Hi to the FFML, Another week, another list. ^_^ Here's the latest batch, and sorry that two stories were missed due to being unable to locate them. They will be added to next week's list. Paul M. Arezina Helen Szeto Shunsuke ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The FFML Synopses List ====================== For the week of: August 15 - 21, 1998 Synopses Submitted: 36 This list is sorted by series, and within each series, ordered alphabetically, according to last names. The synopses here represent whatever has been sent to us, from Saturday to Friday. * * * * * [Bubblegum Crisis] - - - - - Title: BG Cross - Chapter 18: Closer To The Heart Series: BubbleGum Crisis Genre: What If? Original Flavor Author: Andy Skuse Email: askuse@lonet.ca Homepage: http://www.Lonet.ca/res/askuse/bgcross/bgcross.htm Date Sent to FFML: August 21 1998 Size: 19k Summary: The meeting ends, Linna and Priss wonder what's up with Nene, Sylia schedules training at Raven's Garage, Mackie and Nene finally start their date and V7-28 begins his search for Blackie. {Shunsuke} I haven't read the earlier parts, so I can only comment on what I see here. (Gimme a break, I'm busy! ^_^) I like the tone and feel, and the pacing is good although Leomund's pensiveness was little overdone. (*Just* a touch less, thank you.) The author has got the male-female thing down right (I suppose you have been treated like this by girls before? ^_^) My only complaint is that the chapters are too darned short!!! A tad longer please. - - - - - Title: Knowing You [Teaser] Series: Bubblegum Crisis Genre: Psychodrama Author: David Johnston Email: rgorman@telusplanet.net Date Sent to FFML: Aug 21 1998 Size: 5 kb Summary: Sylia appears to be captured and at Mason's mercy. But what does Mason really want from her? {Shunsuke} Unlike most teasers which are complete chapters unto themselves, this reads more like a scene extracted from a story. When teasers are longer, you tend to get a feel for the whole story and decide right then whether to continue with the series. This one isn't like that. There's a hint of what's going on, but not enough to give the game away. There's a subtle suggestion of the possibilities - torture, submission, possibly even willingness on the part of Sylia. I can't recall any of this author's previous work so I can't comment on his storytelling, but this snippet makes me want to read more. * * * * * [Dragonball] - - - - - Title:Average Citizens Series:Dragonball Genre:Short-Fic Author:Murmur the Fallen Email:harijubal@aol.com Homepage:none as yet Date Sent to FFML:Aug 23 Size:not that large Summary: Two friends, Hiro and Daisu, drink beer and watch the TenkaichiBudokai on TV. {Paul} Interesting. Rather the reaction I had when I first watched Dragonball...makes you think about all those nameless people that got brushed aside when explosions happened. And it was funny enough that I didn't care. 8 of 10 on the short scale. * * * * * [Mega/Crossover] - - - - - Title: A World Without A Future; Final Series: SM, TM!, BGC, YUA, DC Comics, etc... Genre: Dark, Post Apocalyptic Futuristic Horror Author: Adam Christopher Leigh Email: Omicron@sprynet.com Homepage: http://dogbert.simplenet.com/Tempest/fiction.html Date Sent to FFML: August 22, 1998 Size: 74k Summary: The Sailor Scouts were working to bring about a Utopia, the Crystal Tokyo of everyone's dreams. They Failed. This is the future, a world reeling from the impact of an Asteroid that hit the Pacific Ocean 20 years ago, a city named after a once prosperous one, isolated from the blizzard in a large cylindrical column. Americans, Japanese, Chinese, Jurains, wrapped together in over 40 million tons of decaying metal, all alone in the cold. The fourth day brings nothing but hardship as the two groups finally meet only to find they have conflicting goals. Things are only. . . [SNIP] {Paul} THIS is the END?! This is the first chapter of an ongoing miniseries. You gave a rather nice closure to the first installment, though... and I felt like I was right beside the characters through the whole thing. 17 or 18 out of 20, because I can't stand final episodes which really aren't that final... - - - - - Title: Kaleidoscope - Parts 3 and 4 Series: Yu Yu Hakusho/ Dragonball Genre: crossover Author: Rhionae Email: rhionae@hotmail.com Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Island/3226/ Date Sent to FFML: 17/8, 23/8 Size: 14kb, 11kb Summary: Goten and Trunks have landed up in the YYH world - which leads to trouble as there's a powerful youkai on the loose... Sequel to Allegiance. {Shunsuke} This is a reasonable and good continutation from parts one and two, although I was confused for a minute by the telling of events from two different points of view at the start of part three. The writing is short and sparse, but still complete and tells everything going on with few words. This kind of stuff is nice to read. - - - - - Title:Ranma vs. The world. 1-10 Series:Ranma/Street fighter Genre:X-over Author:Catbert25 Email:Catbert25@juno.com Homepage: Date Sent to FFML:8/25 Size: Summary: Its been called the finest Ranma/SF cross over ever written. Ranma loses a battle in his home arena to Ryu. He follows to learn the techique that defeated him with Ryoga in tow. Lots of apperances from various SF games Including Street fighter EX and the Alpha series. {Shunsuke} It reads like the writer is doing a chapter for each stage of a video game, matching Ranma or Ryouga against oppoonents a player would face as they play. Aside from that, there's nothing remarkable here, and this set of pieces suffer from the writer's regular half-finished style. It's rough going trying to read this, with no flow or style to the language. - - - - - Title: Future Perfect - book 1, part 4 Series: Megacrossover Genre: Comic drama Author: Scott Schimmel Email: schimmel@seas.upenn.edu Homepage: http://www.seas.upenn.edu/~schimmel/writing/writing.html Date Sent to FFML: August 20, 1998 Size: ~24K Summary: (series) Someone, or something, is altering the past, and it's causing the future to change. Can an eclectic group of characters realize what's happening in time to prevent it? (chapter) Cologne and Madoka Mano describe a possible threat. Tenchi, Kyousuke, and Madoka Ayukawa spend some time together. Akane Kasuga comes to Tokyo. The future begins to change. {Shunsuke} I know what's going on already...this time I ain't tellin'! ^_^ With the author's foreshadowing and some knowledge of sci-fi movies you should be able to figure out the plot. It reads as being a little thin, but the way events are presented make it worthwhile. On the downside, it might have been better to stagger the character introductions instead of presenting them all at once. As it stands, the reading can be a bit muddled if the characters aren't doing anything yet (ie, the MB chara); waiting until they are ready to do something would make the storyline easier for readers to remember. Still, I like it so far. - - - - - Title: The Angel that just won't die Series: Ranma 1/2 and Neon Genesis Evangelion Genre: Crossover Author: Jeffrey "OneShot" Wong Email: jeffwong@li.net Homepage: http://www.li.net/~jeffwong/index.htm Date Sent to FFML: Aug 23rd 1998 Size: 255kbs Summary: A sequel to my 'The boomer that just won't die' fanfic. No real need to read said fanfic. Ranma accidentally ends up in the EVA universe. There, he soon becomes an asset to Nerv for his powers help significantly in their battle against the Angels. What will happen when he meets the EVA cast? What will he do when Misato takes a certain interest in him? How will he react when he meets Asuka as she starts insulting him? Will he be able to teach his special powers to people living in a world in desperate need if it? How will Gendo act when Ranma calls him a 'dick' ;) {Shunsuke} This reads like an early draft, not a finished piece of work. It needs a *lot* of rewriting and paring down of scenes to remove the redundancies, events that occur two, three, even four times without ever moving the plot along, and textual or grammatical redundancies and mistakes that make some sections confusing at best, unreadable at worst. The final battle is indicative of this; it suddenly happens, with no buildup or climax. Sorry to say this, especially considering the author and his past work, this one is definitely not worth the time it takes to read it, not unless it goes through a *major* rewrite. * * * * * [Neon Genesis Evangelion] - - - - - Title: Neon Genesis Evangelion: Other Paths - Prologue Series: Neon Genesis Evangelion Genre: Action/Drama/Humour Author: James Grabowski Email: sephirius@japan.crosswinds.net Homepage: http://www.crosswinds.net/japan/~sephirius Date Sent to FFML: August 18, 1998 Size: 36K Summary: The day of the Unit Zero reactivation experiment is at hand. Everyone has their own concerns, expectations, and agendas about the experiment. However, total failure was not expected. With the end result being a severe injury to the Sub-Commander of NERV, and a near fatal experience for the pilot of Unit Zero, it becomes imperative that a new pilot be found to activate the dormant Unit One, the Third Child. The reason unknown to the child, he is summoned to Tokyo-3 by his father. He chooses to obey, never imagining the kind of fate awaiting him. [This part was reviewed in the previous list. It was apparently added to this week's list by mistake.] - - - - - Title: Garden of EVA 0:4 - Rei Bites! Series: EVA Genre: Aternate universe Author: Jim Lazar Email: jimlazar@earthlink.net Homepage: http://home.earthlink.net/~jimlazar/anime Date Sent to FFML: 8/20/98 Size: 18K Summary: A bitting series set within episode 26 of Neon Genesis Evangelion. In Part 3 Rei tests SHinji with a grand view of her panties. Misato and Shinji have a heart to heart after Shinji was cought with his pants down, literaly in the last part. Just who is that man fixing the vending machine that Shinji is trying to avoid and why is Misato standing around naked in Shinji's kitchen? {Shunsuke} This is very odd. I can't tell if this is a parody, an alternate reality, or weird fantasy of the author, and I'm not so sure he knows either. O_o Still, it has it's moments, and is funny at times. In this part the author is going far beyond the innuendo and soft ecchi stuff of the first three parts, going right up to the limits of lemon. I have seen better fics, and I've seen far worse. ^_^ - - - - - Title:Spirit within part 3 Series:Evangelion Genre:Self insertion Author:Catbert25 Email:Catbert25@juno.com Homepage: Date Sent to FFML:8\24 Size: Summary: A third sequel in the Spirit within series. In this installment the author is merged with Shinji. A now super powerful martial artist, Shinji takes a much more agressive approach to life, he also has knowledge of comming events. Unfortunately, as its the basis for this series, things never turn out the way there supposed to... Shinji awakes after his mediocre first attempt at piloting an Eva. He ends up going home with Misato after a confrontation in the hospital with his father, this is due to the fact that his Jusenkyo curse was reactivated in the enty plug, turning him into a girl. Misato is sceptical and is developing a dislike for the boy and his attitude, but [SNIP] [The story could not be located on the FFML archive; it will be added to the next list.] * * * * * [Original] - - - - - Title: Kichi! Episodes 2 and 3 Series: Original Genre: Fantasy-esque Author: Erin Ellis Email: ee970@hotmail.com Homepage: members.tripod.com/~tina97/kichi Date Sent to FFML: August 8 Size: For eps 2 and 3, 15 and 20k, respectively Summary: In Episode 2, Samantha finds herself in a new world populated by people with pointy ears that tend to either think of her as a god, or shoot at her (and more of the latter). She and Kichi meet up with a Red Mage, Tenzil, and flee the GateWay Temple together. Then, in Ep. 3, they do more running. We meet the Emperor, who is set on capturing the group, and Sam demands to know the other two's histories, though Tenzil and Kichi are less than excited about revealing their pasts... {Paul} Is it a good thing or a bad thing when you've gotten to the point where you can be 95% confident how the characters will act? Depends on whether they're stereotyped or whether you know them. I think it's the latter. Good work on this, and on the descriptions of the world. Nicely open ended; I still have absolutely NO idea where you're going to go with this, and the ending is a nice example of a cliffhanger which doesn't leave the audience raving for more. I'll say 14 or 15 out of 20. - - - - - Title:Magical girl flash! part 9 Series:Original Genre:Original Author:Catbert25 Email:Catbert25@juno.com Homepage: Date Sent to FFML: Size: Summary: A parody of Magical girl Anime such as Sailor moon, Pretty sammy, and Magic Knight Rayearth. Tsuki Hikari a normal high school delinquent becomes a champion of justice known as Seishin star. She has to deal with alien invaders, school problems, crazed martial artist, her friends, a talking cat mentor named Sasha, a relatively cute guy named Hibiki who every one thinks is her boyfriend, and her retired Seishin Grandmother. And this one's only getting started! In this Chapter Seishin star fights a giant mutant slime with the help of the new Seishin fire. The only problem is Seishin fire is a complete air head. A father and daughter team of reporters get in on the [SNIP] {Shunsuke} You can add Hyperdolls to the list of magical girls parodied. This is better than most of the author's efforts, though some of the usual problems with language occur. It doesn't seem to be heading toward a point, more like an episode of a series interchangeable with any other. Maybe it's just me, but this didn't do anything for me. * * * * * [Ranma 1/2] - - - - - Title: Confession Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Author: Lord Archive Email: archive@mich.com Homepage: www.mich.com/~archive Date Sent to FFML: 8-17 Size: 18K Summary: Akane tells Ranma why the Tendos are so messed up {Shunsuke} While this isn't *bad*, this story doesn't really seem much more than a way to explain character behaviours. It doesn't cover any new ground or explore anything. The WAFFy element of bringing the two arguers together is pleasant enough. - - - - - Title: Sword and Sorcery, chapter 19 Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Fantasy Author: D.Fire Email: phongb9@idt.net Homepage: http://idt.net/~phongb9/ Date Sent to FFML: August 18, 1998 Size: 28kb Summary: Raeni takes a moment to go over her general situation and is given a clue to the way out of her predicament. Meanwhile, the battle outside the shadow realm between Uerris and the Assassin comes to a climax, but who will be the victor? {Shunsuke} As before, this has nice pacing and the scenes and events make sense. The author gives you enough to know where you are and what happens next, but not enough to give the game away. It's nice to see such consistency. ^_^ - - - - - Title: Genma and Souun Write a Fic Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Humor Author: Scott K. Jamison (SKJAM!) Email: majks@cyberx.com Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Flats/5990 Date Sent to FFML: 082298 Size: Summary: The fathers write their own conclusion to the series... {Shunsuke} You know, sadly there are fics like this (sans the comments). I can't tell if this is just bandwagon jumping by the author or a witty criticism of bad writing in general. Either way, this is probably the best of this ridiculous thread. - - - - - Title: For Every Action (Compilation of 1-13) Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Original Flavour Author: David Johnston Email: rgorman@telusplanet.net Date Sent to FFML: 19 Aug 1998 Size: 68 kb Summary: Akane has been given Ranma's curse in reverse and must deal with many of his problems. {Paul} First, it would have been nice to know that this was intended as a sequel to... to... oh, I forgot the title! But I know I read a story where onna-Ranma was affianced because of her prowess in rhythmic gymnastics, and that this certainly SEEMS like the sequel to it. Second... oh, lordy. I'm beginning to suspect that Bead is actually Mizu in extreme disguise, but I don't know for certain yet... and Akane's in pretty deep, isn't she? Amazing that Ranma hasn't been jumping for joy more... after all, his curse IS gone, isn't it? He must be a lot more worried about Akane than he lets on. All in all, a very interesting story... 15 or 16 out of 20. - - - - - Title: Shadows on the Wall Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Horror Author: Ronny Hedin Email: thark@hem2.passagen.se Homepage: http://nabiki.newberry.edu/thark/fanfic/#shadowsonthewall Date Sent to FFML: 98-08-22, 22:55 GMT+1 Size: 35k Summary: A tale of Lovecraftian cosmic horror in the Ranmaverse. Akane falls terminally ill, but soon, that it the least of Ranma's worries - and why does Dr. Tofuu's glasses really fog up around Kasumi? Told in first-person by our favorite pig-tailed martial artist. {Shunsuke} Lovecraft-ian? No, this reads more like the plot and script of the game "Phantasmagoria". The way the story is told isn't too bad, and I like the buildup toward the doomed battle at the end. But there's two things about this that really didn't work: the profanity early in the story dropped off and never came back. If the author wasn't going to continue with the same tone of language, why introduce it at all? Second, during the battle the style of language and writing changed abruptly to a pseudo-CAS style for no explicable reason; if Ranma starts writing one way, why would he change so suddenly unless the author is suggesting that Ranma is the cause of all the problems. Overall, this was good, but it needs fine tuning. - - - - - Title: Hearts and Minds Prelude 5 - Tendo Akane: Something Old [revised] Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Continuation Author: Gary Kleppe Email: kleppe@execpc.com Homepage: http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics.html Date Sent to FFML: 8/19 Size: 34 kb Summary: Ranma and Akane make plans to marry, and decide to avoid all of the usual places for the ceremony. An old acquaintance of Akane's turns up. Who is Ondori Koichi, and why does he want to meet up with Akane after all these years? Also, Soun cooks! Is this a sign of the apocalypse? {Shunsuke} Well, this is a little different from the earlier parts. It looks like the author is going beyond the simple "flashbacks and where we are now" stories, and moving on to the meat of the story he's been setting up for. Now, some people are going to say "Shampoo won't give up that easy", but that's the author's take on it and it's made plausible here. The writing flows and is sensible if unspectacular. - - - - - Title: Konatsu Masquerade Soliloquy: Ranma Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Sadfic Author: Ukyou Kuonji Email: ukyoukwnji@aol.com Homepage: http://members.aol.com/ukyoukwnji/ Date Sent to FFML: August 13, 1998 Size: 7 Kb Summary: After Ranma and Akane get married, Ukyou settles for Konatsu, dressed up as Ranma... or is that really who she sees? {Paul} Whoa. Just... whoa. It seems so... well, I don't doubt that it's something Konatsu would DO for Ukyo, but I do doubt that it's something Nerima's resident lady of okonomiyaki would want done. Then again... *proceeds to recall passages from the first book of the Shadow Chronicles*... maybe it's not all that unlikely after all. Very nicely written... so much as I know of Konatsu's character comes through splendidly here. 10 of 10. - - - - - Title: Konatsu Masquerade Soliloquy: Ukyou Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Sadfic Author: Ukyou Kuonji Email: ukyoukwnji@aol.com Homepage: http://members.aol.com/ukyoukwnji/ Date Sent to FFML: August 17, 1998 Size: 9 Kb Summary: Is it an honor for Konatsu to be promoted to Ukyou's equal? Or is there an ulterior motive involved? {Paul} This one seems to be a little bit more reasonable... though wouldn't people notice that "Ukyo" shrunk a bit? Ah well, who am I to question the perception of customers? Again, very nicely written... poetic, in a sense. And another 10 of 10. - - - - - Title: Doors Best Left Unopened Part 11 Series: Ranma Genre: Serious/Darkish Author: Mark MacKinnon Email: emmack@ibm.net Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Ginza/8225 Date Sent to FFML: August 23/98 Size: 120K Summary: Strange alliances form as events begin to move in unanticipated directions. Nabiki makes a scene (of sorts) at school. Ryouga and Ukyou kick back after work. Reiko decides to enlist Ryouga's aid with her mysterious quest, unaware that Riana has set Wynneth on her trail. Kunou reveals more of his family's past, and Kasumi finally goes on her date. {Paul} Half of this story reads like an original work. Are your demons based on some mythology, or are they all your own creations? Ah well, it matters very little; they, too, are very well-defined characters, and the interactions between them are at least as meaningful as the interactions between the Ranma cast. And speaking of which... PLANS! WE GOT PLANS! If I ever doubted that Nabiki could worm her way out of anything, this chapter sort of dispelled those doubts. I'm still trying to peg Reiko as good or self-serving, and her little fiasco with Ryoga didn't help any. Speaking of... Ryoga's life is changing, in direction if not magnitude, to match that of his "The More Things Change" counterpart. The Kunos-as- defenders-of-light subplot is moving along nicely... Kuno still speaks like he did before, but the mind behind the words is vastly different. This chapter focuses a little more on the person-person interaction than on the whole good-evil thing...not to say that confrontations don't happen, but they happen in the background of exposition and character development. 18 or 19... heck, maybe even 20 out of 20. - - - - - Title: Ranma-chan, Chapter 1 Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Drama Author: Luigi Mattera Email: mattera@tiac.net Homepage: http://www.tiac.net/users/mattera/anime/rc Date Sent to FFML: August 21, 1998 Size: 55k Summary: A freak accident leaves Ranma with no memory of his past and the belief that he happens to be a girl. Reposted in a new draft. {Shunsuke} This one is hard to read. It has a lot of short sentences. Like these. And that makes the pace *very* sluggish. Like a car with fuel line problems. The plot in this one doesn't tell anything new, anything that we haven't seen before, almost exactly the same plot as the "Am I Pretty?" TV episode but with different locations and events. So much of this becomes redundant and would be better as about 10K at the start of the real story. (Read "Clothes Make The..." to see what I mean.) - - - - - Title: Wishing Upon the Same Star Pt. 3 Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Original Flavor Author: Megane 6.7 Email: fcasper@yesic.com Homepage: http://members.xoom.com/RyanMercury/megfics.html http://members.xoom.com/RyanMercury/megane.html Date Sent to FFML: 8/17/98 Summary: Ranma and Shampoo have a hot encounter in the shower at Furinkan High which leads to Ranma being blackmailed by Shampoo. Meanwhile, Kodachi has an encounter of her own with a mysterious stranger while Ryouga gets treated for heat stroke by Dr. Tofu leading to a startling revelation for the reader. [See the following story for a combined review.] - - - - - Title: Wishing Upon the Same Star Pt. 4 Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Original Flavor Author: Megane 6.7 Email: fcasper@yesic.com Homepage: http://members.xoom.com/RyanMercury/megfics.html http://members.xoom.com/RyanMercury/megane.html Date Sent to FFML: 8/19/98 Summary: It just isn't Ranma's day as Shampoo finally manages to blackmail Ranma into dating her and a furious Mousse attacks him. Then Nabiki gets a piece of the action leaving Ranma in dire straits until an old friend decides to step in. Meanwhile, Akane finally gets her revenge against Kunou and Ryouga's wish is finally reveiled to an astonished Dr. Tofu. {Paul} Hmm. One wonders if Ryoga will have sense enough to use his new-found powers to spy on Ranma. Nah. One wonders if Ryoga will find out what Shamps and Ukyo did to Ranma (showered with and kissed him, respectively) and go off on a "Vengeance"-style tangent. Nah. One wonders if Ranma's two dates will actually help him get to the crux of his romantic problems. Nah. One wonders if this story could fit within the confines of the manga. Hmm... could be. In all seriousness, these were two very nicely written chapters... the sexual side of the Ranmaverse isn't explored as often in non-lemon fics. And it's nice to know someone actually thinks that Ryoga is trying to do his best to be a decent human being. 17 or 18 out of 20. - - - - - Title: Monkey Head Butting Part 8 Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Comedy Author: M A Davis / Miko Email: Belldandy@angelic.com Homepage: http://listen.to/bell/ Date Sent to FFML: Friday, August 21, 1998 9:12 PM Size: 34k Summary: Ranma is Akane. Akane is Ranma. Nabiki is broke. Nabiki, however, holds the key to solving all three problems... and the key to creating MORE problems. Meanwhile, we have a cooking challenge between Ranma and Happosai to resolve. It doesn't even have "martial arts" in the title, so can Ranma win? {Paul} Oooh, Nabiki is being a MEEEAN widdle kid! To tell the truth, your portrayal of her is somewhat less than flattering... then again, she's likely the ONLY member of the cast (save Happy) likely to use that brooch for anything even remotely resembling personal gain, so I suppose the persona must be tailored to fit the role. Though the jury's still out on whether Nabiki will do ANYTHING given sufficient money, I doubt she has any problems with taking liberties with someone else's body. Ranma is starting to get desperate to get himself back... being locked in a girl's body is a lot more severe than just turning into one. And wasn't it Musashi who said that all life can be patterned after the Art? Ranma certainly demonstrates THAT much. All in all, 17 or 18 out of 20. I confess I've read ahead, and the next chapter makes this one seem a bit dim by comparison. - - - - - Title: Best Man Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Short and apparently WAFFy? Author: M A Davis / Miko Email: belldandy@angelic.com Homepage: http://listen.to/bell/ Date Sent to FFML: Tuesday, August 18, 1998 7:12 PM Size: 9k Summary: Two short scenes before Ranma and Akane's wedding. It seems the Best Man has become lost... {Paul} The guy's pretty good, what can I say? You know, I was kind of expecting what happened to happen. The name "Ukyou", read a certain way, indicates she'll be on the groom's side at the wedding. Though the last line... the last line was perfect. It's a nice vignette, I'll grant it that, but one that requires umpteen assumptions on the part of the reader. On its own merits, though... 8 out of 10. It's been done, but you're doing it well enough that it only matters a little. - - - - - Title: Redemption chp 1 Series: Ranma Genre: Second Chance Author: Long Ngo Email: shortyes@aol.com Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/tokyo/dojo/2881 Date Sent to FFML: 8/23/98 Size: 20.3 K Summary: Ranma gets a second chance {Paul} First, the opening bit... you know, it's a bit weird for Akane to use the exact same terminology to refer to Ryoga... sounds like she's working from the Cliffs Notes versions of the manga. And I was just like "what the HECK is going on?" when I read the first scene. Talk about starting in medias res... and the slamming on Ryoga is a bit gratuitous. Ranma essentially demolished everything Kasumi held dear in one episode of the manga, and all HE got was a poke on the head and a gentle admonishing. Kasumi may be overly protective of Akane... but unless there's some odd bestiality fetish going around, a human and a pig sleeping in the same bed isn't nearly that bad. Also, when you have the characters reflect on what's happened to them, their revelations seem to be a bit more blatantly expository than they have any right to be. I'll be interested to see where you're going with this "second chance", but the opening setup was a bit too "I want to say these things so I'll let the characters do it for me" for my tastes. 9 or 10 out of 20. - - - - - Title: Wheel of Fire #7: Doco in the Battle of the Bands Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Continuation Author: Razorclaw X Email: spiceoflife@hotmail.com Homepage: http://www.crosswinds.net/anaheim/~slythe/ranma/ranff.html Date Sent to FFML: 8/21/98 Size: 180kb Summary: Same story posted a while ago; no need to review. Nabiki forms a band with the intent to win an all-expenses-paid trip to Hawaii! Of course, if one is not careful, one's decisions will come back to haunt her.... [This story appeared and was reviewed in a previous list.] - - - - - Title: Heart of flame breath of fire Ch.3 Series:Ranma 1/2 Genre:Self insertion, dark Author:Catbert25 Email:Catbert25@juno.com Homepage: Date Sent to FFML:8/24 Size: Summary: A mysterious stranger shows up in Nerima and integrates himself into the Tendo's lives. He becomes a student of the dojo and forms a shakey friendship with Akane. However, he also brings his problems with him. His name is Ryu; a strangely powerful boy with no martial arts training. He becomes hunted by the Amazon tribe due to some magical artifact he holds called 'The Dragon heart.' It grants him amazing chi powers that he himself is barely able to control. The apperance of one of his old persuers doesn't help matters. Meanwhile, Akane runs into Pantyhoes Taro and tries to get. . . [SNIP] [The story could not be located on the FFML archive; it will be added to the next list.] - - - - - Title: Kasumi's Addiction Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Spamfic Author: Gregg Sharp Email: Metroanime@aol.com Homepage: http://members.aol.com/metroanime/main.html Date Sent to FFML: 8/16 Size: two pages Summary: what deep dark secret does Kasumi keep hidden in that drawer? {Paul} *Pfft* BAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, this was goooood. Especially since I actually expected something serious to come of it. Kasumi *pfft* a chocaholic *pfft*... Everyone's got a weakness, ne? 9 of 10 for humor. - - - - - Title: The Bet- Kimiko's Legacy Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Teaser, Alterniverse Author: Gregg Sharp, Chris Angel Email: Metroanime@aol.com Homepage: http://members.aol.com/metroanime/main.html Date Sent to FFML: 8/13 Size: small Summary: the stone is thrown, the ripples spread, and triplets are borne to Kimiko Tendo. {Paul} "Obviously, this could be thoroughly insane." Truer final words were never spoken. This series has a LOT of inherent potential. 10 of 10 for that, and for how interestingly everyone comes together at once. Oh... and if Shampoo is one of the Tendos, and said clan-hood works both ways... one wonders what happens when and if Ranma spars with the girls... evil grin<. - - - - - Title: Soulmates - part 5 Series: Ranma 1/2 Genre: Comedy Author: Scott Schimmel Email: schimmel@seas.upenn.edu Homepage: http://www.seas.upenn.edu/~schimmel/writing/writing.html Date Sent to FFML: August 22, 1998 Size: ~12K Summary: (series) Due to the influence of a magical crimson cord, Ranma and Akane switch bodies. (chapter) Ranma and Akane experience a perfectly ordinary school day. Really. {Paul} How many fics have done the whole body-swapping thing? And how many stories have been written about it? Conceptually, it doesn't cover all that much new ground. And the whole "Taming of the Shrew" "this is how you act and I'll bet you don't like being on the other end of it" idea is almost being forcibly developed because of both parties' desire to keep the switch secret. I'd definitely like to see what happens when "Ranma" gets into his usual shenanigans with his horde of admirers... for this part, I'd have to say 11 or 12 out of 20. Good writing, very few problems, funny in places...but nothing spectacular. * * * * * [Tenchi Muyo!] - - - - - Title: Heaven and Eternity; Gathering of the Children Series: Tenchi Muyo! Genre: Action Author: K'thardin Email: kthardin@geocities.com Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/area51/nebula/9766 Date Sent to FFML: April 7 Size: 30KB Summary: Unfolding events have attracted the attention of one of the many cosmic beings in the universe. Investigating, he witnesses a battle between a powerful being and an entire fleet of starships. Delving further into the mystery he discovers the being's mistress, the goddess Tokimi, and that she does mean the universe well. Which would be all well and good, but a new power has entered the playing field. Now he has another problem, and a rude surprise when he tracks down the boy who weilds the power so like his. [See the next story for a combined review.] - - - - - Title: Heaven and Eternity; Revelations Series: Tenchi Muyo! Genre: Action/Somewhat Waffy Author: K'thardin Email: kthardin@geocities.com Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/area51/nebula/9766 Date Sent to FFML: April 9 Size: 33kb Summary: So now the cosmic being has landed on earth, and he gives Tenchi a choice concerning his growing powers. Taking the option that would allow him to keep his family safe, Tenchi then introduces the encentric being to the household. Turns out he knew a few of them from more than 700 years ago. And one in particular futher still. Meanwhile Sasami picks up a new friend who is a lot more than he seems. {Shunsuke} This is clearly not a finished work. With its many spelling errors, formatting, changing of the time and tense of the story, there's a lot that needs fixing. The author has an idea of where he's going but lacks a little in getting there. Some of this is standard OAV scenes tucked in while in other places is new ideas; the little dragon-creature as a Ryo-Ohki pal works, but the son/families thing seems a bit too much and overdone. With some time and effort and the removal of the off-hand comments, this could be worth reading. - - - - - Title: A debt Fullfilled part #2 - Wedding Bells Series:Tenchi Muyo Genre: Author:Doug Whiddon Email: Doug_W@geocities.com Homepage: Date Sent to FFML: Size:13k Summary: Tenchi learns of weddings in the making, and Mihoshi's family comes to town. {Shunsuke} Compared to the first part, this is a bit disappointing. It feels a bit rushed and incomplete, and a few errors scattered throughout take away from the flow. The plot and continuation of events is good, this just needs another edit by the author. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * End of the Reviews List or the week of: August 15 - 21, 1998