Spamfic!  Beware of silliness, stupidity, and bad humour.

You've been warned.


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                   Ranma 1/2 : The Smell Of Romance

                           by Shunsuke -|||

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It was a rainy day in Nerima when Genma Saotome knocked upon the door
of his old friend, Soun Tendo, to fulfil an agreement they had made
many years earlier.  He made this visit with some trepidation over
whether it would be successful; he hoped for the best, but was still
worried, and with good reason.  When the door opened, he was greeted by
a young, beautiful and warm teenage girl.  This made him grimace
internally even more that he already had, knowing she might be a
victim in all of this.

"Hello, how can I help you?"

"Hello, Miss Tendo, I would like to speak to your father.  Please tell
him it is an old friend who has come to fulfil a matter of honor," said
Genma, closing his umbrella as he walked in from the rain.

Kasumi led him inside to the main room where Soun Tendo stood.  Upon
meeting, they embraced each other like old friends.

"Saotome, my friend, how good it is to see you again," began Soun as
he let Genma to the table to be seated.  "I can take it you are here
to complete our agreement of many years ago?"

"Yes...yes, I am," said Genma who was clearly trying to find a way to
say what he needed to.  "My son has grown into a manly man, so much so
that he insisted that we see his mother before I brought him here.
She was very impressed at my success, though I fear it has not been
without a price..."

Genma went on to explain about their trip to China, and about Jusenkyo,
going as far as using cold and hot water on himself to demonstrate the
true horror of the curse.

Genma also went on to explain about the Amazon village of Joketsuzoku,
and how the two had barely escaped with their lives; after what Ranma
had done to that girl Shampoo, most certainly the amazons would have
had panda stew for dinner and a dead teenage boy (though they would
not have known that) on their hands.

Once Soun recovered, Genma explained Ranma's curse to Soun, who
realized a possible difficulty with it when he told his daughters;
unfortunately for them, he had not mentioned anything about the
arranged marriage as of yet, so he decided to do so before Ranma
arrived.

"Kasumi!  Nabiki!  Akane!  Come here, I have some important news
for you!"

"What is it, father?" Kasumi said while drying her hands on a
dishtowel.

"What do you want, Daddy?  I was negotiating on the phone with
Kuno-baby."  Nabiki entered dressed in shorts and t-shirt with a
pencil lodged behind her ear.

"Yes, Dad?  What is it?" Akane entered wearing a gi, having just
finished her workout.  She joined her sisters at the table, and
listened to what their father had to say.

"FIANCE?!?!?" the girls shouted in unison as the rain continued to
pelt outside but drowned out by their collective scream.  Genma
cringed, wondering if this was the best time to have Ranma come over.

"Daddy, how could you arrange for one of us to be married to a guy we
don't even know?"

"It was an agreement between my friend and I, many years ago, to join
our two families," Soun said while Genma sat there.  The girls looked
at Genma and could see that something was up, though they could never
have guessed what.  Soon enough, there was a knock on the door.

"That must be my son, I asked him to come a few minutes after I 
arrived," Genma announced.

Kasumi rose to answer the door, and as she went around the corner,
Soun turned to his friend.

"Why didn't you bring him with you?"

"It was...it was better that he arrive here wet due to his curse,"
Genma whispered to Soun, "He's not one for the ladies in his normal
body."

Kasumi dashed back into sight from the hallway holding her nose, a
look of fright in her eyes.  She ran past everyone to hide in the
kitchen behind the door.

"My sweet, where have you run to?  Mon dieu, I must...Hellooooo, my
pretties," said Ranma as he entered the room.  Nabiki and Akane both
gasped in horror at the sight before them that slowly walked in their
direction.  "Ah, mon cheri," he cried as he first saw Nabiki, "How I
have longed to see ze face of an angel."  

Nabiki cringed and pulled back as Ranma advanced toward her; in doing
so, Akane came into his view, and Ranma was overrun by new feelings
of affection, almost as strong as his odor.

"Attirant!  Oh, my little blossom, come with me, we shall make ze
beautiful music togezzer..." Ranma cooed as he glomped her.  In total
fear, Akane kicked Ranma in the head and ran over the engawa for dear
life.  

Dazed, Ranma turned to his father and said, "She is ze flirt, no?" and
then ran after her.  Once he was gone, Soun stopped holding his breath
and Kasumi came back into the room to where Genma hung his head,
crying.

"Oh, the shame of it...my son, my son, how could you fall in the
Spring of Drowned French Skunk...?"

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                        E         N         D

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For those who lived a deprived childhood, I turned Ranma into Pepe 
Le Pew of _Looney Tunes_ fame; I just figured it was one way to make 
Ranma into an incurable romantic.  If anyone wants to take this idea 
and run with it, be my guest, just don't blame me for what happens.
^_^

Shunsuke



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