Subject: Re: [FFML] [ffml] Akane-chan Change chapter 3, 1st draft
From: "Philip Hacker" <prohackr@hotmail.com>
Date: 9/10/1998, 6:49 PM
To: Trakal@map.com, fanfic@fanfic.com


'Lucky, he says,' thought Ranma. 'The only luck I'll have is if I can 
get
away from this house full of weirdos.' 

"Bye!" Nabiki called as she sprinted out the door.

"Wait up!" Akane called as she ran down the stairs, grabbed her 
shoes,
and ran out the door, followed closely by Futaba.

Some apparent, though I could be mistaken, continuity problems here.
1. Futaba was ahead of Akane and while it said Akane ran down the 
stairs it doesn't actually mention that she passed Futaba.

Futaba was first to the bottom of the stairs, but did not head directly 
for the door as Akane did.

2. Wouldn't Akane's shoes be outside? Japanese people, from what I 
understand, take off their shoes before coming into the house. However, 
I am just starting to read this, so I digress that it mght have rained 
the 
night before and that the shoes may have been brought inside in order 
to keep them dry.

If you will look at any shot of the Tendou's front door in either the 
anime or the manga, it shows that the Tendous keep their shoes just 
inside the door.


"He?" Realization dawned on the doctor. "Oh, I see."
This seems a little vague. Does the good doctor know about Jusenkyo 
or does he think Ranma's going through the early stages of a sex change 
operation? 

Actually, Tofu knows about Akane and her family changing, so he is 
jumping to the conclusion that Ranma is a relative.


Ranma-chan followed, pausing just long enough to use the hot water to
change back to male once she was out of the doctor's sight before
continuing. He really didn't have time to explain the curse to the 
doctor.

If the doctor did know about Jusenkyo, why would Ranma need 
to explain it, or was Ranma too preoccupied to notice the look of
realization on Tofu's face a moment ago?

"Well, you see, this is Ranma Saotome. He's staying with us, and we
sorta need you to make the usual, um...arrangements."

"Ah. Say no more. One double registration comin' right up."
A double registration?! Does Principal Kuno know of Ranma's 
curse already? I don't recall any mention of him having seen 
Ranma change, although that is a possible explaination.

Note that the principal also knows about the Shimeru condition, and that 
he, like the doctor, is assuming from Akane's implications that Ranma is 
one of them.


Phil

prohackr@hotmail.com


______________________________________________________
Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com