Jeffrey "OneShot" Wong

Dragonball Z: Explaining Dragonball Z


Everyone refers to the Japanese way of saying Goku's name, meaning familyname
first, Son Goku. Now, imagine they don't.....


(Two people are watching a DBZ movie. Boy is going to be spending the night at
Otaku's house. Otaku is trying to get Boy to like anime since he is the prime
candidate for becoming an otaku (ie: Plays video games, likes Taco Bell, and
likes Star Trek) The only thing the boy is familiar with Japanese culture is
that the family name comes first.)

Boy: Who's that?

Otaku: That's Gohan.

Boy: Gohan? 

Otaku: Yeah, he's Goku Son's son.

Boy: What?

Okatu: He's Goku Son's son.

Boy: You're confusing me. What's a sun sun?

Okatu: No. It's Son's son. Not like that in a sun that gives sunlight.

Boy: ..............

Okatu: Son is Goku's family name.

Boy: So that means that guy is Goku.

Okatu: No. That guy's Goku.

Boy: Then who's Son?

Otaku: Gohan.

Boy: Ugh, I'm getting head ache.

Otaku: It's pretty easy to remember the people, there's Goku, Gohan, Goten...

Boy: Who's Goten?

Otaku: Goku Son's other son.

Boy: Eh?

Otaku: He's Goku Son's other son.

Boy: He has two suns?

Otaku: Which son are you talking about? Sun or Son?

Boy: I dunno, you tell me.

Otaku: There's only one sun in that universe. Goku Son's sons is Gohan and
Goten.

Boy: B-but I thought you said there was only one sun.

Otaku: There is. 

Boy: Then who the hell is Goten?

Otaku: He's the second sun.

Boy: .................

Otaku: Now, there's Vegita.

Boy: I remember, it's where Goku comes from.....

Otaku: That too.

Boy: What?

Otaku: He's also a guy.

Boy: The planet changes into a guy? Is this a human version of Transformers?

Otaku: No. Vegita comes from Vegita.

Boy: So he must be the Vegita II

Otaku: Eh?

Boy: If you're born from Vegita, and you're named Vegita, then you should be
Vegita II.

Otaku: No. He's not born from Vegita. Vegita was born on Vegita.

Boy: Argh!!! You're confusing the hell outta me!

Otaku: How?

Boy: Goku Son's son.  Vegita from Vegita. Only one sun in that universe but
there's also Son's other son. Argh!!!

Otaku: Let's move on. You'll understand later.

Boy: Fine.

Otaku: That's Sheng Long.

Boy: From Street Fighter?

Otaku: No, he's the dragon.

Boy: As in Dragon Punch.

Otaku: No. The name of the dragon is Sheng Long.

Boy: Oh. I thought this was some kinda crossover movie. That would be cool.

Okatu: Anyway, moving on. That teenager boy with purple hair is Turnks.

Boy: What about the other Trunks?

Otaku: There's two Trunks.

Boy: Oh boy, here we go again.

Otaku: There's Trunks of this timeline, and Trunks from another timeline.

Boy: Which Trunks is which?

Otaku: They're both the real Trunks. They just come from different timelines.

Boy: Let's move on. I'm well beyond confused.

Otaku: Trunks is Vegita's son.

Boy: The planet?

Otaku: Um, yeah, he's from Vegita.

Boy: He was born from the planet Vegita.

Otaku: No. He was born because of Vegita.

Boy: Which Vegita?

Otaku: Vegita from Vegita.

Boy: Vegita II, right?

Otaku: No. There is no Vegita II.

Boy: But he has to be if there are two Vegitas.

Otaku: Vegita was born on Vegita, not from Vegita.

Boy: ..................

Otaku: There's also a few other characters that will show up in other version of
the series, like Pan.

Boy: Who's Pan?

Otaku: Actually, it should be 'What's Pan?' because Pan is bread.

Boy: So there's bread in this series.

Otaku: No. There's a person named Pan.

Boy: Okay, so what's pan again?

Otaku: Bread. And also Gohan's Son's daughter after he grows up.

Boy: Eh? What the hell is a Sun's daughter? Is it like Planet Vegita's child,
Vegita?

Otaku: What the hell are you talking about? It's Son's Daughter, not Sun's
Daugther. There is no one there called Sun.

Boy: But you said the world has two suns.

Otaku: No. It has one sun.

Boy: Then who the hell is Goten?

Otaku: Goku's Son's other son. There are three Sons.

Boy: Three?

Otaku: Yeah, Goku Son. Gohan Son. And Goten Son.

Boy: Godamnit! How many suns are there?

Otaku: There are three.

Boy: But you just said there was ONE SUN!

Otaku: Oh. Sun. Yes, there's one sun. There are, however, three Sons.

Boy: Argh!!!

Otaku: Now, back on track, Vegita's son is named Trunks.

Boy: The planet has a sun? How the hell can a planet have a sun?

Otaku: Wrong kinda son. It's not sun, it's son.

Boy: .................

Otaku: Vegita's son is Trunks.

Boy: Which Vegita, the planet or Vegita II?

Otaku: There is no Vegita II. There's only Vegita.

Boy: Which Vegita.

Otaku: I'm talking about Vegita. He's the one born on Vegita.

Boy: Argh!!! Lettme get this straight, Vegita, from Vegita, has a sun named
Trunks. How the hell does he have a sun?

Otaku: You know. He had sex with someone.

Boy: And from that someone, a SUN was born?

Otaku: It could've been a daughter.

Boy: ....................

Otaku: There are two Trunks.

Boy: The boy and the sun, right?

Otaku: Actually, they're both sons.

Boy: So there are two suns? But you said there's only one sun!!!

Otaku: No, there are three Sons.

Boy: Argh!!! What the hell kinda series is this?!?!?

Otaku: It's an action oriented one. Since you like action, I figured you would
like it.

Boy: It's confusing the hell outta me!!!

Otaku: What? What's confusing you?

Boy: Three suns when you say there's only one! Vegita from Vegita! Sun's sun!

Otaku: I think you're mistaking Son for Sun.

Boy: ....................

Otaku: All right, fine, let's forget about it. Let's watch something else....

Boy: Yeah, something less confusing....

Otaku: I only have Ranma 1/2 lying around. The other tapes I lent out to
friends.

Boy: What's Ranma 1/2?

Otaku: It's about a boy that turns into a girl.

Boy: A transvestite?

Otaku: Oh boy, this is gonna be a looooong night....

<End for now>



-OneShot
Jeffrey Keith Wong
Author of Ranma's girls, 
The least one can do, and
the 'just won't die' series.
http://www.li.net/~jeffwong/index.htm