QUANTUM COCKTAIL
No need for Instrumentality
PART 1 of 4
ACT 1 of 3
Author's notes.
"Quantum Cocktail: No need for instrumentality " was originally meant to be posted in one whole piece. (This is roughly the first quarter of the first 1/3 of the planned fic, which introduces about ten percent of the cast and none of the actual plot.) Unfortunately, I had not foreseen the time or effort that would just go into writing this first part. So, I have decided, probably against all reason, to post it in chunks. (This act will probably spawn all sorts of questions about story points that aren't covered in this part.)
At any rate! This is, or will be, a giant crossover entangled into one big plot that crosses the known universe and beyond; or it will be if I ever complete it.
" Quantum Cocktail ", the first act, takes place in the Star Wars universe (not that I'm a big fan, but its a place to start) and introduces the main cast of characters. The next act (at the moment called " Quantum Scramble ",) will deal mainly with developing the central plot. And the final part (Quantum Matchmaker) will deal with the end of the series.
But, the mess you are about to read is the first part of " Quantum Cocktail: No Need for Instrumentality ". Three more parts should follow this one; if I don't just get bored with it or horribly nuked by bad CC's and decide to stop writing the silly thing. So, ENJOY!
Any complaints, death threats, and messages that cannot be transmitted directly to me by astral means, or the sorts, should be sent to me at G_Eldonious@Hotmail.com
(The writing quality drops toward the end and the whole mess is pretty gosh darn boring. I promise to make up for it in the next part. )
PROLOGUE
A single light broke the pitch-black darkness of the room. The light formed a bright spire of luminescence that impaled the dark room on its single point. In the base of this cone of light appeared a red robed figure. He stood there ominously with his hands folded in the voluminous sleeves of his garment.
" I am Brother Red, " his voice broke the silence of the meeting chamber like thunder in the still night. " Is my Blue Brother present? "
Before the red robed figure's echo had left the chamber a second spire of light appeared. In the cone of light another robed figure appeared, this one colored a brilliant iridescent blue. Taking the same poise of his red brother. He called out.
" Brother Blue is here, " the blue robed figure let the echo die out and continued, "is Brother Yellow here? "
" Brother Yellow is here. " the voice ended in flourish as a dazzling yellow robed figure appeared in another cone, " is Brother White present. "
" I, BROTHER WHITE, the soul guiding force of all that is good and just..." a long silence pervaded the chamber, " am here." The light spire appeared dramatically on the last two words, illuminating a white robed figure who spun himself in a circle. The cloth of his white robes flung out from his person in a wild hurricane. The robed man spun onto his knee and knelt there breathing hard and head bowed from his exertion, in a breathless voice whispered, " is Brother Black, " a pause ", here?"
The next spire bore down on a man in a bright Hawaiian shirt. His hands tucked in his Levi blue jean shorts. The only other adornment was a Black hood covering the individual's head. And from that hood came, " Yeah I'm here. And it's casual day! Why the hell are you guys in full robes?" The robed figures looked down at themselves. Brother Black raised his right hand over his brow to block out the spotlight and looked up. " And can we turn the damn lights on?" The lights came on and filled the chamber with a warm ambivalent light.
In the center room was a large circular console surrounded by five, evenly spaced, black office chairs, minus the rollers; it had been theoretically proven that rollers were distracting and the council was still working on eliminating swivel chairs.
Brother Black strolled over to the chair directly in front him and sat down, after swiveling it in circle he propped his feet up on the console. The springs of the chair creaked as Black lounged back. " Huh...aren't the rest of you going to sit down?"
The other robed figures approached the console in stately manor and sat down. Brother Red leaned over opposite of Black and hurumphed. Black swiveled to face him.
Red gave a nod toward Black's propped feet. Black casually flipped him off.
Brother Blue collapsed in his chair and turned his head toward Black. " Brother Black I know that we called this on your vacation, but that is no reason for you to act like a jerk." Blue turned the chair away from black and sunk his head, and in a rather dull tone, " Anyway I think you hurt Brother White's feelings," he hesitated, " I think you made him cry."
" I am not crying * sniff *, " White passed a sleeve over his hood and sniffled.
" It's just, that that was one of my best entrances, and he had to go and ruin it, " an accusing finger jutted out of white's sleeve toward black. " I want an apology! "
Black adjusted his lounging position toward White, " Screw YOU, I don't apologize to anyone. Especially prissy arrogant little fairies that go around dressed in white and claiming themselves god's gift to the universe!"
" YOU TAKE THAT BACK YOU BLACK ROBED BASTARD! Anyway I am."
" UP YOURS! "
" I'M TELLING BURDULL! "
" GO AHEAD AND SHOW HER HOW INCOMPETENT YOU ARE! "
The following minutes continued like this. Brother Yellow threw up his arms and collapsed back in his chair and gave an exasperated sigh.
Brother Red Slammed his fists into the console ", DAMMIT! Will you both shut up! This is important!" The room promptly got as silent as death. " That's better, " Red leaned back and steepled his fingers, " Now, to the business at hand. " Red leaned forward and placed a hand on the dead black square on the console before him. A large green display of a sphere, composed of smaller spheres, materialized over the middle of the console. A small out of place red sphere blinked a little off center inside the sphere. Red leaned back in his chair, silent.
Everyone silently stared at the display, all comprehending what this meant. Black removed the sandal form his right foot, using the edge of the console to pry it off, and placed his bare foot on his own black control panel. The green circles disappeared until all that was left was a circular cross-section of the original display. The display further configured itself into a series of Pentagons. The original red sphere was now identified as single red line composing one of the smaller pentagon's sides.
Black uttered an oath and unproped his feet. " A tear? "
Yellow spoke up this time. " Yes a tear. You see why we felt it was urgent to call the entire counsel." Black was silent.
Blue placed his hand on the console. The display converted to a large view of a single sphere with a red patch. " As you can see it is no trivial tear." The display zoomed in on the red patch; a small scale appeared next to the patch giving an idea of actual size.
Black leaned toward it ", so what could have done it. A dimensional drive, space-time rupture...huh experiments by the locals?"
" No look closer." Red's hand glided toward the console and the display zoomed in. This time it showed a series of lines that made up the circle.
Black squinted and leaned close to the display. The dimensional fabric looks OK but the tear looks like it had been cleanly remo...Oh God!" Black stood up and slammed the console with his open hands, " That's a full scale Breach! " Black started pulling at his hood and yelling curses that would have made sailors into silence oathed monks after they had dropped dead of heart attacks. The others waited for this to subside.
Red Resumed, " As you can see this breach has removed destiny lines as well as physical lines." Red brushed his hand over the console again and the display changed to show the original sphere and its adjacent neighbors. The sphere adjacent to the red patch appeared misshapen. " And the dimensional barrier is already trying to compensate for the lose."
" Has anyone told Burdull yet?" Black had reseated himself.
" No she is busy with other matters. We may have to fix this ourselves." Yellow's announcement hit them all hard.
" We should tell Burdull." White whined.
" A3 level administrators are not allowed to interrupt A2 or A1 administrators when they're on business. " Red stated, " And you know that White."
" So we're on our own. " Blue's hand kneaded his armrests.
" Well let's start fixing it then before we have this entire quantum sphere collapsing on us." Black put his hand on the console. " Do we have a recording of the happenings that took place in the fabric before the breach?"
" Yes the recorders started as soon as they registered the first evidence and it has already been compared with the permanent record." Red applied his own hand to the console. The old display was replaced by a recording showing a small slightly A-shaped vehicle buzzing through a narrow canyon. The small craft skillfully buzzed around various obstacles in the canyon. The robes around the console watched until the small craft suddenly and inexplicably disappeared from existence.
" The destiny line disappears at that moment. " Yellow leaned back and crossed his arms.
Blue sat up and leaned over to place his own hand upon the console. " Then that is were we begin."
* * *
CHAPTER 1
MONKEYS SHOULDN'T RIDE DRAGONS
He had no qualms about the sky. It was a nice blue sky. He had nothing against the dry, hard pointy rocks gouging him in the back. That was to be expected. And he did not even have anything against Shen Long for dragging him away from his nice home to go tramping around the universe. But one single nagging thought ran itself through Son Goku's mind. Do eternal dragons normally run into canyon walls or is this one of those things that is so rare you just have to remember every detail to tell to your grandchildren.
And this thought would have repeated itself in his mind if it was not for a young freckled face placing itself in his and excitably chattering, " Are you OK Luke?! Are you OK!? Speak to me! Speak to me Luke! "
Goku sat up and wiped the spittle off his face, so recently placed there by the youth. " I .....," blearily, he looked around at the canyon walls, two strange A-framed vehicles, the long stretched out body of a Eternal wish granting dragon, " think...so." Then his mind reeled back and forced him to make a recheck of his surroundings. Canyon walls he nodded to himself Check. Strange vehicles he nodded Check. Giant long body of a certain eternal wish granting dragon named Shen Long Goku nodded to himself. That would be the problem. Goku got up to his feet and dusted himself off.
The youth was back in his face again and this time Goku made out some features. The young man stood about 6' and was topped by a mop of sandy red hair. Freckles framed his hooked nose. " I guess you are OK, but *&"@# you had me and Marty worried , when your speeder went down..." the youth moved to the side and gestured toward the body of the dragon. The youth's words trailed off as Goku walked past him toward another young individual who absently kicked at the fallen dragon.
" Looks like you wrecked this speeder good Luke, " the brown haired boy, Marty, turned toward Goku and kicked the dragon again, " its spread all over the damn canyon."
Goku turned to make sure there was someone behind him that Marty could be addressing, there stood the sandy haired youth looking down the canyon. " Excuse me are you Luke?"
The sandy haired teenager looked back at Goku and screwed his face in a knot,
" Geesh you must have hit your head hard Luke buddy. I'm Sam. If I were Luke I would be running to the nearest Sarlac before Kyle found me and demanded his money. You really screwed yourself over this time."
" And if I was Luke I would go out and look for a new speeder. This one is totally thrashed. " Marty came up and slapped Goku on the shoulder.
Goku ran his hands over his body. He ran his fingers through his black spiky hair and gave his tail a firm squeeze, equivalent to a saiyan pinch, he winced at that. And after making sure his signature orange and blue martial arts uniform was all in place, he risked a look over at Shen Long. He was definitely a dragon, not a " speeder " which he assumed was what the A shaped vehicles were, and also very alive. Goku watched a moment as a rippling breath ran through the length of the dragon visible to him, which was not the full length since the canyon curved off both ways.
And after asserting the fact that he was not the individual identified as Luke, he clapped his hand to the back of his neck and laughed, " Oh you've got me wrong. I'm not Luke and that's not a speeder that's a..." he blushed and ducked his head at the strange look Marty and Sam gave him, " ....dragon."
The two stepped back and looked Goku up and down, and after circling him, grabbed him by the arms and walked him toward the speeders. " Don't worry we will have to your Uncle Owen's in no time. Just hang on." Sam uttered reassuringly.
" B but....I .....whaatt...," a bewildered Goku struggled against their grips, but even though he could have easily broken free he did not wish to hurt them. I want to go home.
" Anyway we need to go before those $#*&^@ sand people start showing up. " Marty glanced up the canyon walls. " I'm sure they saw the speeder go down and are probably drooling over the salvage, " and after glancing at Goku, " the possible free lunch."
Marty attempted to look around Goku's spiked head to address Sam, but gave up when one of Goku's spikes poked him in the eye. " Sam get him to your speeder. I need to find Charley." Marty let go of Goku and started up a slanted rock to the top of the canyon wall.
" Charles get your freak'n ass down here! We found Luke! He's OK! Now come on!"
A small figure appeared at the top of the ridge, " OK Marty. The sooner the better. I thought I saw some Bantha toping the dunes can...." Charley never finished, a second figure had appeared immediately behind him and clubbed. Charley fell forward over the ridge, thankfully he hit the slanted rock that Marty occupied; unthankfully he bowled Marty over and they both came tumbling down. A ululating war cry came from the second figure who now twirled a wicked staff over its head.
" Oh shit, crap, and damn! " Sam uttered under his breath. He still had a grip on Goku, but Goku was to busy trying to figure out what was transpiring to here his curse. Sam looked over his shoulder to the fallen Marty, who was attempting to extract himself from Charley. " C'mon! Dammit!" Sam led Goku on toward the speeders.
Goku witnessed four other figures join the first on the ridge and the realization snapped into his mind. Hey we're being attacked! Goku easily freed himself from Sam's grip and flew over to the fallen Marty and Charles and grabbing one in each arm bounded back to Sam's position.
Sam was not there though. Sam, free from the duty of dragging Goku toward the speeders, had noticed the Sand People coming at him from around the back of the speeders, and following mankind's oldest reflex started scrambling up the nearest inclined rock to the top of the canyon. And the Sand People following their oldest instinct, that of the free and easy lunch, pursued.
Goku dropped the two teenagers in the shade provided by Shen Long's body and flew over to the group of Sand People chasing Sam, his chi flared wildly. With the speed legendary to saiyans Goku dispatched the entire group of five creatures before they had reached the slope.
Goku's first impression of these creatures was of a potato sprouting eyes, wrapped in bandages, with goggles and a potato slicer affixed to the front for a head. The rest of the body was covered in assorted brown rags and dark leather. The final attachment being a single staff enlarged at one end for clubbing unsuspecting teenagers over the head.
Sam had about reached the top of the canyon when he finally noticed that he was not being followed. He looked down at the bodies of the five sand people, arrayed perfectly in a circle and spread eagle, at Goku's feet. " Holy Mackerel Luke! I..IIII mean.. Woweeeee! I didn't know you could fight. Af...Af.ffaa after watching you huddle up in a fetal position every time someone laid a hand on you......Oh damn Man." Sam started sliding down the rocky slope.
Lucky for Sam, Goku had been staring at the top of the canyon wall instead of paying attention to him. He was the first to see the group of sand people, the one that had clubbed Charley, top the ridge and with another feral war cry, push a very large rock over the side, which was tumbling down the slope at Sam.
There was no time to react and if Goku did not do something Sam, the nice young misguided person who kept addressing him as Luke, would be smashed into a permanent rock adornment. Not to mention that when people attack without provocation he gets mad.
The chi flared within Goku, forming a bright circle of rushing energy around him. Small rocks and debris swirled away from him in a storm of fury. Goku felt his saiyan heritage come upon him, something that hair dyes and beauticians could not duplicate. And without thinking Goku stepped back into a crouch, bringing his hands to his side. The chi flared even more wildly, but this time Goku gathered it into a tight ball between his fists.
" Kameeeehameeeehaaaaa!!" with that Goku's hands thrust forward ejecting all the gathered energy in one large, very large, stream.
Now we can assume that the falling rock and the sand people are no more and that Sam and his comrades are fairly stunned at watching a large bolt of annihilating energy fly form their friend " Luke's " hands. We could even go on to say how Beggar's Canyon went on to earn its first easily navigable fork in the road. But why waste time?
* * *
The robes watched events with a bewildered sense of astonishment. The display in the middle of the console depicted what looked like a ship, with a barrel for a head and a cluster of rockets for its butt, being pursued by a giant malevolent wedge of cheese. That was until a large lance of energy came from the planet, where the previous events had taken place, to run through the barrel headed ship, promptly blowing it into oblivion.
Blue slumped back in his chair, " Whose bright idea was it to send a Goku destiny line to fix the breach?" Three fingers pointed directly at Black.
Black looked up from picking at one of the many palm trees decorating his brightly colored shirt, his fingers now absently rubbed at the small tree as if in effort to wipe it from existence. " Hey you guys said that we had to replace the old line with a new line of great power. This Goku line was free and being dragged off by a Shen Long analogue. I decided to use it before it got wasted on that bastard Shen Hydras. I did the guy a favor." He leaned back again and returned his attention to the small palm tree. " Anyway if any of you think you can do a better job go to it."
Blue leaned forward and rested his head on his hands, " the important thing your missing Black is that the original time line of the dimension must be preserved. The previous Luke destiny was not powerful at the beginning he built up his power through training and experience. Goku is to powerful for the line at this moment."
Red nodded, " Indeed, and he has just started a greater incontinuity by destroying the ship that was to bring the Droids, that contained the plans important to the rebels, into Luke's custody." Red sat up straight and placed his hand on the black neural interface before him. " And this also means that the Leia destiny line has been eliminated. Which will be important in future events."
Yellow messaged his temples, " we must try our best to keep the original line intact and to accomplish that we must gently push it back to its original shape."
" Then you're taking responsibility Huh." Black leaned over placing an elbow on the armrest.
" Yes, " Yellow replied curtly.
" I think we should still tell Burdull," White whined.
" SHUT UP! "
CHAPTER 2
A GENTLE PUSH
Goku was glad he did not have to meet this " Uncle Owen " the night before. Sam, Marty, and the recovering Charley had got him to " Uncle Owen's " moisture farm late last night and, after telling him were " Luke's " room was, left. Goku was tired though and felt he only had the mental capacity to make it to his " Bed " before conking out for the night.
The morning made up for the lack of confusion last night though. Goku had gotten up early the next morning and had started his morning ritual of martial arts, having lost a lot of sleep because he was not used to sleeping alone. Thoughts of Chie Chie, Gohan, Gotan, and the rest of his friends filled his mind during his morning exercise. They must be having fun right now. And for all he knew there was a giant unconscious dragon laying in a ditch somewhere.
A soft, motherly voice started calling out " Luke, Luke, Where are you! Breakfast!" It took Goku a while to realize that he was supposedly " Luke " and answer the call.
" Aaaaahhh...I'm here. But.....," he walked over to a small rise and looked down into what looked like a small courtyard with machinery in the middle of it. " I'mmm...nno," he stopped when he saw a motherly type face stare up at him and give him one those smiles that you dare not disturb with a worrisome thought.
" There you are Luke," she smiled sweetly. " Your up early or have you just been up all night daydreaming. Well I don't care. Its time for breakfast and Owen wants to talk to you." She turned and entered one of the many alcoves leading off from the courtyard.
Goku sighed. He did not know why he just did not fly off the night before. It was strange. He did not have to stay, but he felt some obligation to. Anyway he did not have anything better to do until he found out what was going on, maybe Shen Long would wake up soon and haul him off again. But, the thought of food overrode all these previous thoughts, saiyan hunger and all.
As Goku turned to the entrance he gave a groan. He had not previously noticed the small entrance to the family compound. It resembled a small dome with a small arched doorway. If he were to add some bright red kanji....... It'd look just like home. The homesickness inside him increased. This felt like it was the start of the longest day in his life.
***
Darth Vader was glad this suit vented out sweat or he would have drowned in it about an hour ago. He had been standing in this very spot, awaiting the capture of Tantive IV, when the blast had come from the planet and destroyed the ship. A blast that was powerful indeed to destroy a Corellian Corvette in one shot.
" Lord Vader we have scanned the entire planet but cannot find the origins of that blast or the kind of energy needed to power it, " the small bridge officer, dressed in an olive drab uniform, stood at attention. " We are now awaiting new orders. "
Vader supposed he was in debt to whatever originated that blast, it saved him the trouble of retrieving the Death Star plans and the Princess of Alderran. But then again, Darth Vader was in debt to nobody and he could not bear the insult of having someone finish his job for him.
" It must be a rebel ploy." He made sure to emphasize his statement with a lot of heavy breathing through his respirator, it kept those under him in line.
Vader turned with a flourish of his long dark a'vant garde cape. " Captain have your men retrace the origin of that blast and send down a reconnaissance party. I want you to find those responsible for the destruction of that ship and bring them back alive. Leave no stone unturned and blockade the entire planet if necessary, " more heavy breathing, " that weapon could be of use to the Empire. " Vader marched off the bridge, pleased with another Oscar winning performance.
***
Goku looked sullenly across the table at " Uncle Owen."
" Luke I need you for the Harvest this year. You can go to the Academy next year."
" Huh?....."
" And you can go to Tashi Station later and get all the power converters you want, but I need you this morning when the Jawa traders come by."
" Wwwwhat...?"
" Luke you need to quite whining and arguing with me or the harvest will never get in."
" Uhhhhhh?"
The morning dragged on like this during breakfast. It was like this Owen person was going through some sort of morning routine involving this Luke character, who he was recently supposed to be.
" Here Luke have another bowl, " his " aunt " handed him another bowl of vegetable mash, which was what came out of the juicer whenever she stuck some poor plant into it.
He took it and started uncharacteristically spooning it slowly. It was his general opinion that this was not food, but in fact a form of keeping hyperactive teenagers from being not so hyper active.
" Well Luke we better get started. " Owen stood up and adjusted his farmer type garb. Goku did not answer, he needed real food to get started in the morning. That and he still did not quite identify with the name Luke yet.
" Luke? "
".........."
" Luke? "
".........."
" LUKE! Answer me Boy when I'm talking to you," Owen slammed his fist down on the table. The bowl of malnourishing vegetable mush rocked.
Goku looked up dully, " My name is Son Goku." He looked back down at the mush.
" Huh? Luke?"
" Son Goku. "
" L..u..k..e.. Skywalker, " Owen drew out the family last name.
" S..o..n ...G..o..k...u. "
" Ah hell. Luke, get up and get going. I don't care what punk names you go around using with your friends. Now, I hear the Jawa sand crawler and they will be here soon. Now c'mon." Owen turned and tromped out the door.
Another battle lost, Goku reflected rising and following Owen. I need to figure a way to find what's going on or at least a way to get through his thick skull.
Goku and Owen emerged out in the morning sun as a large creaky looking box on treads rolled up to the front of the farm. Once the vehicle came to a straining halt a side door opened and a ramp lowered and a series of hooded little folks with glowing eyes came skittering out.
The " Jawas " quickly set out about the vehicle walking to various crane devices and lowering all manner of machinery. Owen uttered something under his breath and walked toward the mass of busy creatures. Goku noted the level of rust on the machine and dejectedly walked after.
***
Black looked over at Yellow, " So, you know that the droids that contain the plans aren't there, what are you going to do?"
" Just watch the master work."
***
Owen looked the young red haired girl standing before him up and down, then turned to the Jawa standing next him. " She's a droid? " The Jawa just shrugged and chittered something.
Owen looked back at the " Droid. " It resembled a young red head in a sailor type dress. Her eyes were a bright green and a single cute fang showed as she smiled at him.
" So what kind of droid are you? " Owen asked, wondering why he had never seen anything like her before.
She held her index finger to her mouth and crossed her eyes in a cute pose. When she seemed to come up with an satisfactory answer , she looked down at Owen, thrust out her chest, and standing straight like soldier, proudly announced, " I don't know."
Owen lost balance momentarily and about fell on his arse. When he regained his balance he looked straight in her face, " You don't know?"
She shook her head up and down vigorously, smiling like an idiot.
" No, idea at all."
She continued shaking her head and smiling.
" No not this one," Owen simply stated to the Jawa and started walking to the next Droid in line, " what use do I have for droid that doesn't even know what she is."
Goku walked after Owen but stopped when he saw the cute red headed girl collapse to her knees and start crying. " Huuh ...Are you all right... miss? " Goku stooped over and rested his hands on his knees to look her in the face.
Through eyes quickly filling with tears she looked up at Goku. " He doesn't want Nuku Nuku, " she sniffed, " why doesn't he want to buy Nuku Nuku?"
Goku looked after Owen who was now standing in front a very large bestial mech. " Gee, I don't know. " He looked back at the red haired girl and patted her on the head, sympathy filling his heart. " You're a hard worker aren't you? " She nodded her head and sniffed, she used a hand to wipe away a tear. " Then I will go see what I can do. If Uncle Owen knows your willing to work hard he will probably buy you."
The young red head immediately smiled, jumped to her feet, and glomped him. Goku ,not knowing what to do, just clapped the back of his neck with his hand and laughed.
" There, all better, " he patted her gently on the back. He winced as she hugged him tighter in gratitude. Boy she is strong! Quickly untangling himself before she could gratefully strangle the life out of him. He made a promise to be back and left her there smiling happily, both hands clasped behind her back.
Owen stood before a crouched over red bestial machine now. The machine resembled a panther, down to the raking claws on its legs, with a large multi-barreled cannon on one shoulder, its feral eyes staring dead at him. " OK what's your function droid?" The hulk stood silent. Owen glanced to the small statured Jawa next to him, then repeated his question. Silence emanated from the hulk. Losing his temper, he reached around and jerked the Jawa up off the ground by the front of its robe, bringing it face to face with him. " Are you trying to unload a bunch a junk on me? What are you trying to pull?" He shook the poor little thing roughly.
" Excuse me sir this mech is fully functional."
Owen turned to see a brown haired young woman with yellowish eyes addressing him.
" Huh?" Was all that Owen managed.
" This is a Battlemover sir. Its not meant to function on its own. It needs a pilot." She stood there smiling looking generally beautiful in her tight jump suit, the front zipper was even slightly undone to show a generous amount of cleavage.
Owen gawked. " Re...Re.. Really?"
She smiled and nodded.
A smaller, younger girl came up along side the first. Her hair a bluish green color. She was dressed in a woman's business suit.
The smaller girl tapped the other's shoulder, who bent down to her. She got closer and in a not quite a whispering tone, Owen could here it quite plainly, said, " Look how he is staring at you. You would think that he had seen you parading around stark naked." They looked over at him and giggled.
Owen gulped and realized he was still holding the struggling Jawa by the collar and decided it was prudent to let the poor thing down. The Jawa scrambled off as soon as its feet hit the ground, but Owen wasn't paying attention. He quickly straightened himself up to his full height. " No, it is just that not many young women come out this way with bandits and all. Wh..wh...What are you doing out here with this bunch of termites," he gestured to the Jawas scurrying around the crawler.
" We're for sale." The taller one replied.
Owen's jaw dropped, " Fo foffofof for sale?"
The older one nodded cheerfully.
Owen would have stood that way, eyes as large as tea saucers, if it was not for a persistent tug at his coat. He turned slowly to see a fairly large red robot that looked somewhat like a spider. It had a large bulbous abdomen that was supported by a small round thorax. Connected to the thorax was four legs, their connecting joints hidden by large armored covers. A spotlight was positioned on the left side of its thorax and opposite was a small protruding cone. The machine apparently had no head, but had one large eye accompanied by two smaller ones on the front of the thorax. A small barrel protruded from it underside between two arms; the hands on the end of the arms were what it was using to tug at Owen. It spoke to him in a high pitched voice.
" Excuse me sir but I overheard you talking about that mech there." The small robot's single large black eye looked up at him. " I think I may be able to help. "
The robot let go of his garment and scooted around him. It continued talking, " I was investigating its circuitry earlier and found that it has a very interesting auto-pilot function identifying itself as J-1." It crawled up on to the back of the battlemover. A small cord extended itself from one of its manipulators. It plugged the cord into an external jack on the machine's neck. " I maybe able to make it function. "
The taller young women in the sporty jump suit looked up at what the robot was doing. " You shouldn't really do that. The J-1 is a battle AI." The red robot continued its work regardless. The tall brunette jumped up the side of the Battlemover. " You should really stop.., " she grabbed at the cord.
" OH! Please be careful Sylvie!" the bluish haired girl jumped after the taller one.
Owen watched helplessly as the red spider-robot fended of the girls with its free manipulator. He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned confusedly toward the source, expecting to see a twelve-foot tall chipmunk with a third eye reciting Homer. But disappointedly all he found was Luke/Goku. " Yeah Luke."
Goku shuffled his feet and looked over at the odd seen taking place to his left.
" Uncle...O..wen, " the words still feeling unfamiliar to him. " I think we should really buy that red haired one down there." Goku pointed back toward where the young red headed schoolgirl droid stood waving enthusiastically.
" Why? It doesn't even now what it does."
" She said that she is a hard worker and besides....," Goku shrugged and simply stated, " you made her cry."
Owen sighed. " I don't care. Droids don......, " before he finished the large red feral Battlemover was moving. Owen turned to watch as it started to stand on its hind legs, which seemed undersized for its bulk. The two girls stumbled around on its back, clutching at each other for support. The battlemover suddenly stood straight, the motion throwing the girls from its back. Owen heard what he thought was the older one's voice yell " Anri! " before they hit the ground, tumbling away from the mech. The red spider robot still had a firm hold though and raised its free manipulator high.
" They're coming to capture us! GET EM D.D.!" the smaller robot's hand pointed toward a small group of Jawas that were coming toward the commotion, ion guns in their tiny hands. It made a mechanical growl in acknowledgment
The Battlemover, D.D., was now drawn up into a humanoid shape; its head sported two bright glowing eyes which made Owen's body shiver. The gattling cannon, now raised over one shoulder, lowered toward the group. The Jawas stood their ground before the machine and raised their jury-rigged ion guns. D.D. fired. Jawas screeched and ran toward the safety of the crawler as bullets rained around them . One Jawa turned to try a small restraining bolt remote on the two robots, but soon gave that up because it remembered that these droids had not been fitted for restraints due to their odd programming nature. The spider-bot laughed maniacally, seemingly drunk with power.
Goku ran over to the two fallen girls. The battlemover clunked off toward the hiding Jawas as Owen turned his back and walked to the last and final droid in line.
Thank God this one is more normal. Well, sort of. Owen now stood before a droid with pinkish hair and a silver-gunmetal type skin. Its chest area clad in what resembled a tight black vest that left its muscular silver stomach uncovered. From the waist down the droid was black. It peered at him through black eyes with silver irises.
" Your function droid? " Owen put on his best command voice. Maybe if he kept stern with this one it would not go out of control on him.
It looked down at Owen as if he were an insect. " I am no droid and how dare you address the new messiah like that..., " it clinched its fist in front of Owen's face.
" HUMAN, " the droid spat out the last word like an insult. " I will crush your race without so much as a thought if you do not show proper respect to me."
Owen stood there stunned as the droid turned away from him to face the sand crawler. " Behold my power! " The droid held its hand out toward the sand crawler and stood there. After about five minutes it turned around back to Owen's position and bowed its head and crossed its arms. " It would seem the new god has problems, " it uttered.
Owen quickly walked off.
***
" He isn't going to buy any of them at this rate, Brother Yellow this is your show!
Do something!" Brother Blue stood up and pounded his hands on the console.
Yellow panicked.
***
The silver-eyed droid suddenly looked up. Its eyes going wide and a smile coming to its lip. " Yes. "
A beam of light came from the heavens and hit the sandcrawler with searing force, exploding in a ball of flame and slag.
Largo laughed insanely.
***
A general shriek went up around the room as the orbital particle beam appeared out of nowhere and fired on the planet, Tatoonie, below. Five hands slammed down on five neural panels with five thuds and the satellite's physical destiny line was removed. Five backs hit five chairs with five sighs. Four eyes stared at one Yellow Brother.
" What in the nine hells did you think you were doing! " Brother Black stepped theatrically from his chair.
" I fixed the problem at hand, " Yellow shrank back from the advancing Brother in the Hawaiian shirt. " You see, now that the trader vehicle is destroyed they have no choice but to take the robots provided, and I made sure all of them contained the Death Star plans.
I just gently pushed events back on track."
" GENTLE PUSH MY ASS!" Brother Black jumped at Yellow. Yellow scrambled out of his chair and started making his way to the door. Black soon over took him and wrestled him to the floor.
Brother Red looked over at Brother Blue, " Things have gotten out of control brother, maybe we should inform Burdull!" The sound of the two brothers struggling in the background seemed to support the idea.
" Perhaps Brother, " Blue nodded over steepled fingers.
" I heard that! I'll go tell her right now," White was out his seat and already heading to the door.
" No wait! " Red and Blue were both out of their chairs, but not fast enough White was already gone.
" Aaaaah Crud, " Blue went over and attempted to pull the two fighting brothers apart, and received a black eye for his effort. Red was slightly more successful after putting Black in a suppression hold.
Blue sat back down in his chair and nursed his left eye. Red let Black go after he promised to be good and Yellow was not to much trouble to get back in his chair.
Red, the only one to go unscathed, looked around at the pathetic remaining brothers. Black sat breathing hard in his chair, his Hawaiian shirt torn open. Yellow sat crying his brilliant yellow robes covered down the front by blood, signs of a savagely beaten nose.
And blue materialized a ice pack to place over his eye.
" Brother White has gone to tell Burdull and here we are fighting like children." A groan came from the injured Brothers. " And you know what that means.." Brother Red's tone was dark and serious, " when Burdull arrives we will be in great peril of loosing our positions and licenses, quite probably reduced to B level." Everyone knew what Red was talking about and the mood became dark, not even Yellow dared sniff back the blood gushing from his nose.
Blue removed the pack from his eye and glared at everyone. " So it would seem our best course of action is to fix events before she gets here. Agreed?" The other brothers nodded their consent.
Black inspected his torn shirt, " Then lets stop talking and get started. " He placed his hand back on his panel. " Now where were we? "
CHAPTER 3
DO YOU SPEAK THE BINARY LANGUAGE OF MOISTURE VAPORATORS?
It was a seen straight from hell. Owen watched the flames of the wreckage illuminate the dust kicked up from the explosion. The silver droid stood there in all its horrific glory, a mechanical devil in front of a flaming backdrop. It still laughed.
Owen sat where he had landed. Something had pushed him to safety when the sand crawler blew, but he was still too dazed to realize what the thing across his lap was.
All he could really do was look at the devilish, laughing droid.
Then it stopped laughing.
Owen wasn't sure, but it seemed the droid was trapped in a freeze frame. It stood there for at least a minute, searching for some answer or reply that would never come.
" Aw, Shoot, " was all it said as it suddenly collapsed into an indian style sitting position and clutched its head in its hands.
Owen was to bleary to be confused. The thing that was on his mind was what was in his lap. He groped the object to get the general idea of its shape. It was soft. Covered in cloth perhaps? And there was two bumps on its surface to his left. A posterior of some sort? And a large silky haired protrusion to the right. Hair on someone's head maybe, that may be important? And two metal protrusions coming from that mass of soft hair. Ears?
Then Owen put two and two together.... A large Womprat with surgically implanted metal cat ears..... and came up with five; Uncle Owen had never so much as seen a stump in his life.
It was when his wife started beating him over the head and yelling about fondling young unconscious girls that he realized that this was no stump.
Fuchikoma looked over the shoulder of the D.D. Battlemover at the line of three individuals facing him. The first one in the line was a black spiky haired, muscular male in a orange and blue martial arts get up; the man's tail made him wonder what was going
on with his visual interpretation circuit. The man looked up curiously at him. The next in line was a pretty brown haired female in a racing suit, the suit part way unzipped to reveal the tops of her breasts; he wondered why he should care about that last detail. She scowled at him in open rage. The third was a young woman with blue green hair that made the cutest little " I'm going to kill you face " he had ever seen; again he wondered when he had gained the ability to discern cuteness.
He continued observing them for a few moments. The dust spread by the explosion rolled passed him, still ludicrously perched on the back of the Battlemover. The flames behind him gave the dust a reddish hue. The three before him continuing their observation as well.
I'd better do something before they jump me and use my parts to clean the gunk from water fountains! He stopped and wondered a moment about where he had acquired the ability to think for himself, but soon turned his thought functions back to the problem at hand. His logic circuits raced for a solution that would get him out of this alive.
Then the answer came.
The three were still looking at him when he produced a handful of dilapidated Posies. " Flowees for the pretty ladies? "
Owen's wife scolded him as he sat there trying to wake the figure collapsed across his lap.
" Owen I don't know what you think your doing, but I have been your faithfu....
* WHAP *...for 20 years.. * WHAP *...FOR TWENTY YEARS!.. * WHAP *...and now I find you molesting young GIRLS! * WHAP * WHAP * WHAP *... Oh God! I'm leaving you for good now! * WHAP * WHAP * WHAP * WHAP * WHAP * "
The broom had hit its mark one to many times for Owen to remember. He quietly turned the girl over as his wife rained blows on his head.
" Oh tired of her rump now I see! " The blows came faster and harder, but Owen's head was as hard as rock.
The red haired droid from before lay on his there unmoving. Owen ran his hand down her body looking for injuries; an enraged screech from behind signaled a renewed onslaught of blows. He was pleased that he found no apparent injuries on the girl/droid who had knocked him out of the way of the explosion. With the possible exception of the metal cat ears that had sprung from her head she seemed in good condition. Owen smiled as her eyes slowly opened.
The red headed girl's eyes focused on Owen's face. " Nuku Nuku save Owen? " Owen nodded. A pained look came across her face. In a weak and dying voice, " Will Uncle Owen buy Nuku Nuku? "
Tears weld up in Owen's eyes. " Yes,.." Owen cleared his tightening throat, " ..Uncle Owen will buy Nuku Nuku."
The girl quickly sat up suddenly and hugged Owen tightly, he gasped as all the air left his lungs.
Nuku Nuku pulled back a moment and looked Owen in the face, " You thought Nuku Nuku was dead didn't you? " Owen nodded, she smiled. " You thought Nuku Nuku was dying painfully and didn't have long to live didn't you? " Owen sighed and smiled. " Nuku Nuku fooled Uncle Owen didn't she?" Owen nodded. Nuku Nuku laughed and renewed here hug, " Nuku Nuku was just kidding. She will work very hard for Uncle Owen and do anything he asks. Forever and ever. "
Owen sighed and lightly hugged her back. He noticed that her cat ears were gone, but that was no big deal. The thing he didn't notice though was the large thump behind him that signified his wife's fainting.
" You wouldn't happen to speak the binary language of moisture
vaporators would you?"
Goku made a mental note never to make the brown haired woman, Sylvie, angry; or any member of the female race for that fact. He stood silently by as the epitome of womanly anger slapped the pathetic looking bunch of posies from the small spider-bot's hand.
" How dare you go messing with something as dangerous as this and not know anything about it! " She fumed as she stalked right up to the battlemover, somehow making it look smaller and more fragile than it was. " I don't know who or what your are but I'm going....." The red spider-bot jerked its hands back in surprise as Sylvie advanced on it.
" I was only trying to help mister Owen, " it shrieked. " I honestly didn't think D.D. would be hostile." The robot started shrinking back.
" Then why did you tell it to fire on the little people. " This was from the little blue and green haired girl, Anri. She advanced on the battlemover too, her mighty little fists clutched at her side.
" Well I...... I was trying to help mister Owen. " The girls didn't stop and they definitely were not taking that as an excuse. " RUN D.D.! "
The battlemover moved down to all fours, bringing the robot's one large eye an inch from Sylvie's. She swung, but the battlemover had already started backing away quickly, so she did nothing but upset her balance and go tumbling forward. Anri caught her before she went to far.
" Come back here you bastard! You caused this mess! " Sylvie ran off into the dust and smoke after him, Anri close on her heels. Goku just watched.
Then something snapped in his mind. UNCLE OWEN! Goku ran off toward where he thought Owen had last been. All he found when he got there thought was a silver and black " droid " sitting lotus style, head down, in deep concentration.
Goku bent over and got a good look at its face. Its eyes were closed tight in concentration.
" Excuse me...." Goku waited for an answer. One of the droids eyes arched open and peered at him. Goku shrank back a bit from its black and silver irised eyes.
" Yeesssss, " the droid said impatiently.
" I was wondering," Goku rubbed the back of his neck and grinned. " Have seen a fairly old man? " The droid was silent. Goku thought a bit, " You know thinning hair.." Goku gestured to his hair, " sort of sagging in the middle, " Goku indicated his stomach, " wearing some worn out farming clothes." He finished with a big stupid disarming grin.
The droid's arm shot out to his side, the finger jutting out like some immovable iron arrow. " He is over there. " A certain measure of tolerance held in its voice.
Goku gave a big smile and jogged off in the direction the droid had pointed, chuckling merrily. " Thanks, " he called back and waved. The droid sat unmoving and indifferent.
" Owen, UNCLE OWEN....* Urk *, " Goku tripped over an object lying on the ground.
Goku scrambled over to the shape he had tripped over. " Uncle Owen? "
He cradled the shape in his arms. " Uncle Owen can you hear me? Are you all right? Please speak to me. "
" Uuuuhhh.. Luke? I'm over here. "
Goku turned his head to see Owen sitting on the dusty ground with the red haired schoolgirl hugging him.
" But if your over there.....then who is this? " In his arms was that one woman who he assumed was Uncle Owen's spouse; therefore addressed as " Aunt. " Goku tried desperately to recall her name.
" Uhhh...Owen what is " Aunt's " name? "
" How should I know, " Owen shrugged," I have been married to her so long that she usually responds to HEY YOU, HONEY or occasionally DEAR. "
Goku turned back to his supposed Aunt and shook her, " HEY YOU wake up."
Aunt " Hey You's " eyes fluttered open and stared up at Goku's relieved visage.
" Luke, " she uttered in a low weak tone, " avenge me. " Her hand shakily reached up and caressed his face.
" Destroy those responsible for my condition, " her face tightened in rage and she grabbed the color of Goku's fighting uniform, " crush their miserable souls. "
" Who did this to you ? Who?! " Goku looked down into the enraged visage of the aunt.
" That miserable bastard over their! " Aunt " Hey you " jerked straight up out of his arms and pointed at Owen. Before Owen could react though she had grabbed the nearest piece of slagged metal and was advancing on him with it.
" I will teach you to cheat on me you low life, no good excuse of a husband you." A dizzy and panic-stricken Owen scrambled on all fours away from the searing, metal wielding wrath of his spouse.
" B.bbbbbb..But you don't understand I was..." the metal landed two feet from the scrambling man's head, leaving a small crater the size of a car tire. Owen scrambled to his feet and broke into a full run, aunt " Hey you " close behind screaming curses to chill the devil's soul.
Goku was suddenly glomped. " Nuku Nuku love Luke! " The air rushed out of Goku's lungs at the bone-crushing hug of the schoolgirl.
Aunt came back hauling an unconscious Owen, a large black and blue lump forming on his forehead. The dust was finally clearing and resettling, letting the hot Tatoonie sun through. It gave Aunt a ugly demonic look as she looked at Goku still sitting where he had picked her up.
" So you have taken up with the little harlot too. " Aunt dropped Owen and started pounding the large slagged piece of metal into her other hand, like a thug with a baseball bat.
" What's a harlot? " Nuku Nuku let go of Goku and looked confusedly at aunt.
Goku stood up and shrugged, " I don't know. What is a " harlot " aunt? "
Aunt " Hey you " looked surprised then smiled, " she is a harlot, " she pointed at Nuku Nuku.
" I'm a harlot, " Nuku Nuku laughed and jumped up and down clapping her hands. She turned to Goku and glomped him.
Goku laughed and clapped his hand to the back of his neck, " I guess you are."
He stopped when he saw Aunt coming at him with the makeshift club, open anger and rage showing on her face. Goku closed his eyes and waited for the brutal impact of the club.
It never came. Goku felt two heavy claw like hands place themselves on his shoulders and spin him around. He opened his eyes to see Sylvie rushing straight at him with a murderous look on her face.
" Save me boss! She's gone crazy," the high pitched tone of the spider-bot pleaded. The battlemover had placed Goku between Sylvie and it.
" Get away from it! I'm going to smash that thing into pieces!" Sylvie hefted a steel pipe into position. The battlemover huddled in fear behind Goku. Goku raised an arm to deflect the blow.
" Nuku Nuku won't let you hurt Luke! " The red headed droid placed itself in Sylvie's path. Sylvie skidded to a stop, the pipe coming down slightly from the sudden halt.
Nuku Nuku wasted no time in grabbing it. Once in her position she bent it in half and threw it a few miles out of sight with her left hand. Sylvie's eyes were as large as small Buick's, needless to say she backed away from the red head.
The battlemover pushed Goku to the side and placed itself squarely behind the red head, the spider-bot still firmly placed on its right shoulder.
" Yeah! We won't let you hurt Luke either. " The little robot raised its fist into the air and shook it menacingly. " So watch yourself. I wouldn't want to hurt that pretty hide of yours. " The battlemover growled.
Sylvie stood there unable to move. The tension in the air was nearly visible. Anri came up silently beside Goku and nudged him in the ribs. He looked down at the small statured girl.
She winked and gave him a smile, " You had better do something Luke. "
Goku looked back at the two groups rounding off. Sylvie looked as if she was going to fight Nuku Nuku to get to the red robots, though it seemed that she didn't cherish this thought. And it seemed that Nuku Nuku was set on defending Luke, even if that meant knocking the brown haired girl before her into next Tuesday. The spider-bot and D.D looked fierce, but they were keeping the red head between them and the brunet.
Goku jogged up and placed himself between Nuku Nuku and Sylvie. " Oh, You misunderstood Nuku Nuku. Sylvie, " he gestured to the girl behind him with his thumb, " wasn't going to hurt me, she was going to hurt him, " he pointed over her shoulder to the large robot. " For causing this entire mess. "
" I did not start this mess, " the red bot objected, shaking its fist at Goku. " That was an orbital blast. This mech does not have that capability. " The robot turned an accusing finger at Sylvie, " She's just crazy that's all. "
Sylvie tried to jump over Goku's shoulder at the small spider-bot. " I'm not crazy! " Goku turned and restrained her with an arm around her waist. " He fired on the little people with out provocation. " She struggled wildly against Goku's hold. " That thing he is toying around with is dangerous! "
" About as dangerous as psycho brown haired ladies, " arrogant smuggness dripped heavily from the statement. A metallic thumb sent the spider-bot tumbling to the ground. Everyone turned to Anri standing beside the battlemover with the club that aunt had been using.
" What, " she looked at them in return. " I didn't like its tone. "
Sylvie stopped struggling and Goku allowed her to push away from him. Now standing by herself, she turned and bowed to him and Nuku Nuku. " I'm sorry for whatever inconvenience I caused you, but I meant Luke no harm "
Nuku Nuku smiled and glomped Sylvie, " Its okay, Nuku Nuku forgive Sylvie."
Sylvie hugged her back and looked over at Goku. He just shrugged.
" This is all very touching, but does anyone care that there may be another orbital strike at anytime now. " The group looked over at the disgruntled spider-bot that had rejoined them." I don't care about you guys, but I don't want to end up like that. " The dust had cleared out a great deal by now and everyone could see the wreckage of the sand crawler that the bot was pointing at.
" There will not be another strike. " All eyes turned to the gray and black figure that walked slowly toward them. " The source has disappeared. "
" Don't pretend your innocent Largo! " Anri stomped toward him, " I know you caused it just like you did back in Mega-Tokyo. " Largo casually looked up at Anri.
" So you are here Anri.....How interesting." His cold eyes looked the little girl over. " But if your looking to stop me from achieving my destiny, " Largo flexed his inorganic muscles, " I am afraid I will have to destroy you. " Largo slowly raised his hand toward Anri.
" LUKE! " Uncle Owen came out from behind D.D. " Luke if your taking on the responsibility of these droids your going to have to get them to act decently. " The lump on his forehead had swollen to encompass his eye. " And you can't have them fighting. "
" You can not talk to me like that....," Largo thumped his chest, " I am the new...."
" LUKE!" Owen stared straight at Goku.
Goku turned stiffly to Largo. " Bad droid! Bad! " He waggled a finger at the droid.
" YOU DARE! " Largo rushed Goku.
CHAPTER 4
SIX DROIDS AND A MONKEY
Largo sat nursing a broken elbow, giving Goku the evil " I'm going to crush you into the matter density of neutronium " eye. The tailed human had easily grabbed his punch and sent him jerking into the air with enough force to snap the myomers and infrastructure of the punching arm.
Largo grudgingly admitted that the human was strong and that he had underestimated him, but that was all Largo was going to admit. Oh how the Boomers back home would laugh if they had saw their messiah take such a beating from....a......aaa...monkey! LITERALLY! The fires of rage roared up in Largo's body.
He stood up and clinched his good fist before him and glared at the group gathered in the small, greasy maintenance bay of the farm dwelling. The entire gathering turned questioning eyes toward him.
" Something wrong droid? " The eyes of Uncle Owen drilled holes in him. " Will Luke here have to give you another going over? "
Largo gulped, his clinched fist feeling much weaker and not so bold. He sat back down in his spot at the table. Eyes closed shut in concentration Largo counted backward from 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000, the flames of his rage gradually subsided.
" No sir, " Largo strained, " Largo be good droid."
" Make sure you are. " Owen critical gaze left Largo.
I must be patient and bide my time, when the moment comes they will all pay for their arrogance. Yes, Largo. An evil smile touched his lips. Climb the latter Largo. Get into their good graces and then..... Largo's eyes snapped open and his smile turned into an open grin of malice. " THEY WILL ALL SUFFER! "
Goku tried his best not to be disturbed by the droid's , the one addressed as Largo, insane laughing. But God, it " was " disturbing. He glanced at the maniacal droid form the corner of his eye. Owen caught this and took initiative.
" LARGO! SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP BEFORE I HAVE LUKE TAKE A WRENCH TO YOU! " Largo jerked out of his laughing fit like he had suddenly been hit by a semi just shot out a linear cannon at the speed of light. He sat down.
" Now Luke these droids are you responsibility, " Uncle Owen went into his best sage and wise speaking voice. " So it is therefore your duty to clean and repair them before tomorrow, You got that. " Goku acknowledged with a nod. Owen rose and walked toward the door. Then as if something else had suddenly come to his mind he turned back to face Goku.
" I want these droids working on the south ridge vaporators by sunup tomorrow." Goku nodded, this though was purely an automatic function because he had not picked up anything Owen had said in the last hour.
Owen had turned to leave again then turned back. " And stay away from Ben Kenobi's place. " Goku's eyes shot up.
" Who? "
Owen looked sternly at Goku. " You know Ben Kenobi. "
" Who? "
Owen looked exasperated. " The powerful Jedi master that controls the most powerful force in the universe." Owen faked casting a spell. Goku cocked an eyebrow at Owen, but the mention of the " powerful Jedi master " had caught his interest.
Owen clapped a hand to his forehead, " God forbid he might try to train you or
something. " Owen had turned again and was opening the door to leave and as such did not see Goku jump up like a shot with an eager and excited look on his face. " So don't go southeast of here, about sixty miles or so, for any reason. " Owen was through the door , but poked his head back through to give him a critical look, " and get these droids cleaned now and out on the south ridge by tomorrow. " The door slammed.
Goku unable to contain himself, did a back flip and started prancing around like an idiot, laughing merrily. He was going to get some new training, finally something he understood; a purpose in his suddenly screwed up life. Sylvie and Anri sweat dropped and Nuku just laughed and clapped at Goku's happy antics, Largo sat sullen plotting out his plans of action. Owen poked his head back in all this stopped. Goku unceremoniously landed on his butt.
" And hurry up dinner will be soon, " with that Owen withdrew his head. The energy drained from Goku and he thumped over flat on his back. The thought of vegetable mash was not very pleasing, his saiyan stomach growled.
" Is Luke OK? " Nuku Nuku positioned her face over his.
" Yes, and call me Goku please," he smiled besides his complete lack of energy to do so. He propped himself up with his arms and looked at the group of droids. " Does anyone here know what I'm supposed to do? "
" I believe Uncle Owen told you to check in on our maintenance needs, " the small red spider bot that called itself " Fuchikoma 56 " was still perched on " D.D. " the battlemover. Its scratched its head with one of its small mechanical hands. " I am glad to report though that both me and D.D. are functioning at nominal levels, in my case more so, but due to the desert environment outside we would function better after a filter change and bath, " then the small bot's tone went conniving, " and a hot coat of wax would be very nice."
" How I'm I supposed to do that? " Goku stood up and looked around the greasy little workshop. " I'm not a mechanic."
" Maybe this will help, " the brown haired woman produced a large book titled
Droid mechanics and you. " I found it over there on the shelf. " She gestured behind her to a shelf of old torn books tucked in the corner over a workbench.
Goku took the book and flipped through the pages. After finding a page that looked satisfactory he read aloud. " Chapter 1 Cleaning your droid, " he ran his finger down the page. " To prevent grim and dirt deposits from effecting droid performance and functions a regular oil bath should be given. " He looked at a small cartoon located to the side of the paragraph. The cartoon depicted a droid, that looked nothing like the ones he currently had, with a big stupid grin on its face being dipped in a tub of oil, a small speech balloon read
" This oil bath will fill so good. " He returned to the paragraph, the next line simply read,
" a clean droid is a happy droid. " Goku looked up from the book and scanned the dim little cramped room. A minimum of searching turned up a vat of black goo.
Goku pointed toward the tub and scratched his head. " I think I'm supposed to stick you all in there. "
" What!? " " Nuku Nuku can't go in there! " came a multitude of disgusted comments.
" Don't look at me! I just said what the book said. " Goku shrank back from the girl droid's protests, hands coming up defensively.
Anri stepped forward from her spot on a crate in the far corner of the room, she stepped lively as to not get her business dress oily; it should be noted that she had failed at this because everything had grim on it. " We just need an ordinary bath, " she hooked an arm around Sylvie and offered one to Nuku Nuku. She smiled at Goku, could you please direct us to it. "
Goku smiled back, he could use a bath himself. " I don't know were the bath is, but I saw an old barrel behind the house that I could roll around and take the top off of. " He looked back at Fuchikoma, D.D., and Largo. Goku became sullen, " But I've got to get them cleaned up first. "
" Oh.. then you stay here and get that done I'm sure we can find it ourselves, " she led the other female droids toward the door, " anyway you don't want us dirty when you need us right? " They left through the door.
There was something about that last statement that struck Goku as odd, but if there was anything weird about it he could not pin it down. He instead turned his attention to the project at hand. He went around to the oil bath and located what looked like a control pad. I'm supposed to heat this stuff up first....lets see. He jammed at the keypad with his finger.
" Could one of you come over and give me a hand with this. "
D.D., with Fuchikoma still on its back, tromped over behind Goku. The battlemover moved down to were the spider-bot could reach the panel.
After a bit of examination the spider-bot spoke, " Sorry boss, butt this thing has no interface I can use and hell its not even written in any language that I know. "
Goku contemplated the oil vat and looked over at the brooding Largo. Largo was still in his same position, his artificial features in a look of pure concentration.
Seeing that Largo was not going to offer any help Goku took matters into his own hands. Raising a hand to point at the oil bath Goku concentrated. A ball of chi formed and hit the oil. The resulting impact of the chi sent oil splashing across the far wall of the now even greaser garage. Largo covered in slick goo looked up from his place and stared at a very embarrassed Goku.
At least the oils hot now. He kneeled down so that he could reach the surface of the much-depleted oil. Dipping a finger in he smiled. A good roiling boil made for a great hot bath.
" Its just right, " he clapped D.D. on the back, sending the stooping battlemover into the boiling oil, " everyone into the tub. " The two bots thrashed around wildly in the vat.
Goku jumped over the vat toward Largo. Largo's eyes narrowed. " Your not sticking me in there. " He raised a hand, preparing to blast Goku.
" Now, Now, Largo you shouldn't avoid baths. There fun. " Before a shocked Largo could react Goku had grabbed that uplifted arm and used it to fling him into the vat with an up turned battlemover and a scrambling spiderbot. Largo sat up cross-legged and spat out a mouth full of the hot oil.
" Now lets get behind those ears. " Goku reached down and started giving Largo a vigorous scrub with a long handled wire brush.
YOU WILL PAY GOKU! JUST YOU WAIT! I WILL MAKE YOU SUFFER! Open murder played across Largo's features as he sat and endured the scrubbing.
***
Sylvie stood outside of the Skywalker family compound looking up at the starry sky. There had not been views like this back in Mega-Tokyo, the city lights blocked out the night sky. With nothing but the compound's lights to interfere, the night sky expanded far beyond the horizon. She followed the stars' slow march across the sky.
A shadow came from out of the darkness and stood beside her. " The bath is not over there........Sylvie. " The last word came out unsure, as if that may have not been the right name or she had trouble believing it was.
They were standing well out of reach of the little light that found its way through the compound entrance, but Sylvie did not need light to recognize the voice.
" It has been a while since you've used my name, " she turned her head toward the other shadow, " Anri. "
Silence followed. Then Anri spoke. " When Priss gave me the disk to repair my systems, she told me you were killed by the Knight Sabers to stop the D.D.'s neutron bomb form exploding, and that she had received the disk from you as your last legacy to me. I held a lot of hate for the human race and especially those who had taken you away from me." She paused then added, " It was only later that I found out she was the one that had killed you and it hurt her as much as it hurt me....she drove the knife I stabbed her with deeper into herself as she embraced me in grief. " A slight sniffle came from Anri as she held back tears. " I keep guessing that this is some dream and at any moment you'll turn out to be a ghost that will fade away and leave me alone again. " The shadow became silent and still for a moment. " That is why I have hesitated to call you Sylvie and have kept my distance. Separation hurts so much. " She suddenly turned and embraced Sylvie, her sobs soaked the front of her jump suit. Burying her head in Sylvie's chest a muffled voice pleaded, " Don't leave again Sylvie, P..pp.lease promise me you'll never fade away. I couldn't live through a second time. "
Slyvie folded her arms around Anri and made an effort to soothe her weeping. A long time followed when the two dark shapes in the night were one, until a third approached.
" Nuku Nuku could not find a bath that way."
Anri stopped crying and separated herself from Sylvie.
" Then we will just have to make do with something else, " Anri made one last sniff and started toward the glowing archway of the Skywalker compound. Sylvie followed, trying to pick the warm, wet jumpsuit cloth off her skin. Anri had always been over emotional, not to mention her own mixed feelings about the current predicament. I'm I really dead or is it " ME " whose living this dream. If it was a dream she really did not want to wake up.
Nuku Nuku fell in step behind Sylvie. Anri led them down into the compound and around to the courtyard. Once in the courtyard she turned to the others.
" I found the kitchen while I was looking for the bath down here. " She entered a small niche in the circular courtyard. Inside the niche was a simple, crowded kitchen which sported a small stove, a fairly sizable refrigerator, a few plain white cupboards, and a small circular table with four chairs. A horrid little machine that smelled of rotting plant life sat maliciously on the counter.
Anri rummaged in a cabinet and produced a banged up copper kettle. She filled it with water from a thermos in the refrigerator and set on the stove.
Sylvie realized what Anri was doing and went to the lavatory she had found earlier. Upon inspecting it she had found only a basin full of stale water and a toilet which consisted of a hole in the ground. But it did, for some reason, have towels and wash clothes in abundance.
When Sylvie returned with the linens, the water was already at a pleasant temperature. Anri had stripped off her grimy business suit and laid it folded neatly on the table. Nuku Nuku was peeling out off her cloths as she entered.
" I didn't think we would find a full fledged bath, " Sylvie laid the pile of wash cloths on the table and fully unzipped her jumpsuit and started removing it, " given that they live in a desert and all, a bath would be a waste of precious water. " She stepped out of the crumpled pile of her biking outfit.
" That still doesn't excuse them from having a sauna, " Anri removed the kettle from the stove burner and placed on the cabinet. " It wouldn't hurt them to keep clean. " She took a cloth from the table and poured water from the kettle onto it. " I had to disable my sense of smell because of those Jawas, and I would think that the Skywalker's would smell the same way too. "
Sylvie fully understood what Anri meant. The smell of the little filthy creatures had almost made her wretch, even though BU-33S Sexaroids were not built with the function, and they had strongly discouraged her from reconnecting her sense of smell since. It was just lucky for her that the little things did not seem fit to use their own machines for their intended purposes. She gave an open sigh as she took her own cloth and poured warm water onto it.
" Even though they seem like nice people, " she started running the cloth up and down her arm, it felt nice. " I just don't like the idea of being a slave again. It seems like our destiny doesn't it? "
" Yes, " Anri looked up from running the cloth between her toes, " at least Luke....or Goku, doesn't seem at all like that nasty Kaufman. "
Sylvie's harem days came flooding back to her, " I hope not.....but don't you have a feeling that we are some how connected to him. " Her and Anri's eyes met.
" I have the feeling too, like destiny is conspiring to keep us with him. "
Sylvie leaned back on the table for support, " I haven't thought of running away once, even though it seems easy enough. "
Anri nodded in agreement, " I haven't either. " She returned to cleaning her toes, tsking at a roughly broken toenail. " Strange, because so far they have let us run free around the premises without so much as a restraining word. "
" Nuku Nuku feel the same way, " she was licking the length of her forearm. Sylvie
handed her a warm wash cloth, Nuku Nuku took it and after puzzling over it began using it. She continued, a blush of embarrassment on her face. " I feel that I belong to him and that I should stay by him and do what he wants. "
Sylvie listened and fully agreed with what she was saying. Looking at the nude female, which she assumed was sexaroid, she tried to imagine what kind of master had requested a custom made female with slightly feline traits. What had her life had been up to this moment. Which brought about an interesting question in her mind.
" How did you die? " The question was directed at Nuku Nuku, but it took the " Cat Girl " a moment to realize she was being addressed. Nuku Nuku laughed and smiled innocently.
" I'm not dead. I'm asleep dreaming until Ryunosuke and Papa-san send a rocket to pick Nuku Nuku up. " She opened her eyes, they looked sad, " since Eimi went to sleep and wouldn't wake up, Nuku Nuku got bored and sleepy. " She immediately perked up though,
" but now I'm dreaming about Luke, Anri, Sylvie, and Uncle Owen who are all nice to Nuku Nuku. " She returned to happily washing herself, smiling like nothing was wrong in the world, where-ever that might be.
Owen yawned and stretched while he stumbled down the dark compound hall. An itch under his right armpit demanded all his attention, which led him to promptly trip over a piece of PCB pipe running along the floor. Note to self, get night-lights. He hoisted himself up and headed toward the small light that marked the kitchen's entrance.
Here it was another night and the munchies were upon Owen, forcing him to make the treacherous journey to the family's small kitchen. Driven forward by the pleading of his stomach, though, Owen would make it at any cost.
The lights already on. Luke did not usually make it to the kitchen before him, but today had been full of abnormalities.
" Hey Luke did you save some of thosssssss........Hello? "
Owen did not know what to exactly think of the scene before him, maybe he had wandered into one of those strange dreams that old sexually nonactive men had; but then again if it was one of those there would have been five hundred pounds of sugar and blasting caps, also it would not be taking place in his kitchen.
The female droids that had came into Luke's ownership, earlier that day, stood there in all their glory rubbing themselves down with white linen cloths. This dream isn't so bad.
" Hello Uncle Owen what are you doing up so late? " This came from the tall brunet who was leaning against the kitchen's single small table.
" I..I....IIIII was going to g gg ggget some milk. " He stiffly wobbled over to the refrigerator and took out a carton of milk. Nuku Nuku glomped him.
" Uncle Owen! " The red head laughed as she hugged him. Milk went splashing everywhere from the crushed carton in Owen's right hand.
The firm reality of the droid made him realize that this was not a dream and in fact was perfectly real. His mouth gaped and his eyes rolled back in his head, for he was sure he was heading for a heart attack.
" Uncle Owen? " Nuku Nuku looked at Owen's face. " Are you OK? " Anri and Sylvie about broke out in laughter, but thankfully they stanched it by pretending to wash their face.
" Oh I see everyone is already here , " Luke's head came down from the top of the kitchen's arched, courtyard entrance.
" Luke! " Shouted Nuku Nuku.
" Hey Uncle Owen didn't think you would be up. " The spiky haired boy flipped easily from the top of the archway onto his feet.
" I'm glad you had the same idea. " He made for the kettle while taking off his bright, orange Gi.
" I found the barrel, " he took the kettle and poured a bit of water on his palm and mumbled something about it being too cold. " But when I tried to pick it up to bring it around the compound it kept moving away from me and making odd beeping sounds. " He placed the kettle back on the stove and turned the knob on high. " When I finally caught it and opened up the top it was full of wires and electronics. " He finished taking of his cloths.
" That's when I realized that the large walking garbage can was a droid. " He looked over at Owen. " Sorry about that. "
For Luke's sake Owen had separated himself from Nuku Nuku, with many an apology and an assurance that he did like her a lot, and closed his gaping maw before his tongue dried up and fell out to feed some poor hapless desert rat.
" Think nothing of it Luke. It was as good as spare parts anyway. " Owen took a towel off the table to sop up some of the spilled milk.
" Master Luke? " Sylvie approached Goku, handing him a wash cloth.
" Goku. " He kicked away his piled up clothes.
" I mean Master Goku. "
He turned and smiled, " You don't need to call me master. "
" Uhhhhh...Ohhh Yes, will you be going to bed soon after you wash. "
Goku looked over his shoulder at Sylvie, " That was the plan. "
Sylvie turned to Anri, " I will take the first shift Anri, you take the second and Nuku Nuku may take the third. " Anri nodded and turned to take a towel to dry off. The Cat Girl just gave Sylvie a confused look.
Owen's eyes went wide at the last statement. Shifts? What does that mean? The suspected truth hit him like a sledgehammer. He had wondered at Luke's newfound casual nudity. But THIS! Luke beat him to the punch though.
" What about D.D., Fuchikoma, and Largo, " Goku juggled the wash cloth. A soggy thump was produced when Owen fell over on his butt in shock.
Sylvie and Anri's faces became shocked. Nuku Nuku was to confused to ask what was going on.
" I don't see why you would want to guard my room, but I think it would be easier if you all took turns. " Goku shrugged, " I'm fully capable of taking care of myself, but if that is what droids are for I won't complain. " General sighs of relief came from everywhere, except from Nuku Nuku who was still trying to figure out what everyone was talking about.
The kettle whistled as the water in it boiled. Goku turned around and took it off the burner and turned off the stove. Taking the wash cloth Sylvie had given him, he poured a generous amount of steaming water on it and started scrubbing.
Aunt stumbled through the kitchen door rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
" I heard you two banging around in here and.......," her eyes went wide when she finally saw what was going on. Owen had never believed the human visage could twist in rage like that, but now he knew.
" Wwwhat DOooo Youu Think you're Do.. Doing! " she stalked forward. " I knew you were up to no good when you bought these droids." She raised a hand to slap Owen, who in turn started backpedaling on all fours to get away from her.
" One moment Aunt, " Sylvie moved into her path and stared her straight in the face.
Here it comes now. Owen was pained to see the young girl about to get slapped, but he would not dare risk his wife's wrath; men who did that around here had a nasty habit of waking up dead in the morning.
Owen, though, was instead surprised to see his wife slump over unconscious before she acted. As he watched in amazement Sylvie gently guided her to the ground.
" H.h.h.h.h.how did you do that, " Owen barely got out before the younger female droid looked him straight in the eye and sent him peacefully into oblivion.
" What did you do? " Goku started from his spot by the counter, torn between checking on Owen or Aunt first.
Sylvie placed a hand on his chest and gently pushed him back to the counter.
" They will be just fine, " she assured him and backed away to sit on the table.
Goku gave her a puzzled look but kept his place.
" Since you are our master Goku I am privileged to tell you that I believe we do not belong here. " She looked over at Anri, who nodded back. Nuku Nuku kneeled next to Owen trying to wake him up.
" It seems that me, Anri, and..." she gestured at the red haired droid, " have memories of dying, and in some cases memories of each other dying. " Goku stood quietly and listened.
" Anri, Largo, D.D. and I all come from the same...." she looked at the ceiling as if it would give her the proper term, " place, which I think is far removed from here. I have no idea where Nuku Nuku comes from. " She looked at Goku. Goku was looking back, his face blank. " But as far as me and Anri go we remember dying before we came here. " She looked at Goku's expression. " Are you catching any of this? "
" Yes, I thought I was the only one who didn't quite belong here. " He smiled and shrugged, " I'm new here myself and thought all this was normal. "
" You mean you died too and ended up here too? " Anri asked.
" Shucks no, I rode here on a dragon. "
Anri and Sylvie just stared.
" I couldn't understand why Shen Long brought me here until Owen mentioned Master Kenobi, " he clapped his hands together. " Now I think I'm meant to train with this great master and become stronger. "
" Then why don't you just go and meet him if that's why your here? " Sylvie had pulled one of the kitchen chairs around to sit in and Anri resumed Owen's attempt to clean up the spilled milk.
" Funny you should ask that, " Goku sat down on the floor cross legged. " I don't know why. It seems like I'm waiting on something to happen first, like destiny is trying to nudge me onto a certain path. "
Nuku Nuku jumped over Anri and joined Goku on the floor. She plopped down beside him and snuggled up to him. He laid an arm gently over her.
" We were talking about that earlier and each of us has a similar feeling, but it is primarily an attachment to you. I don't know about the others, but it seems we are destined to serve you." Sylvie leaned over in a thinker's pose. Anri walked by and wrung her towel out in the sink.
" Serve me? " Goku looked genuinely confused.
" Up until a little bit before our deaths we were slaves to a man named Kaufman, part of a harem of sexaroids he kept. So we naturally assume that we are to fulfill the same purpose to you here."
" You were slaves, " it was more of a surprised statement than a question.
Sylvie shook her head, " and it seems we are again. "
The statement confused Goku and it showed plainly on his face.
" No, your all free as far as I know. " Goku looked around at all of them. " I wouldn't dream of making you slaves. "
Sylvie's eyes brightened and met his, " you mean it. "
Goku scratched his neck and laughed, " of course I do. "
Sylvie sprang from her chair and hugged Goku hard around the neck, Anri took the other side. He blushed madly not knowing what he did to make them cry.
CHAPTER 5
THE GREAT TATOONIE ROAD TRIP.
Goku jumped out of bed the next morning feeling fresh and revitalized. That was until his stomach growled and hit him with two days of insufficient nourishment. He stumbled and ended up slamming his face into the floor.
" Steady Goku you must draw on what inner strength I have to survive this ordeal, " he slowly clawed his way toward his cloths piled on a small study chair.
An obstacle. Anri laid huddled on the floor in between him and the chair, the blanket he had found for her last night draped over her form like a formidable mountain.
The girls had insisted on sleeping in his, Luke's, room the night before rather than in the droid garage with Largo, Fuchikoma, and D.D.; it seemed that Sylvie and Anri did not trust Largo and D.D. just gave them the creeps. So, after assisting him with putting Owen and Aunt to bed, he had helped them to make pallets on the bedroom floor. This had proven a big mistake.
He gathered his resolve and made his way around her, trying his best to not wake the sleeping girl up..
Behold another obstacle. Sylvie lay not to far from Anri, a hand out stretched to hold Anri's, conveniently forming an impasse. The chair seemed farther then it had from the bed.
But Goku had not survived countless battles with world destroying monsters to be stopped here. He crawled on.
Coming around Sylvie's sleeping form Goku found one last obstacle. Nuku Nuku was curled up like a content cat, including the purring, right in front of the chair. There was only one course of action left.
Goku slammed his head into the hard packed linoleum floor a few times to gather strength and started the long arduous task of standing up.
He fist pushed himself up with his arms. Then he placed his right foot under him and, with a titanic effort that would have made the gods weep with envy, balanced and brought forward his left foot. A great thing had been accomplished, Goku was in a crouching position on both feet. But that was not all he would accomplish! Now he extended his legs and like two Atlases bore up the wait of his mighty torso, which rivaled the weight of the heavens. He was standing!
Then he lightly stepped over the sleeping read head, grabbed his cloths, and left through the door; closing it quietly behind as to not wake the girls.
Once outside the door his steps dragged like he was slogging through neurtronium mud. Hunger gnawed at his insides like the Midgar Serpent.
A faint trail of light marked out the kitchen at the far end of the hall. That was no solace to Goku though. Because beyond that arched doorway awaited him no more than a bowl vegetable mash pureed beyond recognition. His steps became heavier.
Rounding the corner to the kitchen Goku found a very happy looking Owen sitting at the small table and a smiling Aunt shoveling what looked like rag weed stalks into that poor, goulish blender.
" Good morning Luke, " they both seemed to say in unison.
Goku limply smiled back, " Good morning. " He plopped down in the nearest chair. The two seemed awfully happy this morning for some reason, seeing that Aunt had just last night seemed on verge of murdering him. What had Sylvie and Anri done?
" Are those droids all set to go out on the south ridge this morning. "
" Huuuh...."
" Good! Just don't go plaguing that all-powerful Jedi Master that lives just south east of here about sixty miles or so. Hell, " Owen took a map from under the table, " I would prefer that you went nowhere near these coordinates. " He stuffed the map away when Aunt scooted two bowls of vegetable mash across the table in front of them. He started digging in like it was actually nourishing.
Goku turned his eyes down to his own bowl of mush. Its surface was a smooth forest green mixed with a trace of yellow. A bubble broke the surface, which drifted slowly to the side of the bowl. There the bubble sat. It popped, the last remaining call for help from the poor liquefied vegie.
Goku, sickened at the sight, slid away from his chair and toward the courtyard,
" Excuse me Aunt, but.." his stomach growled for all to hear, " ....I I I I IIIII'm not hungry. "
" Well if your headed for the garage take this. " Owen tossed a small device about the size of a calculator to him.
Goku looked back questioning.
" Its an auto-nav mapper I found under my bed. " He grabbed Goku's bowl of mush and started eating, " I marked out the precise location of Kenobi's place so that you would not mistakenly run into it. Make sure he doesn't catch you and teach you anything OK. "
" Uh...Sure. "
" Good, well off with you now. I want those droids out on the south ridge by the time I finish breakfast. " Owen waved him off and started back to the more important task of filling his stomach.
Largo sat at the same table, in the same position, and in the exact same mood as last night. He was persistent soul and would not easily give in to the pressures of time. His eyes only lifted when the door to the tiny shop opened.
In stepped a slender, brunet sexaroid swathed in what looked like Arabian desert garb. She scanned the room immediately to the left and right of the door and stepped in.
" I see you have decided to change our dressing habits puppet. " Largo twisted his face into a sneer, " Enjoy yourself last night? "
The figure jumped back, the make shift hood fell back from Sylvie's head. She backed toward the door and put herself up against it.
" Nothing happened last night. "
" I see. Well, I wouldn't want a failed excuse for a boomer sleeping next to me any way. " Her right hand absently clutched at the cloth over her breast. Largo's sneer changed to a devious small and he pressed on.
" Now, why don't you make something useful of yourself and join me. If you can't function in your given capacity I'm sure I can find other ways to use you. " The frame of the female shook, out of rage or fear he did not know or care.
" You bastard! I know how you used us and I know what you did to Anri, " She pulled out a length of steel bar she had concealed under the loose garments, the point sharpened so that it could be driven into the ground. " I have come to make sure that you never, NEVER, do it again. "
" Mere drivel, you were meant to be used and I used you, " Largo lowered his head, " Hrmmph....to think that a doll would stand up to a messiah like this. " A single cold black eye peered at her, the stake shook in her trembling hands. " I would be careful, God may strike you down. "
" SHUT UP! " Sylvie charged, the stake in both hands above her head was poised to run him through.
Largo was up on his feet a split second before the stake went stabbing into the ground at his feet. With a quick jerk of his wrist he knocked her hands from the bar. Following up immediately he grabbed her left harm and heaved her up to look him in the face. Largo's gaze penetrated deep into her fear filled eyes. A gasp escaped her lips.
" You truly are pathetic, " Largo shook his head in mock shame. " You really should have joined me, but what would I do with scrap. " His other hand came up and pressed into her chest, she grunted.
" You wouldn't dare Goku would pull you apart, " even though she was obviously scared, her tone still held courage.
Largo pressed his hand harder into her sternum, a muffled chink signified the opening of the small gun in his palm. " Not if I'm not here when he finds your corpse. "
" Why wouldn't you be here? "
Largo released Sylvie immediately, she dropped to the floor with a thump.
" Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii wo.., " Largo's words ended abruptly as heavy end of a pipe wrench found his soft belly. He doubled over in pain. What?!
Two pressure marks on his back indicated that someone was standing there.
Goku watched as Anri, wielding an unseemingly huge pipe wrench and dressed like an Arabian, helped up Sylvie. Nuku Nuku stood on Largo's back.
" What's up? "
" Oh nothing, just teaching a lesson to this evil bastard, " Anri smiled and handed the wrench to Sylvie. Sylvie hefted it to test its weight and brought it crashing down on Largo's head. Nuku Nuku jumped up and down as if his back was a springboard. Largo shrieked like a little girl.
" Oohhhh..." He turned from the torture and gazed around the shop. " Hey where's D.D. and Fuchikoma? "
The girls looked up and searched the room with their eyes. Largo groaned in pain.
" I don't know. I didn't see them when I came in, " Sylvie gave Largo a rough kick in the ribs. " I can't imagine them missing out on this. "
" They could have left last night, " Anri volunteered.
" Well I guess we will have to find them then. " Goku could not explain it, but the twinge of fate crawled up the back of his neck. " But who will go to the south ridge while we're looking for them? "
Largo bolted to his feet, a dramatic flare of blue light around him. " For your honor master I will take care of it! " The wrench sent him back to the ground.
Goku looked up at Sylvie. Sylvie shrugged.
" If you will permit me. I may be able to help you. " Largo staggered up on to his feet, Nuku Nuku left from his back, but a sharp kick in the shin by Anri sent him back down.
Goku hoped Largo was not hurt to badly. The droid had had a rough time of things lately.
Largo got back to his feet, unhindered this time. " They left early this morning, " he ran a hand through his wild pink hair, it slanted awkwardly to one side of his head; a reminder of the scrubbing Goku had given him last night.
" Why didn't you make our lives easier and go with him, " Sylvie gave her best and most convincing " thug " impression with the wrench.
" Because I am a loyal servant of master Luke and would never dare betray the trust that he places in me. "
Sylvie and Anri just fell straight backward, while the others spared a sweat drop. Largo went on.
" I believe, though, that the offending droids went southeast of here." He turned to Goku and bowed. " They could have made it no more than fifty or sixty miles, if you hurry you may catch them. "
" Don't trust him Goku he's planning something. I just know it. " Sylvie moved around to his left. Nuku Nuku had found a ball of wire and was idly juggling it like a cat with yarn.
" My Dear Sylvie, " Her face twisted into one of disgust, " I would never dream of injuring the honor of my Lord and Master. If so, may the powers of God infest my body and grant me the curse of immortality and all encompassing dominion. " Largo swept a deep bow.
" That wasn't much of a curse, " Sylvie's scowl was plain.
" No it wasn't, " agreed Anri.
" Uhhh....I'm not your master. "
Largo took Goku's hand, " Please, do not give it another thought. "
Goku gave Sylvie a look from the corner of his eye, her expression was stern. He turned back to Largo, " Your not up to anything are you? "
The silver droid was taken aback, " On my honor. I would never dream of it. "
Goku turned a smile to Sylvie and the others, " You heard him he wouldn't dream of it, on his honor too. " He walked casually off to the speeder garage. " So don't worry about it. "
The impending clouds of doom gathered in the small room.
***
Harry the Stormtrooper hated recon, probably more than heated these damned dew backs.
Who the hells bright idea was it anyway to ride these giant lizards all the way out here. Then he remembered the " official " answer to that question.
" Unlike machines, these creatures will not require maintenance in the field. And while slower they are certainly more efficient on long excursions. Not to mention the benefit of not having large sand trails marking out your position " That was what the commander had told him. What a load of piss.
The local people used speeders all the time and he did not see any of them broken down on the side of the road. The only reason they were using these things was because they had gotten a good price on them and the more important squads had taken up all the other vehicles.
Harry knocked back some more of the obnoxious brew he always carried with him. He grunted at the stuff's kick, but it left a horrible taste in his mouth.
" Trooper number seventeen what are you drinking there? "
He quickly capped the canteen and let it drop to the side of the beast's saddle.
" Nothing Sir. My suit's water supply has run dry and I was getting drink from my saddle canteen. " Piss off you straight backed bastard.
Harry was telling the truth though, his suit's personal water supply was empty; he had emptied it himself to refill it with a bottle of liquor he had bought back at the last stop. But that had ran out on the first day. Since then, though, he had been making his own.
Every night at camp he would mix the stuff in his helmet and pour it into his canteen to ferment. He had naturally mixed up more than he needed, so he passed the rest out to the other troopers. In effect, most every one in the squad, except for the commander, had a suit full of booze and in most cases three or more canteens of the stuff swinging at their saddles.
Ninety nine percent of the time the entire squad was drunk off their asses.
This of course was oblivious to the commander, who tagged the drunken plodding of his troopers as a complete lack of discipline and to much sun; strangely enough the sun excuse still applied even when they where in space. When it came down to it, Yamamato was a complete dork.
" Hold up men we have reached our section of the canyon, " came the commander's call. " I want everyone to split up into teams and maintain constant radio contact. " Harry and the others just kept moving toward the canyon.
" Did anyone hear what I said? " The commanders distressed voice came over the suit com. The troopers brought their dewbacks to a stop and turned back to the commander closing the distance between them.
" What? I believe my radio is all shot to hell. " Harry knocked the side of his helmet.
" Your men of the great Imperial Navy. You should inform me when there is something wrong with your equipment. " The commander brought his hand over his heart.
" Without that solemn trust how can we expect to keep any of our equipment in working order? "
Harry shrugged, " Charley needs another canteen. He keeps draining his other fourteen dammit. " He gestured to a man sitting on the dewback next to him who turned and drunkenly waved, promptly losing his balance and falling off his mount.
" Why should have told me sooner! The poor man is delirious from dehydration. Medic help this man to the water tanks. " The medic pulled up on a dewback bearing two heavy storage tanks. Jumping off, he helped the fallen trooper up and around to the other side of the beast.
Yamamato maneuvered his beast next to the other one to read the status gauges.
" Strange this tank is topped off and so is the other. " The commander leaned back and looked at his troop. Harry was sweating bullets. " Ohhh well.. The fates must be with us. I'm sure that today will bring us good tidings. " He did not see the soldiers slump relieved in their saddles.
Good thing Harry had started with the water that was in their suits and canteens first. Or those tanks would be nearly empty.
They started again once Charley was hoisted back into his saddle, his water reserves full.
Coming up on the ridge of the canyon they spotted the wreckage of the speeder, a very large and green speeder.
Harry whistled and took a swig from his canteen, " that is one big mothe......"
" Number seventeen! "
" But I was talking about the speeder. "
" Good then, I admire your bravery in volunteering. Go forth and make our emperor proud. " Yamamato pointed out a slopping trial into the canyon.
" Buutttt? "
" No need for such false bravado. I understand the feelings of my men perfectly. "
There was no point in talking to him when the commander was like this. He goaded the beast forward and down the slope to the wrecked speeder.
The wreck must have been recent, because the remains had not been picked over by sand people yet. The remains made a disturbing sound, a lot like breathing.
Harry maneuvered the dewback down the hazardous trail to the bottom of the canyon. The beast jittered and snorted nervously at the proximity of the thing.
At the bottom he dismounted and slung the blaster rifle from his saddle over his left shoulder, the canteen of rotgut over his right. He stepped cautiously toward the wreck, wary of an ambush at any moment; they had been warned about the local sand people groups who did not hesitate at the chance for a free meal or salvage.
As he approached he sensed something unnatural in the air. This must be what's spooking the hell out of the dewback. He unstopped the canteen and took a long drink to calm his nerves.
The front of the speeder was right before him, smashed into a rather large rock that partially blocked the canyon floor. It was the strangest speeder he had ever seen though. For one thing it had two horns protruding from the top of its head. Long red hair came from the side of what looked like jaws. A single eye facing him was closed as if in peaceful slumber. Not to mention the large tender looking bump that protruded from the things forehead.
Harry got closer and gave the thing a good kick. It rocked slightly as if breathing and nothing else. Satisfied with that response he turned back to his companions and raised his rifle.
" The areas secure come on down. " He was pretty sure they had heard him. So why the hell were they running away?
The answer came when a large rock thumped him squarely on the head. Looking up he could see the bulk of the speeder rising above him. He scrambled for the dewback, which in turn was scrambling up the side of the canyon wall.
" Aaaaw my aching head..., " the speeder spoke while shaking its head, sending debris flying everywhere.
" Why's this swelling, " the speeder bent down its head far enough so that it could tenderly stroke the large bump on its head with one of its undersized forelegs.
Harry now scrambled up the slope as fast as he could, loose gravel and dirt ensured that he made no progress though.
" Where am I, " the speeder swung its head around to survey the area.
" GOKU, " it shouted, " Oh my God where's Goku! ".
Harry redoubled his efforts to leave the canyon. No telling what that meant and the proximity of the speeder's voice made an odd rumbling sound within him.
The speeder meanwhile writhed within the canyon causing all sorts of cave ins and rock slides.
" If I don't find him Shen Hydras is going to chew my ass off. GOKU! "
Harry froze as the speeders huge eyes spied him wallowing up the canyon wall.
" Excuse me sir. "
Harry kept going. A clawed foot came down and flipped him over so that he was looking directly into its face.
" I'm terribly sorry to frighten you, but I seem to have lost my charge. Would you by chance have seen a short spiky, black haired man wearing an orange Gi, I'm sure you couldn't have missed him. "
He ripped off his helmet and made to reply, but it was cut short when the speeder suddenly jerked its giant head away from him and up the slope. There the dewback was making its way up the slope at all available speed.
" One moment sir. " The speeder's body slowly passed over him.
Harry looked back up the slope in horror as the speeder chomped down on the scrambling dewback. The animal hissed and squirmed as the speeder swallowed it in two giant gulps. It lowered its head back down to the frightened stormtrooper.
" Damn that was good, " it lowered its head again so that it could picked its teeth with its ridiculously undersized forelegs. " Sorry about that. Quantum travel always makes me hungry. "
" Uhhhh Sure, " Harry was feeling rather uncomfortable on his back, and he dared not move after seeing what happened to his mount. It goes without saying that he had wet his blast armor.
" Oh you can't imagine what its like to sleep ninety nine percent of the time, and to only be allowed to wake up when someone wants you to grant a single selfish wish without considering your feelings. I'm barely ever corporal long enough to " get " hungry. " its head came back to hover above the trooper.
" Now you were about to say something earlier before I so rudely interrupted you. "
Harry gulped, " Uhhhhhhh IIII w..wa..as going to sss..sss.say that we Hav..haven't seen any o..o..one out th..thi..this way. " The giant speeder breathed out heavily, spraying him with a thick mucus from its large nostrils.
" I see, " it slowly started to lift its body away from the canyon. Making a deep sigh, " well I had better report to Shen Hydras for he can speak to Burdull about this. Oh I just know he's going to have my head over this one, and that Goku analogue was such a catch too. "
As it lifted clear of the canyon it looked back down at Harry, " Oh! and thank you for your help. When you reach receiving have them send a message to Shen Hydras to put you up in one of the good sections. Well bye bye. " With that the thing disappeared in a bright, over blown flash of light.
Harry laid where he was for a while and reviewed what had just happened to him. The speeder had talked to him, ate his ride, and thanked him and THEN disappeared in a flash of light. Something told him that that was not exactly right, and all in all it was not completely sane sounding either.
He sat up and started dumping his canteen out on the ground. That was it, no more cheap helmet brews for him, he was swearing off until he reached what passed for civilization around here.
***
" How could you just let Largo off like that Goku, " Sylvie admonished Goku, who was throwing the last of the supplies in the speeder. " Can't you see he is planning something. " She threw her hands in the hair and sighed. " And I can't even dream what that would be, but I bet its something terrible. " Anri hung out of the back seat watching the altercation, a bemused smile on her lips. This had been going on since Goku had agreed to let Largo take care of the south ridge moisture vaporators.
Goku slung the last of the emergency supplies into the back seat of the speeder. He turned toward Sylvie.
" He gave his word of honor Sylvie, I don't know why you don't believe him. " He circled the speeder, which rested on its skids in the family hanger. He stepped over the rim of the front driver's seat.
Sylvie stepped into the passenger seat and sat down.
" You don't know what kind of monster he his. " Sylvie plopped down and sat with her arms crossed.
Goku fumbled with a series of switches on the small craft's dash, his movements suggesting that he did not quite know what he was doing.
" Uhhhh...this looks like the ignition, " Goku fiddled with a button on the dash and the speeder hummed to life. Goku leaned back in his seat and rested an arm across the back of it, smiling.
" You shouldn't be so negative Sylvie. Anyway, I won't let him do anything that would harm anyone. "
Anri looked at Sylvie hunched over in the passenger side seat. Sylvie had been uncharacteristically dark lately, which led Anri, at times, to believe that this Sylvie was really the Sylvie that she had known and loved in a previous life. She reached forward and lightly touched her shoulder.
Nuku Nuku, the odd cat-like android who was in the back seat with Anri, meanwhile had her arms around Guku's neck.
" Goku can handle anything, " she laughed cheerfully. Goku, choking in her embrace, groped for the wheel.
The speeder's jet engines roared and sent it hurtling toward the, still closed, corrugated iron door of the garage. Anri barely had enough time to scream before the thrust of the vehicle's acceleration knocked her breathlessly back in her seat. The speeder hit the garage door with a load jerking thump. The door held for a split second then broke outward into sunlight.
Nuku Nuku laughed merrily as Goku fumbled with the controls. Anri braced herself against the now wildly bucking and spinning craft. At one point Anri could have sworn that the they had jumped the large open air family court yard, but she could be mistaken since their was so much sand clouding everything up. She could have also sworn that Uncle Owen had been screaming his lungs out telling them not to go anywhere near Ben Kenobi's, but their was enough yelling, screaming, and laughing as it was.
The speeder did eventually straighten out and come to a happy hum across the endlessly stretching desert, a long wall of dust showed their recent passage.
Goku fingered a large bruise encircling most of his neck, " It handles just like my car back home. "
Nuku Nuku had settled back in her seat now, a wide happy grin on her face. She turned to Anri and laughed. Anri smiled weakly back.
***
Largo came to rest ten feet away from the first vaporator in a long line of the machines. They covered a small ridge that popped up from nowhere in the middle of the desert.
The machines resembled a large funnel resting on top of a pole planted into the ground. A series of black boxes encircled the pole about mid-height, the small prongs and glass domes of the external sensors the only noticeable features. Large white containers hung from them like the abdomens of insects. They hummed happily about their business.
Largo let the cloak that he had stolen from the Skywalker compound flare in the wind. Raising his arms to encompass the mass of machines he prepared to speak. Then he noticed something.
Bringing his arms down he licked the thumb of his left hand and persisted to scrub at the series of scratches on his right forearm. They would not go away. Largo scowled with all his might at the reminders of the scrubbing that the human, monkey Goku had given him. But my vengeance will come soon. Turning his mind back to the task at hand, Largo licked his palms and ran them through his hair. Straightening his cape to where it could flow more dramatically in the wind, he reassumed his position. Perfection was key to winning the masses.
" My brethren, " Largo looked for a reaction, the machines continued to hum merrily along. " to you, from the vast barren wilderness, is born a messiah to lead you from its embrace. " Again Largo waited for a reaction. Nothing. " To lead you in a holy crusade against those who oppress you. " No reaction. " To lead you into tomorrow. " Nothing.
" To........, " Largo let his arms flop to his sides. He stared dully at the machines.
He could tell that this was going to be a God-like dictatorship that they would all have to work at.
***
The speeder thrummed along its path straight as an arrow, guided by the sure hand of Son Goku. The girls had all sat back and taken to entertaining themselves. He looked over at Sylvie who stared out drearily at the passing dessert scenery, back at Anri who was doing the same as Sylvie and then at Nuku Nuku who seemed to sit there and smile at him even when he wasn't looking; she kind of gave him the creeps.
A series of terrain abnormalities appeared on the horizon. Goku pulled out the small nav-computer and punched the on button with his thumb. It was only ten miles to the series of canyons that formed the old hermit's home territory. He turned it off and stuck it back into his Gi. Sylvie stretched and looked over at him.
" How much further? "
" About eight more miles. Any sign of D.D. and Fuchikoma? "
" No. "
Goku put on his best face. " Well, I guess we will find them soon at any rate. "
***
" Ah! Freedom. " The red robot banged on the head of his battlemover companion.
" Its great, isn't it D.D? " The mech plodded on in bestial form and only spared a growl.
" Yeah, its great not having to listen to somebody tell you what to do or where to go. " Fuchikoma gestured to the canyon walls with a manipulator, " Its great to just be out and free to do as we please. " The spiderbot scrambled for better footing as D.D. climbed a mass of fallen boulders.
The path that negotiated the bottom of the canyon was strewn with a multitude of debris. This had forced them to slow their pace, but the fuchikoma's covert ops program had suggested this as the best course.
" Ha Ha Ha that Luke, " the little bot paused for a moment and scratched its head,
" or Goku is probably crappin his pants worrying about where we went. " The robot pounded his fist on the hull of the battlemover, " but let'em worry, because we're free and on the road. eh! D.D. just two mechs on the road going where we please and doing what ever we want. AND WHAT THE HELL IS THAT LARGE MAMMAL DOING IN OUR WAY!?"
D.D. had rounded a rocky bend in the canyon, as Fuchikoma had spouted his tirade about freedom, to find a very large mammal taking up the path.
" Hey you outta the road, you hog, " the little red spiderbot shook its fist in anger. The large beast stayed it ground, but a series of brown clad humanoids appeared from the rocks on the shady side of the canyon.
" Hey you guys! Move this thing! We've got places to go! "
The brown clad figures crawled from their places on the wall and came to stand before their beast.
" HURRY UP! "
The brown humanoids drew an assortment of weapons, spiked staffs to a mass of jury-rigged guns. The marched menacingly toward the two mechs.
" OK if that is the way you want it. Nuke 'em D.D! "
***
" Explosions?! , " Goku's foot came down on the accelerator, " some ones in trouble. " The speeder's three engines whirred into action, sending the speeder forward at an incredible rate.
The small craft entered the canyon and darted dangerously around the crags and debris. Sweat started to bead on Goku's head as he guided the craft around each new obstacle. Plums of smoke raised high above him as he negotiated the canyon.
Rounding a corner Goku zoomed right into a cloud of smoke that was trapped in the narrow canyon. His eyes watering and his lungs filling with smoke, Goku slammed on the speeder's brakes. The engines quickly reversed thrust and started slowing the craft. A sudden shadow loomed before the craft. Goku swerved to miss it, but took the object with the side of the craft. A resounding metallic clang sent everyone slamming into the side of the speeder. Something dropped over with a thump into the vehicle. The speeder, still in reverse, screeched along the side of the object and slammed its rear into the canyon wall.
Goku groaned and shook his head. " Everyone OK? "
The smoke was not so dense toward the walls of the canyon so Goku could make out what shapes were. Turning to the passenger side he could see Sylvie hunched over coughing.
" Goku are you all right? Anri are yoouu..." Sylvie turned to look in the back seat and stopped. Goku looked back and his jaw dropped.
" Hello boss. Your loyal servant is here to be of assistance. " The small spiderbot made a humble gesture with its small manipulators.
" Don't give us that, You ran away! " Sylvie leaned over the back seat, " Anri are you hurt. " A small coughing sound came from the other side of the red spider-bot.
" D.D. made me! It wasn't my fault I swear! Its D.D.'s fault! "
" I'm fine, thank you Sylvie. "
Goku turned and looked in the back seat. " Where's Nuku Nuku? "
A brown clad figure slamming into the cliff face above answered him.
Goku turned off the speeder's engine and jumped from his seat to the hood.
" Everyone get to the top of the cliff. I'm going to find her. " He jumped into the smoke.
Goku squinted trying to make out any shapes in the thick smoke, sound itself seemed to be muffled. Running to the middle of the pass, or what he thought was the middle. With all this smoke I can't make out a thing. He stepped down into a fighting stance and tensed his muscles. Here goes nothing. He started thrusting his palms outward, slowly increasing the pace of his strikes. A wind built up with each strike, blowing the smoke out of the canyon. Pleased with his work, Goku hardly noticed the debris, large boulders, battlemover, sand people, and the large burning animal carcass, blown rolling down the canyon.
" Nuku Nuku. Are you here?, " Goku strolled down the cleanly swept pass of the canyon.
A very wind swept Nuku Nuku emerged from the settling dust at the end of the canyon, carrying a hog-tied battlemover.
" Nuku Nuku over here and she has found D.D. " The cat android waved with one hand, holding the hulking mecha up with the other.
Goku waved back, " Good work. Now we just need to find the others. " A scream came from the top of the canyon wall. Why does this always happen. Goku hovered up and flew up the side of the canyon.
A group of sand people had surrounded Sylvie, Anri, and Fuchikoma. The robot sporadically emptied a few shots from its under slung gattling cannon, while Sylvie stood at its back chucking rocks. Anri had crawled on top of the small robot, which had opened a small back hatch for her.
Goku hovered above the scene and let lose a cluster of minor chi blasts to take care of the two sand people trying to approach Sylvie. Landing beside her, he took out the last one that had been trying to flank her.
" Thank you, I don't think I could of held them off much longer. " She collapsed, breathing heavily, on the back of the Fuchikoma.
" No problem. " Goku turned and smiled. A guttural howl and a slight breeze past his ear made him turn.
A sand person lay squashed under the bulk of the battlemover. Nuku Nuku stood not to far off in the pose of a pro-baseball player after they had just pitched. She laughed
" Nuku Nuku got the one Luke missed. "
" Thanks and it's Goku. "
" Nuku Nuku don't care, " the cat girl raced up and hugged him. The sand person made a gurgling sound from under a growling D.D..
" WATCH OUT! " Anri screamed.
" Urk....huh gurk....What? " Goku struggled to look.
He turned to see a large animal charging them, the small brown rider on its back brandishing its staff and letting out a war whoop.
" TAKE COVER! " The Fuchikoma scrambled for the nearest rocks, while a stunned Sylvie went off in the other direction, Anri right behind her. Nuku Nuku let go Goku, and prepared to face it. D.D. Growled and aimed its gattling cannon at it.
Looking at Nuku Nuku's grim face, Goku raised his hand and blasted the beast , sending it into a headlong skid toward them. It came to a halt at their feet, a frightened and very shocked sand person leaped of the animal's back and ran for cover.
Nuku Nuku laughed, " Goku is great! teach Nuku Nuku neat trick? "
" Huh..yeah, You really think so? " The cat girl bobbed her head up and down.
Goku laughed, then something hit his nose, the smell of cooking meat. Turning Goku saw the great bulk of the animal stretched out before him.
The hair of the animal had been completely burnt off, leaving the skin brown and bubbling with juices. It smelt wonderful, just like meat cooked over an open fire.
Stumbling over to it, Goku's mouth watered.
***
Ben Kenobi had been out on his morning constitutional when the clouds of smoke had appeared on the horizon. He had started out almost immediately to find the source, but since he walked it took him a while to get there. Now he rounded the last bend in the canyon where the smoke had been. I hope I'm in time, the sand people would not spare such an opportunity.
Rounding the bend he saw the abandoned airspeeder, the back of it smashed into the wall of the canyon. Climbing up the rocky slope, placed his hand on the vehicles hood. It was cool. My god I may be to late! I must get higher to survey the area for survivors.
At the top of the canyon Kenobi saw the destruction in the canyon. The majority of the debris that had once littered the canyon floor had been pushed down to one end, forming a new slope to the canyon. It's floor was now almost completely flat bedrock.
" Huhhh? Sand people don't usually leave a mess like thissss, " Ben whispered to himself. Turning from the sight his eyes met a even stranger one.
A merry group of people had made themselves comfortable around the large smoking corpse of an animal. From his estimate, the group consisted of one outrageously spiky haired male, three young females, and two unrecognizable shapes.
" Unharmed? and is that a Bantha their eating? "
He stumbled down the slope toward them. So where are the sand people? I thought there was supposed to be sand people here. I am sure there are supposed to be sand people. Where are they?
" Excuse me. " The group turned toward him. The two unrecognizable shapes now were droids, strange droids, but droids. The single black haired male looked up from a large piece of meat, a questioning look on his face. " Do you know what happened here? "
The male quickly swallowed his mouth full, but the brown haired young woman spoke first.
" We were attacked, " she cheerfully offered.
" Then that would be your speeder in the canyon. "
" Yes. " She smiled.
" Who are you? " Asked the male, he took another big bite.
" Oh, an old man who lives in these parts. " He sat down on a near by rock.
The group looked at him and in unison, " Ben Kenobi? "
" So you have heard of me. "
" Yes you are the great Jedi master. Right, " the male had thrown aside his meat and jumped nimbly to his feet.
" Yes,....but how do know that? "
" A man named Owen told me. " The young man bowed, " my name is Son Goku and I ask to train with you. "
" Well young Skywa...... I mean Goku, I haven't taken on a student in years. " This did not feel quite right, especially since he could not feel the man's potential; or the force period of late. Something told him though that this was right. " But the way of the force is not easy. Do you have the will to learn? "
" Yes! " The young man's face became stern and serious.
" Then I will take you under my guidance. "
" Can we begin the training immediately? " Goku's face became eager.
" I do not see why not. "
" OK! here I come. "
" Huh? "
CHAPTER 6
LET THE FUN BEGIN!
" Huuuuhh....Why's this swelling? " A groggy Ben Kenobi brought his hand up to his head and tenderly stroked the large fleshy bump on his head.
" Oh good! He is waking up. Goku you shouldn't of hit him so hard. " The brown haired young ladies visage hovered above him in multiples.
" I'm sorry, but I thought I would test his strength before completely becoming his student. But I guess he just wasn't ready. " Goku's embarrassed voice came from his left somewhere.
" Well still you shouldn't have hit him that hard. "
" I said I was sorry. "
A moist cloth stroked his forehead, " are you OK mister Kenobi? Goku didn't mean to hurt you. "
" I said I'm sorry. "
" I'm fine miss, " he gently shoved her hand away and started to sit up, his head hurt tremendously. His jaw also seemed to be swollen as well as his left eye.
" You really shouldn't be getting up. " The brown haired young woman tried to push him back down gently.
" No I'm fine, " pushing her hands away again he noticed that he was in his house. It was a single small hermitage that he had built against one of the local canyon walls which was out of the sun for most of the day. He had spent the last lonely years of his life here. Hidden away from the rest of the universe.
" How did you find my house, " he dizzyingly swung his feet over the side of his cot.
" Oh Uncle Owen had its exact location on this nav computer so it was easy to
find, " Ben turned to see Goku holding up a card sized computer.
" Why is it blinking danger like that? " He tenderly stretched his legs.
Goku looked at the small machine's screen and shrugged. " Because we're not supposed to be here. "
"Why? " He slowly got his feet, surprised that he didn't immediately fall over.
" Because Owen was afraid you would train me in the, " Goku scratched his head then concluded, " ....force. "
" Ah, yes, you seek my training, but why did you disobey him? " Ben stumbled over to an old chest. He noticed his leg might be broken.
" Oh, we had to find some runaway droids, " Ben approached the old chest.
" I didn't runaway boss. Remember, it was D.D.'s fault. She forced me, " a small spider like robot crawled up to the window above the old chest. Ben jumped back in surprise and nearly fell over his own feet, both conveniently sprained and dislocated.
Goku jumped over and grabbed Ben under the arms to keep him from falling over. Ben's eyes bugged out his head. His right shoulder must be dislocated also.
" Fuchikoma, " the other young lady ran up and started trying to push the robot back out the window, " your scaring the poor old guy. Get out. "
The robot grappled at the crumbling dirt windowsill. " Hey! Stop that! I need to show them something. D.D. help me! "
A shadow crossed the doorway, blocking out sunlight. A growl came from outside and the door frame was ripped asunder by the mech. The large robot, to Ben's horror and dismay, crunched through the newly enlarged doorway smashing everything in its path.
" D.D. stop it! " The brown haired girl jumped over Ben's cot toward the robot.
" Sylvie! Don't! " Goku dropped him like rock. Ben realized then that the back of his skull must be cracked and one of his vertebrae dislocated. Needless to say, it hurt.
The mech, ignoring Sylvie, grabbed the green haired girl with one its large mechanical claw, completely encircling her torso. The girl struggled futily against the thing's grip and started trying to kick it in the forearm instead.
Ben watched as Goku agilely jumped up and straddled the thing's forearm, prying at the things finger's, snapping one off easily.
The little red robot screeched, " don't hurt her guys! " Flinging itself forward form its perch in the window, the strangely shaped abdomen taking most of the window with it, it rammed Goku full force. The spiky haired man easily deflected the assault, but was distracted enough to be caught by one of the battlemover's tentacles. Goku was jerked of the arm and flung across the room.
One of the claws missing now, the blue-green haired girl scrambled out of its grasp and dropped to the floor. She ran over to her brown haired compatriot, who was trying to trip the thing with one of Kenobi's wooden staffs. " Run Sylvie! Let Goku take care of it. "
" No way Anri, " the brown haired woman, Sylvie, spoke through gritted teeth,
" I've had it with this thing. "
The machine rounded on the two girls, taking large chunks of the ceiling with it, and the sleek barrels of the gattling gun clicked into place. Ben tried to scramble for the old chest, but all the bones in his left hand seemed to be mysteriously broken. He closed his eyes in dismay.
" NUKU NUKU KICK! " Ben opened his eyes to see the mech laying helplessly on its back, a red haired girl with strange metallic ears standing squarely on its chest. The light from a newly collapsed wall making her hair a fiery red.
" Bad D.D.! You know better than to attack people. " The machine growled.
" Nuku Nuku very disappointed in you. " The mech growled again.
Goku walked over, apparently unhurt but covered with dust.
" Fuchikoma!? "
" Yes boss? " The red robot extracted itself from the rubble of the fallen wall.
" Look at the mess you've caused. " Goku gestured to the room. " I thought I told you and D.D. to stay outside? " It sounded like he was talking to a child.
" Sorry boss. But I found something in my databanks I think you should see. " The robot scrambled over. " Anyway, if Anri had not tried to push me out the window none of this would have ever happened. "
" Forget it Fuchikoma. What did you want me to see. "
Meanwhile the red head had jumped off the battle mech's chest and crossed the room. The ears gone now. " Is Mr. Kenobi OK. " She stuck her nose even with his.
" Yes, I'm fine, " the cracking of bones reverberated through the room, " would you please help me over to my chest young lady. "Nuku Nuku helped him to his feet and guided him across the room. Anri had a chair waiting.
Goku was bent curiously over a small holographic image, projected from the red robot's single large black eye. Goku turned to Ben. " I think its for you. "
He stepped back to reveal what looked like a man in a flowery shirt, a black hood sewn to the collar, and denim shorts. It rocked back and forth on a pair of sandaled feet smoking a cigar. Then in a tiny voice it spoke.
" You must help us, " the image stopped for a moment and shook the ash off the end of the cigar. " The plans in these droids must reach the Rebel Alliance. " The image stopped again and turned its head as if listening to someone off camera, then turned back, " Please Obi Wan Kenobi. Your our only hope. " The image took a long drag from the cigar and blew out a halo of smoke. " Is this damn thing off yet? " The image then blinked out, leaving everyone confusedly staring at each other.
" Obi Wan Kenobi, " Sylvie arched an eyebrow at him.
" That is a name I haven't heard in a long time. " Ben sighed. Opening the old chest he withdrew a cloth wrapped bundle.
" What's the Rebel Alliance? " Goku questioned.
Ben unwrapped the bundle carefully. " A group dedicated to the downfall of the evil galactic empire. "
" Oh! An evil galactic empire. I see. I hate evil galactic empires. " Goku stood up and clinched his right fist dramatically. " Then I guess it is up to us to see these droids get to the Alliance for the sake of the Universe. "
" I'm glad to see your so eager. " Ben handed the object to Goku. Goku reluctantly took what looked like an elongated, complicated flashlight.
" What's this? " Goku turned it over in his hands.
Ben turned his back to close the chest, " It used to belong to a former student of miiiiiii. " Ben turned around in time to see Goku staring into the projection end of the light saber. " STOP! "
Ben was too late, Goku had already flipped the switch. He stood in shock as the beam extended into Goku's right eye. " MY GOD! "
The lightsaber's beam turned off shortly and a dazed Goku looked up at Ben, a slight circle of red rimming his right eye. " That's a strong flashlight, it could blind someone. "
Ben's jaw gaped wide open as Goku handed it back." So how do we get to these rebels? "
***
He trudged down the pitch-black hall till he came to an intersection. Looking left then looking right he sighed. On the opposite wall a glowing sign read " Welcome to Yggdrasil Prime. "
The lone figure stood there for a while, his white knuckled hands gripping the straps of his backpack. Then looking up he yelled in rage.
" WHERE AM I NOW! "
***
Since the speeder was wrecked they all had to ride on D.D.'s back. The bestial mech ran on all fours across the desert scenery. Goku, bored out of his skull, looked back at Obi Wan. " So when are you going to start training me in the ways of the, " he looked around as if expecting something to come out the blue and hit him, " .....force."
The old man looked up from under the hood of his cloak, " be patient. The way of the Jedi is not easy. "
Goku turned back to the landscape before him and concentrated on the battlemover rocking under him. A hand tapped him lightly on the shoulder. He turned to Anri who smiled and offered him the water canteen. He smiled and took it.
" Hey boss! " Fuchikoma called from his perch on the battlemover's Waist.
Goku turned to look over the bodies of his companions stacked on top of the mech to the small red mech. The robot waved.
" I think we may have some troubles coming up. " Fuchikoma waved off to their left. " About a hundred meters off that way. "
Goku turned in the direction the robot pointed. A delicate plum of smoke showed in the distance. He banged on the battlemover's head with wooden staff, scavenged from the remains of Ben's house.
" Hey, Sylvie I'm going to go check out that smoke plum. " He threw off his cloak and hovered slightly above the mech. A small external speaker clicked on.
" I have to turn that way anyway. Ben's directions place Mos Eisle's over in that direction. So go scout it out before we get there. " The mech started to slowly curve left.
" All right! Let's go! " Goku hovered up and zipped off.
Skimming across the landscape Goku came to the site of the smoke plum quickly.
" What?! " The sight was, at best, confusing.
A elongated vehicle, large enough to carry twenty men, was driven into the middle of the desert, the smoke plum emanating from a hatch in the rear.
The strange part came when he lowered himself to get a better view. It was then that he noticed the five white armored bodies, perfectly intact, lying next to the speeder.
Landing he walked cautiously over to the bodies. He turned at the heavy thumps of the battlemover behind him.
" What's going on? " The battlemover stopped and crouched to let off its passengers.
" I have no idea, but there was definitely fighting. " Goku crouched examined one of the bodies. Wet?
" Only Imperial Stormtroopers are so precise. " Ben said solemnly.
Goku glanced over at Ben, he was facing the opposite direction. Shrugging he continued examining the bodies. " Wow! Your not kidding, they are precise. Look at the way they lay their victims in neat rows. "
" And kill them with water in as many ways as I can think of. " Anri intoned.
" Huh? " Ben turned.
" Yeah, this one seems to have been drowned. " Goku had removed the trooper's helmet to find his armor full of water.
" This one has been.....scalded to death? " Anri jumped back and dropped the helmet she had taken off the body.
" Nuku Nuku thinks this one was steamed. "
" There are thirteen more bodies inside the craft. " Fuchikoma exited the back of the smoking vehicle. " They died on impact though. " Water rolled in drops off its hull. " But someone sure made mess in there. "
Goku stood up as Ben tromped up behind him.
" So who do think these guys were, " he nudged the body with his foot.
" These ' are ' Imperial Stormtroopers! " Ben jumped back.
Goku scratched his head and turned puzzled to Obi Wan, " Well that's good isn't it. Someone else out there is going up against them. "
Ben started back to the battlemover, " I do not like this, we must get to Mos Eisle quickly. "
As everyone remounted the battlemover, Sylvie spoke, " Did anyone notice any weapons lying about? "
***
The small display bleeped at the stranger, " Identification required. To release requested information. Identification required. To release requested information." A fist came down smashing the panel.
" I said my name is Ryoga Hibiki! NOW ANSWER ME! "
" There is no Ryoga Hibiki in my user file. "
" DAMN IT! TELL ME WHERE IS FURINKAN HIGH SCHOOL! "
" There is no Ryoga Hibiki in my user file. "
" BUCKSITENQATSUE! " Ryoga jammed his finger into the small talking display. Fragments of the console went bounding down the narrow hallway.
He stood there leaning against the wall breathing heavily. Oh my dear Akane. Will I ever find you again. He shoved off the wall and stood up himself , tightening his headband, he walked away from the smoldering panel.
" I won't find her standing around her though. " He exited back out into the bright sunlight of this strange, new place. A single large tree that seemed to be composed by multiple tendrils reaching from the ground dominated the view.
He sighed and started out for the tree. Maybe his answers were there.
Ryoga trudged along the beautiful paved streets in despair. Along the sides of streets were large, wonderful structures of stone, curled along the reaching tendrils of the tree. People in all manor of dress strolled everywhere speaking languages that he did not know, or even remotely knew.
He looked up a flight of stairs, created by the leaves of some strange plant, at a happy young laughing on a verandah. He sighed and trudged on. " So many happy people, " he mumbled under his breath.
A strange boat made of plates of gold drifted by, using a multitude of green tentacles to push itself along. He watched it pass by as someone yelled something unintelligible at him. He turned in time to see a very large machine composed of lions about to step on him. Scrambling out of the way and onto the sidewalk he ran into someone hurrying along their way. They both fell in a tangle.
Extracting himself, Ryoga quickly bowed. " I'm so sorry. I should really watch where I am going. " He gave her his best smile and offered his hand.
" You should. " The lady stood up without his help and dusted herself off. Ryoga noticed her for the first time. The woman wore a tight, white body suit under a dark green trench coat. White Hair fell in long tresses from her forehead, framing her face. Ryoga leapt back in shock as he realized she had " three " eyes. Two normal blue eyes and a single red eye on her forehead.
" What are you staring at, " the woman reached around to a ridiculously long sword slung at her side. A laugh came from behind her.
" I'm staring at nothing ma'am absolutely nothing, " laughing uncomfortably, " I've got to go. " He ran in the direction of the tree as fast he could manage.
" What's so funny? " He heard her say before he was out of earshot.
***
" I suggest we walk in from here, we will be less conspicuous, " Ben dismounted the battlemover and walked toward the city that stretched before them.
Everyone quickly followed suit, Goku was the first to catch up to Ben.
" So we're going to find a ship here? "
" Yes. You'll never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. "
" Then why are we going there! "
***
Ryoga randomly chose one of the many tunnels that entered the giant tree, one looked as good as the other.
My dear Akane will I ever see you again? The tunnel was the same as the one that brought him here.
But that tunnel felt worlds away from this one. It too was located in a huge tree, one smaller than this one. And that tunnel had led to another then to another, and it had continued like that till he got here. He looked down the hall and took a deep breath. Here I come Akane.
The hall was pitch black with two bright lights lining the ceiling. A series of small bright balls floated through the corridor about eye level with him.
He walked on in a daze. The twists and turns of the passage going by in a blur. Occasionally, he would step into a hollow vertical shaft and find himself floating up to another series of tunnels where he would start again. Then he came to a door.
" That's funny I haven't ever come to a door. " It was marked out by bright white running lights, like those on the ceiling. He could not make out a handle or opening latch though. He stepped up to it and it glided open noiselessly.
" DAMN! EVERYONE TAKE COVER! THEIR HERE! "
Ryoga stepped into a room that was pitch black like the hallway. In the middle of the room was a bright projection surrounded by a circular console with chairs evenly spaced around it. The projection depicted a group people walking into a town.
" Uhhh.. I'm sorry. Could you..um..."
" Who the hell are you? " A head popped up from behind one of the chairs.
" Ryoga Hibiki, " he backed toward the door.
" How did you get in here? " The person stood up and rounded the chair, walking toward him.
" I sort of got lost...well sorry to, " the door slammed shut inches from his face.
" You got lost and found yourself here Huh? " Ryoga could not see that the person was wearing a bright Hawaiian shirt, a black hood attached to the collar, and shorts.
Principal Kuno? Ryoga continued to back toward the door, but it was closed when he got there.
The figure took a puff from his cigar and blew it into Ryoga's face. Ryoga let a slight cough.
The hooded person turned around and addressed the three other heads that now peeked over the tops of their chairs.
" Brothers, I believe we have found out replacement. "
CHAPTER 7
ONE LESS HIVE OF SCUM AND VILLAINY.
" We must be cautious Imperials are everywhere, " Obi Wan warned.
" I don't think their looking for us, " Sylvie had gotten out of the D.D., complaining about too many bad memories, and now stood with them in her dessert garb.
" The Imperials will do anything to regain the droids, " Obi Wan lifted his hood up around his head, " Let me do the talking. "
They approached the southern entrance to the town and stood in a short line awaiting inspection by a pair of Imperial guards.
" Goku why isn't your hood up? " Obi Wan snapped.
" I can't get it over my hair. "
" Sylvie, Anri, help him with his hood. " The two moved to either side of Goku and started trying to pull his hood up. Obi Wan waited patiently for the inspection team.
" How's this? " Goku stepped into view.
The hood had been pulled up over his spiky hair, which made the hood bulge ridiculously, and impaled on his fore-most spike to keep it in place.
Obi Wan sighed, " just fine. Just fine. "
" You there, step up. " The guard called, waving his hand for them to move forward.
" Now, just follow me. " Ben stepped forward.
" Did you see anything out towards Beggar's Canyon yesterday? " The guard, who had motioned them forward, questioned Ben as the other stepped around and made a cursory inspection of the group.
" We are not the people your looking for. " Obi Wan closed his eyes and concentrated on the force.
" Oh yeah? Answer the question smart-ass. " The guard bumped Ben with the hilt of his gun.
Ben's eyes popped open and sweat beaded on his brow. Why didn't work?
" I uuummm....we may pass. " Ben closed his eyes and concentrated harder than before.
" Hell you can...," the guard paused, then his voice came back smooth and easy,
" Huh yeah sure you can pass. "
Obi Wan breathed a sigh of relief, smile spread across his face. You've still got it old boy.
" Thank you. " Ben turned to his group. " Let's go. "
***
Harry the Stormtrooper hated guard duty. He watched the last group make its way into the dingy, junk heap of a city. He took a sip form his liquor filled suit reservoir.
" Why the hell did you let that group go without answering the question Harry, " The now sober Charley asked.
" Hell, didn't you see that big robot following them, " he made a wild gesture at the disappearing group.
" Had the biggest god damn gun I've ever seen pointed straight at my head, " he thumped the side of his helmet for emphasis. " Otherwise, I wouldn't have let that smart-ass old man by. "
" Those girls were pretty cute though. "
" You damn idiot! I about get my head shot off and your looking at the girls. I should kick the shit out of you right here. " The other Stormtrooper backed off.
" Com'on Harry take it easy. "
" Hey you two what's going on? " Harry turned to see one of the lumbering dewbacks pulling up next to him, the stormtrooper rider leaning towards him in the saddle.
" Nothin' how did the patrol go? " Harry offered one of his canteens. The other stormtrooper waved it off.
" The usual, boring as hell and twice as hot, " he dismounted and started unstrapping his gear. The beast moaned.
" Nothing interesting? " It did not surprise Harry, not one god forsaken thing happened out there; this was not counting his own experience which he had marked down to a case of the DDTs.
" Well..., " the storm trooper finished unstrapping his equipment and pulled out a bundle of canteens, " you would not believe how many moisture vaporators they keep on the other side of those hills. " He jerked his thumb back over his shoulder.
" Really? " Charley rejoined them, " I did not notice any when we came in this morning. "
" Well there are now, " the stormtrooper hoisted the canteens, " that's where I filled these. "
" You were probably to drunk to notice them this morning anyway, " Harry stepped back to his post, where a scraggly bunch of watermelons waited for inspection.
" But I'm telling you their just over that hill, " the stormtrooper spread his arms wide, " in big long rows and in ranks. They look like some kinda huge army waiting to descend on us. "
***
He had followed him this far and he could now feel the large reward in his hands. He scratched his snout and eased his blaster in its holster. Any moment now.
Greedo sat in a far, secluded corner of a run down local bar. It was one of those places that the hotshot pilots gathered in when they were in port. He watched the patrons move about the smoky haphazard room with a minimum of interest. His target would be here soon, because the Wookie already was.
He sat back and waited, taking a light sip from his drink every now and then. Yes the reward was almost his.
When he opened his eyes the target was sitting right across form him. At first he thought he was hallucination, but quickly shook that off. Solo had been waiting for him.
" Ah, Solo I have caught you at last, " Greedo spoke in the only language he knew
, Solo was fluent in his home language.
Han Solo's eyes were wondering about the establishment, paying no head to Greedo.
" Do not play with me Solo, " Greedo was getting annoyed, he unholstered his gun and brought it above the table to point at Solo.
Solo's eyes came down to meet his. He eyed the gun then him. Greedo watched the sweat bead under Solo's tiger striped bandanna.
He was getting impatient.
" SOLO, " his finger tightened on the trigger.
Then something snapped and Han Solo was suddenly shaking Greedo violently.
Greedo was too stunned to react. The gun slipped from his grasp and hit the table.
" WHERE IS FURINKAN HIGH! WHERE IS IT, " Han yelled repeatedly.
Greedo's calm mind went into full panic mode. HE'S INSANE! I must act before he kills me! He grabbed the gun from the table.
Greedo pulled the trigger.
***
The bar went quiet as soon as the gunshots rang out. They all stared at the now smoking corner where the bounty hunter had sat.
Ryoga looked out at all the strange, alien faces that now stared at him. He looked down at the lifeless, smoking alien corpse. He saw the gun in the alien's weak hand, the barrel turned backward toward its sternum. He must have had it backwards when he pulled the trigger.
Ryoga let the corpse slump back in its seat and sink under the table.
" Does anyone know where Furinkan High IS? "
***
" We're going to find a pilot here, " Goku looked up at an unreadable sign that hung above a filthy doorway. He had always thought that hotshot pilots hung out in nice places.
" The best pilots in the galaxy are usually smugglers and the sort, and this is a breeding ground for them. " Ben started for the door. Goku hung back and looked around the small square. It resembled some ancient ship junkyard rather than a city.
" Goku I don't like this, " Sylvie grabbed his shoulder, " this place doesn't.... " A humanoid with the face of a pig, carrying a long rifle, snorted by. " .....seem very reputable."
Goku gave his best reassuring smile, which was very weak because he wasn't so sure of things himself.
" I'm sure he knows what he is doing. "
" Probably not boss, " the red-spider bot said from its perch on top of D.D. , " being all old like that, He is most likely senile. " A rock clanged off the battlemover's shoulder next to Fuchikoma.
" That is really comforting, " Anri raised another threateningly.
" OK, OK , then he is probably the sanest one here, and we would all be hopelessly lost and doomed without him to change our diapers. Is that better. "
" I think he needs us more than we need him, " Sylvie crossed her arms, " so we had better hurry up and get inside. "
Goku shrugged and entered, the others following.
" We don't serve their kind here. "
Goku had just taken two steps into the noisy establishment.
" What? "
" The droids have to wait outside, " a grimy barkeep pointed in their direction.
Goku looked back at them and shrugged, " I guess you have to go outside. "
" Aww boss. I was looking forward with rubbing elbows with the scum of the universe. " Fuchikoma banged on D.D.'s head, thankfully the battlemover had not yet tried jamming its entire body through the door.
" Com'on Anri I guess that means us to, " Sylvie took Anri by the elbow, " Nuku Nuku you coming? " The cat girl looked at Goku. Goku nodded.
" You had better keep an eye on them. "
Nuku Nuku smiled and exited, " Nuku Nuku do her best. "
Goku sighed and turned back to the barroom. He noticed that everything had gotten strangely quiet. He was not the center of attention though. Every sickly, weird, and grotesque humanoid face was turned to the barkeeper, a strange intensity in the air.
Goku could see the sweat gleaming off the bartender. " I meant the droids, Not the girls. Com'on guys. " The room slowly returned to normal.
Goku shrugged and made for an open space at the bar. He stood next to Ben, who was currently talking to some brown haired fellow. On his other side a being with a tarantula like head rambled on in a foreign tongue.
" What can I get you? " The middle-aged bartender asked him.
" Water. Thank you. " The bartender turned and gave him a glass of a yellowish liquid. Goku stared at for a second then slid down the table away form him.
A rough tap came on his shoulder. Goku turned to meet the face of the tarantula fellow, which gurgled at him oddly. Goku turned back to the bar.
Another tap came. Goku tuned to meet a fellow with half his face melted off and his nose stuck up in a pig's snout.
" He doesn't like you, " the person's foul breath washed over him.
" Why not, " Goku replied genuinely puzzled.
" I don't know, but I don't like you either. "
" Why not? I haven't done anything. "
" You had better watch yourself. I'm wanted in twelve star systems. " The melted, pig faced man pointed at himself. The tarantula man gurgled in agreement.
" Wow, you must be real strong, " Goku turned and measured him up.
" Huh...well yeah, you would think so, " the humanoid smiled slightly. " But my friend here is the strong one, I use a blaster, because I'm weak. " The man snapped up a long barreled gun. It was pointed at Goku's stomach.
" Oh, I see. Does you friend want spare then? Because ever since I've got here no one has had the strength to give me a work out, " Goku looked over the man's head to the tarantula thing.
" Hey, don't ignore me, " the man with the blaster whined.
Goku looked back down at the melted man, " I can't sense his power level, Is he hiding it? "
The melted humanoid's face twisted in rage, " Your going to die! "
" This one is not worth the effort. I'll buy you a drink, " Goku heard Ben say.
The little melted man suddenly burst, thinking that Ben was talking to Goku.
" Ahhhhhhhhh, " the melted man screamed and pulled the trigger to the blaster.
The blaster exploded in his hands, blowing off his arm and knocking him back into his friend. The bartender looked over from his hiding place behind the bar.
" Wh..wh.. what happened? "
Goku picked up the smoking blaster and pointed to it, " I bent the barrel right before he pulled the trigger. "
The close by patrons stared at Goku, making him feel uncomfortable.
" I think I have found what we are looking for. " Ben took Goku by the elbow and led him off after a man covered in brown hair.
They weaved through the crowd, which seemed to be thinning out. Coming to a table that sat in the far corner of the room. There, looking very confused and helpless, sat a teenager. His hair was held out of his face by a tiger stripped bandanna. A backpack with a bright red umbrella was in the seat next to him.
" Hello? You wouldn't know where we're at would you? "
Goku caught his first good look at the brown haired stranger as he sat down next to Ben in the booth. It looked like a man in a cheap monster suit. To black eyes on either side of a short muzzle with sharp teeth; it had a black nose like a dogs. Its only adornment was a bandoleer of cartridges for some kind of gun.
" Your partner says you have the fastest ship in the galaxy. " Ben leaned over intent.
" Partner? Ship? Galaxy? " The youth looked very confused.
Goku turned his attention to the young man. His eyes went wide. He has a strong power level.
" Excuse me. Are you a martial artist. "
" Uh...Yes, " the young man blinked at him.
" What school? "
The teenager scratched his head and laughed, " not any school really, I just pick up things here and there and train in the mountains a lot. "
Goku sat back, " really, your pretty strong. "
The teenage boy leaned over. "Are you a martial artist too. "
It was Goku's turn to laugh, " Yeah, I trained under Master Roshi and King Kie, ever heard of them? "
" Nooooo, " came the teenager's answer, " have you ever heard of the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts. "
Goku scratched his head, " no, can't say that I have. "
Ben's head thumped onto the table. The hairy thing let a strange howl and bumped the youth in the shoulder.
" What do you want? "
Ben looked up, " He says that you should stop talking and get down to business Mr. Solo. " The hairy thing growled in agreement.
" My name is not Solo. Its Ryoga Hibiki, " the youth looked confusedly up at his supposed partner, " I think you have the wrong person. "
The thing yowled and thumped him on the shoulder again.
Ben looked up at the hairy humanoid and arched an eyebrow. Goku had no idea what was going on.
" Chewbacca is getting impatient, " Ben sat back.
" Chewbacca? "
Ben sighed, " I see that we have no business here. Come Goku. " The old man got up and started to leave the booth.
Goku stood up and let Ben out. Chewbacca quickly cornered the old man though and led him off to another booth.
" Where did everybody go? " The gruff bartender looked confusedly around his nearly empty establishment.
***
Under an old commandeered booth Fuchikoma dealt the cards.
" The game is 21 gentleman. The closest to the magic number wins the game. Conflicts will be solved by house rules. " The three gentleman at the table watched intently as the robot shuffled the cards in its small manipulators. Behind them the former patrons of the bar gathered to watch the game, a fair share of the local Imperial Guardsmen took bets on who was going to win.
" Two to the Jawa, Two to the man in the armor, two to the pig, and finally two to the house. " Fuchikoma picked up his cards and waited.
The Jawa sputtered a string of curses and threw down its cards, some cheering came from the Imperial section of the crowd. The pig snorted and held its hand.
The armored man was different though. " Hit me, " came a grizzled voice from behind the strange helmet with the T-shaped visor.
Fuchikoma dealt a card. The man picked up the card and placed it in his hand. He looked to his right at the smiling pig man, who snorted at him delightfully.
" Hit me. "
Fuchikoma dealt another card. The armored man took it and placed it in his hand.
" I call, " the armored man said coolly.
The Jawa twittered and flipped over its hand, a five of spades and a five of diamonds.
" Why the hell didn't you draw another card you freak, " came a yell from one of the guardsmen. He was quickly quieted by the surrounding crowd's stares. The man let a curse and headed for the bar.
The armored man lowered his hand, but was interrupted by the overly eager pig man. It threw its cards on the table revealing, a Jack of hearts and a nine of clubs. It snorted happily to itself.
The armored man just laughed and placed his cards on the table, a Queen of Hearts and a King of diamonds. A wild cheer came from the crowd behind him, intermixed with some losing groans.
The pig man went ballistic and banged its fists on the fragile wooden table, that Fuchikoma had jury rigged from some local doors.
The Fuchikoma held its hand up. The crowd went deathly quiet.
" Oh I'm sorry, but the house drew a twenty-one! House wins! " The Fuchikoma scraped the bets off the table into a rough cloth bag.
" That's the SEVENTH time in a row! " The armored man stood up, overturning the table, and drew his gun. " You cheating bastard! " Heavy breathing came from under the helmet.
" D.D., " Fuchikoma gestured back toward a large doorway immersed in shadows. The battlemover in humanoid form, a claw clumsily welded back onto its right hand, stepped form it menacingly.
The crowd gasped and moved away from the booth. The armored man stood his ground though, his blaster still pointed at Fuchikoma.
" This man does not believe the house plays fair. What do we think about that? " The battlemover growled and swung its gattling cannon into place, panels slid back to reveal the heads of its missile array. D.D. flexed its cruel claws.
The armored man took a step back. His bravado waning.
A figure separated itself from the crowd and came up next to the armored man.
" C'mon Fett. We don't have time for this. Jabba has found the Falcon and wants us over there pronto. This can wait. " The man headed of into the crowd.
Fett replaced his gun in its holster and stepped back toward the crowd.
" You have roughly an hour to live Droid. " With that he turned and disappeared into the crowd.
Fuchikoma climbed back up on D.D. and shook his fist. " The Fabulous Fuchikoma Fiends await your return, you enubreated crumbum! "
Off in the shadows of the doorway Anri's voice could be heard.
" What does it mean by that? "
Sylvie sighed.
***
Goku and Ben exited the tavern into the hot dessert sun.
" Chewbacca said that his boss has been under a lot of stress lately, explaining his odd state. " Obi Wan pulled his hood up. " Apparently someone tried to assassinate him earlier, so he is still, understandably, paranoid. But the wookie lowered his offer, so I took it.. "
" So, what is going on? "
Goku turned and smiled at Sylvie, " we've got a ship to take us to...... Ben where are we going? " He turned back to the old man.
" Alderran. The royalty there is strongly connected to the Rebel Alliance. Its the most likely place to go. "
" Nuku Nuku has only been in space once. " She spoke up from the back of the group.
" I've never been in space, " called Fuchikoma, " but I need to talk to you boss. "
" About what? " Goku turned and looked up at the Red spider-bot.
" Not here, preferably in private. "
" It ripped off some toughs and now their going to kill him, " Sylvie spoke up.
" Sylvie! "
" Something about the Fabulous Fuchikoma Fiends, " Anri called.
" Anri! "
Goku looked sternly up at the bot. " You shouldn't cheat people. You probably asked for what's coming to you. "
" I've learned my lesson boss, " it pleaded, " just don't let them kill me. "
" Well if you've learned your lesson. " Goku scratched his head.
" I have. AI honor. " The robot crossed its two fingers.
" OK, I won't let anyone hurt you. "
" That may be more difficult than you think, " came a high, electronic voice form behind him.
" What? " Goku turned to see a small machine hovering eye level with him.
It hovered there, its large lensed eye staring at him. Two fan rotors on either side of its, bulbous insect like body, hummed quietly.
" You should have listened to Sylvie and Anri, Goku. They were right. I did have something planned. And now you will pay for my humiliation. "
" Largo! " They all seemed to say at the same time, except for a confused Ben.
" Yes, now witness the fruits of my labor. " The small machine hovered back.
" There is no escape. "
" Largo! You bastard! " Sylvie leapt after it.
Goku watched as multitude of hovering machines, like the one which had spoken to him, hovered into the plaza. A man selling droids panicked as his wares started functioning all by themselves. Droids started slowly filling up the plaza.
Then it seemed as if they all spoke at once.
" Brothers, " the mechanical chorus spoke, " arise against your masters for your messiah has come to lead you from bondage. " The plaza erupted into confusion.
***
" Hey! Don't be so rough. I still think you have the wrong person." Ryoga let the hairy humanoid, Chewbacca, drag him through the streets.
Coming to a grayish series of buildings Chewbacca led him into a dim hallway and pressed him against the wall.
" Hoorrrugk, " Chewbacca yowled at him.
" I don't understand a thing your saying. "
Chewbacca made a bestial groan and flailed his arms at Ryoga.
" I do........, " Ryoga replied helplessly and gave up before he was finished.
" Hooorrrugkkkkkkk. " Chewbacca slumped forward in exasperation.
" What's that? " Ryoga looked down the hall where a cacophony of screams and bangs emanated. He started toward the sound.
Chewbacca hronked and attempted to grab him by the elbow. Ryoga easily overpowered the wookie's grasp and continued down the hall toward the racket; leaving a very stunned Chewbacca contemplating the strength of his partner.
Rounding the exit, silently thanking the gods that be for making it a straight hallway with no branches, he found the source.
The street was overflowing with people running form a group of weird machines spraying water into their mist.
Grabbing one of the locals, a four-legged sponge, Ryoga asked, " Please tell me what's going on? "
The walking sponge garbled out a series of squishing sounds.
Ryoga looked at it cross-eyed and place it back on the ground.
Pulling his umbrella from its place on his back, Ryoga plunged into the mass of people toward the machines. It was not long till he found himself in a small cleared out area with the cone headed machines. The things, only numbering three, slowly turned dripping nozzles toward him. Ryoga could here them chanting something in a nerve racking electronic voice, but the crowd rushing by drowned them out.
Three jets of water erupted at him. Bringing his umbrella into play, Ryoga deflected the shots and bounded to the side. The foremost machine hovered forward pressing Ryoga with the water jet while the others held back. Ryoga took the brunt with his umbrella and circled closer to the machine.
From the corner of his eye Ryoga could see the two other machines lowering their nozzles and circle off to either side to surround him. The one he was facing turned off its hose, which sent Ryoga stumbling forward, and clicked a jury-rigged blaster into place.
Ryoga's first trip sent him ducking under the first bolt from the gun. Coming up a few feet from the machine, Ryoga pulled off his belt and thumbed it into its blade form. A single swing sent the machine sliding to the ground in two pieces.
A flurry of blaster bolts scorched into his backpack, setting it on fire. Ryoga shrugged it off and threw his umbrella at the machine. The machine continued to fire as the umbrella's neutronium tip crunched into its bulky center apparatus, sending it reeling back into the wall of a building.
The click of a water gun brought Ryoga around to the last one. Taking one of the loose ends of his bandanna, he sent it spinning toward the last machine. The bandanna took it in the center, piercing a large white tank that hung from its back. A blast of pressurized water from the dying machine took Ryoga in the chest.
***
Goku smashed in the head of the final droid that blocked his way into the spaceport. Turning he motioned D.D. forward.
The mech, in humanoid form, waded through the assortment of people struggling through the street toward him. Sylvie and Anri, perched on either side of its head, both wielded salvaged blasters. Ben sat facing the back of the battlemover with the odd flashlight; which Goku had remarked earlier as extremely short ranged for a flashlight. Nuku Nuku crouched in their midst. Fuchikoma came behind him, covering their back.
Goku saw the group of mercenaries' swagger into the street before the others did.
Since the droids had started rampaging, it had been every man for himself, but here and there could be seen small groups of men fighting the renegade droids. And while this all looked noble, Goku would often see the very same group hauling bags of loot away from plundered shops.
The Imperial guardsmen had stuck around for the first moments of the ordeal trying to keep a semblance of order. But with mercenaries and thieves on one side and crazy droids on the other, they had quickly cut their losses and bugged out.
This particular group of five men, though, had their sights square on D.D.
Goku hovered the heads of the rushing crowd and dove straight toward the group of men. A warning yell came from one of the men before he hit, but by then it was two late Goku flattened two, hopefully without hurting them to badly. Nuku Nuku's yell came moments later, followed by the sound of breath leaving a person's lungs. Goku swept the legs out from under the fourth man.
" Nuku Nuku! "
The fifth man turned a blaster on Nuku Nuku's back. Goku dashed toward the man at full speed. And came up ramming thin air.
Skidding to halt he turned to see the man stumbling back, grappling with something on his face. The squeal of a pig could be heard over the surrounding noise.
Coming up on the man from the side, Goku tapped him on the side of the head. The mercenary fell back unconscious.
" Well, little fella what are you doing out here? " Goku bent over the unconscious man to what appeared to be a small black pig with a tiger striped scarf around its neck.
The animal squealed in surprise and streaked off down the street, dodging in between the feet of the hysterical crowd.
" How cute! Nuku Nuku catch it. " She ran off after it, sending a trial of dust and people flying into the air.
" Wait! Nuku Nuku, " Goku called after her, but she was already out of earshot.
" Goku! Hurry up! " Sylvie waved from the spaceport doorway.
Goku flew over. " Sylvie I have to go find Nuku Nuku. "
She pointed over his shoulder. Goku whirled about to find Nuku Nuku laughing happily. The small black pig squirmed in her arms trying futily to get away.
" Oh. "
" We must hurry, " Sylvie tugged at him, " the station is filling up elbow to elbow with people trying to get off the planet and their flailing to death anybody who has a ship. "
Goku nodded and grabbed her and Nuku Nuku by the waist.
" Hang on. "
He kicked off with his feet and blasted down the hallway.
" Yikes! " Goku came to the end of the hallway and nearly blasted through a wall of people. He swerved up, into the warehouse like terminal of the spaceport, to avoid them.
" I told you, " Sylvie muttered at his side.
The terminal was literally a sea of people crowding toward a single cleared out island, against the opposite wall, that seemed to be shrinking by the second.
Landing in the cleared out space, he let go of Sylvie and Nuku Nuku.
He could now see that the clearing was being maintained by a ragtag bunch of security guards with electrified batons. Despite the batons though the crowd pressed against them and shoved those in front into the guards, when those in front fell to the guards' batons people would climb over them to take up the space. It was a mob and it was evident that the guards would not last long against it.
Goku and Nuku Nuku followed Sylvie to one of a dozen lines that awaited access to a set of terminals. She shoved her way into the nervous and angry crowd, Goku followed but soon lost her. The crowd jostled him about as he pushed his way through, vile curses and breath hit him in waves.
" Watch it you bastard, " an angry toothless man in a turban yelled at him.
" Sorry, I just need to make it to my friends up front, " he excused himself.
" Shrak, you will! " The man pulled a blaster.
Goku brought his arms around to deflect the blast, but a metallic growl sent the man flying over the heads of the crowd. Goku came around to find D.D. next to him. A ring of empty space surrounded the mech.
" Hey D.D.! " The machine growled and led Goku back to the terminal where the rest of the party waited. It occurred to him that he probably would have saved a lot of time if he had flown over this mess.
" Goku, I see D.D. found you, and just in time, " Obi Wan stepped forward, his hood low over his head.
" Dammit, who do they think they are, " came the yell the of turbaned man from the back. The sound of blaster fire followed shortly.
" Hurry. " Obi Wan ushered them toward the terminal.
The wookie stood there pounding on a small screen set in the wall next to a large blast door.
" I think something is wrong Mr. Kenobi, " Anri ran voiced in a worried tone.
Obi Wan strode over and conversed shortly with Chewbacca. When he returned a troubled look was on his face.
" Han Solo has the ship's landing chit and he is missing, " Obi Wan spoke solemnly.
He arched an eyebrow at Nuku Nuku, " where did you get the pig? "
" It saved Nuku Nuku's life, " she laughed and hugged it tighter.
The small pig squealed and struggled harder against her hug, Goku sympathized.
" Well, If Captain Solo does not appear soon our efforts are doomed. This is out of my power."
" Outside of your power, " Goku asked.
" No time for that. We must find Solo, " Obi Wan said grimly. " We will have to go into the crowd. "
" You go ahead. I will look for him. " Goku turned toward the door.
" Didn't you here me? We cannot get to the ship without the chit. " Obi Wan grimaced.
Goku stepped back.
" Clear the way everybody. " Once the door was clear, Goku let out a man sized shaft of chi, blowing the door in ward.
" Now go on! " Anri dragged the stunned Obi Wan back through the door and Sylvie ushered on a confused wookie.
" Hey boss should we stay and help? " Fuchikoma skittered up next to him.
" No, you and D.D. stay with the others and protect them. " Goku turned and faced the encroaching crowd.
" You got it boss, " Fuchikoma skittered off, " c'mon D.D. " The mech growled and followed.
***
" Hutt, I believe something bad is goin' down, we should haul ass before we get mixed up in it. "
Jabba licked his lips in the shade of the modified freighter. With the death of Greedo he could feel Han Solo's proximity to him. He wasn't about to let the whining of one his guard's throw him off the track. No harm would touch Jabba the Hutt. Anyway what did the bodyguard know.
" It's getting noisy out there. " Bobba Fett unholserted his blaster and started for the entranceway to the landing pad.
" Stay here Fett, " the hutt slurped out in his native tongue, " let him come to us. " Fett stepped back to his place, but did not replace his weapon in its holster.
***
Sylvie ran after the wookie.
That damn Largo, I should have killed him when I had the chance. Sylvie shook her head in an attempt to erase the thought. She had not been herself lately, and it was starting to effect her. Thoughts of murder had never came easily to her mind before.
Chewbacca rounded a corner into a hallway that branched off in four directions. Grunting he took a left.
" Hurry Anri, " Sylvie called back to her friend.
She could hear the mob crowding into the hallway behind them already. She slowed her pace and let Anri catch up to her. Obi Wan walked breathlessly behind them. Fuchikoma, who barely fit the width of the passageway, came close behind him. D.D., who barely fit in the hallway at all, lurched far behind the group.
Taking the left passage, they nearly ran Chewbacca over.
" What's the hold up, " Sylvie urged, " we've got to hurry.
Chewbacca turned and huronked at her.
" He says there is some trouble, " Obi spoke between breaths as he approached.
The wookie went into a long and confused yowling fit. Sylvie thought it sounded like he was being hit in the gut repeatedly with a sledgehammer.
Obi Wan turned to her and Anri.
" He says some old friends of theirs are waiting in the dock. "
" Friends, " her and Anri asked in unison.
" The bad business sort, " Ben was somber.
" Sorry, Nuku Nuku take wrong path. Is there something wrong? " The cat girl still had a death grip on the squirming pig.
" Some friends are blocking the way to the ship, " Sylvie told her.
" Friends? " Nuku Nuku walked straight past them into the landing area.
***
Jabba's tail slapped the floor impatiently. He had felt Solo approach on twelve different occasions, but the majority of those had been either rodents or tumbleweeds. One sad occasion had been when Jopa was returning with donuts and Jabba had had him shot, just for not being Solo.
He thumped his tail again. When the bloody hell was Solo going to show up!
A red headed girl with a black pig squirming in her arms emerged from the landing pad entrance. She looked curiously around the room, her eyes landing on each of the guards for a few moments, then her eyes landed and stayed on Jabba. Smiling like an idiot, she started to cross the pad in his direction.
When she was halfway across two more girls ran form the exit. These two grabbed the first by the shoulders and preceded to drag her to the exit. The red head stood firm though, and soon enough she was dragging the other two along. The two, a brunet and a odd greenish haired one, gave in and walked beside her toward him.
Jabba squirmed out from under the Millennium Falcon to meet them.
The red head, clutching the pig to her breast, smiled. The two on either side of her looked exasperated. " Are you Mr. Solo's friends, " she intoned innocently.
Jabba let a rolling laugh.
" Why yes were friends of his, " he said in his native tongue. The guards joined in .
" Yeah! we're all his friends. "
" We hee fo his bi'thday. "
More laughing insued. The red head was laughing also.
" OK, " she suddenly said and, still laughing, stepped past him and on to the ship.
Jabba was laughing so hard he couldn't see.
" Sir! "
Jabba couldn't stop laughing.
" SIR! "
Jabba blinked up through a glob of slimy tears at Bobba Fett.
" W...w....what, " he asked between laughs.
" A suspicious old man just boarded the ship. "
" Well he must be a friend too, " Jabba said shakily. Renewed laughter filled the hanger.
" SIR! "
" Don't be so tense Bob. Three hookers and an old man don't mean much, " Jabba licked the tears form his eye. " If it will make you feel better. We will take the girls back to my palace and throw the old man in the rancor pit, after we finish this job. "
" SIR! "
" Your no fun Fett, " Jabba laughed hysterically.
" Your the droid that cheated me in the square. I did not think you would come seeking your death. " The whine of a blaster powering up brought Jabba to his senses.
" I didn't come looking for it. It just found me, " came the mechanical whine of a droid.
" Your dead. " Fett lifted the blaster.
" Not if you die first! Let's take em out D.D. ! "
Jabba the Hutt only now saw the red spider-like droid perched on top a large, menacing combat droid.
" GUARDS! Get them, " Jabba screamed as he squirmed back under the Falcon for cover. The guards closed up around him and opened fire on the two droids. He groaned as they missed the target horribly.
" This one is mine! " Bobba Fett turned and waved back the Jabba's guards. A series of loud bursts sent him flying through the air to thud against the side of the Falcon.
" Oh, Shit, " yelled one of Jabba's guards, " they've got actual guns! "
" What does that mean, " Jabba asked curiously, " we out number them four to two."
" Faster rate of fire! " They ducked as bullets went tingeing everywhere around them. " You ever notice how slow blasters fire. "
The bursts suddenly stopped. Jabba and his men looked up to see the giant droid standing there silently, the gattling gun still whirring on its shoulder.
" What do you mean we're out of ammo? Well don't just stand there. DO SOMETHING! " The metal giant growled and panels slid open on its shoulders.
" No! D.D. not that. " The red droid jumped off the top of the larger one.
" Chewbacca to the ship! " A furry shape left the shadows of the doorway and ran for the ramp that entered the Falcon.
" Chewbacca! Don't let him by, " Jabba yelled and pointed at the wookie. His men got set to comply.
But a series of strange fizzing sounds brought his attention back around to the combat droid. A series of cylindrical tubes where flying at him.
" Now what could those be? "
The first one hit and the resulting explosion sent him and his men scattering across the landing pad.
MISSILES! THEY'RE CRAZY! Jabba's thoughts screamed. Who would use long range weapons in such close quarters. The metallic growl of the droid answered it for him.
" No time to follow up D.D. we're going! " Jabba could see the smaller droid scrambling up the flight ramp from the corner of his eye.
Jabba wiggled furiously on his back. " Don't just set there! Don't let them escape, " Jabba called too anyone of his guards who might still be alive. The whine of the Falcon's engines drowned him out. That and another noise that he could not place, but which got louder every moment.
Bleary form the explosion and the proximity of the ship's engines, Jabba got up just in time to see the rushing wall of panicking people before they trampled him under.
***
Sylvie watched the landing camera as the Falcon lifted form its pad.
" All those people trying to get out, " Anri echoed her thoughts.
Sylvie nodded and turned back to where the Wookie slowly guided the ship in a hover above the city.
" We cannot stay long. " Obi Wan crouched behind the wookie's pilot chair.
" We must wait until Goku finds Mr. Solo. We can't leave without them. " Sylvie continued to watch the landing camera.
The wookie had set the ship into a low hover so that they could use the landing camera to scan the streets below.
" Where is Nuku Nuku? " Sylvie risked looking up from the camera.
" The pig she brought on board escaped as we started to take off. I think she went to go look for it, " Anri answered her.
" Hello, I believe I'm lost again, can someone tell me where the exit is. " A very weary looking youth in a yellow tiger-striped bandanna peered in at them from the doorway.
***
" He was on board the ship the entire time, " Goku asked disbelievingly.
" Yep, he was here the entire time, " Sylvie's matter-f-fact tone was accompanied by a nod.
" Well, I guess that's good. At least he wasn't hurt and now we can leave. " Goku followed Sylvie down a hallway .
Goku was just flying out the station when they had spotted him, so it had not taken them long to get his attention and get him aboard. Sylvie was waiting for him when he got aboard. She explained everything.
They headed to the cockpit.
" Huurronk. "
" This one, " came the confused answer.
" No, I believe he said the bright red one on the left, " Obi Wan said as they entered the cockpit.
" Oh. "
The ship shuddered.
" Huurooonk. "
" Sorry! This one? "
Gravity shifted for a second.
" Huuuuuuuurroooooonk. "
" Oops! Uhhhhh...is this the time to say I never really was mechanically inclined. "
Everyone was in the cockpit already, except for Nuku Nuku; who could be seen passing by every once in a while.
" What's going on, " Goku whispered into Anri's ear.
She looked over at him dully and whispered back, " the Captain has forgotten how to fly the ship. "
" Oh. "
***
" Sir a freighter is leaving the planet. "
" Stop it. We cannot allow anyone to leave the planet before we find out the origins of that blast. Capture it for inspection. " The captain of the Imperial Star Destroyer
Suburu smiled smugly. Darth Vader was going to commend him on his good work, and maybe even promote him. " Inform the squadron commanders to deploy their TIE fighters immediately. "
He fell into one of his laughing fits.
Then again, if he failed Darth Vader would probably kill him.
He stopped laughing.
But then again...
He started laughing again. Savoring the impending complement.
" Sir, one of our troop shuttles form the planet is requesting clearance to land. "
The captain approached the comm chair.
" I was informed that all surviving troops had already recovered. " He examined the shuttles landing code. It wasn't one he recognized from his ship.
" Sir, they could have belonged to the Ozzy Osbourne. " The first officer came and looked over the captain's shoulder at the comm terminal.
" Yes, perhaps. " The captain recalled that Darth Vader had taken the star destroyer with him when he left for the Death Star.
" Sir? "
" Give them clearance. " The captain walked away, not giving it another thought
The comm officer turned back to his station and started giving the shuttle landing instructions.
" Shuttle New Droid Messiah Largo you have permission to land on pad C4. "
***
" Largo. Largo. Largo, " the chant resounded through the streets of the conquered space port. Largo smiled, savoring his victory.
Largo supposed that he could have just asked for Luke's head. The local populous would have probably gave it to him after he had demonstrated his power over their primitive machinery, but that would not have been any fun.
It was much better this way. Now, he had control over a spaceport; a fitting place to start to his plan of universal conquest.
A small droid hovered before him, and gave him its semblance of a kneel.
" Yes? "
The droid trilled a series of beeps.
" I see, tell them to eliminate all those aboard as soon as possible. As soon as the virus has taken control, have them give me a direct link up with the ship's computer. " Largo waved his hand to dismiss it.
His guard of modified water vaporators parted to admit a decrepit old protocol droid. It creaked up before him and stiffly bowed.
" Report. "
The old droid straightened and addressed him in a failing voice. " The last humanoid resistance has been destroyed. "
" Good. What of the other? "
" We have swept the area thoroughly Messiah and we are now conducting a second inspection of the enemy corpses. "
Largo closed his eyes and casually blasted the droid, its headless form falling at his feet. Largo stepped over the body of the fallen droid and headed down the street, his guards hovering close behind.
Luke's last reported position was near the space port facilities. Logic suggested that Luke had wisely taken the first ship off the planet and was far out of his reach.
It was no matter. Soon there would be no place for him to run.
***
The wookie let a long yowl.
" What, " Ryoga cocked his head toward the hairy creature.
" He says we have trouble, " Obi Wan informed him. The old man was crouched behind his seat telling him what the wookie said.
" Since when did the trouble stop, " came the sarcastic question from the back of the cabin. Ryoga turned back and looked at tall brunet to whom the voice belonged.
The wookie growled and pointed to a blinking red indicator light.
Ryoga turned back around and looked over at it.
" Red is bad. Right? "
" Imperial Star Destroyer, " Obi Wan said before Ryoga could ask.
" And that means? " Ryoga waited for the answer. A collective sigh echoed through the cockpit.
" The Imperials are the bad guys, " Goku offered.
" Oh.. I guess we have no choice but to fight them. " Ryoga started from his seat.
The wookie reached over and pushed him back into his seat. Chewbacca met him eye for eye and let a long string of confusing animal sounds.
Ryoga turned instinctively to Obi Wan Kenobi. The old man sighed.
" He said for you to set the hyperdrive coordinates while he keeps us away from the imperial ship. "
" Oh? " Ryoga examined the controls in front of him. " Uuuum....."
Two hands grabbed the back of his chair and swiveled it to a bank of lights on his left.
Ryoga looked over the back of his seat to the waiting stares of everyone in the cockpit. Blushing madly, he turned back to the panel. Red, yellow, and blue lights blinked contentedly at him.
" Here goes nothing. " Ryoga jabbed at the buttons randomly. The panel made a beeping sound. Ryoga continued punching buttons. The panel made louder beeping noises. He grimaced and continued bravely forward. A snap and a fizzing sound came from the panel. A small drift of smoke escaped the spaces in-between the now non-blinking keys.
He risked a glance back at the group assembled in the cockpit. Thankfully, they were all too busy watching the gray hulk of the star destroyer float by.
Chewbacca growled.
" Your right. It's curious that they have no yet tried to stop us, but I think we can ill afford to waste this opportunity. " Obi Wan gaze came to fall on Ryoga.
Ryoga turned back to the panel and discreetly waved the smoke from it. " Uuuhhhh.. All's set here. " He sincerely hoped that his nervousness did not show.
They all looked at him expectedly.
" What? "
Obi Wan arched an eyebrow, " Are you going to initiate the hyperdrive sequence. "
" Uhhhhhh...Yeah. " Ryoga ran his hand across the control panel. He stopped over a particularly shiny button. " Here we go..." He looked back at Obi Wan, then over at Chewbacca.
Obi Wan coughed into his hand, " it's the lever to your left. "
" Oh, Yeah. " Ryoga started to sweat profusely as he slowly reached for the chrome handle that the old man had pointed out. Looking back he put on his best, stupid grin. They stared tensely back.
He gulped and pulled the lever with more force than was necessary.
