Continuing the post... here's part 12 of Paradise Lost. The whole is
available at http://members.tripod.com/~AvatarHR/pl.html, if you can't
wait for tomorrow. ;p

What has gone before... Ex-wanderer and Evangelion pilot Ryoga Hibiki
just dueled his arch-rival, Ranma Saotome, for Akane's safety. After an
inconclusive result, he staggers home, Rei Ayanami in tow. With Gendo
Hibiki lost in parts unknown, it would be terrible if an Angel showed up
now...

---
Misato tapped her fingers on the side of the couch. It was late. VERY
late. AND on a school night to boot. Ryoga really should have made it
home earlier. MUCH earlier. Especially considering that he was out with
Rei. If she didn�t know better, she�d say that they were out on some
sort of date. Hell, she might NOT know better.

Clock... the clock read 11:45 PM. Fifteen minutes. If they weren�t back
by midnight, she�d call Futuyuski. HE would hit the ceiling, but at
least he could track down Rei. Presumably, she was with Ryoga. Also
presumably, she had the phone in her vest pocket. Misato shuddered at
the fleeting thought that Rei might not have her vest pocket handy...
No,
that didn�t bear thinking about.

She looked at the kitchen, saw Penpen waddle away from the
refrigerator. He had a beer... two beers. Once again Misato marveled at
how perfect a pet the warm-water penguin made. It hopped onto the
couch, made a sound that was something like "Wark!", and dropped one of
the beers on her leg. She grabbed it (COLD) and started drinking
immediately.

A scraping sound outside the door brought her around. That HAD to be
them... Misato jumped up, mashed the opening control for the door three
times before it responded. Outside... nobody. She risked a peek outside,

and saw Rei... and Ryoga... and he had his arm around her... and he
wasn�t
walking straight.

Immediately, she felt blood rushing to her face. DAMN! She knew it had
been a bad idea to let him drink around the house. Now here he was,
coming home plastered, making poor Rei drag him all the way home (and
of course she had just taken it, didn�t even call a cab, poor dear),
and now he was probably going to lose his dinner all over her
apartment�s floor too.

Rei pulled him the rest of the way to the apartment. He still had his
pack on, although he had the umbrella in the hand opposite Rei. He was
using the umbrella as a crutch... she saw Rei look at him, with an
expression that could have been worry.

Misato reached out, grabbed Ryoga by his lapel-analogues, and hauled
him inside the apartment. He didn�t quite get his arm disentangled from
Rei, she was tugged inside too, but Misato wasn�t looking at her. She
slammed Ryoga down on the couch and took a step back, hoping he
wouldn�t lose it then and there, prepared to go into full lecture
mode...

His face. It looked like he�d been run through a meat grinder, slowly.
Everything was red, both eyes black (and one shut!), his nose wasn�t
quite straight, the lips were puffy. She recoiled in horror, then
examined him more closely. The open eye was partially filmed... he
wasn�t
noticing much. Misato sniffed, but could detect NO alcohol on his
breath.

Rei came the rest of the way inside and sat down in the chair. "He had
a rough night." Misato glanced over, thought she saw a ghost of a smile
on Rei�s face... nah, not likely. That worried expression, not really
any
different from her ordinary mask...

"What happened to him?" She thought that slapping him might bring him
around, but reconsidered after thinking about what kind of damage that
she might do by mistake. Ah. There was another easy way to bring
somebody out of a stupor... Misato headed for the kitchen, picked a
mostly clean glass, and filled it with cold water. THIS should wake him
up.

When she returned, he was sitting up, slightly, but still dead to the
world. "Okay, Ryoga, wakey wakey..." His eye rolled, pointed toward the
glass. Focused on the glass. As she pitched the cup forward, he
exploded into motion, sliding out of the pack�s straps and onto the
floor. The water coursed onto his pack... she looked down, saw him
blinking furiously and shaking his head. And breathing REALLY heavily.
"Back with us?"

Rei chuckled. (Chuckled?) "Go get some more water... that�ll wake him
up."

"Not... funny, Rei." He pulled himself back onto the couch, tumbling his

pack to the floor. "Oog. Not... fun. I�m... okay, really." He nodded his

head vigorously. "Okay... I�m back."

Misato�s eyebrow twitched. "I don�t suppose that you�re coherent enough
to EXPLAIN what you were doing out so late?"

Ryoga looked her directly in the face, said, "Got hit... by a car?"

"Not likely, unless you were stupid enough to lie there and get hit by
a lot of them." That was a pretty feeble lie. "Go on, what happened?"

She glanced at Rei, using one of her patented Commander-of-doom looks,
and Rei said, "He got in a fight."

"With WHAT? An armored division?" Wait a second... Misato�s mind flashed

back to green and yellow energy on the television screen. "NO."

"Uh... I could use some aspirin... everything got stiff on the way
home..."

"Ryoga, was that YOU fighting in downtown today?"

She would swear that that was a guilty look, if his face wasn�t so
mangled. "Um... sorry?"
---
Paradise Lost, part 12
Fan Fiction by Andy Kent
All characters belong to Gainax or Rumiko Takahashi
---
Ryoga�s head throbbed. Man, but night air wasn�t good for aching
muscles. He really should have thought about that before taking a hot
bath... at least Ranma had been as bad off as he was. They had basically

carried each other here, and Rei had helped him up the last flight of
steps...

Hm... Ranma was going to have to get home, somehow. With any luck, he�d
be all right. Anybody who could take that kind of abuse deserved a
break. Not that he�d get one, when he got home. Akane, goddess though
she was, was never the forgiving sort.

Judging from the expression on Misato�s face, HE wasn�t about to get a
break either. "Exactly why did you decide to blow up all those police
cars?"

"It was an accident." Really, it had been. Whenever he fought Ranma,
usually the only thing to suffer was the local surroundings. "They
shouldn�t have pulled in the way like that."

"AND the news helicopter?"

Um... "That was him." Ranma had almost taken his head off with that
shot.
Kind of dirty, aiming upward like that.

"AND the lingerie store?"

"Um... that was me. Sorry." Somehow, he had to figure out how Ranma
avoided being hit like that. Ryoga couldn�t remember landing more than
one out of every twenty or so, maybe not even that...

"AND all those cars?"

Ryoga grew a sweatdrop. "Both of us, I think... it�s a little blurred."

"AND the blast crater?"

"Hey! I did that this morning, not during the fight."

Her eyebrow twitched, spasming. "SO, you want to share with us how you
managed to punch a hole in the Geofront�s armor?"

"I did? Wow..." She didn�t look too impressed with that. "Must have been

that last one... I hit him with the Perfect Shishi Hokodan at the same
time he hit me with the Hiryu Shoten Ha. Damn, but we�d never done THAT
before. Pretty stupid, huh?"

"Yeah, I�d say pretty stupid just about covers it." Misato slammed her
empty beer can on the arm of the couch. "Who do you think is going to
PAY for all of that?" Ryoga dithered for a second. "And why do you keep
saying "him" anyway? The only person that was seen running away was
some redhead. Where does she fit into all of this, anyway?"

An idea percolated through the bruised mass of Ryoga�s skull. Hm...
opportunity. He�d feel bad about pinning everything on Ranma, except
for the fact that it was all his fault anyway. It�d even be fun to
watch, probably. "Um... that�s just Ranma... don�t worry about her."

"Ranma?" Misato�s face did something strange... he couldn�t identify her

expression. "What are you talking about?"

"Ranma... well, she�s Ranma, you know? Ah, hell with it. Just send the
bill to Nabiki Tendo. She�ll cover it."

"Huh?" Ryoga fervently hoped that Misato would not choose this moment
to look over at Rei, who was about to fall out of her chair from
suppressing giggles.

"Yeah... she knows more about Ranma than me anyway..."

"Um... sure, whatever. Don�t think that you�re off the hook, though!"

Ryoga stood up... ah, both legs were working correctly now. "It�ll wait
for morning... I�ve got to go heal up first." He tottered off towards
his
room, finding it on the second try, and collapsed on the bed. Ah. Nice,
soft bed. There WERE advantages to living here.

---

Misato was up early... it frightened her that she could be so active on
only four hours of sleep... but she couldn�t sleep. Something kept
bugging her, eating at the back of her mind... Something about Ryoga�s
story. It wasn�t matching up.

She decided that the LEAST he owed her was a full explanation. She
walked over to his room... knocked a couple times. After all, it
wouldn�t
be POLITE to just barge in. She then proceeded to barge in.

He was lying, face up, on the bed. And healthy-looking. The bruises and
marks from yesterday had faded... completely. He was his normal self, if

a little rumpled. Really, you shouldn�t sleep in your clothes. Now to
wake him up... She tossed a shoe at his head. No response. No, wait...
he
was stirring. "Hey, Ryoga, wake up, you idiot."

"huh?" He blinked twice and levered himself up. "What are you doing,
Misato?"

"Something about yesterday. I thought you didn�t fight girls!"

"I don�t... g�way, lemme sleep." He rolled over.

"Then what was that Ranma girl doing in the crater in the FIRST place!"

"Uh?" He sat up straight. "Hey, would you cut it out? I said I�m sorry
already!" He flung himself back on his bed and threw the covers over
his body.

A banging came from the wall next door, followed by Asuka�s voice...
"Hold it down already! It�s six AM!"

Well, she knew how to take a hint. "Okay, alright already." She shut
the door behind him.

Asuka shuffled in from next door. "Wha..." Bleary... "Couldn�t you wait
a
few minutes? I was having a nice dream, you know..." Having said her
piece, she headed back for her bed.

Hm... Misato wandered into the kitchen, grabbed a beer. Sitting at the
kitchen table, she leaned her chair back and considered Ryoga�s
reaction. Obviously he had been fighting a girl. It must have been the
same girl as before... "Ranma", by all odds... and he was embarrassed
about
having fought her.

And she was GOOD. Misato knew that Ryoga could damage things with his...

ki, he�d called it. The carcass of the Fifth Angel attested to that.
And she was doing the same thing, or something pretty similar. Did the
color matter? Misato shook her head and followed that thought with a
gulp of beer. She didn�t know enough about it to answer that question...

Another question came to mind. If Ryoga�s ki attacks could hurt an
Angel, even through its AT field... hers probably could too. And if she
could hurt an Angel... she could hurt an Eva just as easily. No, more
easily.

This "Ranma"... she again shook her head at the name and wondered if the

world was intentionally twisted, or if it just seemed like that... she
could be a threat to NERV, one that humanity couldn�t afford. She
resolved to ask Kaji about it. The egotistical bastard would definitely
know what to do about this situation.

---

Ryoga waited until he heard the sound of Misato leaving for HQ, then
dragged himself out of bed. No point in hiding from her, but he�d best
let her cool off a little first. He stretched, still tight from the
previous night�s exertions, and changed his clothing. He was fine,
sure, but not nearly one hundred percent, not after a night spent
healing like that. No school today, he resolved.

The smell of... well, he couldn�t identify it, but it smelled like
food...
wafted in the hallway outside his room. He stopped to collect his pack
from the doorway before setting off in search of his breakfast. No
point in taking chances. After a minute of blundering into linen
closets and such, he finally managed to reach the next apartment, where
he saw a sleepy Asuka munching on something that looked very much like
a big cracker. She looked up and mumbled a greeting around a mouthful
of... whatever it was.

"And good morning to you, too." He slung his pack on the floor and sat
down. "Your turn to cook?"

"<mpgf> Yeah. Eat up, or we�ll be late."

He grinned. "You�ll be late, you mean. I�ve got a day off coming."

She flipped him one of the rectangular objects and chuckled. "Doesn�t
have anything to do with the fact that you beat up a girl yesterday,
does it?"

"HEY!" Ryoga bit into the thing a great deal harder than he had
intended. Sugary, hot, not really tasty, but it�d do. "As if YOU don�t
know what happened already."

"Of course I know." Asuka�s face shone with the certain knowledge of
her own superior intellect. "In fact..."

She was cut off by Rei�s entrance. "I told her what happened last
night."

The look on Asuka�s face... PRICELESS. Ryoga wished, not for the first
time, that he had a camera handy. She deflated like a burst balloon.
"Well, so, I figured it out anyway... So, what are you going to do about

it?"

"Ignore it and hope it goes away." He polished off the rest of the
wafer in two bites. "The LAST thing I want Misato looking into is my
personal life."

"She�ll look anyway... she strikes me as the nosy type." Asuka wiped a
crumb off of the table and looked up at him. "YOU are going to get it,
you know?"

"From what?" Rei didn�t move to eat one of the things, though she did
sit down.

"From NERV! The pilots that keep humanity safe from the Angels
shouldn�t be out brawling in the streets."

Ryoga stared at her, hoping to detect some sign of sarcasm... no,
nothing. The utter ludicrousness of the thought hit him, and he
laughed, almost choking. "Asuka... <wheeze> I�ve been... <cough>
brawling
for quite a time now, a HELL of a lot longer than I�ve been a pilot.
It�s kind of a habit."

Rei reached across the table and poked Ryoga�s forehead. Twice. "How
did..." She blinked, once. "You were bruised here last night. And
there..."
poking at his ribs, "And there..." at his shoulder. "Doesn�t that hurt?"

"Um... no. I heal fast too."

Asuka smirked. "Yes, it�s the amazing Ryoga, everybody. Takes a licking
and keeps on ticking!"

"It�s not like that!" He stretched a bit. Still some kinks to work
out...
"I just know how to heal up quickly. Something I learned way back when.
It�s not that important anyway."

"Can you show me how to do that?" Rei was looking at him... Ryoga
thought
that she had a different look, it was almost like she wasn�t looking at
all, but you knew that she was.

"Hey, hey, break it up, you two." Asuka interposed her bag between the
two. "Well, I�m headed to class. YOU can do whatever losers do on their
day off."

"Good." The insult didn�t hit Ryoga right away, and it wasn�t worth the
effort to get angry with her over it. "I�ve got some shopping to do."

"Shopping?" Asuka stopped and stared at him like he had just been
splashed with cold water. "What the hell would you go shopping for?"

"Um... I told Ranma that I�d help him look for an engagement ring
today."

She regarded him with a skeptical look. "And you two know something
about jewelry, then?"

"Um, no. What�s to know?"

"Obviously you�ll just hurt yourself if I leave you alone. Well, I�ll
just have to go with you and keep you from screwing up. Ready, Wonder
Girl? Or would you like breakfast first?"

Rei looked at the plate of wafers... her expression didn�t change, but
one eyebrow twitched up. "What are they?"

"Toaster tarts. I don�t like cooking in the morning."

"I�d rather not." Ryoga racked his brain, trying to recall if Rei had
ever referred to her preferences before. Didn�t find any specifics.

"Why not? They must be safe, Ryoga ate one." Asuka grabbed one and
shoved it at Rei.

"That�s what Misato said." Well, he was just trying to be helpful...
Asuka didn�t have to react like that. Her wrists and elbows bent to
ninety degrees in skew directions, and she leapt back like she�d been
burnt. "Well, she did... and Akane too."

This time, Rei took a step back. "I would really rather not, then."

---

"So, which way are we headed?" Asuka followed behind Rei, as they
walked towards some unknown destination... well, almost unknown. It had
to be in Nerima, what with the wholesale property damage.

"First, we pick up Ranma." Ryoga kept trying to head off to one side or
another, and Rei kept having to chivvy him back into line. "Then, I
dunno, we find a jewelry store."

---

Misato closed the door behind her. She still didn�t particularly want
to see Kaji, in fact she could never see him again and be just as
happy... but after yesterday, she couldn�t ignore the pig-tailed girl
any
longer. If she was as capable as Ryoga, and she had to have been to
beat him up like that, then she couldn�t be allowed to run around loose
or attack pilots.

As soon as she reached her chair, she heard a rap at the door. "Come
in."

The door opened, and Kaji sauntered in. She hated his stubble. Hated
his dressing. Hated his leather jacket. Especially hated the way he
seemed to light up whenever she was around. He slid into her visitor�s
chair, propped an elbow on the table and rested his head in his hand.
"Misato... you look GREAT in the morning. What happened?"

She hated that, too. "Cut the crap, Kaji. I�m not in the mood today."

"Ah, but what else can I do? You call me in here, don�t tell me what
you want, I have to assume SOMETHING. My heart soars." He sighed and
looked at the ceiling. "If it�s not THAT..."

The nerve! "THAT is something you�re not here to get."

His face in perfect poker set, he continued. "...then you must want me
to
do something else. What favor can I do for you?"

"Well..." She grabbed a video tape from the desk. Maya was wonderful,
they really didn�t deserve her; as soon as the news had cut to the
fight yesterday, she had slammed on the "record" button. "Did you see
what happened yesterday?"

"Not up close, but I saw a little of it from my car. It was great! I
haven�t seen a display of ki attacks like that since before the Second
Impact."

Misato glanced back at the tape, then did a double take. "What do you
mean, you�ve seen that kind of thing before?"

"It was WAY back, maybe twenty years ago... I was still doing my
�wandering� thing, you know, just floating for a while. One summer, I
guess it was �99, I was doing some cooking work at this little place..."

Misato let her head droop, then bent it ninety degrees. "Okay, I get
the point. Anyway, there was this little guy, older than dirt, he did
an eat and run. The boss sent me after him, since I was the only
martial artist handy..."

He swallowed. "I caught up with him a few miles outside of town. He�d
stopped, there was some kind of small army attacking him. He beat a few
of them down, they were all dressed in black, but pretty weak. Then,
they did something, I couldn�t see it, but he just jumped into the
middle of a pack of them. They started beating on him, and I went over
that way, thought I could get some licks of my own in... He exploded.
Literally, there was this great big BANG, and then I was flying. I
think I hit my head on a rock or something."

"Now isn�t THAT a pity."

"Hey, now, be nice... When I woke up, there were two of these guys with
the old man. One of them was short, bald, and pudgy... come to think of
it, he sounds a lot like your ex-husband."

She snorted. "You forgot greedy and lazy."

"Well, I was just making a joke... the other one was a nice fellow,
though. Came over, gave me something to kill the pain, bottle of sake I
think, and we talked for a while. What was his... Soun Tendo. That�s
right... he told me about what was going on. Said that it was some
special attack of... well, he just called the old coot "the Master". I
don�t remember a whole lot of it. Man, I hope he surv..." Kaji trailed
off and looked at her. "Sorry."

"Look, you can mention the Second Impact without me killing you. I just
don�t like to talk about it, that�s all." She tossed him the tape. "I�d
like you to watch that. See if you can figure out what�s going on."

"I can do that." He tucked the tape into his jacket. "I don�t want to
run into whoever was doing that, though."

"You already have. One of them was Ryoga-kun." She saw his face change,
all humor gone now. "Yeah, he admitted it. The other one was a girl,
red hair, ponytail, wearing black pants and a red shirt."

"That sounds familiar... could it be the same one that stepped on
Ritsuko
a while back?"

"I�m sure of it."

He whistled, low. "She�d asked me to find out who that was, but it�s no
good. There must be thousands of redheads in Tokyo-3. It�s unnatural, I
tell you..."

"Ryoga said that her name is Ranma. I don�t know if it�s true, he�s
obviously lying about some other things related to the fight, but it�s
a start."

She could tell that Kaji was tense, even though his face wasn�t showing
the reaction. "With a name, I can do something." He stood.

"And could you find out something about those... ki attacks? If we can
use them against the Angels... well, we have already, haven�t we?"

"Now, now... I�m not a master myself, I just swing a wooden stick around

to stay in shape, Misato. Hm... I can find Soun, though. He�s supposed
to
have had a dojo around here... give me two days at the database."

"They�re yours. Thanks, Kaji."

A rakish grin spread across his face. "You knew that I would agree...
ah,
the things that I do, to stay with such beauty."

"Do you EVER change?"

For a moment, something dark flashed across his expression... "Yes, of
course..." As he left, she heard his whisper. "I just hope that it�s
enough."

---

Ryoga jumped over the wall, shortly followed by Rei. Asuka, wondering
exactly how you could jump ten feet in the air and not hurt yourself on
landing, decided to play it safe and used the gate. She managed to
catch up with them just before they made it to the porch... where Ranma
was talking with some girl with brown hair and a sweater.

"C�mon, you KNOW I can�t afford twenty percent interest."

The unfamiliar girl spoke. "Of course not. But, then again, you can�t
afford the principal either, or you wouldn�t have come to me, now would
you?"

Ranma shuffled his feet. "Damn, Nabiki..."

Ryoga sat next to the other two. "Come on, Ranma, let�s go. Um...
where�s
Akane?"

"She went out for a run. Man, it�s great, with the school blasted,
we�ve got some time off. How�s life, P-chan?"

Nabiki blinked once at the remark, but Ryoga just smiled. "I feel
great. Hurry up, we need to go before Akane gets back..."

"And just WHY do you need to go somewhere?" Nabiki pointed a finger
straight up. "Ryoga, you know it�s not a good idea to tell me things
like that... now I�ll have to get Ranma to do something for me."

Ranma bopped Ryoga on the head, once, and Asuka thought that it hadn�t
been a serious hit. "Hey, stupid, I�m already in bad financial shape, I
can�t afford to tick her off like that."

"Quit whining, Ranma. I�ve already taken care of that. Let�s go."

Rei looked at Asuka. "What are they talking about?"

Hm... she�d feel really stupid saying "I don�t know" to Wonder Girl.
Asuka smiled, only partly in humor, and said, "Blackmail, obviously."

"What�s that?"

"Um..." How to put it in terms that Rei would understand... "When
somebody
has a secret, but you know the secret, sometimes you can make them give
you money so that you won�t tell the secret."

"Oh. Then why aren�t we blackmailing Ryoga? He�s got a secret."

Ranma chuckled. "Not much of a secret. I still don�t know WHY Akane
hasn�t figured it out."

"Figured what out?" Nabiki glanced back and forth between the four.
"Come on, tell me... what?"

Ryoga shot a glare at Nabiki that should have powdered the wall behind
her. "It�s NOTHING, OKAY?!"

"Right, right..."

"Anyway, let�s go."

Once again, Asuka was left to take the gate as the others vaulted the
wall. As she approached the group, now headed in what was presumably
the direction of a jewelry store, she asked, "How do you all do that?"

"Do what?" Ranma looked back at her.

She did a bouncing motion with her left hand. "You know, jump like
that."

"Oh. Um... I ALWAYS jump like that. Ryoga?"

"Well, I have to jump harder, that�s all."

Rei chuckled, which was strange in and of itself. "Ryoga just jumps.
Ranma, he tucks his legs a little, then snaps them back and upward. It
gives him four times the boost of a normal jump."

"How did you... never mind." Asuka paused, bent her own legs, and tried
the motion. After sailing an incredible three feet, she landed back on
the sidewalk. "Well, that was still a pretty good jump."

Ranma snorted, while Ryoga just wandered over to a crossing street. Rei
snagged him by the back of his headband and pointed him in the correct
direction, stifling a giggle.

---

Ranma hadn�t been to a mall in ages. In fact, he�d never been much for
malls, especially considering that he�d spent most of his life
wandering through the wilderness with his father, and even in Nerima he
couldn�t afford much more than food expenses.

This was a particularly nice mall, by his standards. Two floors, both
of them lined with stores. Shoe stores. Leather stores. Clothing
stores. Book stores. He paused before a sporting equipment store before
Ryoga popped him on the head to get moving.

For some reason, Ranma felt that he was in an incredibly good mood.
Here he was, getting married (married!) to Akane, walking along with
Ryoga without being attacked, with an enforced school vacation to boot.
It didn�t get much better than this, he thought.

They found a jewelry store, and the four walked inside. Under one of
the glass cases, he saw a really nice selection of rings. Lots of
rings. All sorts of rings... man, were there a lot of rings. Ranma
whistled, slowly, and started hunting through them.

He glanced up once, briefly, seeing a salesman coming his way. Ryoga
grunted, and flared his battle aura. (Dim green. Ryoga must be in a
good mood too... or at least not quite as depressed as normal.) The
salesman, fearing for his life, retreated to a corner and tried to
avoid eye contact.

Asuka bent over the case, pointed at one ring. "That one�s nice." It
WAS nice. Beyond nice. Perfect. It was a simple golden band, set with a
small stone. He didn�t know what KIND of stone it was, but it shone
with a deep, dark blue. The exact shade of Akane�s hair... Yes, it would

do nicely.

Ranma signaled to a different sales clerk. "I�d like that one... no, the

one next to that one, right... yeah, that�s it."

The clerk looked awfully familiar. High school age, brown hair,
longish... He couldn�t place her. "This one IS nice, isn�t it? And it�s
priced on sale, only eighty thousand yen."

Ranma picked his jaw up off the glass counter. "Eighty... th...
thousand!?"
That was WAY more money than he had. Way more than he�d EVER had. More
than... he emitted a strangling sound as Ryoga reached into his
headband.

"Yes, that�s correct. We have a variety of payment plans..." Ryoga
proceeded to pull several five-thousand yen bills from his headband,
stopping when he had produced sixteen of them. "But, of course, cash up
front is never refused."

Asuka kicked Ryoga�s ankle. "Hey, don�t forget the tax, stupid."

"Oh, yeah, right." Ryoga placed another two bills on the stack.

Wow. That... what the... where the hell did Ryoga get that kind of cash?

You�d think that �Clueless Man Robs Bank� would make the news. "Ryoga...

um... what�s that?"

Ryoga turned, thwapped Ranma�s head with one finger. "Ranma, you don�t
have much money, right?"

"Um, no... but..."

"And it�s my fault that you�re getting married right now, right?"

"Yeah, kinda... but..."

"So I�m helping out a bit." Ryoga scratched the back of his head.
"Besides, it�s for Akane anyway."

"Um..." Now THAT was generosity. "Th... thanks, Ryoga."

"Don�t mention it." Ryoga, seeing that Ranma�s shock hadn�t worn off,
finished purchasing the ring and gathered his change, tucking the
remainder into his headband. He held the ring up to his eye. "Nice. And
it�s her size, too."

"How do you know her ring size?"

Ryoga replaced the ring in its case and handed it back to him. "You
learn a lot about somebody when you sleep with them for a year... what?"

Ranma fell over onto the case, as did the sales lady. Asuka flashed
bright scarlet, and even Rei seemed shocked. Well, she blinked, anyway.

"Um... OH NOT LIKE THAT! You pervert." Ryoga hauled Ranma off the
counter
and out of the store, promptly turning into a service corridor before
the other two could catch up.

---

Yuka smiled. THAT had been a shock, having both Ranma and Ryoga wander
in... although she didn�t recall ever seeing the other two before.

"Is it safe to come out?" Hikaru popped his head over the counter,
glancing around.

"Yes, he�s gone, get up already." She had to admit, Hikaru looked
pretty good in a suit. With school on leave, while they fixed some of
the damage, it made sense to get a job, and this one was pretty good. A
nice commission on that sale.

She smiled to herself, again. Ranma probably hadn�t even recognized her
outside of a school uniform. And Ryoga didn�t know her at all, although
he himself was famous... well, infamous around the Furinkan campus.
There
was only ONE reason why Ranma would be buying a ring, though. He was
about to propose to somebody. And the color made it pretty clear who...
Yuka privately cheered. It was about time that Akane got a ring out of
her betrothal.

Now she just had to figure out what Ryoga had meant... it couldn�t be
what she had thought... could it? She blushed a bit, thinking of Ryoga�s

last statement.

Anyway, everybody would HAVE to hear about it. It just wasn�t fair,
keeping a secret like that.

---

Ryoga tapped his foot as he waited for Asuka. True, she had helped out,
finding the right ring and everything. Although he didn�t recall
himself dragging her along, exactly. But she didn�t have to try on
every dress in the store or anything. He leaned back on the bench,
looked over at Ranma. "So, are you happy?"

"Yeah, VERY happy. That�s one hell of a favor, Ryoga. I�ll pay you back
in no time, man."

Ryoga shuddered. "I�m not like... your sister-in-law, you know. It�s a
gift for Akane. Besides, what do I need the money for anyway?"

Ranma grinned. "Hey, thanks... come to think of it, where did you GET
that kind of money? Weddings are expensive."

Ryoga grunted his agreement. "You wouldn�t believe how good that
piloting thing pays. It�s incredible. I�ve got more money than I know
what to do with. I mean, that in there was my bonus for killing ONE
ANGEL. Just ONE!"

"Man, I�ve gotta get in on that. Sign me up!"

"Fat chance, Ranma. Besides, you�re better off... it�s NOT fun moving
one
of those around. And they make you do all sorts of tests all the time."

Rei nodded from his other side. "Yes, and you�ve never seen Misato
angry. She�s not pleasant to deal with, sometimes. And Ritsuko..." She
trailed off.

"Hey, you think she�s going to take all day, Ranma?" Ryoga adjusted the
straps on his pack.

"Women, huh?"

Rei asked, "What do you mean?"

Ryoga looked over at her. She had on her "curious" face, which looked a
lot like her normal face. Then again, she ALWAYS looked like her normal
face. "What does being a woman have to do with it?"

"Well, women like to shop a lot, right Ryoga?"

Well, inasmuch as Ryoga knew less than a dozen women well... "Yeah, I
think so."

"But I�m a woman."

Ranma squinted, said, "Yeah, think so."

"Take my word for it, Ranma." Ryoga blushed a little. Man, those plug
suits were TIGHT.

"But I�m not shopping."

"Well, you�re not normal, then, I guess." Ranma chuckled. "Not that I�m
one to talk... I don�t ever like shopping, even when I�m..."

Rei nodded. "So it�s not something physical?" That wasn�t quite her
"curious" face... a little bit of a frown... maybe her "worried" face.

"Cultural, maybe." Ryoga saw Asuka at the counter in the store, buying
a couple of items he couldn�t see too clearly. "Don�t worry about it."

Ranma chuckled. "I dunno. So far, you�ve been wearing your uniform
every time I�ve seen you, even at night. Don�t you have some other
clothes?"

"No, I don�t."

"Why not?"

She sat back, staring at the railing of the balcony on the second
floor. Ryoga saw her mouth the words, "why not", to herself.

Ryoga felt Ranma smack his shoulder. "Hey, Ryoga..." He had a look on
his
face, not quite worried, but still... "Who�s this Misato person you keep

referring to?"

"Well, she�s..."

Three stores down, a glass fa�ade exploded outwards, showering the
lower level with stray shards and various ladies� undergarments. A
small mote emerged from the cloud of pulverized fixture dust, resolving
into the image of Happosai. He had a cloth tied over his head, his
usual brown ninja suit, and a large cloth sack tucked over one
shoulder. He stopped, cackled madly for a moment, and then headed
towards Ryoga, his characteristic "What a haul!" making echoes through
the mall.

Immediately, Ryoga cleared the bench, cocking his umbrella under one
arm, preparing to lash out. Ranma went up, perching on the railing of
the second floor. Rei ducked behind a planter and reached under her
vest...

And Asuka walked out of the store. "What�s going on, guys..." She
glanced
right, then turned and flung herself out of the way. The manic Happosai
cleared them before they finished reacting, headed for the other side
of the mall.

"HEY! YOU OLD GEEZER!" Somebody else leapt from the second story,
landing directly in front of the pervert. Black hair, feminine looks,
earrings... had to be Pantyhose Tarou, Ryoga thought. He allowed himself

a moment to envy Tarou�s cool vest and bracers... Happosai pulled up,
stopped, and glared at the intruder.

"What�s the matter, Pantyhose? Don�t like your name?" Happosai jumped
in the other direction, doubling back on himself. Tarou roared in anger
and pursued. As he passed, he locked gazes with Ryoga for a second...
No,
he hadn�t forgotten anything, it seemed. The two retreated for the
mall�s other exit.

"Wha... was that..." Asuka squeaked as Ranma lightly hopped down from
his
perch. "That was that old pervert, from the dojo?"

"Yeah, and Tarou." Ranma was grimacing. "Damn, I didn�t know that he
was back in town. So much for a perfect day, huh, Ryoga?"

"You said it... though if he�s after Happosai, we won�t have to worry
about him for a while."

"And no bottle full of Jusenkyo water. Man, I�m glad I don�t have to go
through THAT again."

Rei stood up, adjusting her vest. "Go through what again?"

"Long story."

"I never heard that one." Ryoga checked the straps on his umbrella,
sniffed, noticed smoke pouring out of the ruined lingerie store. "You
know, we should probably go now."

Asuka nodded. "Good idea... how perverted can that guy be? I mean, he
even called the other guy pantyhose!"

Ranma fell over laughing, and Ryoga would have as well if Rei hadn�t
been right next to him. As it was, she was having trouble propping him
up... but it... funny funny... he couldn�t stop laughing.

"What�s so funny?" Asuka shifted both her shopping bags to her left
hand, and produced a small mallet in her right hand.

Ryoga barely noticed the impact. He managed to stop laughing his guts
out and settled for a quiet chuckle. "Um... it�s..." He couldn�t do it.
He
was laughing so hard that it was hurting...

Ranma pulled himself up the side of a fountain. Then, laughing, fell
over the side, which set Ryoga off even harder. Ranma emerged, female
and sputtering, and not laughing anymore. "That�s his NAME, Asuka."
Well, maybe still laughing, a little.

Asuka stared at the two of them, first in disbelief, and then with a
silly smile on her face. "You�re serious! Oh, man..." She started
laughing herself...

Rei, however, was not amused. "Um... Ryoga... you�re heavy. Get off."

"Oh, right. Sorry."

---

Gosunkugi kicked a rock as he walked home. Sure, his new job was great,
and Yuka was easy on the eyes, but he still wasn�t really happy. How
could he be? Saotome was in there, buying a ring, and Ryoga WASN�T
threatening to pound his face in for being unfaithful... which meant
that
the ring was for Akane, and that Gosunkugi himself had zero chance.

Not that he�d ever really had any chance. It was all just a lot of
wishful thinking, right? Akane, sure, she was beautiful, she was a gift
to mankind, but she wouldn�t ever have seen anything attractive in a
lurker in the shadows anyway. He rubbed his eyes, knowing that no
amount of sleep would ever erase the bags from under them, and sighed
to himself.

Of course, with his hands covering his eyes, there had been no way he
could have avoided running into that person, right? He picked himself
up off of the sidewalk and prepared to run for it... he didn�t harbor
any
illusions about his ability as a martial artist. At least his camera
bag didn�t get jostled too badly.

Looking at the other person, he felt a surge of adrenaline... it was
Mousse. Sure, he wasn�t the most deadly of fighters, not in those big
white robes, especially not with his severe myopia, but he was still
enough to flatten Gosunkugi to the ground five times over. Mousse
pushed his glasses from his forehead onto his nose and squinted. "Oh.
It�s you, Gosunkugi. Watch where you�re going, will you?"

"Sorry, Mousse... hey, you seem depressed." And he did. Mousse was
slumped over in his stance, his eyes were... well, masked behind white
frosted lenses, but his FACE sure looked droopy. "Shampoo again?"

"Yeah. Why doesn�t she understand that I love her? Is it something that
I�m doing wrong? Am I ugly? Am I stupid?"

Oh, Gosunkugi was tempted to give THAT a straight answer, but he wasn�t
in that good of a mood at the moment. "Here... I know something that
might cheer you up..."

"Yeah?" Mousse looked up with a hopeful expression.

"Yeah, listen to this. Guess who came into the shop today?"

"Um..."

"Never mind. It was Saotome."

Mousse clenched a fist. "How can he toy with poor Shampoo�s heart like
he does? It�s not right."

"Hey, but you�ll love this. He was buying a ring... for Akane."
Gosunkugi
bent over, his dejection apparent on his face.

"He was... no way. No chance. You�re joking. Don�t toy with me like
that,
voodoo boy."

"No, really, it�s true... Ryoga was watching and didn�t get upset,
so..."

Mousse fell back, digested that tidbit. "But that�s GREAT! He�s really
going to... YES!" He pumped the fist in the air. "If he�s married to
Akane, then Shampoo will be mine! Gos, I could kiss you!"

"I�d really rather that you didn�t, okay?"

The deliriously happy Mousse started running down the street towards
Nerima, shouting his joy at the top of his lungs. Well, Gosunkugi
thought, at least this was making SOMEBODY happy. Somehow, he resisted
the urge to put a hex on Mousse.

---

Kaji took a sip of his tea. Truly, it was a MOST excellent tea... He
looked up, smiled at the lovely dream that had served it to him. Tendo
didn�t deserve such a wonderful daughter.

"So, tell me, Ryoji-kun, what are YOU up to these days?" Age had
treated Soun Tendo well, as he�d matured from a rather gangly young man
into an imposing and dignified father. He still had a laugh in his
voice. Of course, he�d broken down and cried no less than three times
since Kaji had arrived, an hour ago... Shame about his wife, to have
survived the Second Impact and then die of a disease.

"Ah, I�ve been to Germany, for several years. In fact, I just got in
last week, and thought I�d see how you were doing. An impressive dojo
this is, you know." Well, aside from the "patched" look. This place
must see more property damage than... adjectives failed Kaji.

"Well, you flatter me, Ryoji-kun. We don�t really have many students,
although things will pick up once my daughter marries, surely."

Kaji smiled at the young woman... uh... Kasumi? Yes, that was her name.
"Surely your future husband is a man blessed beyond all compare."

She laughed, lightly, and said, "Oh, no, he�s talking about Akane,
Ryoji-san."

"What? You hide yet more daughters from me, Tendo-kun?" He arched an
eyebrow.

"Well, you yourself told me what a wolf you were in your younger days...

she should be back shortly from her morning exercise run."

Hm... the name "Akane" seemed familiar. Not from his old memories, but
something very recent. Work? Well, yes, it pretty much had to be... "I
should look forward to meeting her, then."

Kaji noticed three forms coming over the garden wall. "Do you suffer
frequent attacks, Tendo-kun?"

"Ah, yes, we do..." Soun glanced out the open porch door, seemed to
recognize the forms. One headed toward the house, while the other two,
no, three now, headed for the dojo.

"Hey, Tendo-san. Is Pop around?" Kaji turned... WOW. She was gorgeous.
Maybe seventeen, bright eyes, cute face, ample... something grabbed his
hindbrain and twisted, HARD. Missing something, missing something... red

hair. In a ponytail. Red Chinese shirt with wooden ties. Black silk
pants, baggy. Warning bells went off in Kaji�s head.

"No, son, he�s out right now. Look, here�s a old friend of mine, Kaji
Ryoji. Kaji, meet Ranma Saotome."

The little warning bells were replaced by the blaring klaxons. He KNEW
that name. Oh, but he�d never expected any meeting to go like THIS... he

extended his hand. "THE Ranma Saotome? I�ve heard a lot about you."
Good, good, his body was working on autopilot.

"Pleased to meetcha." Ranma grabbed his hand, pumped twice, and then
headed towards the kitchen with a totally unnecessary bounce. "Kasumi,
I�m going to heat some water, all right?"

"That�s fine, Ranma."

A little part of Kaji�s mind realized that he was in shock. For now, it
wasn�t in the way, not badly, but he wasn�t going to be able to keep a
blas� expression up for much longer. "Well... it�s good to see you
again,
Tendo-kun. I... must go now, my job, you know..." Hm... he was breaking
down
already. "I shall see you again, I think."

"Thank you for stopping by. It�s good to know that you survived, you
know." Soun�s face was completely open and happy.

Kaji stumbled out of the dojo, somehow managed to fumble the keys to
his car into the lock. No, he couldn�t drive like this, not through the
hell that the Nerima road system comprised anyway... He closed the door
and started walking. A good, stiff drink would be EXACTLY what he
needed, right now. Yeah. Maybe a few of them.

And Misato was going to be furious. Beyond that. And he�d have to tell
her... right?

---

Ranma poured the contents of the kettle over his head, shifting back
into his male form. After using the nearby towel to dry off and mop up
the spilled water, he refilled the kettle and replaced it on the
warmer. That had been a WONDERFUL idea. Well worth the price that
Nabiki had overcharged him.

He walked into the dojo, deftly avoiding Ryoga�s pack in the doorway.
Asuka was STILL snickering about Tarou. Rei, however, was still
completely stone-faced. Maybe she didn�t think it was funny? "Hey,
what�s up?"

Ryoga stretched out on the mat. "Ah... not much. I just need to work out

a couple of sore spots, you know."

Ranma grinned. "Yeah. You were pretty torn up last night."

"So were you."

"Was not," Ranma lied. "Besides, at least I got home by myself."

Ryoga lay his head back. "Yeah, whatever. I don�t feel like fighting
today anyway."

Rei walked over and started punching one of Akane�s training dummies.
She had no form, no stance, but the technique wasn�t bad. It looked an
awful lot like his own, with a little bit of Ryoga�s mixed in. Whatever
it was, it seemed to be working well on the dummy.

"Hey, Rei, go try to hit Ranma instead. He�s better for practice."

"Okay." Rei dusted her hands off and started towards Ranma.

"What, don�t I get a say in this?" He smiled. "Go ahead, I won�t hit
you."

Rei paused. "Um... won�t this hurt him, Ryoga?"

"If you can hit ME, Rei, you�re a lot better than you look." Ranma
assumed a ready stance.

"Isn�t he modest, Ryoga?" Asuka slumped against one of the walls, still
laughing.

"Are you kidding? I�m surprised he can fit his head through the door."

Rei frowned, slightly, and shifted her weight. Ranma read the first
punch, smoothly dodged it, then the second, and fell into an easy
rhythm. "Don�t overextend that much, you don�t get full striking power
and it leaves you off-balance. Tighten your fists or you�ll hurt your
hands when you hit something. Try moving your left foot back a bit, to
present more of a profile..."

It was uncanny, really. As soon as he pointed out a flaw in Rei�s
attacks, she fixed it. Sure, she overcorrected a couple of times, but...

Ranma couldn�t recall EVER seeing somebody work on their techniques
this way. He threw his head down, ducking a particularly cunning
strike. "Ha. ALMOST got me."

Rei squinted, then shifted slightly... and exploded in a blur of motion.

Ranma quickly abandoned all pretense of smooth dodging and worked his
hands and arms like windmills. One fist barely grazed the bottom of his
chin, and he realized that his jaw open as wide as it would go. She
broke the attack off and sank to the floor, panting heavily.

Ranma did likewise, although he wasn�t really winded. That was... well,
incredible. Rei had down the Kachuu Tenshin Amaguriken technique. Sure,
it was fairly sloppy, slow, and rough for that attack... but she�d only
seen it ONCE. And tried it twice, unless she was practicing somewhere
else. Or maybe she was learning from Cologne? No, not possible, the
FIRST thing the old hag would have worked on would have been the punch
technique.

Ryoga sat up. "Wow, that was pretty cool, Rei."

"Really?" She flexed her fists, painfully. Well, Ranma assumed it was
hurting, from the way the tendons were moving in odd directions, but it
didn�t show on her face. "But it�s not working right."

"Well, there are a few things... hell, not really. How did you do that?"

Rei blinked. "Don�t YOU know?"

"Yeah, I know how I do it. But it took me a couple of weeks of intense
practice to pull that off. And I was a lot better than you to start.
Have you ever met Cologne?"

"Huh? No."

Ryoga broke in. "Yes, you did. We ate ramen over there, remember?"

"What, the old woman?"

"Yeah, that�s Cologne. Go talk to her and show her that, and I�ll bet
she can train you. Just promise not to use it on me, okay?"

"Uh..." Rei blinked twice. "Sure."

Asuka yawned. "Yeah, yeah, very impressive, we�re all worshipping you."

Ryoga flared his aura again, this time with a good bit more green in
it, but Asuka merely responded with her tongue... and a water pistol.
The
bastard! No, she didn�t shoot it, she was just brandishing it in a
vaguely threatening manner.

Ranma heard a noise from outside. One person, running, in through the
gate... ah. "Hey, Akane�s back."

"Well, that�s our cue... come on, Ryoga, we�ve got to go home." Asuka
stood up and walked over to him, offering a hand up.

"Uh, why?"

"Stupid. OBVIOUSLY, Ranma has something to GIVE to Akane... right?"

"OH, yeah, right. Come on, Rei. Let�s go." Ryoga hopped up and
shouldered his pack. "Look, Ranma, make sure you treat her all right.
Maybe try THINKING before you talk. I won�t stand for her crying..."

Ranma bit back an angry reply. Hey, that was easy. "Okay, P-chan. Now
scoot."

---

End of part 12

Comments, questions, flames go to akent@bayou.uh.edu

Hope you all liked it...

Andy Kent
--
"He'd been an angel once. He hadn't meant to Fall.
He'd just hung around with the wrong people."
Crowley, Good Omens