Disclaimers are at the end, people... I want a little tiny bit of suspense
in this thing.

****

It was getting to be rather monotonous, actually. Fight your way through
hordes of faceless minions, (actually, they all had the same face, but
calling them "same-faced minions" would sound silly) confront the Evil
Villain (tm), confound his latest maniacal scheme, and head home for a bit
of R&R until said villain could lick his wounds and unleash another Evil
Plot (tm). Which is why they were hardly surprised when, after having taken
out a few dozen ninjas and making their way to the robot's storage hanger,
the villain's screeching voice echoed from loudspeakers conveniently placed
in the ceiling.

"I have you now!"

"How many times has he said that?" asked the one in blue of the one in pink.

"I lost count around 200," she replied.

"Ha! You think my repeated failures will stop me?" came the voice through
the loudspeaker.

"They haven't so far," said the three, in unison.

"Exactly! And this time you'll surely perish! Ah hahahahahahahaaaaa!" It was
amazing, really, how a maniacal cackle could retain its life and vigor after
repeated beatings.

"How many times have we heard THAT?" asked the one in pink of the one in
white.

"Ehhh, I lost count around 50," he replied.

"Enough mockery, you fools! This robot is infused with the knowledge of the
greatest martial artist in all of Japan! You'll be helpless before it!" With
that, the loudspeakers clicked off, and power conduits hummed as the robot
slowly came alive. Its eyes widened as it came online.

And widened.

And widened some more.

And continued to widen.

And probably would have filled its entire face if the eye servos hadn't
jammed from the strain.

A strange battlecry came from the robot's throat as it ripped free of its
scaffolding.

"...nekonekonekonekonekonekoneko..."

The robot raced around the room with incredible speed and the three dropped
into a guarded stance.

"...nekonekonekoNEKONEKONEKONEKO..."

But its motions seemed less like that of some bizarre attack and more like
blind panic.

"...NEKONEKONEKONEKONEKONEKONEKO..."

And blind panic was exactly what carried the robot back to the jagged
metallic spikes, which were all that remained of its scaffolding. It raced
into the wall... and more than a few of the spikes hit more than a few of
the robot's vital systems.

"...NEKO...neko...ne...ko..."

The robot exploded in a spectacular display of pyrotechnics, unparalleled by
anything save the previous twenty or so such explosions. In doing so, it
launched the control booth (conveniently but stupidly located directly over
the robot's head) off into the distance, never to be seen again... until the
inevitable Villain Revenge Hunt (tm).

"Well, that was... different..." remarked the one in white.

"Give me this over a fight any day. Race you back to the pizza parlor?" said
the one in blue.

A blue streak and a white one raced out of the warehouse and over the
rooftops.

"Last one back does the dishes!" called the blue one after he was nearly
over the horizon.

A pink streak joined the two, screaming, "Guido Anchovy, when I get my claws
on you..."

"Hey, Speedy, I wouldn't go that way if I were you."

"And why not? It's a perfectly good shortcut. I'M not doing dishes tonight."

"Well, it WOULD be a perfectly good shortcut if they'd finished repairing
the..."

"YAAAAAAAaaaaaaaa..." *splash*

"...bridge."

****

The top floor of a nearby pagoda exploded, for no apparent reason.

****

Ladies and gentlemen, the Samurai Pizza Cats / Ranma 1/2 crossover. You may
shoot me now.

And, of course, Ranma 1/2 is Rumiko Takahashi's and SPC belong to Saban. And
any and all distributors of either series own the rights. I'm not trying to
make a profit off of these, nor is this intended as canon. Hope you laughed.
I did when I thought this up.

--G. Falconar