Studio YOGIPIGS presents:
SAILOR MOON AX"
Based on Bishojo Senshi Sailor Moon by Takuechi Naoko
Written by Studio YOGIPIGS' "Project Muffinhead"
LEAD WRITER: ROBERT BARBA
CO-WRITER: ELIZABETH THOMAS
SAILOR MOON AX LEGENDS WRITER: AMY ANGEL
SAILOR MOON AX LEGENDS WRITER: EMANUELE BONAMICO
Research by Studio YOGIPIGS' "Odango Labs"
LEAD SAILOR MOON ANALYST (US VERSION): MARVIN PEACE
LEAD SAILOR MOON ANALYST (JAPANESE VERSION): SAKURA EDWARDS
TECHNOLOGICAL ANALYST: JOHN SHEAREN
WEAPONS AND MILITARY ANALYST: DAVID CLARE
PROJECT EDITOR: SAMUEL LAMBSON
CHAPTER FIVE: Deck the Malls, Part One
Bauxite was blasted back into the depths of the store, even as Moon followed him in, readying to cut loose with another ki blast. She had a determined look on her face, and for a change, she knew she had to take extra care not to seriously injure this guy--she'd have to interrogate him later. Her Moonbeam ripped from her hands, lancing towards Bauxite with a deadly accuracy, and missed him only due to fortuitous movement on his part; the beam rocketed past him and instead, tore apart a display rack, sending shards of what had once been diamond jewelry to scatter like so much crystalline dust. Nonetheless, she got close enough to grab him and throw a hard, ki-charged left hook, knocking him head over heels and through the Rolex case.
The few patrons in the immediate vicinity of the battle initially breathed a sigh of relief that the legendary Sailor Moon had come to their rescue; this however changed as they realized that the conflict was moving their way, and so the throng subsequently scattered like flies.
Moon momentarily paid attention to their dispersal, hoping that they would be able to escape in time, before Bauxite could get any ideas about taking hostages. That was the least thing she needed or wanted. She was here to defend the innocent and stop the criminal, and in the name of the Moon, she would ensure he faced justice. ((Now, if I can only stop running stupid-ass one-liners in my head....))
Noticing the crowd dispersal and Moon's inattention, Bauxite took advantage of the momentary distraction. The criminal bounded back to his feet and as he punched his fist into his open palm, he shouted, "Sazanami!" A wave of white energy rivaling Moon's own erupted from his fist, lashing out in an arc and tagged Moon, flinging her like a paper doll, and slamming her into a perfume rack. On impact, the scented bottles shattered like delicate grenades, shards of glass and porcelain slashing her as they sprayed outward in a beautiful yet damaging blossom.
"I see you're still easy to take down, Sera Muun!" Bauxite jeered. "Where's your beau Tuxedo Kamen to save you?"
"'Tuxedo Common?' What the hell are you talking about, you psycho?" Moon roared as she climbed out of the fragrant debris and stared at bauxite with indignant fury. She ignored the throbbing in her head and the dizziness that signaled that she'd just been nailed harder than she'd been in quite a while. To add insult to injury, her uniform was stained and smelled like a schizophrenic jumble of White Diamonds, CK1, Obsession, and a few other brands she couldn't readily identify. ((Bastard ruined my newest crackerjacks! Sunovabich's gonna pay!)) was her predominant train of thought as she tried to rein in her anger--and not entirely succeeding.
She did admit one thing to herself: this Bauxite character was a good combatant, and would use every advantage he could get against her. He was quick on his feet (apparently her trick did manage to catch him off guard), and quick in the mental department, too. As for power, well...it was pretty obvious he had that, as well: it took a lot of power to take her off her feet. No doubt about it; the Krays were playing for keeps. Well, she wasn't going to let them. Not one damn bit.
So, she'd have to keep her head while playing with this guy; he was an unknown factor, and with any unknown factor came inherent dangers that she'd have to do cartwheels to avoid. Plus, she'd have to come up with a plan. She had a brain, damn it, and she'd damn well better use it. So as she charged in, her tactical little mind began to sort out something that Sun-Tzu or Karl von Clausewitz might have come up with.
((But until I double-check it, I'd better wing it.)) She charged him, taking the initiative. Predictably, he smirked and made some incoherent comment about "Sen she" or something like that. He then prepared to launch that shockwave attack of his again. ((Well, I'm not gonna get caught again by that one. Diana Davenport didn't raise her oldest daughter to be a complete idiot. Then again, if she knew two of her daughters were superheroes, she'd have to question that earlier point of thought,)) Moon thought with a wry touch.
"Muun no baka! I thought you learned, but I'll have to teach you again," Bauxite sneered. "Now die! Sazanami!"
((I don't think so!)) Moon mentally screamed back as she executed step one of her plan. As the blast of energy thundered towards her, she somersaulted over the strike, flipping over his head, and upon descent, spun around and attacked. Before he could react, Moon jabbed her opponent in the back of his head with a palm strike, then grabbed his shoulder and vaulted back to the forefront. Taking advantage of his confusion, she bellowed, "Lunar Eclipse!" and executed a shoken-type flying uppercut, igniting Bauxite with sheets of ki-flame and slamming him into a cashier stand. Not even waiting for another chance to let him get up, she loosed another Moonbeam that blasted into the cashier's desk...
...as he flipped backwards and raced up the escalator to the next floor. "Catch me if you can, Muun!" he cried, as his voice echoed down, taunting her. Taking the bait, Moon raced up after him, practically soaring up those stairs and at the top, leaping forward as though she had Uranus' abilities of flight, as though she intended to take the battle from the confines of the two-dimensional ground. At the time, she'd thought a quick movement would have avoided an ambush.
Instead, she played right into it. Bauxite was just below her, and as he slammed his palms on the floor, he canted, "Tremor Shotgun!" and slabs of the floor terrazo blasted upwards, catching Moon in the middle of the improvised grapeshot. A big enough piece slammed into her and brought her to the floor, where a waiting Bauxite pounded her jaw with a well-placed kick that sent her flying into the intimates rack. Not even venturing a snappy comment, he strode forward and as she stood up, belted her with a nasty backhand that jarred her.
Moon, however, managed to recover from that second backhand to avoid the next punch coming her way--a ki-charged one, at that. She ducked under it, then caught it, spun and threw him. While in mid-air, she did a soccer style flip kick that tagged him in the lower abdomen, sending him sprawling into a set of nightwear that Serena swore she was never going to wear, no matter how much Darien begged.
As she charged him once again, she realized that Bauxite was the first opponent in a while that was capable to standing up against the Sailors, which was not necessarily a good thing. Worse, this battle was taking longer than expected, and was about to become downright ugly. If she didn't execute the rest of her plan soon, the opportunity to catch this guy might be too late.
Worse, Saturn and the other Sailors was still down there in the fighting, and while Moon trusted them to defend each other, that trust by no means extended itself to those criminals down there. If any of the other Sailors got injured in the battle, Moon swore that she would bring the whole damn mall down on the Krays' pointy little heads.
***
"Venus, baby," Pyromancer crooned as he fired a few fireballs at her, "I'm gonna take that braid of yours and use it like a stirrup. I'm gonna ride you like a pony, sweetheart."
"I said, go fuck yourself, Kray!" Venus snapped back as she ducked under the barrage of flaming missiles he'd loosed, then bounded forward, tucked into a roll, and leapt back to her feet. Still on the move, she loosed a few Cupid's Arrows in retaliation, the orange beams reaching through the air and detonated behind Pyromancer, making him momentarily duck and giving Venus a few seconds' worth of breathing space.
((I gotta get above this freak,)) she thought, ((and take it to the air.))
A wall of flame erupted behind Venus, and she bolted to the right as a huge public service display crashed to the floor, creating an umbra of sparks and debris flying in all directions. The blast of fire continued, detonating a store window in the distance, and setting the store behind that ablaze. The fires quickly spread, and soon the specialty tie store would be nothing more than an expensive memory.
"C'mon out, Venus." The Sailor could hear her opponent's voice, sick and twisted, just above the din of the blazing store. "I'll put a smile on your face that you won't soon forget, sweetcakes."
"The only smile you're getting outta me is when I put you back behind bars!" she called out, reaching behind her for her pouch and producing a pair of handcuffs.
"Like to play with toys, huh?" he responded. "We can play, Venus. Oh, can we play." She peeked from where she was and noted that he was aiming in her direction, launching another major blast of flame. Again, she raced to avoid the blast, but not entirely in time; the flap of her jumper top caught on fire, almost singeing her hair. Not really having much choice, she hit the floor, rolled, and as the flames were extinguished, tore the top off her, revealing an orange T-shirt with a white Venus sigil over her left breast.
"That's the way I like it," Pyromancer crooned. "Strip for me, baby."
Venus' eyes dripped pure malice, rising back to her feet, drawing herself up to her full height. "Are you stupid or something, Kray? You want to take a mall hostage, but you're burning it to the ground. You want me, but you're trying to kill me." She snorted in disgust. "I guess that's why you're a criminal. You're clearly too stupid to make an honest buck."
Venus' words seemed to have an effect on Pyromancer. "Bitch!" he snarled, "I am Pyromancer. Nobody fucks with me, y'hear? If I want to do something, I do something!" With that, he pulled some incendiary grenades out from behind him and tossed them into the bookstore next to him. It took less than a minute before the store was in complete ruins. *"Nothing can stop me, NOTHING AND NOBODY!"* he screamed as the flames raged out of the store and set the next one ablaze.
((He's almost off balance,)) Venus silently mused as she calmly stood there, as though waiting for a petulant child to stop its tantrum. ((Just a little more, stupid....))
Meanwhile, unaware of her thoughts, the arsonist was on a verbal roll. *"I REIGN SUPREME! YEARS FROM NOW, EVERYONE WILL TREMBLE AT THE NAME OF BURTON KRAY!"* At his side, the flames danced in the stores, fiery worshippers prostrating themselves before their living God. *"You should be thankful that I even consider you WORTHY of having me touch you, VENUS!"* With that, he strode towards her, cocksure (in more ways than one) and arrogant as hell. *"If I were you, I would be BEGGING to be by my side!"*
Still, she stood there, unconcerned. "You're not impressing me."
Finally reaching his destination, he pointed one of his wrist flamers at her. "You'd better start being nice to me, Venus, 'cause I'm holding more than just your cute little ass in my hands. I'm also holding your life."
A lazy, come-hither-type smile crossed her face. "Oh, I doubt that, Mr. Hormone Infestation."
Pyromancer nearly pressed the still-hot barrel against her face. "And what makes you say that, Sailor Boy-toy?"
"Because you never stop thinking with your lower head, do you?" This voice came from behind him. Pyromancer turned to see Venus standing several feet away from him, the energy of a Cupid's Arrow blazing in her hands. "You'll never learn, and that's why you'll never be more than a two-bit crook."
He spun to fire at her, the anger at her deception clearly etched on his face. Ignoring the image he was just pointing his flamer at, he snarled, "You're just making this harder on yourself, Venus! But you're not getting away this time. I've got you right where I want you." Allowing himself a bit of mirth in his voice, he replied with a jaunty tone, "Y'see, Venus, I'm not as stupid as you think."
"No. You're even more stupid." That voice spoke from behind him, and as he turned, he heard Venus' voice thunder, *"Eat this! Radiant Emotion!"*
The next few seconds blazed by Pyromancer before he could even imagine them. Moving at a speed fast enough that he couldn't keep up with her, Venus immediately went into a barrage of punches and kicks that began to knock her opponent silly. She also intentionally took the time to disarm his weapons. In the span of less than a minute, she landed 50-plus hits on him, dazing him, but allowing him still to retain consciousness. Additionally, as he finally brought his arms up to counter her blows, she then launched into step two of her attack: a straight vertical shoken uppercut, launching him towards the raised glass ceiling. As he reached the zenith of his air time, she leapt above him and initiated the third part of the attack: a complete release of heart-shaped ki blasts in every direction, many of which slammed into him, each blossoming into a fiery explosion on impact.
Pyromancer had no chance to recover from the Sailor of Emotion's onslaught. As Venus' assault ended, he landed painfully on the floor, wheezing in pain as though he were trying out for the Darth Vader sound-alike contest. As he managed to climb to his feet, he stood there, swaying for a few seconds before he half-snarled, "I'm going to destroy you, Venus, and rape your dead bo--"
He never completed his thoughts as the sweet silence of unconsciousness caught up with him.
Venus, upon landing from her attack, bounded over to him to ensure that he was incapacitated. Checking him momentarily to see that he was, she reached from behind her and pulled a pair of handcuffs out of nowhere. ((Thank God for subspace fields on our prism rings,)) Venus mentally chattered, ((or I might have to get a little more physical.)) Snapping one handcuff on him while his arms were conveniently located behind his back, she cooed, "Was it as good for you as it was for me?"
***
Saturn began her counter attack easily, focusing on the nearest group of idiots near her. She was young. She was tough. She was the bomb, and she was going to take them down.
"Hey kid, go home and cry to your mama," sneered one of those closest to her.
"I think you'll be crying when I'm done with you butt-munches!" she snarled. Moving in closer, she had a second or two to time the attacks.
*((NOW!))*
"Chronometer Burst!" Using her mastery over time, she went into a burst attack, moving fast enough through time that it seemed that she was everywhere at once. One second, she was backhanding a guy in the face; the next, she was laying a roundhouse kick to his partner's. Each of them punched futility, trying to catch someone who seemed to be blinking from location to location, unassailable and impossible to hit. She kept this up for a few more seconds until disaster struck: with a random punch thrown by one of her opponents, she blinked right into his fists.
Dazed by the blow, said opponent took immediate advantage of the situation: he tackled her, then began to rain merciless blow upon merciless blow on her body and face. Saturn winced from each blow taken, trying to shove the increasing pain back into the farthest reaches of her mind before she could black out. Finally, she couldn't take any more, and went limp.
Her punisher looked at his partners and said, "Yo, man, pass me your gun. I's gonna cap this little bitch." Taking the gun into his hands, he shoved it right next to her temple, and said, "You just ain't good 'nuff, byatch." He pulled the trigger.
Nothing happened.
A voice in the corner said, "Is this what you're looking for?" He turned to see Sailor Saturn, standing there smugly, holding what appeared to be an ammo magazine in her hand.
Her assailant looked down and noted he was holding an empty gun...
...right next to the temple of one of his partners.
No time to waste--in real time, anyway--she tossed the clip behind her, pulled her hands back, then thrust them forward, screaming, "Chronoclasm!" A purple beam of energy ripped from her hands and splashed against him, slamming him into a bench nearby. He smacked the back of his head against the edge of the seating area, leaving blood as he blacked out. However, by that time, Saturn had already begun her next attack. Running up to his partner, a hulking, burly man, she initiated her Chronometer attack, throwing a steady attack of rushing punches to his stomach, then a spinning snap kick to his head followed by a back-hand fist and a palm-to-chin uppercut to send him flying.
The third guy had, at this time, retreated into the distance. However, just because he was running away didn't necessarily mean he was going to escape. One pull-back of Saturn's fist, as it glowed with violet energies...
"Stopwatch Effect!"
...and the third person froze in place, the recipient of one of Saturn's time-stopping blasts.
Saturn dusted her hands, commenting, "Just one of these days I'd like to get some de--"
Without any warning, Saturn leapt into the air and rolled into a tight flip, as a barrage of small missiles rocketed through the space she had been a second ago. As she landed, she could hear the detonations in the distance. Snapping around to face her opponent, she immediately noticed a huge mountain of a man carrying a pair of Russian Strella III-class rocket launchers. He already looked like he'd taken a few punches, and was ready to take his anger out on someone--anyone.
"I am Massive, little one, and you shall not escape me."
"You mean, you're not gonna escape *me*," she replied, dropping into a combat position.
Massive's response to that was to laugh, then release another salvo of missiles towards the young girl. Saturn simply stood there, as though she were accepting the missiles coming towards her...
"Stopwatch Effect!"
...or waiting for the missiles to stop. As they floated eerily in place, stopped by the force of time itself, she walked up to them, then spun them around to face her opponent, then with a giggle, released them into normal time. As the missiles sped towards their intended target, the safeties in them sensed the homing signal and discharged safely, saving Massive from a gruesome death...
...only to feel pain as Saturn leapt through the blossoming explosions, smacking him across the face with a flying kick that under most circumstances would have been painful. However, Massive shrugged it off as though it were nothing. Rubbing his chin more out of habit than any actual pain, he gave the Sailor an annoyed look as though she were a minor insect to be dealt with and punched forward with his huge fist, slamming it into the floor, setting off a localized tremor.
The blast rippled towards Saturn, who avoided it by leaping forward and executing a mid-air flip over Massive's head, then as she landed, immediately executed a footsweep. Massive leapt, but that only gave Saturn the time needed to prance back, reaching behind her for something while muttering, "Moon's gonna give me another one of those 'I-told-you-so' speeches...ahh, here it is."
Bringing her hand back to the fore, she brought out a short wand the thickness of a broomstick. Clicking a recessed button in the center, both sides telescoped out until the small stick became a metal bo staff.
Massive laughed, his guffaws seeming more ridiculous than humorous. "Well, the little child has brought a swtich so I may punish her. Little girl, you don't know how futile that staff is."
Saturn sneered, saying, "As my friend Uranus is so fond of saying, 'Ah'm gonna open me up a can o' Grade A Premium whoop-ass on your stupid-ass hide!'"
Massive, feeling mortally insulted by the slip of a girl, raced towards her in a furious rage.
Some people never learn.
As he threw a full-strength descending punch, Saturn did the splits and bent down as low as possible, with the maximum reach of the fist no more than a few inches above her ducked head. With no time to waste, she swung the staff, successfully tripping Massive, and as he hit the floor, she leapt back to her feet, Massive diving in a wasted attempt to catch her, and leaving himself open. As she leapt back, she called up her power, and waited for the opening, which occurred on his dive.
"Okay, ya idiot!" she screamed, "watch this trick! Chronometer Burst Catapult!" Punting him with a kick, she leapt after him in the air, laying punch after kick after airborne roundhouse after attack after attack, throwing an intense amount of hits in a span of seconds, and ending it with a vicious blast of her Chronoclasm projectile.
Saturn landed on the ground safely. Massive landed on the ground in a painful-sounding crunch. As she reached behind her for the handcuffs, as she always did, Saturn wished Moon was here to see this--there was no chance that the Sailor of Time would follow her parents' path. More importantly, within her costume, Heather simply wished that her parents were here and still alive, so she could show them the same.
As she stood back up to breathe, she noticed another gang of idiots marching her way. Bending down briefly to pick up her bo staff, she snarled, "C'mon boys! Who's next?"
***
The group of men surrounded Sailor Jupiter, all ready to fire, and some with close-in weapons, should the Sailor of Lightning try to escape. However, the young woman just stood in the center of their circle, just waiting for them to make a move.
One of the guys looked at her and said, "Ohh, this is gonna be *GREAT!* I gets ta say that I killed Sailor Jupiter!"
"And boy are those little juvenile delinquents of yours gonna be proud that Daddy's a murderer," Jupiter said, her tones completely unconcerned and nonchalant.
"You're gonna die, bitch!" another screamed.
Jupiter yawned. "Oh please. It's always 'you'ze gonna die, biatch' or 'I'm gonna cap ya, ho'!' Don't you guys ever come up with original dialog? Have any of you read any Shakespeare lately? 'Boorish blackguard' has a nice ring to it. Then there's Cervantes, Garcia--especially Jerry, though Alfredo would do well in a pinch, too; Steinbeck's fairly good for that, and so's Joyce...."
One of the would-be executioners, brandishing a bladed tonfa, moved forward to cut her down. "Ju'us shut up, you cunt!"
Jupiter deftly sidestepped and administered a vicious elbow the base of his neck. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't interrupt while I'm talking. It's rude." As he staggered back, she spun, turned him around, and executed a vicious right hook that dropped him in one. "Plus, you seriously need to work on that grammar. How were your grades in school?"
The lead hoodlum, deciding enough was enough, roared, *"Fuckin' waste the bitch!"* He pulled his trigger.
At the same time, came a roar of command. *"I don't think so!"* Jupiter bellowed, her voice the very tone of law and order, as her fist went into the air. *"Ion Vortex!"*
Tendrils of emerald lightning blasted from her upraised fist, then began to spin around in an electrified vortex, as though someone had hooked a dust devil up to a generator. The men quickly surrounding her were swept up in this shocking tornado, their bodies twitching, their guns discharging, and Jupiter being protected only by a slight electrical aura that stray rounds were bouncing off of. Unfortunately, they didn't help in their entirety; there was a streamer of blood racing down Jupiter's right leg and her blanching face showed the visage of a woman who was fighting off serious amounts of pain. Still, she managed to stay on her feet, and as the attack grew stronger, it propelled her assailants into the ceiling, where they slammed with a painful-sounding thump. At once she stopped the attack, allowing her downed opponents to have gravity return them not-so-gently to the ground. As they fell the ten feet towards the marble floor, to complete the second phase of their discomfort, finally crashing in various broken, burnt, and shocked positions on the floor.
As puddles of red pooled underneath them, and a white haze of ozone filled the air like a grim specter assessing its trade, Jupiter dropped to her knees, gnashing her teeth. "Pinche bastards," she swore in Spanglish, "are gonna be the death of me someday."
She heard the click of a round sliding into its chamber. That sound came from behind her head. That sound was also accompanied by ragged breathing, as the person carrying the gun struggled to breathe, as though his next breath might be his last. "Damna...ble bitch. Shoulda...killed you when...we had the chance. Now die."
"Hinotama!"
The voice that called out the attack was strong, male and obviously not Japanese, though the pronunciation was spot on; only the slight hint of a voice usually used to English gave it away. As Jupiter looked out of the corner of her eyes, she saw the man who was about to execute her crumple to the ground in a sheet of violet flame.
Jupiter turned around, but yelped in pain as her turn failed and she hit the ground in a bloody clump. "Damn...this hurts."
Her rescuer's voice was light-hearted, but was tinged with worry. "Mercury can take a look at that once everything's complete. Can you walk out, or do you need me to carry you?"
She faced the person, gritting, "I can walk out of here, Saint Dragon. Don't worry about me."
Saint Dragon looked back at her with his blue-gray eyes, even as he brushed his white hair out of his eyes. "Dammit, Lita, now's not the time for your 'I-am-ballsier-than-thou' act. If you need help, admit it. Please."
She stared up at him, giving him a once over. He was male, in his mid-to-late twenties, with his long white hair cascading down his back. He wore a white ninjitsu gi, with blue gauntlets, undershirt and blue boots, both items rimmed with gold and having black accents. Strapped to his back, he had a pair of blue katanas, sheathed but nonetheless deadly. His belt was a web utility, carrying several odds and ends, all of which spoke of the trade of ninjitsu. On his left breast, he had a small, stylized emblem of a blue dragon, framed by a golden halo. He was Saint Dragon, the famed White Shinobi of Justice, one of the SoCal HLO heroes, and an ally of the Sailors.
However, Jupiter knew him also as...
"Bobby," she spoke in calm measured tones. "Not now. Please. Let's discuss this later."
"As you wish," he said, his mouth in a tight line. He began to walk away.
"Bobby," Jupiter called. "Aren't you going to help me up?"
"No, Sailor Jupiter," he commented. "You want to walk out of here on your own, despite the fact that you could seriously injure yourself. You want to walk out on your own, despite the fact that neither Amy nor Johnny can heal all your wounds. You want to walk out on your own, despite the fact that it hurts me more than you to see you doing that." He turned back to her, and his eyes radiated frustration and pain.
As much as it hurt her to see him look at her like that, she returned his loving gaze with a steely one of her own. "I said we'll talk about this *later*."
"Yes, we will, won't we?" Without even bothering to ask her again, he reached down and picked her up in her arms. "Not a word, Lita. Not a single damn word."
She gave him the evil eye for a second more before her face split in a wide grin. "I have to get the last word in. I'm your girlfriend, remember?" She fought the urge to snuggle up against his chest, and let him carry her out; after all, it was Angelita Mendoza and Roberto K. Martinez that were lovers, not Sailor Jupiter and Saint Dragon. Their usual argument would have to be shelved once again, though it was inevitable that it would come, soon enough.
