From: "Robyn, Duke of Amber" <yu104479@yorku.ca>
Date: 9/12/1998, 7:43 PM
To: ffml@fanfic.com
CC: yu104479@yorku.ca



  After long last I finally finished this. It survived (in fragments)
  after a HD crash and left me blocked till I could beg borrow and
  steal the missing bits back into place.
  Now I can get back to my Eva-self-insert :)
  Let me know what you think.
                                cm784@torfree.net
                                 Neil Sinclair
                           aka Robyn, Duke of Amber

                         ****
               

  Well here it is finally....and about time to.
  
  All characters are owned by their respective creators and 
  copyright holders. 
 
  -This takes place in the disjointed chronology of my other S-Moon stuff.


              Long Weekend
              ^^^^^^^^^^^^

   Outside in the warm yellow sunlight and traffic murmur
  a robin sang.   

   She let the spoon settle with a clink on the china cereal bowl.
   From the stereo in the living room  came strains of Holly Cole. 
 
   She felt heavy.

   Maybe she should cut down on chocolate.
  -stop eating it altogether.
    
   She sat for a while and actually considered this.

   No, That would only give Usagi a chance to eat whatever
  would have usually been considered "Ami's share". Although she 
  really didn't mind letting the other girl have it she also 
  knew -or guessed, that Rei would have a few disagreeable words 
  about it.
   She tried to sooth as many fights as she could even if it 
  meant seeing what would cause one and then avoiding the 
  steps that might lead up to it.                    
          
   She looked at the medical textbook that lay propped in 
  front of her at the breakfast table again as she swallowed a 
  mouthful of cornflakes. 
  Ami's mother had finally insisted she ate a "normal" breakfast -either 
  traditional or Western at least twice a week. For some 
  reason she considered a diet of sandwiches only (no matter how
  nutritional) "unnatural"
   
   Ami sighed, not the first sigh today and probably (she 
  thought) not the last. 
  She was too tired and that was probably the cause of some of 
  her problems.

   - Her mother was a doctor and the facts in the textbook did
  back her up.

   Maybe her mother was right.

   - maybe this sort of size increase was "perfectly natural".
  All the literature seemed to point in this direction as 
  well.

   A "normal" biological reaction.
 
   It was awkward.
  
   It made her nervous.

   It made her walk to school holding her books close in her 
  arms.
   It made her face redden when she heard others talking in the 
  bathroom.
   The whole situation had been fine in the beginning -just 
  another few things to observe in life with a certain abstract 
  detachment  but recently -well, things seemed to be 
  beginning to get out of control. 
  The signs which proclaimed her womanhood were...getting 
  bigger.
  
   It made it difficult to run the way she used to.
   -or at least felt that way.
   
   It was wrong.
    
   No. 
  
   "Perfectly Natural." "
  
   In neat and precise handwriting (in English, a language she 
  was trying to become better in) she wrote two words in the 
  notebook beside her other text
  
   PUBERTY SUCKS.

   She blushed faintly and scribbled it out.
   
   She wished she could look at herself with the sort of 
  clarity she tried to see others with.
  Mother said she looked at things too hard, that she should 
  relax and enjoy her youth.   
 
   She said she understood how hard things seemed but: 
   "You  needed to relax just as much as you needed to study 
  -everything in moderation."
  Usually when she said things like this she 
  was just coming back from the hospital after working a 
  double shift or sometimes longer.
   
   She sometimes just had enough time (and energy) to just pop her head 
  into Ami's room before dragging herself off to sleep.
  Ami often worried that all those hours, all that work, was 
  gradually chipping the life away from her mother like some sort of 
  deranged sculptor. - A youma madman who would not stop until 
  nothing was left but dust -the energy and vitality gone.
   
   - Yet, she also saw how happy her mother was at helping people 
  and knew that no matter how unappealing it seemed at times 
  she wanted to follow in her footsteps.
  She felt the muscles of her face gently pull themselves 
  into a frown.

   But would she? 

   She considered the time she had glimpsed of the future.
  -had actually BEEN there.
  With the power of the crystal would she (or anyone else)
  ever have to worry about getting sick again?
   
   Despite how wonderful it sounded in abstract in reality
  it sounded unnatural.
  Also, what about a place where people aged slowly (if at 
  all)?

   What happened to free thought?
  Did people simply accept their lot in life and not bother 
  looking ( or thinking) any deeper?

   Was this a glorious future or simply insects caught in
  amber?
 
   A small insidious voice whispered that these thoughts were
  disloyal to all she that she served.
  It said that such thoughts were treason and would end in 
  pain and betrayal.
 
   Ami dismissed this after a cursory examination. She knew that 
  she could play "Devils Advocate" with herself far to well sometimes.
  Sometimes, she knew, that this contrary internal personality was
  simply a part of her thinking process and could often come up with
  convincing reasons, explanations and excuses but often neglected the
  emotional in their (in her) search for reasonable (or rational)
  explanations.
   
   She shook her head slightly.
   
   If she gave into the reasonable all the time she would never 
  have been able to even believe in something as fantastical as 
  the Moon Kingdom. And she knew didn't she that it was -it 
  had been real. 
 
   She glanced at the small ring on her right pinky.
  It was a thin band of gold set with a small, grey stone.
  A small grey stone she had polished herself using the rock 
  tumbler she had gotten from her father when she was nine.
 
   A small, grey, insignificant rock.
  
   A piece of the moon which she had picked up with her own 
  bare hand.                              
  
   It was an impossiblity of course.
  The very idea of her clad only in a sailor fuku
  (and one which was scandalously short at that!) on the moon.    
  She had learned that there were more things in the world than
  the "Laws of Mighty Science".  
   
   A small smile tugged the corners of her lips.
  Just the sort of impossibility to shake her out of her 
  rational world. She loved it.

   It was funny how that sort of thought would have sent her 
  reeling even a year ago.
  At one time she had let the uncertainties of life become 
  blurred and ruled by science.

   It had been easier that way then.
  She remembered back when she was little - really little.
  It was when her parents had stopped even trying to live in the
  same house.
  She remembered little girl who told her parents stories of fairies in
  bottles used to light the streets of magic kingdoms who 
  hidden behind the laws of thermodynamics and Mendalian 
  genetics.
  She had thought she had lost that girl for a while but now 
  had found her again and made her smile.
  This time maybe it was better to look at EVERYTHING with some moderation.

   Inside her head her mother's voice whispered a cheerful "I told you so."
   
   She sipped her tea (western style tea with plenty of milk 
  and sugar) and looked at the doodle her pencil was tracing. 
    
   Sometimes she thought that she thought too much - and then after 
  a few moments of internal debate she would realize she had 
  become immersed in thinking about thinking. 
  It was at times like this that she forced herself out the 
  door and in the direction of something that either frightened 
  her (a little) or something that  had little or nothing to 
  do with rational thought.

  Oddly, it was Mamoru-kun who seemed to understand this better than most.
  He understand and valued her intellect but also simply her need "to be."

   She loved to go to the public swimming pool but had lately 
  been a little self-conscious about her bathing suit.
  It had somehow gotten smaller in all the wrong places and the
  material had begun to form little fuzzy pills.
  She also loved the freedom of her bike.
  Riding her bike to the park allowed her to feed the birds with out 
  thinking about aerodynamics.
  The park also brought the possibility of a game of chess with an old
  friend and petting the animals others walked.
  (no pets were supposed to be in her condo).

   Then there was that other
  -Shopping.
   Shopping in a new neighborhood was an example of the
  scary sort of thing (she really didn't like crowds all that much) 
  but often she profitted from these mini-adventures by navigating
  new streets and finding new and delightful things.
 
   Ami knew that part of her brain suffered just as much from 
  over-use as straining muscles too much while lifting weights.
  She knew that she often ignored the "fun" parts of her life 
  more than she should as well.
   She also knew that her thoughts on the future were important.
  and that as a protector and advisor to a future queen 
  her views would have impact in these and many other issues.
  
   - Not to mention being her friend and keeping her from 
  eating all the goodies a happier voice inside 
  her said and she felt her lips pull her smile larger.
     
   "What are you thinking about?"
  
   Ami startled and saw her mother standing in the doorway 
  a huge mug of coffee cupped in her hands.
  
   "Um.." Ami began not quite sure what to say.
  
   Her mother strolled over to the table and examined the book 
  Ami was reading.

   "Oh, I see. A boy." Her smile was teasing.
  
   "Mother!"
  
   "Who is it...the one you are always writing to?"
  
   Ami thought of Urawa and blushed.
  
   "No, I was just...um.."
  
   "It's perfectly healthy for a young girl to think about 
  sex you know."
  
   "But..But...." Ami could feel the heat of the blush across 
  her face and more. She felt as if her entire body was 
  glowing.
   Her mother set the mug carefully on the table and gently 
  with her right hand tilted the girl's blushing face upward 
  to meet her gaze.
  
   "Got you." she sad and broke into laughter.
  
   "Mu-ther!" The flustered girl protested.
  
   "Oh Ami....if you could see your face. " Her mother had 
  tears of laughter in her eyes.
  
   "You are so clinical sometimes...so stiff, and when you 
  actually face something that you have an emotional response 
  to you just melt."
 
   Ami still blushed furiously but could not help but 
  beginning to giggle at her mother's words.
  
   "You know who remind me of little one?"
  
   "Who?"
  
   "Your father."
  
   "Father?" Ami asked hesitantly.  
  
   "Oh, yes.  He's always been like that.
   All you have to do is say something to him an it can set 
   him off.  I'm not talking about being rude or anything.
   Just showing him something he hasn't quite seen."
  
   "I don't understand."
  
   "Oh, I guess it's all a matter of perspective.
  Yes, I know that it sounds strange but yes, your father, 
  the great painter of the classical nude was and is the easiest person
  in the world to make blush. You just have to step sideways away from his 
  little world of angles and curves and into the human world.
  And the funniest thing is, once you've shown him one  different way
  of seeing something he finds it hard to forget it.
  of his mind. He can take that glimpse and use it in the mast amazing ways.
  It's always there, even if it just sits almost-hidden in the back

  I think that's what first attracted me to him -his blushes."
  
   Her mother paused. 
 
   "Mother?"
 
   "Yes little one?"
 
   "You still love him?"
 
   "Oh yes, as much as the first day we met."
 
   "But...?"
 
   "Then why are we never together?"
 
   Ami nodded. It was something she had always wondered about 
  but awkwardly something she had always been afraid to ask.
  
   "Because as well as loving him I also understand him. My 
  life here with you - working at the hospital, lecturing, this is the
  life I chose. His life, painting -whoever knows where, is the life he 
  chose. Neither of us would choose the other's life or force 
  anyone to choose ours.
  We aren't in exile we do see each other -you know that.
  Just  perhaps as much as we -and you wish we could."
  
   "I have..." Her mother paused and started again.
   "Your father and I have wanted to talk to you 
  about this - have tried to a little, but the words just never 
  seemed to be the right ones and neither of us perhaps felt that we 
  could find those words. To be honest, it was an intimidating task 
  and one which I hope I didn't just confuse even more."
  
   "You do understand?" She asked anxiously. 
   
  Ami nodded slowly and she could feel the lines of puzzlement 
  fade from her brow -she did understand  and she was relieved.
  
   "I think so," she said. 
   "I always knew you cared for each other" she continued,
   "but somehow I just couldn't ask you either.
  Ami let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding and saw 
  her mother do a similar thing.                                  
   "I love you both so much that I didn't really want to hear 
  any other reason....I just hoped." Ami's eyes began to fill 
  with tears, blurring her sight. She wanted to take her glasses 
  off and wipe them but she also didn't want her mother to see.
  
   She had anyway.
  
   "Oh little one." Her mother rose and came to her. She
  carefully removed her daughters' glasses setting out of 
  harm's way before holding the crying girl to her.
   
   "Oh my dearest one."
  
   "Mama" Ami sobbed. She didn't know why she was crying. 
  It made no sense. Her parents loved each other and they 
  loved her what could there to be to cry about?
  
   "Mama?" She looked up into her mothers' face.
  
   "Yes my dearest? I'm here." Ami's mother gently stroked 
   her daughter's hair. 
  
   "Why are you crying?"
  
   "Because." her mother's laugh spoke for her. "Because 
  I'm so happy. "
  
   "I'm happy too." Ami said. And she was. She
  burrowed her head into her mothers' side and let the 
  tears fall.
                           ****
   Some time had passed and Ami was pouring a fresh cup of 
  coffee for her mother.  The elder Mizumo was not needed at 
  the hospital for some time and was spending some valued time 
  with her daughter.
  Ami had explained her concerns and the medical book 
  which she had been reading earlier.
  Her mother's explanations had set her more at ease but not 
  totally.
   
  "I still feel...I don't know...wrong, taking those things." 
  she said finally.          
  
   "Well, you shouldn't worry." she was re-assured. "I mean 
  look at it this way in a logical process.
   1. You are suffering from a perfectly natural condition.
   2. The condition is treatable.
   3. The best form of treatment has been prescribed.
   4. The physician who prescribed the said treatment is an 
   expert in her field.
   "and finally," her mother concluded, shaking a finger in 
  mock sternness. " #4 is also your mother and she (in this 
  case) knows best. Alight?"
  
   "All-alight Mama."
  
   "Good. Now about what I said about that young man 
  earlier..."
  
   "Mu-ther!."
  
   "I know." Her mother said, "I was just teasing. You are far 
  to serious sometimes you know. I have seen some of the 
  letters you post however and they have seemed pretty large. 
  What are you doing exchanging novels?"
 
   Ami flushed lightly. 
  
   "Just talking." She replied. "You know it's strange. We've 
  been pen-pals for several months but we've never actually met.
  We both have so much in common and we both like the same 
  sorts of books but we've only actually talked on the 
  telephone 5 or six times.  

   "I do like Urawa-kun or at least I think I do but really, we
  don't get together or anything...I guess don't even  know 
  him. But still, in a way I DO" she stressed the last hoping 
  her mother would understand what she meant -at least a 
  little. She sighed, 
   "He even suggested we use the computer to talk to each 
  other but I like writing letters. It's more....ah....real."
  
   "So, DO you plan on meeting him?" Her mother asked.
  
   "Well..."Ami said slowly wishing that SHE had picked the 
  time for this instead of simply having it come out.
  "There is a school holiday coming up in a month and Usagi
  has asked me and a few other girls to go with her family to 
  an Onsen. They try and go every year. 
  Uwara-kun lives a few kilometers from there.
  We decided to meet if... well if you said it was okay."
    
   She looked into her mother's eyes hoping that her mother 
  could sense her honesty in this.
   "I was going to ask you sometime when we could talk about 
  it."
  
   "So you could talk me into it if I said no?"
  Her mother had a smile on her lips when she said this.
  But, Ami more than usually concerned with what was going on inside
  a person had never quite been able to fathom all of her mother's
  expressions.

   "Um...no. Just so I could ask you when you wern't 
  pressured about work or anything."
   
  "Hmmmm."
  
   "He sent me his picture last month... would you like to 
  see it?"
  
   Her mother nodded.
   Ami opened the textbook and handed her mother the plastic
  -covered photo..
  Her mother watched the process and took it.
 
   "Just happened to have it with you?" she asked..
  
   Ami looked down face flushed a red that tinged her 
  collar-bone.
  
   "Well....I...I find that it makes a good bookmark."
 
   "Hmm...I see...I guess it makes it hard to forget your 
  place anyway. He seems good looking enough if perhaps a 
  little plain." 
 
   "Plain? ...Mother!  He's...um...fine I guess." Ami quickly
  tried to turn her protest into indifference.
 
   "Ah..I see." Her mother tried to hold back a smile. Her 
  daughter may keep her head in books but she wasn't blind to 
  the outside world either. She felt a surge of pride and 
  happiness for her.
  It was good to see her Little One growing up but it was also good
  to see the hesitation as well. She approved of the slow
  growth of her fledgling romantic relationship.
  She had seen far to much during her rotations to the emergency
  rooms what lack of caution could lead to.

   "Well," The Elder Mizomo responded slowly in a thoughtful
  tone more to see her daughters' reaction than anything else. 
  She had made up her mind as soon as her daughter had asked.
   "I guess it would be alight - if your friends are 
  with you of course."
   
   "Thank you Mama. It means a lot to me." 
  
   "Yes." Her mother said looking at Ami in a way which 
  seemed to look inside her and make the young girl blush harder.
    
   "Yes I can see that.  Just make sure your expectations aren't
  too high dear sometimes people who come across one way on paper can be 
  entirely different in person"

   "I'll take care." Ami replied. "I think I can trust him
  though. and remember, if I do have nay doubts I'm sure my "escorts"
  will take care of me."
   
   Although Ami had never actually met Urawa Ryo she 
  did know him. It was all part of her confusing death and 
  rebirth a strange double life which sometimes confused her 
  and often sometimes left her shivering in the night.
  Her mother didn't need to know that no matter how much
  keeping that particular secret sometimes worried her.  
 
   She knew Urawa had no memory of the times she had spent together but
  as they wrote to each other more and more it seemed that he
  remembered "something" like the memory of a dream.

   "What are you up to this weekend - studying?" Her mother 
  asked knowing that she had indeed answered her own 
  question with the typical reply.
    
   Ami could tell because of who her mother was that she 
  had said it lightly on the off chance that it might strike 
  an uncertain nerve. She remembered times when others had asked
  the same question as a petty way of reminding the girl of her
  limited friendships -that didn't happen now.
     
   Ami nodded her head.
 
   "I guess so...well maybe...It's just that there are so
  many things I want to do...need to do.
  How can I be a doctor if I don't study?"
  unconsciously she felt herself becoming slightly defensive to 
  the harmless question.
  
   "Study is fine." Her mother answered in a soothing voice.
  "But there are other things and other ways to learn besides 
  from books."

   "Well, I was going to do some reading ahead..."
  Ami paused and considered her other option... well why not.
  Her mother raised an eyebrow sensing her daughter was not 
  finished.
   "But..." She amended the other girls are planning a 
  sleep-over...and I could go...."
  
   Her mother smiled and nodded.
  
  "You know." her mother said sipping her drink. "When
  you first started at this new school I was worried. I 
  thought that you would still be,...well... lost in your 
  work and wouldn't make many friends -you hadn't really before and..."

   "No, listen." She held her hand up blocking Ami's silent 
   protest with a fingertip upon her daughter's lips.

   "I was worried." she continued.
   "This is the time of life - this age, when you make connections.
  This is the time when you can make a friend who will be there for
  you in later life. favors and friends are important. Also, although we
  haven't talked much about it this is a time in which those who have no
  friends can be very vulnerable.
  It can be a cold world out there for someone without friends no
  matter how smart they are."
  
   "I know." Ami said quietly.
 
   "Oh my child."

   "It's alight mother. - Really."
  Ami said smiling the beginnings of a shy smile.
   "I really wasn't ready to have many friends before 
  -honestly. I don't think I would have known what or how to deal 
  with them.
  But, I DO have friends now. Good friends who I care very 
  much about."
 
   "I know you do dear." Her mother answered. "And from seeing 
  you with them I sense they feel the same about you. You 
  know... Sometimes it's strange thinking about you.. before. 
  Now it seems that these friends of yours have always been 
  around."
    
   "I think they have in a way." Ami said and finished her 
  coffee.                                       
                           *******
  
   The rest of the morning was uneventful and after writing 
  Urawa (somehow the "-kun" dropped off in the familiarity of her 
  thoughts) a brief letter (only 3 pages!) telling him that their 
  meeting was on Ami packed up some things which she was 
  going to bring to the sleep-over and went shopping with her 
  mother.
  
   Her mother's hectic hours had made Ami independent in some 
  ways but it was good to spend time with her. It was good to 
  be reminded she needed things as opposed to making the 
  lists herself and shopping for the house. It was even good in 
  a strange way she thought to be embarrassed by her mother 
  (well maybe not that much) when her mother had suggested (in 
  a way which made her wince) that she was open to investing 
  in a few new bras as she had noticed.. well she had 
  noticed...
  
   As the two shopped for the garments in question Ami grew hot and
  red as her mother suggested items that seemed 
  -well frivolous.
   Her mother argued back that they were just as functional as the
  "frumpy" ones Ami had bought for herself (her words not Ami's).
  She argued that a few items of silk mixed with the cotton were
  indeed as functional and they had the added bonus of appearance 
  and that *did* make a difference if only a psychological one. 
  Didn't her friends have pretty things?
  Didn't she even feel the slightest desire to wear them?
  
   Ami shrugged in hopeless desperation.
  She guessed so.
  
  And, her mother had argued, what was so wrong with feeling pretty?
  
   Ami had argued practicality, price and durability although she was 
  becoming more and more swayed by the texture and design of some of 
  the of the material and her mother's insistence.
  In the end they reached a compromise (although Ami suspected that 
  this had been her mother's goal all along. ) and along with 
  Ami's "practical" choices  some of her mother's suggestion were 
  purchased.
   
   As Ami watched the saleswoman wrap the lacy garments in their 
  individual packages of soft crepe she decided her mother might have 
  been right.
  Both Ami and her mother know she had perversely enjoyed her mothers 
  teasing coaxing.
  Both seemed to understand that this was the method to draw the shy 
  girl out and interact with a mother she saw so rarely during the 
  week. 
   Her mother's gentle teasing continued as they looked for a new
  bathing suit for the upcoming trip, her mother suggesting scandalous
  things that only Rei would wear and then laughing in a way which
  made Ami think of someone more her age than that of a mature woman 
  of 38.
   She laughed with an unfetterd clearness when she was really and 
  truly free on days like this -  a-lot like Minako, Ami noticed
  smiling to herself. 
   
   Mother and daughter, they were so different Ami thought looking 
  at the reflection in the large store mirrors 
  -as if these were two people she had just glanced at for a moment
   rather than really knew.

    
   Watching her mother trying on sun-dresses and posing before the 
  mirrors like a model (and then spoiling it by laughing.),
   Ami wished that she could look like that some day.
 
   Her mother looked more like a dancer than a doctor with her 
  long and graceful legs. Her form delicate but yet obviously 
  womanly. Her face finely structured with luminous eyes of a deep 
  violet
   Her mother's face was strange in the fact that no matter how she
  really felt she seemed to be a little sad or wistful.
  Ami knew however that this was just part of her mother's deep
  sensitivity and that she could also produce wry grins or
  tighten her lips to show disapproval.
   Her mother rarely got angry or upset with her or 
  anything around the home but she remembered vividly the day 
  when she had almost been struck by a reckless driver at a 
  road-crossing. Her mother had appeared out of nowhere and 
  swept her to safety and then turned her ire on the driver.
  
   Despite her petite frame she had grabbed the man (who was 
  quite obviously drunk) and pulled him from his car. 
   Then, as the man had swung at her she had just seemed to touch him 
  gently but that soft blurring touch had flattened the fellow, 
  waiting peacefully then until police arrived to take her statement.
   
   Ami looked at her own  delicate and fine-boned hands 
  -musicians hands     
  -doctors hands, and knew as well that she was in her own way 
  also a warrior.
  
   She smiled.  
  Maybe she wasn't beautiful but she had her mother's hands.
      
   "Ami?" Her mother's voice startled her out of her thoughts.
  "So you like it?" Her mother performed a twirl.
    
   "Um...it looks really good...well, maybe except for the hat."
  Ami slowly replied trying to think how her mother would respond 
  to her question.
  She wasn't sure and so asked it anyway.
   
   "I was just thinking about how pretty you are Mama." She continued.
  "Do you ever think...do you ever think that I'll ever be...
  you know...." her voice trailed off...
   
   Her mother came over and kissed her gently on the forehead.
  
   "You already are." she whispered. "You already are...
   but, My Dearest my beloved girl... I'm going to buy the hat."

   Ami felt heat rise to her face at the the compliment, and shook her head
  at her mother's wilful silliness..
              
               *****           
               
   Ami's mother parked at the foot of Sendai Hill where the
  Hikawa Shrine was situated. She helped her daughter get 
  her overnight and sleeping bags from the trunk while she 
  herself carried two other grocery bags
  -things she had insisted Ami bring.
  Most of these Ami had planned on getting herself 
  -some she had not.
  The items in dispute were some North American style "coolers"
  - carbonated fruit drinks with alcohol.
   Those and the recently purchased nightdress -white cotton with a 
  hint of lace about the collar, sleeves and hem-line.
  (Ami had decided to leave that in her bag and instead stick with 
  her previous choice.)

   About the coolers, well, she just was not sure about them.
  Ami's mother had insisted that there actually were times when it 
  was both socially and medically acceptable for young ladies to 
  poison themselves with "alcoholic toxins" (Ami's words not 
  her mothers.) and slumber parties were one of the accepted 
  times.
  Her final argument for this came in the form of
   
   "Well, if you feel like you do not want to it is your choice 
   to simply not drink. To accept whether someone drinks or not 
   is a part of becoming an adult."
   
   Ami still disagreed internally but gave in.
  Hopefully her friends would have the maturity to say "no"
  (Although she did admit the bottles did look enticing...)     
  She knew that they were different than beer or sake and from what 
  she could read of the english on the label (most of it) that they were
  berry flavored. She considered...after all social sips of plum wine
  wern't that bad....
    
   Climbing the broad steps up the hill to the Temple a figure became 
  visible.
   Rei's Grandfather was sweeping the stone courtyard as soon as Ami 
  and her mother crested the top he rushed over in that alarming way of his. 
  
   It was frightening, thought a part of Ami's mind which was 
  detached from the vision of the oncoming lecher,
  to see how fast the old man moved when motivated by
  a short skirt or a flash of leg.
    
  "Ah Ami." he bowed to her and she did likewise respectfully 
  (He was after all a priest - hentai or not)
  "Rei is here along with the other girls  who have showed up. 
  Who is this beauty you have brought with you? Your sister?
   Has she considered a religious vocation?"
    
  "Ummmmm..." Ami said startled.
   
   "Gomen, Sensei. " Ami's mother said bowing deeply with a 
  fluidity that still made Ami envious (when she thought of 
  such things).
   "Unfortunately the Kami's have woven a different thread for 
  me." She said. "I simply doctor to bodies not souls."
 
   The old man looked at her closely and leaned the 
  hand-crafted broom against one of the Temple-yards grey stone
  walls.
   
   "May I see your hands my child?" He asked.
     
   Ami's mother placed the shopping bags down  at her sides  
  and extended her hands palms down.
  The old priest took them gently and held them for a moment 
  before turning them over and clasped them for a moment 
  then looked up at the woman face beaming.
   
   "You say you doctor bodies and not souls but your aura speaks 
   otherwise. I think by doing the first you also do a little 
   of the second as well."
 
    Ami's mother began to flush at the compliment.    
  
   "No,"  The priest said. "I'm not flattering you. I'm simply 
  telling what you already know... and maybe need to be 
  reminded from time to time."
   
   Ami's mother bowed again and Ami simply stood agog.
   
   "Now you" The old man fixed her with his eye.
  "I believe you have a power to become truly spiritual"
  He sighed "If only Rei would let me try and convince you a 
  little more. I have the feeling that you would make a 
  perfect shrine maiden."
   
   "Thank you." Ami said quickly. "But I..."
   
   "I know, I know." The old man said waving a hand at her..
  "You have other plans as well."  
  "Today's young girls....I wish..." He sighed heavily
  and Ami wasn't quite sure if she was happy or not that he 
  hadn't finished his sentence.
  
  "Regretfully," The old man's face looked sad.
  "I would invite you in for a cup of tea but my apprentice
  and myself are off to complete rituals of purification 
  this evening."
   "My Granddaughters' suggestion" he said mournfully.
     
   "I see." Mrs. Mizumo said a twinkle in her eye.
  "Young girls can be so willful"
     
   "Hai." The old man agreed and escorted them to his home.
     
   After bowing to Rei's grandfather (who wandered off) 
  Mrs. Mizumo set her bags down. 
    
   "Now before I go give your old mother a hug."
     
   "You're not old Ami said." Embracing her mother and 
  feeling those strong and gentle arms enfolding her.
  Holding her close Ami sighed.
  Her mother did not smell of the usual smells - of 
  disinfectant and assorted other hospital things, she smelled 
  lightly rather of violets.
   
  "I love you my little one."
   
  "I love you too Mama."   

                      ***

   Seeing her mother off ( to where she would quickly pay her 
  respects to the shrine.) Ami knocked politely upon the door.
  (She would, if this produced no effect try the doorbell, 
  but using a Miko's doorbell seemed sort of 
  ...contradictory.              
                       
   She was surprised to be met at the door by her friend 
   Minako instead of Rei.
 
   "Rei's sort of ...um...busy." she said.

   Ami could hear exactly what Rei was busy at.
     
  "You idiot! I told you and Grandfather that these rooms were 
  off-limits tonight."
 
   "Well I..."
  
   "You what? Wanted to sneak a peak at a bunch of girls in 
  skimpy nightgowns? In their underwear? Maybe catch us naked?
  Just what kind of pervert wants to stare at a young naked 
  girl ESPECIALLY if she's a Shrine Maiden?"

   "I uh..."
  
   "You know that sort of thing makes me sick. Why are you and 
  Grandpa still here anyway? I thought you were going to purify 
  yourselves? Ha! Some purification. hentai. Get out!"

   Ami and Mina watched as a sad looking Yuichiro slunk out of 
  another room followed by continuing protestations.
  He was carrying a couple of fluffy white towels.
  
  Just before exiting he turned beseeching eyes to Minako.
  
   "My sensei, Rei's Grandfather said I should get us a couple 
  of towels. He said after sitting under a waterfall all night 
  we would have to either dry off or freeze. That a holy man 
  would test his body in purification but only a stupid man 
  would catch a cold after."

   "I know." Minako said in an understanding tone which gave Ami the 
  feeling that either the girl was being as honestly caring 
  as she sounded -or was up to something. 
  She patted the forlorn acolyte on the hand as she continued.
  
   "And I also told you to be quick about getting them.
  You know how she..." She gestured at the way he had come with a
  thumb and sneakily winked at Ami "...can be.
  Honestly, It's only four in the afternoon. 
  I'm sure none of us will be even thinking about getting naked until
  about six."

  Ami stared goggle-eyed and Yuichiro began to turn the 
  colour of red-bean paste.

   Minako laughed then - a clear and innocent sound.
  
   "I'm teasing you great silly." she said to Yuichiro who with 
  reddened face avoided her glance.
   
   "Oh...Ya...ha ha..." The young man said weakly looking 
   embarrassed. "I...I knew that."

   "I think Rei's a bully." Ami suddenly blurted surprising the two others
  as well as herself. She then found herself moving to defend the girl she
  had just slighted.
  She quickly added. "Well, sort-of. She's nice and thoughtful
   but sometimes she over-reacts and takes far to much advantage."

   "I think...ah...I think she's not that bad." said Yuichiro 
  sounding a trifle defensive. He shuffled his feet as he stared down 
  at them
   "I mean she's you know...maybe, well she's...."

   Somehow the whole episode had made Ami feel a little bolder 
  than usual. It seemed unfair that Rei continually used 
  The man as a door-mat. It was also unfair that he let her of 
  course.
   "Let me tell you a secret," Ami said lowering her voice in a 
  conspiratorial manner 
   "Just between us three."
 
   She gestured Yuichiro closer and Minako also bent to hear 
  what she was saying.

   "Do you remember when she said that your impure thoughts were 
  clouding up the temple and you had to purify yourself?"

   He nodded.

   "Well guess what she did?"
 
   "What?" both Minako and Yuichiro asked.
 
   "Don't tell, but she peeked at you."
 
   "Wha.....?"

   The red colour was returning rapidly.
     
   "Are you still here?" Rei entered ther room, red-faced for 
  another reason.
 
  "Well I ....."  Yuichiro stammered looking back and forth from the 
  doorway to Ami, To Minako, anywhere but at Rei.
  
   "I thought so. Rei said. "Well stop it!" 
    
   He beat a hasty retreat.
 
   "Ami," Rei said demonstrating her super ability of becoming The
  Incredible 180 Degree Mood Swing Girl.
   
   "I'm so glad you could  make it. I was worried
  that you would simply dive into those books
  you seem to always have and forget to come up 
  for a breath of air. Forgive me for not greeting you personally."
   She bowed deeply.
    
   Ami returned the bow.
  
   "Great, you brought stuff." Rei exclaimed happily when Ami 
  showed her the bags of goodies. 
   "Usagi." She said darkly, "Has been eating me out of house 
  and home even though everybody  - well everybody but her  
  brought something to eat." 

   "Actually she did bring some jam buns." Minako said
   "But that didn't make it here."

   "She said she gave them to orphans." Rei said scowling.
   "Singing orphans."

   Minako explained  "Luna said Usagi's parents rented that musical
   "Oliver" last night."

   Ami sighed.

   "If her lies were even a bit convincing..." Rei continued
  her voice rising and Ami felt the need for mediation on her absent
  friends behalf

   "If she told believable lies." Ami said, "She's be a sneak...as it is
  she's...."

   "Just Usagi." Rei conceded her lips twisting in the beginning of a
  smile "Singing orphans, Indeed."

   "Oooooh!" in rummaging Rei had found one of the coolers.
   "Ami is that what I think it is?  Naughty!" she grinned and 
  wagged a finger.
    
   "My Mother's idea." Ami said lamely looking at the floor.
   
   "You know." Rei said brightly. "I do so like your mother..."
  She picked up the bags of goodies and headed for the 
  kitchen."Makoto brought some plum wine as well so it looks like 
  it really WILL be a party.
    Oh, by the way, everyone is in the living room
  -well Usagi reading my manga in my room but I chased her out.
  Anyway,  you can put your sleeping bag and stuff in the living room
  'cause we'll have more room there.
  I'll take these."
  
   She waved off the other two girls off with a shoo-ing motion.
  Just before she left the room she turned and said in a 
  thoughtful sort of wistful tone "You know. Yuichiro's 
  kinda cute when he's embarrassed." She giggled.
   
   Ami shook her head.  She would have loved to one day say 
  she understood her friends mercuric mood-swings but that 
  seemed to be one of those things best left up to someone with 
  more mental acumen than she.   
  
   She was amazed at herself as well. What made her do that?
  The girl who hated those sorts of pranks...
  She supposed that she had just had a little bit more of Rei's 
  attitude than she could take.
  It was odd, since it was not her - or even Usagi who bore the brunt this 
  time.
   Maybe the tugs of attraction between the shrine maiden and the 
  young man needed something to "break the ice"?
   Well, she thought, she guessed that the young man's thoughts  
  right now would at least keep him warm in the icy spring. 
 
   Minako followed Ami and put her hand tentatively on her arm to 
  cause the other girl to hesitate.
    
   "Ami." she said in an accusing voice -her eyes narrowed.
      
   "You lied to Yuichiro."
 
   Ami had the good grace to feel herself flush.
     
   "Well, maybe a little..."
    
   "A little?"
     
   "Well," Ami said. "I know that when Yuichiro was out 
  purifying himself we actually spent most of the night together 
  fighting that giant jelly-mould thing."
 
   "Uh-huh." Minako nodded.
  
   "But the time before that...Remember what Rei said about 
  his "cute goose-bummpy buns"?" Ami felt herself blushing 
  further.
   
   "Ah." Minako said. "So she did peek....just not then."
  
   Ami nodded, and the girls began to laugh.  
                       
                           ***

   "So Artemis got me to get this cat-nip extract at the pet shop and
  then he got Makoto and me to make this sweet little pillow." Minako said.
   - well actually Makoto made it. She's just a little better at 
  sewing and stuff.
  Anyway,We put a couple of drops on the pillow and he gave it to Luna 
  as an apology for what he did last week. I know it would be 
  wrong to say she was blotto or anything but... well...she's 
  happy and not as tense as usual."
   
   "Is that right?" Ami asked frowning. "I mean isn't it like 
  we are drugging her or something."
 
   "Well, not really, I mean cats like catnip don't they?. 
  Artemis told me he just felt that Luna just needed to relax 
  for a change. That she had trouble doing it around us because 
  she felt so protective."
   "I was a teeny bit concerned and talked about it with Makoto and she
  agreed. And," Minako paused her eyes alight.
   "She may just do something goofy. Artemis says that Luna always says that
  catnip doesn't affect her like normal cats but that's just 
  because she just never really remembers it. Well, you saw how 
  goofy she got in that vacant lot a few weeks ago.
  Anyway, about her remembering -or not remembering Artemis said
  something about a mental lock."
 
   "Mental block." Ami corrected her friend.
  
   "Ya, whatever. Anyway, most of the extract will fade in a day 
  or so and just leave her with a nice smelling pillow. Think 
  about it this way....If YOU had to worry about Usagi 24 hours a 
  day woudn't you be strung up?"
                                         
   "Strung out." Ami said. "Strung up" is American slang for 
  hanging."
   
   "Whatever." Minako said."Same thing."
   
                 ************* 

   After Ami arrived the slumber party, the party part of the evening
  really began in earnest.
   Ami mused that such events must in some way be culturally 
  universal - they could have been in any part of the world at almost 
  any time.  (Actually she wanted to write a book about such things someday).
  Makoto put down the cookbook she was browsing through and got up and hugged
  her friend.

   "I see even your brain gets cooked from to much studying" She joked.

    "I'll leave the cooking to you." Ami replied.

    "Mmmmm brains." Minako said in imitation of a ghoul from a movie
  and the others laughed.

   Her friends may have teased her about her bookishness sometimes but
  when it came down to it, Well, it just wasn't really fun
  unless they were there - all of them,  and enjoying themselves.
  Ami felt so good with her friends like she was a part of something.
  And really, she guessed she was.
  Her mother had been right about her not fitting in before.
  Now, simply and with an ease she seldom felt unless she was swimming
  - she did.
  Everybody, all of her friends did at least one thing well and were
  respected for that as well as just being who they were.
  Ami now actually felt a little shiver of pride when her friends
  jokingly called her "the Brainiac"
  before it had been a kind of brand. now it was it was almost like a
  pet name of sorts.
  The others counted on her brains and her courage as much as much as
  Makoto's strength or Rei's mystical ability and she in turn
  counted on, and was bolstered up by them.

   "How is everyone?" Ami asked the chestnut-haired girl.

   Makoto sighed and gestured, managing to shrug at the same time.

  Things were not right in the world. This was apparent.
  Of course, Ami supposed that things were sort-of of like usual
  but this didn't make them any better.

   Artemis was lying on his stomach twisting about on the floor
  and making small "mrrrt." sounds. He sighed as Minako bent down to
  rub his stomach.
  Actually, he had giggled at first as Minako had cooed about "his 
  furry little tummy."

   Ami looked on in bemusement as Usagi and Luna played with a bit of
  red yarn. She honestly couldn't tell who was having more fun as the
  two rolled about the floor giggling.
  Ami had seen the usually stoic guardians at play before but somehow
  they seemed even more relaxed than ever.
   She supposed it was the catnip. She giggled at the look on Luna's
  face as she batted at the string, the cat's usually
  regal image broken by Luna's protruding (happy cat) tongue. -well,
  and her giggles.

   Ami waived a chiding finger at them.

   "I think you people need me as a chaperone" She said in mock severity.

   Makoto, eyes a-twinkle nodded.

   "Just put that stuff over there." Rei said gesturing with her free hand
  as she brought in an armload of small pillows.
  "That way it all should be out of the way."
   She dumped the small, colourful puffy items in a scattered heap and
  then surveyed them in satisfaction as if she had just created
  a masterpiece of modern art.

   Ami put the rest of her things down and went with Makoto to the kitchen
  to help her arrange some pastries.
  She returned and was just about to pick up a fashion magazine with
  the quiz "How smart is your Mate" (for purely academic reasons)
  when it happened.

   "Food." Makoto said emerging with a bottle in one hand and plate of
   sugar-dusted cream buns in the other.

   The announcement proved to be a mistake.

   Usagi was a blur of action as she leapt up from her seat and launched
  herself like a cruise missile towards the plate of sweets.
  Cruise missiles however are not 16 year old girls whose
  legs and frame have grown so fast that their sense of balance
  (if they ever had one) failed to catch up.

   "Whoops!"

   Usagi twisted in mid-air.
  Arms pinwheeling she reached out for something -anything and she again
  fought her neverending battle against evil and her oldest and
  cruelest foe - gravity.
  She had slipped of course.
  (she must have slipped on something 
  - but she couldn't just slip on nothing could she?)   

   Ami could never quite see how this girl could move from
  being the gentle princess one moment to the hyper klutz 
  the next. 
  The next few seconds happened in slow motion as Usagi 
  practically flew across the cedar floor.

   The other girls watched in helpless amazement as objects
  in her path seemed to launch themselves skyward seemingly 
  before she even came in contact with them.  
  Two sleeping bags soared like odd blue marshmallows
  and the cream -buns (which seemed to far away to be affected)
  shot off the plate in Makoto's hand like an invasion of tiny saucers
  leaving sugary puffs of exhaust.

   Luna gave a very un-catlike shriek and darted out of the
  way of the Amazing Unstopable Girl.
  The wall loomed ever closer.
  The other overnight bags which had survived the first onslaught
  vied for "Best dynamic portrayal of an airbag."
  Across the room a pile of manga toppled in sympathy 

   From Ami's bag at Usagi's feet skittered a small plastic
  container.
  Somehow it's tiny clatter did not go unnoticed.
  With the eyes of the very hungry, The eyes which combined all that was
  alert in both predator and scavenger, Usagi suddenly recovered,
  - swooped.
  
   "What cool little blue candies. Can I have one? How do you 
  open this thing?"
  She was already fiddling with the plastic now without waiting for
  an answer.
  
  "And some yellow ones too."
  She popped one into her mouth and savored it with the 
  look of an expert.
   
   "Not lemon at all." She said in disappointment.
  She popped another yellow one.
       
   "Huh...just tastes like sugar. Hey," She stopped,
     
   "What  are you guys looking  at me like that for? "
          
   The rest of the room's attention (except for Ami) was focused
  on Usagi with a sort of bug-eyed intentness. If any of the
   group had been listening they could have heard Luna's already
   wobbley jaw had hit the floor with an audible thump.
    
   Artemis watched the ongoing preceding and a million 
  possibilities and alternate futures burned through his 
  tiny (but brilliant) kitty brain. Momentarily all 
  thought functions stopped. Elvis had left the building.
    
   "They're hormone tablets." Ami said quietly,
   " - birth control pills."
  Her chin was buried in her chest, her voice muffled.
       
   "Akk." said Usagi and one of the small yellow tablets fell 
  from her tongue to the polished wooden floor.

   Glucose goo.

   "PPpppppbbbbttttt....." yellowish drool was spat.
     
   "Hey Bozo that's my floor!" Rei called at her wrinkling her nose,
  disgusted at both her friends actions and the resulting mess.
    
   Usagi ignored her and clutched at her throat.
     
   "I'm styrene! I'm styrene." she moaned.
   
   "That's sterile you moron." Rei snapped."Even I know styrene is plastic."

   "Usagi is plastic?" Minako said in confused wonderment.

   Makoto eyed them all in surprised disbelief.
  She wasn't exactly sure what was going on herself but also
  knew there was probably a sensible explanation.
   She speculatively eyed the unopened cooler in her hand
  (which she had brought out of the kitchen to settle a dispute
  with Rei on the amount of alcohol that was actually in the things)
  and was sorely tempted.

   "The future is doomed!" A giddy and distressed Luna cried. "Woe, oh woe!"
   And promptly fell over snoring. 
  Artemis looked at her in amusement and shook his head. 
   "Maybe the whole catnip thing wasn't a good idea after all."
  He remarked dryly.

                                   ****
   After that, Luna was snuggled into a cat basket in another room
  under the watchful eye of her feline companion. 
  -Truth be told he had first been informed in no uncertain terms by his 
  ward that what Ami had to say was really none of his business 
  -that and a bribe of tunafish. 
 
   Shortly after that Naru had arrived.
  
   She had sensed the tension and stared at the various expressions
  upon her friends faces but had decided to simply see what was going 
  on.
   
   Minako, taking pity on the bewildered girl had filled her in in a
  series of fast whispers. Makoto had then corrected these with
  whispers of her own.
  Naru had said nothing but her moth gaped in surprise when she
  had gotten all of the story.

   Ami simply sat staring at the other girls waiting for one of them to 
  say something.
   
   They didn't.
   
   Their expressions held curiosity and sympathy for her embarrassment 
  but nothing else.
  
   Rei continued to glare at Usagi who was still clutching her throat
  and letting out the occasional gurgle.

   "I...I suppose." She said softly.
   "I..suppose. You might want an explanation or something."

   "No."
  
   Ami looked at Usagi. 
   Usagi's eyes shone with what could only be described as pure 
  undistilled gentleness. 

   "Ami, If it's something you want to tell us about then you can tell 
  us. If it's something you think we should know about then tell us. If 
  you feel awkward about it or don't want to then don't. Ami, nothing
  you could ever tell us would be wrong. You might shock us, or 
  surprise us but we know who you are. Ami, if there was ever one with 
  a Pure Heart it would be you."
 
   Ami was both startled and comforted by her words.
  The mention of the Heart Crystals (however indirectly) was of course
  only the Sailor Senshi knew about but she saw Naru nod her head in 
  agreement with the rest.
  She could feel herself almost choking at the trust of her friends 
  and she felt her eyes sting slightly as they blurred with moisture.
  Her tears  at the trust her friends had in her ran freely as did her 
  words.
 
   "Well as you know these are birth control pills."  She held up the 
  package she had clutched in her hand and saw Naru bite back her 
  reaction in a soft inhalation.
   -hearing it straight from the source was different from an 
  explanation.
  
   "I take them every day. I have since about a year ago."
   Her voice took an almost text-book tone in her recitation.
    
   "The disease is Endo-mitriosis.
  It's a problem that is genetically caused either by heredity or by
  mis-information or "noise" in the genetic code. 
  It's usually detected when a girl is older than me -sometimes as 
  old as 30 but I have a good doctor." 
  
   She smiled a sad smile.
     
   "What happens in a woman who develops this is the formation of
  patches of cells: cells which make up the uterine wall form in 
  other places. Normally it is the job of these types of cells to act
  as an anchoring place for the fertilized ovum.
  If an egg is not fertilized these cells on the uterine wall usually 
  and naturally slough off to be replaced by new ones.
  "Unfortunately." Ami's voice quavered. "Unfortunately, if these 
  cells form elsewhere they cause internal bleeding on a monthly 
  basis.
  In it's least harmful it can lead to an iron deficiency - which 
  is almost normal. In most more common situations increased 
  cramping and pain. In the worst case all of these plus blood poisoning
  from hemorhaging large amounts into the abdominal cavity.
  
   "In my case." She continued. The effects made themselves known 
  with painful cramping and anemia.   
  One of the mildest forms of treatments are hormonal -the use of 
  androgen or estrogen.
  One of the administrable forms of these are oral contraceptive.
   "And," she concluded. This has so far shown results of remission."
    
   Ami gazed at the questioning faces of her friends
  and saw both the concern and relief in them.
   Usagi had been re-assured (yet again) that she would indeed
  be able to have any children she so desired.
  
   She had replied with a shaky smile that she doubted it.
  - that any of the children she desired would not have pink hair.
  She giggled after this showing that she truly didn't mean it.
  
   Naru promptly assumed that she meant that she would not like a 
  daughter like her "cousin".
  
   Usagi had simply nodded.
  Her relationship to Chibi-Usa had a tendency to ping-pong back and
  forth from loving mother-to-be to irritated older sister.
  Usagi sighed, and said she was glad she actually didn't have to
  worry about motherhood to the youngster in question as she
  was thankfully back in the future where she belonged.
  
   Ami was relieved, none of her friends had asked anything and none
  looked judgemental - simply curious.         
   
   Naru admitted that her aunt had the same sort of problem but it had 
  started in college. 
   
   Suddenly Usagi stood. 
  
   Ami could sense the change in her as did the other Senshi.
  She was no longer the clumsy girl of before -or at least not *just* 
  that girl.
   
   She was the daughter to a Queen.
   
   "Please excuse us." She said and took Ami by the hand.  
   
   Ami had little choice but to follow. 
    
   The girls went outside and Usagi silently led Ami to the  
  sculpted white gravel and large stones. 
  Stepping from boulder to boulder like rocks in a stream they ended 
  up in the middle.                                            
  
   Usagi looked up at the waxing moon.
  
   "Ami no baka." She said quietly.
  Then before Ami could speak Usagi touched the girls lips with her 
  finger-tip to silence her.
 
   "Ami, Sailor-Senshi Mercury, my friend. For someone so
   smart you can be pretty stupid sometimes. Hush, let me speak."
   She touched Ami's lips again.
   
   "Ami, as your friend I care about you deeply. As your Queen I care 
  about  you just as deeply. What hurts you hurts me."
 
   "But I didn't want to worry..."
 
   "You never do Ami. You keep so much inside and THAT makes me worry.
  I can't help it."
 
   "I'm sorry. .." Ami started again.
  
   "Shhhh..." Usagi put her hands gently upon Ami's shoulders and looked
   into her eyes.
 
   "Ami, you are so important to me. To all of us but most importantly 
  to me. Rei is like a sister to my heart. Mina, the General of my 
  Armies. Makoto, the gentle gardener of my soul. Mamoru is special in 
  a very different way. And the Outers... well.. I understand why they 
  act the way they do. I don't condone it sometimes  but they are 
  important as well."
   "But you..." Usagi bowed her head a little. "You were the first.
  You have always been the first to join me and that makes you 
  special."
   
   Suddenly Ami's vision blurred. The scene was unfamiliar but she 
  knew where she was - The Moon Kingdom during the Silver Millennium.
  She was looking into the water of a pool. She could see she was  
  plainly smaller and most certainly younger. She felt nervous and
  her reflection mirrored her feelings.
   
   "Hello?" A voice behind her.  
  
   Ami watched as she composed her features and turned. 
  
   Before her stood a small girl in a white gown. Small blond ringlets 
  protruded from a circlet of gold.

   Usagi...or rather the Moon Princess.
  
   "My Mama and your Mama say that you're 'posed to be together.
   Do you wanna be friends?"
    
   The Ami-of-the-Past nodded shyly and the Princess smiled like the 
  sun.
  She held out a chubby hand in greeting but then halted as she 
  noticed it was quite grubby.
  
  "Ooops." She said and moved closer to the pool to scrub it off. 
  
   Ami remembered the Queen's bemused expression when she found 
  the two girls playing in the water.

    
   "Usagi." Ami said and her eyes were wet.
   
   "Usagi anata baka." Usagi said. "I've made you cry."
   
   "No," Ami said "I just remembered...."
   
   Usagi nodded. "We got in trouble didn't we?"
   
   "No," Ami shook her head. "You got in trouble."
   
   "Ami, the reason we came out here..." Usagi's voice and eyes were 
  more earnest than before. "Ami, Mercury, do you trust me?"
   
  "Of course." 
  
   Usagi moved back a little and her hand passed over her breast. 
  The Star Locket which she wore almost everywhere opened. 
  The garden was flooded with silver light and Ami was almost blinded 
  from it.
  
   "It says it can heal you." Usagi said in a dreamy voice but
  SHE says I have much to learn first however and that it will take 
  time. Will you let me try then?"

   Ami knew from past experience that the SHE Usagi spoke of was a 
  curious mix of  her past memories and the guidance of her future 
  self.
  
   "I will." Ami answered.
   
   The locket closed and Usagi slumped into Ami's arms.
    
   "I'm so glad." The weakened Usagi whispered softly into her friend's
  dark wind-ruffled hair.
  
   Ami and Usagi held each other close for a moment, Ami burying her 
  face in her friends comforting breast. She felt her eyes sting
  with tears.
   
   Eventually, after letting Ami cried herself out Usagi moved her 
  gently away.
  
   The Princess of the Moon looked at her noble warrior and then 
  said in a sad voice.
   "I'm hungry."
   
   Laughing both girls headed inside.
   
                         *** 

   Ami was washing her face. The cool water washed the heat and tears
  of her embarrassment away. While water wasn't what you could call an
  active friend it was always there for her.
  Like her other friends, she thought.
     
   There was a knock on the door.
     
   "Just a second." She turned off the water and patted her face dry 
  with the large fluffy towel.
     
   She opened the door.
     
   The person standing in the hallway surprised her a bit. Then she 
  realized that it shouldn't have. It could have been any one of her 
  friends. 
       
   "I'm sorry." Rei said, and the look in her eyes suggested that she 
  was still troubled that she had jumped to any conclusions for no 
  matter how short an instant. 
  
   "It's okay." Ami replied shyly feeling a little guilty about a 
  previous comment she had made about the other girl.
   "You know, I was thinking earlier that sometimes you picked
   on us sometimes...but that's just your way isn't it?"

   Rei sighed and nodded.
  
   "I do worry about you guys. I mean Usagi's got this "Destiny" right? 
  Naru has Umino. You have the Amazing Brain, Mina is Sailor and 
  Makoto can cook better than I can dream to...she'll probably end 
  up with the best guy as well...of course it might just take her a 
  few hundred years.
  
  Both girls smiled at the though of their friend's "Quest".
    
  But...What if we goof it up somehow?  What if SHE goofs it up somehow?
   "What if...." her voice faded.
    
   "What if the person she's destined to be with was dating her best 
  friend?" Ami asked softly.

   Rei nodded silently.
  
   "It still bothers you dosen't it?" 
  
   "Yes, things could have turned out so badly for all of us. For him, 
  for Usagi... for me."
 
  "But they didn't" Ami stated.
  
   "No." Rei whispered. "But it wasn't for lack of trying... at least on 
  my part.  I LOVED him you know." She said plaintively  and then 
  corrected herself.
  "No, I still love him. I love her. - it's just in a different way.
   After we...after they got back together sometimes I would look at him 
  and see him looking at me almost the way he did before -almost.
  I know, We all know that it's over but I see them sometimes and
  feel so lonely."
  I suppose you may not know what it's like...You can't understand it
  I suppose, what it's like to be so tempted about something like that
  and then to feel horrible about it.
  When I saw those pills I started thinking about it again.
  I thought bad things about you but worse about myself.
  That way I could have him -in secret.
  I honestly don't want that either...
  But, just for a second....
  And I felt worse then about myself than  I could ever feel about 
  you -about her." 
  
  "I'm sorry." She sighed. And it wasn't just an apology to Ami.
  
   Ami felt for her friend. She knew how she felt although she had 
  never felt that way.
  
   "Rei, you should never feel that badly about yourself... there is 
  no reason for it." Ami took a deep breath.
   "I think...I think it's alight to want him -or at least feel 
  that you do
  -for now.
  I think you already know why you won't or why you can't act and those 
  are reasons that will keep you from acting no matter what you 
  think."
  "Rei." She looked deeply into her friend's violet eyes and saw 
  the sorrow in them. Rei, you can keep your memories you know and 
  just let that part of him go. I think you have already at least a 
 little.
   If you hadn't how could you and Usagi be such good friends?
   How could you and he be such good friends?"
   
   Rei's eyes softened  then and the defenses she'd built up were 
  lowered even more. Ami reached out and stroked her friend's dark 
  dark hair and continued to speak. Now she that she understood other 
  girl more it was easy to see more and more inside of her.
   "Besides, she continued. "We all know that as well as your 
  outer beauty and your sweet sweet voice that you have a pure 
  heart as well."
  For an instant she touched the smoothness of Rei's cheek removing 
  the single tear that trailed downward.
                                        
  "You really are the smart one." Rei said in a husky voice.
   She sighed and continued. 
   "I think I've met someone who will be different. He won't 
  replace Mamoru. But then I'm honestly not looking for a 
  replacement. That would be wrong both to me and to him."
   
   Ami nodded and watched as the other girl spoke seeing her sadness
 gradually replaced by enthusiasm.
  
  "When I'm feeling good I think he's someone for me, 
  not a replacement, not a make-do-with, simply somebody I can be happy 
  with. I worry about telling him just who I am though.
  The sort of things I might put him through because of who I am 
  -what I have to do."                                       
    
  "I'dd ask if you'd seen much of him." she said impishly. "But I know 
  you would never peek at Yuichiro in the bath."

   She watched as the changes danced across Rei's face her sadness 
  replaced by shock and then a flicker anger which was quickly replaced 
  by another sort of flush.
 
   "How did you know I peeked?" Rei whispered looking downward.
  
   "Cause I'm the smart one." Ami said laughing and gave her friend a 
  quick hug.

   "Oh ya," Rei giggled nervously. "I forgot."  She returned Ami's hug 
  with a quick tight squeeze of her own.

  "Do you want to know what I saw?" Rei asked and Ami felt herself
  blush.
  
  She quickly shook her head.
 
   "Ha," Rei laughed. "The Great Brain loses to the Great Blush. Come 
  on," She grabbed Ami's arm and pulled. "The others 'll think we're 
  talking about them."
 
   Naru met them at the door of the living room and smiled when she saw 
  Ami was alight. 

   "So, you guy's wanna do what we planned?"
  
   (The girls had talked about a particular plot several days before.)
    
   "You mean...?" Rei asked.
 
   Naru nodded.
 
   "Sounds good to me." Rei agreed, "But only if Ami does it."
  
   Ami was about to protest when Rei continued. "I think it'll be funny 
  but I have a little problem for doing stuff like that as a joke. It's 
  kinda...well, unprofessional. Besides.." She spread out her hands."
  "If I do it then it could SEEM mean. With Ami....."
 
   Ami understood her point.
 
   "Okay ." She said. "You know I'm not usually all that fond of 
  practical jokes.. .but this is a good one. I'dd love to know what's
  going through Usagi's head when we do it."
  
                                 *****   

   The room was dark save for the flickering of a candle.         
   
   Usagi frowned.
    
   Things weren't quite right.
     
   She watched as Ami stared into the flickering flame.
   
   Ami was wearing a red flowing robe with dragons inscribed on it 
  in gold and a turban held in place by a golden ring.
  Her face was full of concentration.
  
   "I see..." Ami began.
  
   "Yes?" Usagi's voice was a whisper and she nibbled nervously on the 
   small cake she had taken from the tray on the table.  
    
   "I see....." Ami repeated.
   
   "What....? Me? Mamo-chan? What?" Usagi's voice raised at each word.
   
   "Hsssst." The other girls hissed at her and she stuck her tongue out 
  at them.
  
    Ami looked at her sharply.
    A strange Ami whose face loomed from shadows.
                                                                          
   "The Spirits cannot be heard clearly as one of us disturbs with her 
   questions."

   Usagi had the good grace to look abashed and meekly began to nibble 
  again, her eyes bright with questions.

   "I see..." Ami began again and her voice was strangely gurgling.
  "Danger from the outside moving  towards the inside.
  I see a great pit and darkness." 
   
   Usagi was alarmed and she looked about as saw her emotions 
  reflected on the other girls faces.
   
   Ami began to sway gently now and Usagi could swear she could hear 
  drums. 
   
   Perhaps somehow Ami had actually become possessed?
    Perhaps it was a real warning? 
    
   Usagi glanced worridly over at Naru. Since the Crisis with the Black 
  Moon Family she was certain Naru knew she was Sailor Moon but they had 
  never talked about it. Actually Usagi had felt closer to Naru after 
  that because she felt she didn't have to tiptoe about so much. She  
  had resolved to talk to the other girl about it but now she might not 
  have the chance.           

   "Doom." Ami said, and her eyes seemed to have an unfocused
  quality and Usagi gobbled down the last the last of her cake.
  
   Her hand hovered over her broach  '-just in case.'

   "I see name Usagi, a name. It is that which spells your doom."
  
   "What? Who?" Usagi blurted forgetting the cautions to silence a few 
  seconds earlier."

   "....itte"  Ami's voice was a whisper.
    
   "What?" Usagi strained her ears but again caught only the end of 
  the name.

   "....itte" 
   
  "I don't understand." Usagi said her voice almost a shout. She 
  clutched convulsively on the bag of popcorn she had let sit in her lap 
  like a pillow.

   Ami looked at her then and gestured for her to come closer.
  
   Usagi did so, and Ami whispered the name in her ear.
 
   "WHAT?" She yelled.
 
   Ami and the other girls collapsed with laughter.
 
   Ami had only just managed to utter the fatal name "Celulitte" before
  becoming overcome with giggles.
 
   "I AM NOT FAT!" Usagi protested and Rei tumbled into the room 
  laughing and clutching at her portable stereo which had been playing a 
  tape of drums.
                                                                   

                        ***
                         
   After this Usagi had to be mollified. (Rei and Makoto had dragged her
  to the kitchen where they had made her a special parfait to celebrate her
  "non--fatness".
    
   The coolers and wine were broken out along with some less 
  "spiritual" beverages and after a few sips Ami was 
  pleasantly surprised by the fruity taste and the mild "zing."
  
   Ami changed out of Rei's old dressing-gown and the gold ring of 
  the turban took it's rightful place as the towel-holder next to the 
  shower.
  The rest of the girls changed into whatever sleepwear they had 
  brought and Ami slipped into the fuzzy flannel sleepers and left 
  the nightgown where it was.
  She slipped down the hall and opened the door of Rei's room a 
  crack to be rewarded with the unusual sound of two cats snoring.    
  Closing the door carefully she made her way back.
 
   After the girls had changed and settled down Makoto and Rei 
  returned from the kitchen with large bowls full of popcorn.
  To prevent any more spills Usagi was presented with a bowl all 
  for her self.                       
   Naru and Minako had brought over several movies and the girls 
  had a large choice of what to put in the VCR.
  
   Because of Minako's cinematic connections they were able to 
  watch a pre-release copy of the newest anime in the SailorV series: 
  SVIV: Friends and Enemies which was designed to add new life into 
  the stupidly popular SailorV series.
  
   To the other girls surprise and delight it added a new character 
  to the SailorV roster - SailorMoon.
   
   Somehow the very idea of watching this seemed like a parody to 
  Ami as she not-so-covertly watched the reactions of her friends. It 
  was almost as much fun watching them trying not to say anything 
  incriminating in Naru's presence as it was to watch the video.
  - Perhaps more fun considering the character design for 
  SailorMercury.
  
                          ****
                                 
   "Let me aide you." SailorMoon cried as she joined SailorV on the 
  monster-filled streets.
   "I have seen that I was wrong. The Dark Prince led me astray 
  from the true path."
  
   "Do you?" SailorV's voice rang with challenge and her eyes behind 
  her mask flashed like steel.
  
   SailorMoon sank to her knees, her head bowed.
    
   "I was...I was so wrong." she whispered and a single silver tear
  rolled from her eye. The thin gauze of her mask could not hide the 
  sadness in that emerald orb.
  
  "Then I call you friend." Said SailorV graciously offering a hand 
  to help her to unsteady feet.
   "Join my warriors for we have a world to save."
   
   "SailorV!" Shouted the leggy redhead SailorMercury.
   "My long-range scanners are picking up more enemy fighters."
  
   SailorV nodded.
   She knew from previous experience that the metal-clad battle-cyborg
   SailorMercury was seldom wrong.

   SailorJupiter brought her electro-axe into existence, called
  from the Void.  

   "Then shall we dance?" The plucky leader said and   
   her smile was a thing of cold beauty.

                              ***

   As the final credits rolled the girls continued to giggle.
   
   "What's wrong with it?" Minako protested.
   
   "Sailor Jupiter Super-Lightning-Storm Kick!" Naru exclaimed and began 
  to laugh again.
   
   "It's supposed to be a tie-in with the new video game!" was the 
  staunch defense, then Mina seemed to suddenly realize what she was 
  defending and began to laugh herself.
  "I give in." She giggled."It's crap, I'll admit it."

   Another tape of one of Mina's "test films" was put in.
   The girls watched a man in a big bug suit ran amok in Tokyo
   as he ate subway cars like burritos.
  This film was mainly ignored as the topic of conversation was 
  whether Makoto should henna her hair.
  
   Sitting around the conversation finally slid to something Ami was 
  dreading -boys.
   Ami was grilled about Uwara and his latest letters to her and she 
  side-stepped the issue by declaring hotly that she had always 
  hated love letters.
   Suddenly both Ami and Naru found themselves defending Umino. 
 
   "He's not a geek!" Naru protested. 
  
   "Just because someone is smarter (or even looks smarter)" Ami 
 reminded Rei. "Does not mean that they are any less passionate."
  
   Naru nodded and then blushed as the girls looked at her.
 
   "Oh?" Minako giggled and in the process turned the attention, 
  throwing the ball back in Ami's court. 
   "And we all know from letters from a certain someone that
  Ami is speaking from experience right?"
  
   Before Ami could heatedly protest Mina continued. "Speaking of 
  that particular experience when are you planning on re-introducing 
  Uwara-kun into your life a bit more...or have you?"
 
   "Umm." it was Ami's turn to blush.
 
   Naru, now feeling more in control by being granted a respite deftly 
  spoke up.  She didn't know this Uwara person but everyone had the 
  right to a few secrets. 
  (And besides, she could always ask Ami later.)
  
   "It's his eyes." She said suddenly, drawing attention back to her.
  
   "What?" Rei asked, confused.
  
   "Umino's eyes."  She answered.
   
   "I don't understand." Makoto said, puzzled. "How can you see his eyes
   behind those coke-bottle glasses of his?"
   
   "You can't." Naru answered.
  
   Ami was starting to get the idea of what the other girl was saying. 
   "But," She said hesitantly. "When he takes them off."

   "When *I* take them off." Naru said stressing the pronoun. She 
  sighed.  
  
   The rest of the girls suddenly understood and slowly nodded.
  
   "So why doesn't he get contacts?" The perplexed Makoto asked.
  
   "I think I know." Said Usagi.
  They looked over to the the girl who dreamily hugged the stuffed 
  penguin, the hair from her long blond tresses appearing like the 
  arms of an overly amorous octopus.
 
   She grinned. "It's so only you can see 'em. Right?
   
   She looked in askance at her friend, her blue eyes filled with 
  their own romantic thoughts.
  
   Naru nodded. This time the redhead's flush was quite evident.
  
   She giggled.
   
   The girls decided that they would plan a make-over for Umino. 
  Naru was a little hesitant at first but agreed after Makoto promised 
  to give him cooking lessons in anything other than spiced prawns.
  - Not that they were bad Naru argued, it was just that a little 
  variety never hurt.
 
   Somebody, (Ami was tired and forgot exactly who) suggested an 
  impromptu ear-piercing session and been unanimously turned down.
  
  "Great." Rei had snorted. "Like Usagi needs another hole in her 
  head...or were one of you about to trust her with a sharp object?" 
  
   Usagi, giggling from the lethal combination of lack of sleep, 
  alcohol and to much sugar belched rudely (and loudly) at her 
  friend. 
   Rei in retaliation began to barrage the other girl with an 
  assortment of the small pillows which were carelessly stacked nearby.   
  Ami had suspected that the other girl had brought these particular 
  objects in for just this reason and was happy to be proved right.
   
  Thus it came to pass, a line was drawn in the sand and that the 
  Princess-apparent found herself betrayed by her subjects.
  Although both sides in the fight became evenly matched over time 
  Usagi still had the odd pillow flung at her by her noble defenders.
  She also noticed the odd look which Naru had given Usagi as the 
  blond girl pummeled her dark-haired rival with the cry: 
  "I WILL punish you!" 
  
   Perhaps it was just lack of sleep and simply her imagination.
   
   Finally Rei graciously surrendered -or rather gave in do to the 
  fact she (and everyone else) was out of breath.
  It was about this time that the girls noticed that the sun was
  about to make it's arrival and the sky was tinged with pink.
   
   Makoto suggested they sit up and watch the sunrise from the porch 
  of the  house 
   "it was sorta romantic."
   - but began to yawn fiercely right after her words.
  Minako and Naru had urged "just another movie" on the 
  group but they decided to save them for the following evening.

   As Ami lay in her sleeping bag she slowly drifted off.
  Her eyelids felt oh-so heavy and she let them close. She 
  groggily decided that this was what friendship was about -not letting 
  things matter even if they seemed at first to be insurmountable.
  Maybe with friendship nothing at all really mattered in the long 
  run except for that friendship -that togetherness.
  She thought she heard the soft rustle of the sea whispering it's 
  way into her ears but realized that it was something else - the 
  lulling soft whispers of Rei and Usagi as they happily bickered 
  themselves into unconsciousness.
   
   She felt her lips pull up in a smile at this and thought of all 
  the people who loved her, her friends, her father, her mother....
  
  "Maybe Urawa?" Her inner voice asked and she slept.
   
   She was to tired to blush.
  


  _______________________________________________________________________
     Nene   Nene    Nene    Nene    Nene    Nene    Nene    Nene    Nene   
                    I met a Lady in the Meads,
                    Full beautiful, a faery's child,
                    Her hair was long, her foot was light
                    And her eyes were wild.
                                            J.Keats
   _______________________________________________________________________    
           Agent Of Chaos. Robyn, Duke of Amber. Unicorn Knight
  **************************************************************************