Ronny Hedin <thark@hem2.passagen.se> wrote:

Unlike the previous speaker (in the shape of Alan Harnum ^_^), this
prelude touches me more than the previous one ... which, I must say,
didn't feel much at all ... but then I've never quite really seen
death as that bad a thing. Dunno.

Depends on your experiences, I suppose. Anyway, I'm glad to hear that
you liked this one. :)

	PRONOUNCIATION NOTE: "Mu Si" is, as best as I'm able to

*restrains self from shouting "who gives a f***** f***"* ^_^

*restrains self from reposting all the old FFML arguments on *Japanese*
Romanizations...*

	"So sorry, Mr. Mu never know what he going to get." It was true.
Mu Si's martial arts master had taught him he could never be aware of
what was inside; for if one knew what one could get, then one also knew

Doesn't he use the same weapons/techniques repeatedly? But maybe
that's just luck. Or lack of imagination on Takahashi's part, but
that sounds unlikely. ^_^

No... it's more like the Law of Plot Convenience. In other words, there
IS a reason why he gets what he gets, it's just that he himself doesn't
understand it.

	A voice sounded from within the appliance. "CHARGE!" It pushed

A note as to the qualities of said voice?

OK, I suppose that'd be good.

	"I'm going to seal up the boxes. I've got this really strong
tape, the kind they call --"

...

an *UNSPOKEN* horrible word pun?

*feels sudden urges to strangle author* ^_^

Geez, not like I haven't done this sort of thing before... :)

	Once there was a girl named Azusa. Azusa had long, wavy hair and
big blue eyes. She lived with her Daddy and her friends, in a big house
with a wall around the yard.

And the sky was clear blue, the grass green green, and the sun a
big yellow ball? ^_^

Nope, it was evening! Gotta keep scene continuity straight.

	Stephanie was a plaque, colored bright sky blue. Graceful
pictures of birds in flight adorned it. Mousse read the words on it. *If
you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's yours. If not,
it never was.* With the heavy leash chafing against his neck, Mousse was
not pleased by the irony.

You know, a metallic leash seems a bit bad even for Azusa...

...and shouldn't it be just "iron"?...

...err, nevermind. ^_^

It's not really genuine iron... just sort of iron-y.

sleep, but the (...) awake, and he

	Sleep eventually came. Shampoo fought her way into Azusa's

came, and Shampoo

I'm not sure why these would be better.

	"Michelle was a little cloth doll, with yellow string hair and a
red dress. I took her to school a long, long time ago. Everybody liked
Michelle. They all told me how cute she was, even the ones that didn't
talk to me before that."

Uh? How'd they tell her if they didn't talk to her? ^_^

No, they didn't talk to her UNTIL she had the doll.

Thanks for the commentary!


Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics