Disclaimer: Characters and situations belong to Rumiko Takahashi

"An Exercise in Manipulation"

By: Matthew Campbell


	No, I won't sit down.  It's my house and I'll pace if I want 
to pace.  Where do you get off...
	I'm sorry.  That was rude and rudeness never gets you 
anywhere.  Funny, my sister tried to teach me that for years, but it 
never really sank in until after I left home.
	Here, have some tea.  Comfortable?  Good.  I suppose 
you're wondering what this is all about.  You've been pretty patient 
with me these last few days.  See, I need to ask you a question.  It's 
a question I've been trying to answer for a long time now.  That 's 
why you had to know about my sisters, Akane and Kasumi.  That's 
why you needed to know about Ranma Saotome and all the trouble 
he brought to our house.
	What?  No, no you're right.  We don't know each other all 
that well.  You aren't the first person I explained all this too.  There 
have been a few other people.  I just...  I really need an answer.  I 
have to find someone who can tell me!
	I'm fine, I'm fine.  Thank you.  Please, sit back down.  
Now let's see, I think I managed to finish telling you about the 
wedding last time.
	Hmmmm?  Did I know what would happen?  Well, I knew 
they would interfere somehow.  I didn't really think things would 
get so far out of control, though.  Who could have figured they 
would start throwing bombs around?  That's the sort of thing I 
would have expected from Happosai, and I didn't figure he'd care if 
Ranma and Akane got married.
	Actually, that sort of plays into the last part of the story.  
You see, the day after the wedding, I payed a little visit to Ukyou 
Kuonji.  No, she was the cook, not the gymnast!  Pay attention.
	Why did I do it?  I don't know, curiosity I guess.  Besides, 
I figured maybe I could squeeze a little food or money out of her.  
Kuonji was obsessed, and all obsessed people are easy remarks if 
you play to their obsession.  That's an important tip, remember it.  
Anyway, I went over to Ranma's restaurant, and I brought up the 
subject of Ranma Saotome.  Whoa.
	She went straight into fantasy mode.  She spun this 
elaborate story about how now that Ranma had been rescued from 
a forced wedding, he'd be free to marry her.  I suppose it wasn't 
anything new to me.  Lots of reality impaired people in the 
neighborhood I grew up in.  Somehow, though, a part of it got to 
me this time.
	You see, I was listening to her talk about Ranma, and all 
of a sudden, I wondered who she was talking about.  The guy she 
was describing didn't bear much of a resemblance to any Ranma 
Saotome I ever knew.  So I told her so.  Of course, she told me I 
didn't know what I was talking about, and naturally I couldn't let 
that pass.  We ended up arguing for about nine or ten hours.
	No, I didn't misspeak.  I don't know why Ukyou didn't just 
throw me out, but she didn't.  She just kept yelling at me, all that 
time.  I'm not in the business of stripping away people's delusions, 
you understand.  It's a lot easier to play off them.  This was 
different, though.  This was, well, a battle of sorts, and I hate to 
lose any kind of fight.  I guess I've got a little Akane in me.
	Over those hours I broke down every illusion Ukyou 
suffered about Ranma.  At least, I tried, and I think I made a good 
job of it.  I told her about the Ranma I knew, and what I thought 
was really important to him.  She put up a good fight, I'll give her 
that.  Ukyou didn't break until I told her that Ranma and Akane 
loved each other.
	No, she hadn't realized it until then.  Oh sure, it was easy 
for you.  I told you the whole story, all at once.  You got an 
outsider' perspective.  She was living it.  So I told Ukyou that 
Ranma loved Akane, and she just sort of broke down crying.
	I'm not heartless, you know.  I don't get any especial thrill 
out of making people cry.  That's why I just didn't duck out then 
and there.  No, I stayed and tried to make sure she was all right.  
I'm not really a bad person.  I'm not!
	The whole time, Ukyou just kept muttering one thing, 
over and over.  At first I couldn't make it out, but finally I managed.  
She was muttering, "He's going to marry her."  She just kept saying 
it over and over.
	That's when something weird happened.  I was just 
standing there, listening to her and wondering what to do, when 
suddenly it occurred to me.  She was right.  Ranma was going to 
marry Akane.  Sure I'd managed to stop it once, but eventually 
they'd work out their differences and it would happen for real.
	Caught that, didn't you?  I hadn't really realized, not before 
that moment, why I had done what I'd done.  Sending out the 
invitations, inviting people who I knew would want to stop the 
wedding...  At the time, it just seemed like the thing to do.
	Let me tell you something I haven't told you before.  
Something not even Akane knew.  I don't like Ranma.  I've never 
liked Ranma, not since the day I met him.  Maybe it's his arrogance, 
the way he always seems to think he's better than anyone else.  He 
seems to think being good at martial arts means the world owes him 
something.  Maybe it's the way he doesn't ever know what anyone 
else is thinking or feeling.  It isn't that he ignores what people feel, I 
could respect that, it's that he's never even aware of it in the first 
place.  Ranma is one of the most self-centered people I've ever met.
	Biased?  Yes, of course I'm biased.  I don't like the man.  
That's fine though.  I'm pretty sure he's never liked me, either.
	Hate?  No, no, I certainly do not and never have hated 
Ranma.  I don't think I've ever really hated anyone.  Mostly, I just 
tried to make sure he stayed out of my way.  When he had 
something I wanted, I took it from him.  When he crossed me...  
well maybe I was a bit harder on him than I would have been on 
anyone else.  He had to learn, after all!
	Of course, I hadn't ever really thought it out until that day 
with Ukyou.  It hit me all at once then, and quite frankly, the 
thought of being related to Ranma repelled me.  Sure he could be a 
useful tool sometimes, but he wasn't somebody I wanted my sister 
marrying.  I imagined my nieces and nephews- with Ranma as their 
father.  I imagined having to put up with him at every family 
gathering.  I imagined having to point at him and admit to people, 
"Yes, that's my brother-in-law."  I imagined all that, and I looked at 
Ukyou, crying on the counter.
	She still wanted him.  Even after everything I had told her, 
even after finding out he loved another woman, she still wanted 
him.  I looked, and the decision seemed so simple.  I didn't want 
Ranma to be a part of my family.  Ukyou did want him.  Simple.  I'd 
just find a way to make Ranma stop loving Akane and get him to 
start loving Ukyou.  Simple.
	I didn't have any doubts that I could do it.  After all, 
wasn't I the great Nabiki Tendo?  Couldn't I manipulate anyone into 
doing anything?
	You laugh, and I suppose you should.  It was arrogant of 
me to suppose that I could just control people's hearts.  Those 
wiser and smarter than me have tried and failed.  But you know, 
I've never lacked confidence, and well... just listen.
	I figured the first thing to do was to take care of things on 
Ukyou's end.  She was vulnerable and it was easy to get her to take 
my suggestions.  All I had to do was suggest that I could get her 
closer to Ranma, and she was willing to do whatever I said.  I didn't 
even have to make any promises.  Pathetic.  I couldn't believe I ever 
admired that woman for her independence.  Find the right place to 
push, and she fell into place like anyone else.
	No I didn't charge her.  Don't act so surprised.  It wasn't 
altruism, it was just that I thought Ukyou would be easier to 
manipulate if she didn't think I had anything to gain.  I like money, 
sure.  Everyone does.  I like the things it can buy, too, and I knew 
giving up the bit I could get from Ukyou might help "buy" Ranma a 
ticket right out of my family.  Hey, come on.  Smile when I make a 
joke.
	So then, I had to go after the really hard part.  Ranma and 
Akane.  I-  What did I tell Ukyou, you ask?  Oh you know, pretty 
obvious really.  Fine, if you insist.  I told her to stop pushing the 
fiancee angle so hard and just talk to the guy once in a while.  I told 
her she should try to do things with Ranma without calling them 
dates.  I told her to tone down her enthusiasm a little.  I told her to 
listen to what Ranma said and try to find some common interests, 
instead of just assuming he was interested in what ever she was.
	Yes, I know that isn't exactly a recipe for Love Potion 
Number 9.  Believe me, it was an improvement over the way she 
had been handling things.  Now will you quit interrupting so I can 
get on with the story?
	Ranma and Akane.  I don't think I've ever seen two people 
more closely bound together.  I wasn't there myself, but I heard 
what he did on Mt. Phoenix, how he saved my sister.  They still 
wouldn't admit it, but I could tell.  Love.  Heh.
	So what, though?  What makes love so great anyway?  
Don't believe what you read in all those manga.  Love doesn't give 
you a roof over the head or put food on the table.  Love doesn't 
change someone who learned his parenting skills from Genma 
Saotome.    Father was a fool;_I had to be the one responsible for 
making sure my sister didn't make the wrong marriage.  Akane 
could do better!  I knew she could do better!  It wasn't...  It was...
	Fine, maybe that was an excuse.  Maybe I didn't care how 
the two of them felt.  Maybe I just didn't want Ranma in the family. 
So since when is looking out for yourself such a crime?
	So anyway, I set to work on the two of them.  Build slow, 
that's the key to things like this.  Just a few remarks here and there.  
Inflame the arguments between them, and divert them when they 
tried to make up.
	I got to Akane through her greed.  What greed, you ask?  
Don't play dumb.  Everyone has a price.  Everyone.  Akane's was 
simple.  I bet you could guess.  Go on, guess!
	No, not her cooking!   Idiot.  I... Sorry, sorry!  Don't go.  
Just let me tell you the rest of the story, OK?
	It was the dojo.  Akane wanted it, you know.  She did.  So 
I started whispering in her ear.  I reminded her how Ranma would 
inherit the School.  How he would be in charge of instruction and 
students.  I asked her if she planned to just have babies and leave all 
the martial arts to her big strong husband.  She nearly hit me for 
that one.
	Still, it made her think.  I whispered some more, just 
dropping a few casual remarks, like it wasn't anything important.  I 
reminded her how she and Ranma could always make their own 
arrangements later.  I told her how much better it would be if the 
dojo wasn't handed to him as some sort of marriage gift.  How he 
would appreciate it more.
	What did he know about running a dojo, anyway?  Ranma 
had spent his life on the road.  So what if Ranma was better?  He'd 
benefit from Akane's supervision.  Akane had the teaching touch.  
Everyone would be better off if she were in charge.  But that 
couldn't happen as long as the marriage agreement gave the dojo to 
Ranma.
	At least, that's what I told her.  It took a while, but Akane 
started listening to me.  She started wondering....
	Ranma, he was a different story.  He had his price too.  
Other than my sister, martial arts were the only thing he really cared 
about.  So I started asking him questions.  He suspicious at first, 
yeah, but Ranma has always had a big ego.  He actually thought I 
cared about his stupid art.  Before long, he was giving me these 
tedious, boring lectures.  So then I ask him a question.
	I asked him if he thought all those years on the road had 
helped him get better.  He said, of course.  So I said it was a shame.  
It was a shame he'd be stuck in one place, married at such a young 
age.  Sure he wouldn't be the best anymore, but that isn't any big 
deal, is it Ranma?
	It wasn't as easy as with Akane.  And Akane was not easy.  
Mentioning Ryouga wasn't enough, that only seemed to make 
Ranma more jealous for Akane.  No, I had to go on a bit about how 
wonderful Pantyhose Tarou was before Ranma really started 
foaming at the mouth.
	I'd been working on him from the other direction, too.  
Ranma has always hated to be forced into anything, you know.  
Hated it.  I think the fact he'd been forced into his engagement with 
Akane caused about ninety percent of their problems.  I just played 
that a bit, reminded him how he had no control over his own life.  
Before long, Ranma was cursing his father every morning and every 
night.  Poor Mr. Saotome.  I don't think he ever figured where all 
that hostility was coming from.
	There was one major problem left to take care of.  I-
	What?
	What was that?
	So you think I'm a genius, eh?  A genius.  Let me let you 
in on a little secret, kid.  It shouldn't have worked.  No way.  Not in 
a million years.  Never.  I'm not that good.  Making people fall in 
and out of love, nobody can do that.  If you had seen the way the 
two of them used to look at each other....  who could ever have 
come between that?
	Somehow though.... somehow I said just the right things.  
I found just the right points to hit, just the right jabs to make.  I've 
always been lucky that way.  Lucky.
	There was still family honor, though.  That's what had kept 
them together through it all, even in the early hard times.  Both 
Ranma and Akane knew that neither could break the engagement 
even if they wanted to.  Honor.
	So I went to talk to Nodoka.  Sorry, I mean Mrs. 
Saotome.  She and I grew rather familiar with each other, you see.  
I told her some stories about my family.
	You're catching on kid.  Were the stories true?  Well, they 
weren't anything that anyone could _prove_ was false.  Just a lot of 
little things, small dishonors.  I never talked about anything that 
would have been recorded in any records.  That's the way to play it, 
kid.  Never get caught.
	In a way, small things were even better for my purposes.  
Nodoka could have forgiven us one large stain on the Tendo honor.  
Any family can produce a bad apple, after all.  My little make-
believe history was different.  I built it up to show a pattern.  A 
pattern of a family Mrs. Saotome wouldn't want her son to join.
	So she started looking for an excuse, and no surprise, she 
found one.  I don't remember, exactly.  Something about father and 
Mr. Saotome not having formalized it properly in writing.  
Something like that.  Of course, Mr. Saotome didn't like it, but he 
could never stand up to Nodoka.  Not with that katana she carries 
around.
	That Nodoka.... she's crazy, you know that?
	They broke the engagement.  Because I'd been working on 
Ranma and Akane, because I'd been reassuring them they could get 
together on their own, neither protested strong enough to stop it.
	The Saotomes left our home, and I was happy.  It was nice 
and peaceful, like it had been before.  The house was ours again, 
not theirs.
	I didn't do much, after that.  Kept Akane distracted, made 
sure she didn't see too much of Ranma.  He had to transfer schools 
when they moved, so it wasn't that hard.  Oh, she still saw him a 
few times, of course.  They wouldn't give up that easily.  But I was 
waiting when he came to see her, and it was easy to help pick an 
argument, to make sure they had a miserable time.  Easy.
	Somehow, Nodoka heard Kuonji's story.  Guess what little 
bird told her?  Heh-heh.
	She never quite warmed up to Ukyou the way she did to 
Akane.  I don't think she approved of Kuonji's crossdressing.  Still, 
she acknowledged the engagement.  That was enough.
	So Ranma and Ukyou sort of drifted together.  I stopped 
by her new place a couple of times, but Kuonji didn't make me feel 
very welcome.  Guess I was an unwanted reminder of Akane.
	Surprisingly, I did get an invitation to the wedding, a few 
years down the road.  I think... I only _think_, mind you, that 
maybe Ukyou suspects what I did.  She could be pretty sharp, 
about some things.
	Akane never did, though.  She never blamed anyone but 
herself.  Good for me, I guess.  She still runs the family dojo and 
takes  care of father.  Kasumi got a job and moved out.
	Now look, this is important.  I still see Ranma and Ukyou 
every few years.  Father and Genma managed to remain pretty good 
friends, in spite of it all, so I still get word.
	I admit right out that I've never quite seen the passion 
between them that there was between Ranma and Akane.  Still, they 
do seem happy enough together.  I mean, Ranma smiles when he 
looks at her and kisses her and all that.  They even have a kid.  I 
forget whether it's a boy or a girl.
	No, I don't know how they dealt with those Chinese 
weirdoes, or with Kodachi.  Wasn't my concern.  The only one of 
the old gang I keep in touch with these days is Tatewaki.
	Huh?  No, he's changed a lot.  Rather embarrassed about 
his high school days, to be honest.  I still have a few pictures of him 
in his samurai outfit, just in case I ever need something from him. 
	We're getting off the point.  What I wanted to ask you was 
this.  Was what I did wrong?
	Sure Akane was sad for a while, and sure she's never 
gotten married.  We're- she's still young, I mean.  I'm sure it will 
happen sooner or later.  Sure Ranma and Ukyou are maybe not 
quite as happy as Ranma and Akane would have been.  They _are_ 
happy, though!
	See?!  It would have been the same either way.  Two 
together, one out.  It would have been the same!
	I didn't use any love potions or blackmail anyone.  I didn't 
force anyone into anything.  I didn't do anything wrong, did I?  DID 
I!?
	Don't shake your head!  No, sit back down.  I need an 
answer, damn it.  Was what I did wrong!  WAS I WRONG!?
	Damn it, why won't someone tell me?
	I used to know.  Why... don't.. I know anymore.?
	Please, just someone tell me.
----------------------
Author's Note:
I wrote this for two reasons.  One, it was a response to every story 
where Nabiki wakes up one morning and decides to use her 
awesome powers to unite Akane and Ranma.  Because all of a 
sudden, she wants her sister to be happy.
The other reason.... Well, Nabiki asked you a question.  What do 
_you_ think her moral position is here?  She didn't really change the 
numbers.  Still two people reasonably happy and one person 
somewhat sad.  She didn't use magic or mind control.
So how would _you_ answer her question?