I'm not sure if this is a repost or not (I'm getting WAY too
absent-minded in my youth), so if it is a repost, well, it's a repost.
Neon Genesis Evangelion: Geo-Rip
Finale
By A-kun
Well, it's finally come. The day where Geo-Rip ends. I'm doing this
now because I don't know when and if I'll ever continue the story
further since I'm swamped in other projects. I'd like to thank everyone
who gave me C&C. Thanks everyone.
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This song is the Omake version of the 1st opening theme for Ushio & Tora
found at the end of Ushio & Tora 5. If I find the name, I'll replace
this message with it.
(Note for those who don't know: Chibi means 'Child'. In this story,
it's a child-like version of the character. If you've ever watched Blue
Seed, Slayers, the Omake at the end of Ushio & Tora 5, or Dragon Half,
you've seen Chibi.)
(Opening shot: We see Tokyo 3 from a distance.)
The road to the future is just too far away
(Caption: Tokyo 3 suddenly collapses as Chibi Unit 01 appears. The
unit is....smiling.)
And is filled with many things that interrupt my dreams
(Caption: We see numerous Chibi angels appear, then various Chibi NERV
staff step in front of them, followed by Chibi supporting cast, followed
by Chibi main cast, then Chibi Asuka and Chibi Rei appear at the edges.
Chibi Shinji pops up in front of you, scaring you.)
I'm not going to the peaceful place
(Caption: We see Chibi Shinji chasing the Chibi Unit 01, which is,
oddly enough, the same height as him.)
I'm going to walk the road to tomorrow
(We see Chibi Unit 01 pouring tears out of it's eyes as Chibi Angel 4
stabs a tentacle into it's rear. Chibi Unit 01 promptly pounds the crap
out of Chibi Angels 4, 5, 8, and 16.)
By bundling a fighting mind and bravery in my hands
(Caption: Chibi Unit 00 and Chibi Unit 02 clutch each other. Chibi
Shinji jogs by in Chibi Unit 01 chasing a tiny version of the Angel Egg
which is rolling down hill. They go off screen as Chibi Unit 00 and
Chibi Unit 02 watch them pass by. Suddenly, Chibi Unit 01 runs uphill
being chased by a HUGE Land-Version of Angel 6.)
Am I going forward, looking straight ahead?
(Caption: Chibi Shinji sweatdrops as both Chibi Rei and Chibi Asuka
each hand him a heart-shaped box of chocolates. Chibi-Mack,
Chibi-Misato, Chibi-Ritsuko, and Kaji are looking on. Kaji is trying,
and failing, to understand why he's full sized while the others are
Chibi.)
Fight Mind for my dream
(Caption: We see Eva Unit 01 in it's full height. The camera spirals
upwards around Unit 01 until it reaches the face and backs off. Unit 01
turns into Chibi Unit 01 and starts doing moves from Ace Ventura: Pet
Detective. The other Chibi-Evas and the Chibi Angel they're fighting
sweatdrop.)
I want to hold the brightness tight
(Caption: Chibi Shinji is standing on Chibi Unit 01's shoulder (it's
now a lot bigger than him). Suddenly, they revert to normal and look
fiercely determined about something.)
With which nobody can compete
(Caption: A giant block of cement whacks both in the head. They revert
to Chibi as the camera pulls back to show, written in Kanji, "Neon
Genesis Evangelion: Geo-Rip" in large blue paint. Just beneath that is,
written in green paint, "By A-kun". Both Chibi Shinji and Chibi Unit 01
collapse, but the cement block remains were it is until the last few
seconds when it starts to fall on them before the screen fades to
black.)
------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------
June 15th, 2020
Southern Coast of Japan
Maya Ibuki relaxed as she let the sun bathe her in death rays. She
wasn't scared. Thanks to sun screen, the deadly rays given off by the
sun wouldn't do anything except give her the perfect tan. She clapped
her hands and a drink was handed to her.
"Good work, Mack." Maya said.
"T'was nuthin' Ma'am." Mack replied.
"Now, go bother Gendo in the kitchen." Maya replied.
"Yes, Ma'am." Mack said, scurrying off as Maya dismissed him.
"Oh, fan girls." Maya called.
Makoto Hyuga and Shigeru Aoba both walked over in the traditional garb
of female Hawaiian dancers. They looked at each other as though given a
choice of being cattle-prodded to death or being dropped into a pit full
of scorpions and snakes. They began fanning their former co-worker.
"I sure could go for a massage." Maya said loudly.
Ritsuko Akagi and Misato Katsuragi both ran over and began massaging
Maya's feet.
"This is the life." Maya said, smiling brightly.
"GENDO! Mistress Maya demands a party cake!" Mack yelled.
"Yes sir..." Gendo replied weakly.
Gendo Ikari grumbled and went back to work. He paused briefly and
kicked Ryoji Kaji awake.
"What?! What?!" Kaji asked, waking up.
"Mistress Maya wants a party cake, stupid." Gendo said.
"Not another one! She's had parties every night for the past nine
weeks!" Kaji whined.
"Oh, knock it off, you two schmucks!" Kier Lorenz snapped as he
finished the life-sized Ice sculptures of the Sailor Senshi that Maya
had demanded.
Down the beach, Rei Ayanami was talking into a cellular phone.
"Yes, Key, I do like you. Now, remember what we talked about.
Confidence and self-assurance. Be positive and open. You don't have to
worry about what others would say." Rei said, "And don't be afraid to
show your emotions."
"Thank you for replying to Key's call, Rei. Key is happy." Key
replied.
"Good bye dear." Rei said, before turning off her cel phone.
"Who was that, Rei-chan?" Asuka Soryhu Langely asked.
"Key. She was feeling down again." Rei replied before settling back
down.
"Wow, look at Shinji-kun." Asuka said.
Rei looked up at Shinji, who was fearlessly riding a long wave.
"He is something, ne, Asuka-chan?" Rei asked.
"Hai." Asuka replied.
"Say, I sure could go for some more snacks. Oy, Kensuke. Tell Gendo
to make us some more snacks." Asuka called.
"Right." Kensuke Aida, master computer programmer, replied.
Kensuke turned to call for Fuyutsuki the butler, when he caught sight
of Touji and Hikari necking again. He sighed.
"Hey, Fuyutsuki-" Kensuke began.
"Yes Sir?" Fuyutsuki asked, suddenly next to Kensuke.
"GYAH!" Kensuke cried.
Kensuke waited until his heart slowed from Mach 9 to Normal before
speaking up again.
"Don't DO that! Anyway, Asuka and Rei want more snacks." Kensuke said.
"Right away, sir. By the way, sir, shall I give them the letter with
their results?" Fuyutsuki asked, producing a white envelope.
"Mmmmmm, I'll do that." Kensuke said, taking the letter.
"Very good, sir." Fuyutsuki said, vanishing in the same errie manner
that he appeared in.
"That's creepy." Kensuke commented.
Kensuke looked at the envelope. It had been, what, two years since the
last Angel attack? And that had been pathetic. Evangelion Unit 2
killed it in two minutes flat. Without assistance or anything more than
a Progressive Knife.
After that, it turned out that NERV and SEELE were out of money and
they couldn't get funds from any more countries. That's when Maya Ibuki
and Kensuke Aida bought both organizations out. Maya Ibuki, daughter of
THE richest woman on Earth and Kensuke Aida, master hacker.
Then, for some unknown reason, Rei and Asuka had dropped their
differences and became friends. Then, Shinji became serious with both
of them. It was still surprising, but at least the love triangle was
resolved into....well, a threesome. Kensuke shook his head and plugged
the nosebleed that had started while he reminisced.
And now, Kensuke was holding in his hands the results of their
send-away pregnacy tests. He stood up and walked over to the two women.
They both looked at him curiously as Shinji walked out of the water,
drenched, but smiling.
"Oy, Shinji, the results are here." Kensuke said, waving the envelope.
"Really?" Shinji asked.
Asuka snatched the envelope and tore it open. She and Rei read the
letter before beginning to laugh happily and hug each other.
"Shinji, you're a daddy!" Asuka and Rei said in unison.
Shinji was about to reply when something happened.
He woke up.
He looked around frantically. Asuka and Rei were snuggled on each side
of him. He sighed in relief and relaxed. Yes sir, Shinji Ikari was a
happy man. He recalled that the event had occurred a few days ago, so
his mind must have just been sorting down the events of his life. He
grinned. He wondered what his kids would look like, but decided that
he'd love them no matter what.
Unless they turned out to be pervert-weirdos like Kaji or Gendo.
But he'd still love them.
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Omake Song from Ushio & Tora 5 - Boogie Woogie Monster
(Opening Shot: Chibi Rei and Chibi Asuka talking about Shinji.)
He is more pure-minded than Tarzan
(Caption: Chibi Shinji Ikari when he's smiling.)
And a little less unreliable than Superman
(Caption: Chibi Unit 01 leaping up into the air and promptly crashing
to the ground since it can't fly.)
You live in adventures and your eyes are so attractive
(Caption: Chibi Shinji with his eyes sparkling.)
I don't worry about you
(Caption: Chibi Unit 00 and Chibi Unti 02 stepping back as Chibi Unit
01 starts beating up on the Chibi Angel.)
Because, look, you'll be back with a smiling face
(Caption: Chibi Shinji with his eyes sparkling again.)
I fell in love, Boogie Woogie Monster
(Caption: Chibi Rei falling against Chibi Shinji in a movie theater.)
I fell in love, Boogie Woogie Monster
(Caption: Chibi Asuka falling against Chibi Shinji in the same movie
theater.)
When I think about you, it's like I'm in a dream
(Caption: Chibi Rei and Chibi Asuka with their eyes sparkling as they
watch Chibi Shinji playing a video game against Chibi Mack, Chibi
Kensuke and Chibi Touji. Chibi Shinji's character is having the crud
beat out of it, but the girls are happy anyway.)
I can't stop myself from being noisy, from frolicking
(Caption: Chibi Rei and Chibi Asuka suddenly pull out pom-poms and
start doing a cheer for Chibi Shinji.)
Chao, Chao, why don't you love him?
(Caption: Chibi Mack, Chibi Touji and Chibi Kensuke are so distracted
that Chibi Shinji wins.)
I fell in love, Boogie Woogie Monster
(Caption: Chibi Rei and Chibi Asuka falling against Chibi Shinji in a
movie theater.)
I dreamed, Boogie Woogie Monster
(Caption: They begin, unknowingly, hugging with Chibi Shinji in the
middle. He doesn't seem mad, but from the colors that his face is
turning, he's not having fun either.)
I fell in love, Boogie Woogie Monster
(Caption: Chibi Rei and Chibi Asuka each kiss Chibi Shinji who blushes.
The rest of the Chibi cast start throwing popcorn at the three for
interrupting the movie.)
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Well, that's the end.
Huh.
That was easy.
Then why the heck did I take so #@$^$@^@^!^!%^!^$% long to finish it?
I guess I'll never know. Do you guys know?
A-kun, signing off.
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