The only reason I can plead that I've taken so long to post this chapter
here is that I was unsure it'd been preread.  For those of you who wish to
know what I call pre-reader gathering, it's best described as shameless
plugging on a chat room I haven't been able to visit during its normal
peak hours over this summer.  Of course, its peak hours are between
midnight and 3:00 A.M., but I'm on at that time during the fall and
getting paid for it, so....

Anyway, hope you like, hope you remember, and I hope someone out there
who reads this and likes their versions in compiled .txt format would also
know how to make a .txt document on a Red Hat Linux server without setting
up programs that I'm unable to without control of the server itself.  I
should still be able to get it out to Aldrich Bautista given time, but a
small personal archive of separate chapters in said format that I'm
secretly setting up likes FTP, and that's the only FTP program I have
access to while I'm away from OSU.  (And, no, I can't exchange files
between the computer I'm working on and the server, AFAIK.  It doesn't
know how to check a computer's hard drive for upload.  If you even have
good hack ideas here, pass 'em along.  Oh, and pass any thing of this sort
along privately, because I'm too young to be banned.  ^_^)

And, for those of you who read the web versions, I think I'd better change
the colors on the first page.

--------------------------------------------------

With some encouraging response (read:  one person asked for a
copy of whatever chapters she'd been missing, and was patient
while I tried to make a text file that her comp wouldn't mind),
we shall get going with Chapter Six.  Somehow, I'm going to get
these guys to 8:00 P.M. Friday.  I must.  It is inevitable.  (It is
becoming harder to convince myself.)  Anyway, here's the
rundown for those just joining us and scared to look at the
earlier chapters.

Sakura is having a sleepover, and it appears that just about
anyone that I'm willing to risk copyright infringement over is
showing up somehow.
One of those who has arrived already is Mihoshi, who is invited
due to her arrival via crash landing.
Others have arrived from various anime series, and are invited
due to not having the slightest idea how to get back through the
portal Mihoshi opened in her feeble attempt to clone food.
The number increased steadily as everyone managed to forget
closing the dimensional gateway up to about now.
We have a group standing on the ship preparing to enter the
ship and a pig about to land on said ship about, oh...

*splat*

...now, I'd say.  And, his luck being what it is, he landed in hot
water (literally, due to the water spilling out of the spaceship's
radiator being heated by ground so close to the magma layer).
Just thought I'd mention that, if only to give meaning to these
inane openings and all.

*gets whapped severely*

Hey, just wait. I have worse planned.

As for who's showing up this time around, we have:

>From Urusei Yatsura, another of the masterpieces of Rumiko
Takahashi and Viz, we have the bikini alien herself, Lum;
>From Sailor Moon, another one of the "We Had To Sometime"
entries and a copyright of Toei Animation, comes Sailor Jupiter;
>From Slayers, another one of the oddball choices we're
selecting because we can and wish to flagrantly exercise our
rights, we have two characters owned by Software Sculptors
named Lina Inverse and Gourry;
>From Final Fantasy III, another type of media altogether,
known as a role-playing video game, and the property of
Square Co. Ltd, we introduce Celes and Locke;
And, from Kimagure Orange Road, another bad idea, and the
property of AnimEigo, we have...two people you should
recognize if you've ever seen the thing.  You'll find out later - it'd
ruin the surprise.

-------------------------------------------------

The three draftees walked into the ship, armed with whatever
martial arts they knew, a hammer that appeared to have uses
other than the normal function due to its size being well over the
specifications for car body work, and a small Galactic
Police-issue laser.  They would have gone farther, but it just
didn't look safe for some odd reason.  Perhaps it was the
electricity in the air...literally.  Or, maybe it could be attributed
to the whistling and clanging swords swinging all around the
ship.  It could also possibly be due to the assorted explosions
that just went off, blowing a large hole in a genetic waste tube.
It could even be a combination of some of the aforementioned
idiosyncrasies, which may or may not have been combined with
a good dose of common sense.  At any rate, something kept
them from immediately going inside.

The draftors decided therefore that a friendly nudge was in
order, and a moderately oversized spatula offered the
propulsion necessary to get the trio far enough into the ship to
close the door and wait for success.

After Ranma extricated himself from the confinement of a
dented wall, Akane, and Mihoshi, he made a mental note to
ask Ukyo why she used more than the necessary propulsion,
and looked at the surrounding mayhem.

Sailor Jupiter was apparently convinced that Lum was a
"youma", and the battle betweem the two would have been
sufficient to power a small village.  Some blond guy in the corner
was having a pleasant conversation with a lady with long blond
hair over a swordfight.  A lady with red hair nearby was
shouting something about stealing her food and a fireball at
some guy with a beard and old clothes.

Akane decided to try sticking her wooden mallet into the
swordfight, while Ranma chose to see what could be done
about getting the two fire-slinging spellcasters away from each
other.  That left Mihoshi alone to go for the lever and the electric
catfight well enough alone - the equipment around them was
shorted out by now, and hence no need to do something
completely stupid. 

Akane dodged a slash nimbly and realized the problem of
dealing with metal weapons without metal to protect oneself
with.  With the mallet obviously useless, she threw it away,
which happened to be a direction towards the dueling duo and,
in fact, right between their clashing swords.  This caused both
swords to be instantly imbedded in the block of wood that was
the head of the mallet, proving to be the perfect method in
getting the two to quit fighting and that the old saying, "Don't
argue with success," has applications even today. 

As for Locke and Lina, it appeared that Locke was trying to
avoid Lina more than fight the lady.  He probably has the same
honor I do, Ranma thought.  He doesn't want to fight the
lady. Of course, I don't want to hit her...so now what?
Then, Ranma noticed the pile of food.  Now, we could have
Ranma be smart and announce that there's a ton of food in the
house topside if she'd just stop pounding on Locke. But, what
happened instead was Ranma showing that he had learned
nothing from the last time he just started eating a pile of food
that happened to be sitting there.  As it was, it worked.  Locke
was let go as Lina turned her attention to the new idiot who
appeared to be just begging for a fireball.  A few moments of
running around and dodging flames later, and Akane preserved
Ranma's cowardly self with a swing of a leaking genetic waste
disposal unit. 

While this mess was going on, Mihoshi headed over to the
proper lever (she got lucky) and attempted to turn the machine
off.  After Ranma and Akane had finished calming down the
natives, she notified the two that she was having a slight bit of
trouble with the lever.  Apparently, that spot of the ship,
combined with a nasty amount of electric current, was slightly
magnetized, and the resulting field was holding the lever
towards the on position.

Ranma and Akane looked at the mess left from the other four,
looked at Sailor Jupiter and Lum still sending lightning bolts in
all directions, and then looked at each other.  Managing the feat
of simultaneous speech, they gave a terse, two-word answer:
"We'll wait."

---------------------------------------
---------------------------------------

What to put in this break...hmm...

Eh, a quick explanation of my current situation for people who actually
were waiting for this:

I'm fairly happy to be home, though, due to such, I have limited options
with my Internet access.  I'm lucky that I work in Archbold, which is also
the location of Northwest State Community College.  FYI, the account I use
for the FFML is from here, due to its lack of complaint about e-mail
storage.  (I'm surprised, especially since I transferred to OSU after one
year.)  However, as I'm not working at a computer lab over the summer, I
now have to consider work, sleep, and e-mail three separate things instead
of just two, and I need sleep or cops wonder at my driving skills.  Hence,
I haven't taken the time yet to start on Chapter 7 (or, when I have, the
stupid browser crashes before I save...grr...), but I will shortly, don't
worry.  Also, at some point, I'll get going with Ranma and Ryoga:
Freelance Police, despite my qualms over not knowing much about pirate
accountants...okay, that's bad foreshadowing, but I've done worse with the
genetic waste disposal...okay, I'll shut up now.  Back to the fanfic we
go.

---------------------------------------
---------------------------------------

About an hour or so later, the group managed to turn off the
portal and subsequently took Washu's homemade repulsorlift
back to the surface, where Sakura was currently looking down
and worrying about Ryoga getting caught.  Of course, Akane
would just think it's a black pig similar to P-Chan, but one
would think the clues would add up to four sometime before
rigor mortis.  As it was, she saw a slightly bruised Ryoga exit the
chasm, along with the rest of the stranded anime characters.
She then saw that there were more of them.

Sakura was getting used to this, but was still having problems
with liking uninvited guests appearing at the author's whim.  But,
as it wasn't the character's fault, she greeted them warmly.  "Hi,
I'm Sakura, this is my house, make yourselves comforatble.
Um, we're having a party in a bit - would you like to help set
up, or punk the idiot who brought you here?"

The chorus of Deion Sanders resonated throughout Tokyo.

A short while later, the real guests that were expected to come
finally started showing up.  After meeting the unfortunate and
unwitting houseguests and gaping at the drop five steps past the
opening to the backyard, the early arrivals began helping with
the decorations in order to leave the houseguests free to
attempt pain and torture upon my fragile and *ow* pathetically
weak body.  After discovering that the power used by the
Delorean's time-travel module from Back to the Future can
really hurt when sent through your body every five seconds for
about fifteen minutes, I found a good hiding place, ditched this
completely mindless train of thought, and continued with the
story.

The author long gone and well done, the rest of the decorations
were put up, the food was set out (and, five minutes later, more
was ordered), and some more of the invited guests arrived.
Kasumi from Dead or Alive was happily chatting, bouncing,
eating, bouncing, showing off a few of her ninja moves, and
bouncing some more.  As Sakura set out to find the author and
cleanse his dirty mind with blue fireballs, Roll arrived via Beat
Plane along with Lilith, Elena, and Narumi.  After the bird gently
touched down, opened up, and flew off, promising to pick them
up tomorrow morning as soon as they called, the trio joined the
veritable mayhem that could only be a sleepover party.  As
more guests began to arrive, the clock struck 8:00, and, in a
roped-off area of what remained of the backyard, a
complicated device containing one super-genius scientist as
cargo appeared out of nowhere. Upon arrival, she looked
around, saw the crowd, and gave her frank opinion: "Let's
party!"

However, the author was not lucky enough to get off without a
double-take.  And, at that point, Washu noted that a large
number of people from dimensions she knew of that were in no
way related to the one she was standing in just happened to be
around.  Her instinct proved to save the poor writer, however,
as Washu instead started looking for Mihoshi with the intent of
doing serious harm.  Of course, everybody else went after him
when they saw the bus pull up to the house.

--------------------------------------------

Compared to the last time, where he was tied to a chair and
gagged, this seemed less threatening.  That is, if you didn't know
where the water in the bucket that the author was precariously
hanging above had been taken from.  They were at least nice
enough not to gag him this time, perhaps - they just said that
he'd be dropped in immediately if he so much as peeped for
help, and hence would choke while discovering personally the
exact spring the water had been drawn from.  With that thought
drifting through his mind, he decided to remain silent until they
began the screaming.

Sakura, being the person who would likely be held responsible
by her mother for this mess, began the inquisition gently.  "WHY
THE #*@( DO YOU NEED SO MANY )@%^ ANIME
CHARACTERS IN A FANFIC FOR FIGHTING
CHARACTERS?!"

Perhaps gentle wasn't quite the correct term, but the contrast
worked for humor value.  "I don't know," the author pleaded.
"Perhaps, it's because one of the main intended audiences of
this fanfiction is anime fans."

"Then why bother with fighting characters at all?" said Akane,
twirling her mallet idly.  She'd already threatened to make water
to be considered the Spring of Drowned Fanfic Writer in what
some people hanging from a rope upside down considered to
be a rather crude and messy fashion.

"Well," the author reasoned, "I also have quite a few readers
who are more into fighting games than cartoons.  They still
appreciate anime, and some are in fact avid followers
themselves; however, they know the fighting genre more, and in
fact are probably the closest thing to what I can call prereaders.
I also must add that many anime productions have been made
concerning video games, and that I myself am a video game
fanatic."

"Did you have to bring in so many characters, period?" asked
Merle, playing with the rope above my head and waiting for a
good reason to check her nails.  "I mean, it's gotta be hard to
manage and all."

"It might get that way, yes." The author collected himself.
"However, I'm trying to use that as a bit of a running gag,
perhaps - despite Sakura's intentions, the small, twenty-person
party she planned for the evening is going to grow beyond
expectations, but, in the end, she'll perhaps be glad it did."

Mihoshi, surprisingly, noted the unspoken calamity in my
sentence. "You mean, Washu won't be able to get you guys
home right away?"

Mihoshi managed to time this phrase at the exact moment that
Washu entered the remains of her lab.  Looking at the controls,
she began to press the combination of keys required to open
the gateway to the dimension where Ranma had come from.
"Assuming the equipment hasn't fallen out of calibration due to
the crash, which, since their was no large energy displacement
involved, should not have happened, this will work."  A hum
signified the opening of the gateway, and Washu peered in.

"Ushiko-san, Ushiko-san, wherefore art thou Ushiko-san?"

"Umao-san, Umao-san, wherefore art thou Umao-san?"

Speaking of running gags...

------------------------------------------

For those of you who made it this far, don't kill me - I couldn't resist.

Hope you liked.  C&C/MST/Flame/Prod to your heart's content.  Please.  I
read and appreciate, and try to fix as best as I can

And, how do you pluralize Deion Sanders?

Nicholas Eckert
vidstudent