And now, moving right along, here's chapter 10. Chapter 11 may take a
few days longer than this one, because it's a *major* chapter. C&C
welcome, as always. 

How about a few random comments?

	Chapter Ten

	Watching unseen from above, Mimas silently changed Shingo's status
to 'suite occupant', before deciding that perhaps it would be a good
idea to shut down for a while.

  You know, maybe it's the result of reading so much Ray Bradbury when I 
was growing up, but I just can't bring myself to be comfortable with the 
idea of a semi-sentient house...

	He had paid a price for the energy he collected from the crystal
prison. Unfortunately, he was hard-pressed to decide what exactly
that price had been. It didn't matter, though. All that mattered was
the power.

  Hmmm... This bit of foreshadowing (later echoed in the loss of 
control--I'm assuming the two are related) seems kind of clunky to me.I 
guess part of it is that I've always found it unlikely that people who 
have decided to pay some undefined "price" for their power (usually 
revealed later as their soul, or their humanity, or somesuch), would 
ever have enough of their old self to even bother considering the 
question, turning paragraphs like the above into something closer to 
author narration.
  How about, instead, some reference to how it felt as the power was 
being drained:  "Slowly, inexorably, the crystal's dark power had filled 
him, replacing pieces of himself with its own dark purpose."
Or am I just trying to teach my grandmother how to steal sheep?

	"What?" Venus asked again, brow furrowed.
	Artemis looked down. "Nevermind. I didn't sense anything."
	Venus shot him a wary glance, but decided not to press the issue.

   You know, you'd think he would have learned by now....


And so the eventual development of Crystal Tokyo gets a jumpstart, 
thanks to Jadeite, just as a certain fire paved the way for the 
rebuilding of Chicago, oh so long ago....

(Sorry if this seems callous, but that really is how I interpreted 
Jadeite's buring of the city....)

Great stuff.  Looking forward to that Chapter 11!

--Freemage

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