On Fri, 11 Sep 1998, Always Man wrote:

_Magic_ was tedious and ultimately worthless. Lawson needed to work out 
his Next Generation fascination, and he's never re-visited the series 
since. Once the novelty of creating your own Ranma cast wears off, you 
get bored and give it up. Lawson is just one in many who have went 
through this stage.

"Have went" is grammatically abnormal.  Try "have gone" or just "went."

psychology lessons. Mikanma and Khu Lon is cardboard and everyone else 
are practically non-persons. And they're all college students taking,    

"Everyone else" is considered a single entity.  Thus, "are" is
gramatically abnormal.  Try "is" instead of "are."  You could also change
"everyone else" to "the others."

Consider this proper C&C for your story (as these are all you post, it can
be assumed these are what you may consider "fan fiction," as you claim to
be a fan, and you are writing opinion as opposed to fact, thus rendering
your posts in a state of non-fact, or fiction).

--Matt (the technician)

---------------------------------------------------------------------
"..."  --James LaBrie, "Hell's Kitchen"
---------------------------------------------------------------------