He stepped out of the gate and into the street beyond,
hearing from far away the sound of children laughing, little more
than a barest whisper.  The midday streets of Nerima were crowded
with people walking, their faces fixed in expressions joyful or
melancholy.  Ryoga had seen a lot of faces in his time, and to 
his experience, he had found that the great majority of people
looked sad, for the most part.

Clumsy. The last sentence, for example, would have been much more 
powerful if it were written like this: "Ryouga had seen a lot of 
faces--and most of them were sad." It would also be good place to 

insert 

one of his famous philosophical commentary.

Surprisingly, I agree with you.  A useful and specific piece of 
commentary, Gubs.  Did somewhere hot just freeze over?

    Ranma had won.  How did the words go again?  May the better
man win.

Ryouga is a harsh critic of himself, but he certainly doesn't put 
himself below Ranma; he's constantly pointing out Ranma's lack of 

shame, 

pride, earnestness, responsibility, and general manliness. 

Ryoga is referring specifically to the near-wedding of Ranma and Akane, 
and his decision in the end chapter of V38 to allow it to proceed.  
Ranma has 'won' Akane, from Ryoga's viewpoint.

The central theme of this story is desire; the nature of it, the
conflicts it causes in us, and the ends to which we will go to 
achieve it.  Make of that what you will.  ;)

It would work, as a premise, but what you've outlined has nothing to do 
with this fic. There was nothing Ryouga was trying achieve in this fic, 
no desire he wanted to fulfil, no lust he wanted to indulge in.

<snip abbreviated rewrite>

I had resolved not to respond to you or anything you say anymore, Gubby, 
or whatever you're calling yourself these days (why do you change your 
name so often anyway?  Could it be to get around all the people who I'm 
sure have killfiled you by now?  Or do you actually think people are 
fooled by your identity switches?), but I can't allow such a gross 
misrepresentation of what I have written to stand without a response.  

Desire is what I wrote about.  Perhaps you didn't pick up on the fact 
that Nabiki is not exactly Nabiki, but the framework for this story is 
as old as the New Testament, and has been used in everything from the 
worst B-grade Hollywood horror films to Goethe's "Faust".  

Ryoga is offered the achievement of all his mortal desires; the 
possesion of both Akane and Akari, the defeat of Ranma, and even the 
basest temptations of the flesh in the form of "Nabiki" herself.  He is 
offered physical desire at the price of spiritual damnation.  

He is asked, to put it bluntly, to sell his soul in return for all that 
he desires upon earth.  I generally do not state the purposes of what I 
write so explicitly, preferring to allow readers to form their own 
interpretation, to understand the layers that lie below the surface.  
But your statement that the theme of desire has nothing to do with what 
I wrote galls me to the point at which I feel I must make clear exactly 
why I feel desire was the most important concept to what I wrote.

Ciao,
-Alan Harnum



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