Here is part 2 of Episode 1 of Kawaikune Team Fighters!

	The solar winds whistled around his body as he moved. Around him he
could he see a the universe, a plane of existence living, breathing,
and watching girls in magical sailor suits fight evil. A never ending
landscape of suns, moons, and planets surrounded him. As he sailed
through the void that was not empty, he saw galaxies born and stars
playing freeze tag on the vast interstellar summer meadow of space.
This was reality. This was the home he'd always known.
	Then there was a bright light. It reminded him of when he slept late
on the weekends and the sun was already risen and shining through his
window so that when he woke up and opened his delicate eyes to a brand
new morning he was struck blind for those first few minutes of
consciousness. Very similar indeed, except that this light was a sort
of divine mega-cosmic version of that light. As he expected, his
vision failed for a few moments. All went white, then black, then an
odd fuscia color. The colors began to dance and twirl in ways that
seemed familiar yet new. 
	"Wait, I must either be going through hyper-space or preparing for a
vast cosmic revelation. This is how they always animate those things."
	He relaxed and let whatever was going on go on. The colors reversed
themselves and then faded, even the bright light began to recede. He
looked around him and let out a gasp of awe. Where there had once been
a his one universe, he could now see a huge sphere of universes or
universi. He was unaware of the correct pluralization. These spread
out far beyond the limits of his vision and each was set at a
different angle, like the spokes on his bicycle were before he went
through his "I-Want-To-Be-An-Inventor" phase so many years ago. They
all shone, each with a different light. Some were golden, others
silver, still others a sort of luminescent purple. 
	They all converged at one point and from that point he could see that
light that had blinded him before. Around that one point all the
spokes were rotating as if some vast cosmic bicyclist was pedaling in
an eternal marathon.
	Then everything went black again and instead of a pleasant sensation
of floating, he felt a terrifying feeling of falling which didn't end
until he slammed head first into the ground.
	
	Patrick pulled himself from the dirt floor and tried to dust off his
clothes to no avail.  Looking around, he discovered that he was in a
cave dimly lit by a source he couldn't identify. The walls were a deep
rich blue, well toned and freshly inked. They were also covered in
frost, as was the ground, the stalactites, the three bodies of his
friends crumpled on the floor, and himself.  
	"Jesus, its cold," Jeff said as he pulled himself from the ground.
"Hey Patrick. Have you seen any place we could get something to eat?"	
	Patrick shook his head. "Nope. Just recently regained consciousness
myself."
	"Great. Cold and starving."
	Ivan was the next to wake up. He cleaned his glasses and looked
around the cave. "Its cold. I should have brought a coat. Hey Adam. Go
get me a coat." He kicked the final figure laying on the ground.
	"Go get your own," the figure mumbled as he stood up. "Oh damn. I
forgot to give Krillin the tapes for Bakaretsu Hunters."
	Ivan cleaned his glasses again since they had already fogged over and
said, "I think he's stopped distributing them, since ADV picked up the
t.v. series."
	"Nah. ADV is always slow to release stuff, plus its his favorite
series. But I was hoping to get a copy before school ended. We were
going to watch it in Physics class."
	"Physics?" Jeff asked.
	"Yup. Part of the final was going to be based on the physics of
Chocolate's change in breast size when in her battle umm.... suit."
	" I wish I had your physics teacher. Mine just keeps telling us he's
an alien."
	"Hey guys. Does anybody happen to know where we are?" Patrick asked.
	"We're in a cave," said Adam.
	"I can see that. I meant something a little more specific."
	"We are in a cold cave. With blue walls," Ivan suggested. 
	"I'm not cold. See I planned ahead and wore a jacket. But thats not
the point. AGH! You all are hopeless!"
	"You know, you really need to calm down and go with the flow when
these things happen," said Jeff. 
	"Yeah. Just repeat to yourself, 'What would City Hunter do? What
would City Hunter do?" 
	"Good idea, Adam!" Patrick's sarcasm went largely unnoticed. "Okay.
I'm going to walk in the one direction we have to walk in, which is
that way. I really would appreciate it very much if everybody followed."
	He pointed into the glowing blue darkness. "See? That way."
	"But why?"
	"Because Jeff is hungry, Ivan is cold, you need to give tapes to
Krillin and I lost my picture of Ruri-Chan!" Patrick screamed starting
to lose his temper.
	When he grabbed Adam and began pummeling him violently with a
hardened piece of a Butterfinger bar he had found in his pocket, Ivan
said, "I think it is safe to say Patrick has lost his temper."	
	"I think he's taking losing the picture remarkably well, come to
think of it. You'd think she was his soulmate from the way he guards
it," Jeff said.
	"SHE IS MY SOULMATE!" A hairy visage of rage formerly known as
Patrick turned on a hapless Jeff. 
	"I feel your pain Patrick. Calm down. Friend, Patrick. Friend. Calm.
Peace." Adam grabbed the gibbering maniac from behind and held him
pinioned until he started breathing normally again.
	"I feel good," he said as he leaned against a wall. 
	Ivan said, "That was really cool. Just like the berserker from Lodoss."
	"Really. I might be an anime hero yet," he said wistfully.
	"Its something we all dream of," Adam said. 
	"A dream calling tomorrow," Ivan added.
	The three sighed as one and spoke. "Something we desire."
	"Not me, I'm just hungry."
	"Shut up Jeff."
	"Wait!" Adam exclaimed, leaping up. "We are in a cave, ne?"
	"Hai!"
	"We formerly were at the Anime Parthenon, ne?"
	"Hai!"
	"We all experienced a vision of naked dancing girls telling us of
some great destiny laid out before us, ne?"
	"Hai!"
	"Well, actually, I had a deep cosmic revelation about the nature of
reality and the way all the various universes, or universi- I'm not
sure which- interconnect."
	"Oh, sorry."
	"I never get visions of naked dancing girls."
	"Poor Patrick. Anyway, now we are all here with only one path laid
open before us. A path that leads into the cold blue glowing darkness
over there, ne?"
	"Hai!"
	"Well then we have no option! We were obviously moved here for some
reason as opposed to some random quirk of inter-dimensional fate, so
lets go meet are destiny and maybe even pick up some special powers in
the process."
	"Alright."
	And so the four bravely journeyed into the darkness. Adam bravely led
the way, with Patrick and Ivan a mere step behind, and cringing in the
shadows, Jeff tried to avoid making his presence known. Then
everything faded to black as a commercial break began.

<<<< COMMERCIAL BREAK >>>>

	Adam runs across the scene chasing Patrick with a sword while Ivan
and Jeff sit on a couch behind them drinking spritzers. 

	"Are you tired? Hungry? Alone? Does every morning seem like a chore
and every night like a long dark wait for sunrise? Does everything you
do turn out wrong? Does life just seem not worth living? Well, we
believe we might have something that can help. Dial the toll free
number shown at the end of the commercial to talk to one of our
specialists about what JASHID can do for you. One of our qualified
operators will listen to your list of problems and after laughing at
you, will help set you up with the JASHID plan that is right for you.
So remember, JASHID, to cure make various unspecified problems
better." A phone number at the bottom of the screen is 1-55-352-2277.

	"Hi. I'm Christopher Bench, the voice of Adam in the popular t.v.
show Kawaikune Team Fighters, and I'm here to tell you about one of my
favorite things in the world. Yes, you probably guessed it.
Key-chains. And now, in the proud tradition of all the wonderful
key-chains of the world, S&M Toys brings you the Kawaikune Team
Fighters Key-Chain Collection Series One. Here's me holding a sword in
a heroic stance. This is one is Patrick searching frantically through
his pockets. Sort of reminds of episode 27 when he lost the Key of
Gendo in that big jacket of his. Ivan, wearing that Trenchcoat of
Power, holding his shotgun and looking dangerous. And one of my
personal favorites, Jeff-Kun peeking up the skirts of a Minmei doll.
So hurry to your local anime store and buy one today. Tell the world
that you, too, are a Kawaikune Team Fighter. The KTF Key-Chain Series
One. Only from S&M Toys. Choose S&M for Something More." 
	
	Patrick with big claws and hair turned into tentacles chases Adam
across the screen to the other side as Jeff and Ivan play Jun-Ken-Po.

<<<< END COMMERCIAL BREAK >>>>

	Howdy folks. This is your friendly neighborhood narrator, Mr.
Universe, with the scorecard for today's episode. Do you have a
favorite member of the cast? Maybe that adorable dancing bear? Lets
see who's today's high scoring fighter.

#1: Adam
	Throwing Someone Into A Wall "Patrick no
                Baka!"5 pts.
	Giving the Evil Eye 3 Pts.
	Pulling Off Special Move: "ALPHA THETA        
                BUDWEISER KEN!" 10 pts.
	Wearing Anime Merchandise 4 pts.
	Having a Voice Actor Do a Commercial 4 pts.
	Total 26 pts.
#2: Patrick
	Noble Intentions "Adam! Pull over!" 3 Pts.
	Praying To An Anime Character 6 Pts.
	Explaining Someone Else's Special Move 4 Pts.
	Having a Cassette of Music Recorded Directly  
             From an Anime Show 5 Pts.
	For Going Into a Beserker Rage Over an Anime                Character
6 Pts.
	Total: 24 pts.
#3: Ivan
	Performing A Macho Dance 7 Pts.
	For Putting Anime Over Human Life "Does anybody 
               really care?" 6 Pts.
	Playing Jun-Ken-Po 8 Pts.
	Total: 21 pts.
#4: Jeff
	Drooling Over Anime Characters "You can take  
               its clothes off to... uhh..." 5 pts. 
	Concern For Others 3 Pts.
	Saying a Line Then Passing Out "I've been      
               screaming in pain." 4 Pts. 
	Playing Jun-Ken-Po 8 Pts.
	Total: 20 pts.
#5: Stan
	Pulling Off Special Move: "MERCHANDISE         
               WEY-PEN!!!!" 10 pts.
	Putting Anime Merchandise Above All Else 6 Pts.
	Total: 16 pts.
#6: Caroline
	Retaining an Honorific When Dubbed Into English 
               "Krill-baby?" 4 Pts.
	Running Around Half Naked "My underwear!" 
               7 Pts. 
	Being the Only Female Character and Still   
               Managing To Die 3 pts.
	Total: 14 pts.
#7: The Large Humanoid Thing With No Skin And Large 
               Claws
	For Killing Innocent People and Causing  
               Property Damage 6 Pts.
	Being a 2-Bit Dumb Monster That Survives an 
               Episode 6 pts.
	Total: 12 pts.
#8: Krillin
	Glowing In A Peace Causing Way 5 Pts.
	Having A Mysterious Flashback "Ryo..." 4 Pts.
	Total: 9 pts.
#9: Little Orphan Timmy
	Being a Cute Little Boy 2 Pts.
	Total: 2 pts.

	There you go! And don't forget about the contest. The reader that can
e-mail the author and identify the most anime will receive a very
special secret prize. So go back, reread, and send in those entries. 

(ENDING SONG)
(Sung by Christopher Bench, voice of Adam)
(A soft ballad with moving vocal stylings)
We sit down together not looking at each other
We stare blankly into the future 
As if its written on a screen
We try to understand each other 
If only we were subtitled
Sometimes its so confusing, you and me
But I love you, although I don't fully understand you
Still I plan my life around you
Because in the end, there's only you and me
Anime

	"Hi this is the Eternal Guide #3,425,769: Little Girl. I know you
haven't met me yet, but look forward to it in the next episode. I'm
cute, so I'll be okay. But in the face of danger what will happen to
our manly heroes?"
	"Death. Doom. Destruction. They'll never defeat me. BWAHAHAHA!"
	"Oh, no! Its the evil Dark Lord! Adam, be careful! Wait, what is
Patrick doing? He looks even stranger than before! Next episode is The
Letter That Spells Death! Fight on, Kawaikune Team Fighters!"
        "Blerrsku...piiiiiin......fuu....."

THE END

There you go. End of first episode. Flames, C&C, Contest Responses,
etc. are all welcome. Till next time, I'm Akito Tenkawa signing off.
Wow, my first late night fic write.
 

==
"I was so blind. Because I loved it so much, I only watched my favorite parts."
-Pilot Tenkawa Akito on Blazing Robo Gekiganger-3

When it doubt, go existential.
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