma no baka!" yelled Akane, stomping out of the room.

The newcomer visibly relaxed.

"Does she know about your curse?" asked Ukyou.

The newcomer lowered her head slightly, and said in a quiet
voice, "I know all about curses."

"Stupid quiet girl no can fight for self?  Need others to do
fighting for, instead?  How can husband love weak girl like
that?"

"I never said I loved no one!" protested Ranma.

"I hate to say this, Ranchan, but it looks like you really
got stuck with a lemon this time."  Despite her irritation,
Ukyou was surprised to find herself feeling just the
slightest bit protective of this new rival.  "Well, you're
here now.  What's your name, anyway?"

"My name is Himemiya Anthy.  I am the Rose Bride, and I am
Ranma-sama's flower."


        The End

--

Author's notes:


Yeesh!  As if I have *ever* wanted to write a "Ranma gets
yet another fiancee" story!  All I can do is blame this 
on my friend, Catnip-kun.  He has this amazingly annoying 
ability to plant ideas in my head that just won't let go!

And no, I will not be continuing this.  This is spam.  I
just wrote this because C-kun said, "You do realize, don't
you, that it's only a matter of time until someone writes 
the first Ranma/Utena crossover."

Besides, that show creeps me out too much for me to write 
in that universe.  I loved it, but by the end, I felt like
I was trapped inside The Screwtape Letters & couldn't get 
out!

--

Epilogue:


"Saotome Ranma!  I challenge you!"

Kuno stood in the middle of the street, his boken pointed
squarely at the object of his enmity.

Anthy took one wide-eyed look at the Blue Thunder of
Furinken High, then turned to her fiancee and made the
closest thing to an assertive statement he had ever heard
pass from her lips.

"Please PROMISE you'll win this one."

Ranma cracked his knuckles with anticipation.  "You better
just hope you don't end up engaged to a pig someday."

--

Tonbo
tonbo@onramp.net

--

Ohtori Academy:
You can check out any time you like,
but you can never leave...