HALF A SORCERESS	

Chapter 5: Daze! The Future Isn't What Used to Be!

Written by: Jussi Nikander

Ranma 1/2 is a copyright by Rumiko Takahashi and
Shogakukan inc.
Slayers is copyright by Hajime Kanzaka, Rui Araizumi, TV
Tokyo, SOFTX and Egg Films
Not used under authorisation, but since I don't get any
money from this, don't sue me, okay?

Previous chapters can be found at

http://www.users.fl.net.au/~bcadwgan/Anime.htm

Many thanks to my prereaders, Barry Cadwgan, Ben Oliver
and Josh Prismon.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The pain was the first thing Shampoo registered. Every part
of her body throbbed like it was on fire. Moaning slightly, she
opened her eyes. It was dark, probably night.

"Good, you're awake." An old voice said in Chinese; a voice
Shampoo knew well.

"Great-grandmother?" She asked weakly. "Is that you?"

Leaning over Shampoo, the ancient Amazon smiled grimly.
"Yes, Shampoo, it is me. Can you remember what happened
to you?"

"I..." Shampoo tried to recall what had happened, but it was
hazy. "I... I followed the outsider girl and attacked several
times, but didn't manage to restore my honour."

Cologne's face disappeared from Shampoo's field of vision.
Turning her head, the young Amazon saw her elder sit down
next to her. Behind Cologne, a campfire was blazing.
"Can you remember what happened just before you lost
consciousness, Shampoo?"  Cologne asked.

Shampoo furrowed her brown, trying to remember. "I... I think
I found the outsider girl, again." She licked her lips. Slowly, it
was becoming clearer. "I attacked, but didn't hit. Then..."
Suddenly, Shampoo remembered everything. "Then she
shouted... meega-something, and... flames came from her
hand and... and... engulfed me."

Cologne nodded. "It is just as I suspected..." She said, mainly
to herself.

Shampoo tried to sit up, but she was too weak and it hurt too
much. She did get a look on herself, though. Her body was
mostly covered in makeshift bandages. "What did she do,
Great-grandmother? What was that technique?"

Cologne closed her eyes and seemingly meditated for a
minute.

"It was no martial arts technique, Shampoo." The old Amazon
finally said, opening her eyes and looking deep into
Shampoo's. "It was magic."

"Magic...?" Shampoo had seen Cologne performing her
magic several times in the village. It had never been anything
like this. "But... Great-grandmother..."

"It's unlike any magic I or any other Amazon knows." Cologne
cut in. "It was something that was once called sorcery, which
is a part of the high magic. It was thought lost centuries ago
with the rest of higher magical knowledge, but that girl
obviously knows it."

"Aiyah..." Shampoo said faintly. "How... How can I beat this
'sorcery', Great-grandmother?"

Cologne sighed. "I don't know, great-granddaughter."

"Don't know?"

"That type of magic was never native to China. Most of its
practitioners lived in the west, in a places now called Europe
and Western Asia. And the knowledge of sorcery, as well as
other high magic, was thought lost a long time ago The
village has only one book left that describes this magic, and I
can't understand half of what's said there." Cologne leaned to
Shampoo and poked at her neck. "Now, sleep, great-
granddaughter. We'll discuss this later, when you're feeling
better."

Shampoo tried to stay awake, but it was impossible to fight
the pressure point Cologne had used. Maybe, if she had
been in prime condition, she could have stayed awake, but
now, she was so tired...

For a while Cologne stared at the sleeping Shampoo. The
girl had been in bad shape when she had found her. She was
covered in soot and burns and her clothing had been ruined.
It was obvious that Shampoo had been attacked with
powerful fire magic.

Cologne had been right; right about the outsider girl. She
was an opponent Shampoo couldn't hope to match. Cologne
knew, from the old lore, that a magician was an almost
impossible foe for a warrior to defeat. And, from what she
had heard in Cunzhuang, this particular magician was also a
martial artist. Originally, Cologne had went after the outsider
and Shampoo to try and get the outsider to join the Amazons.
Now, she wasn't sure if that still was possible. And if it wasn't,
she had no idea how to beat the outsider.

It was obvious that Shampoo couldn't do it. She didn't have
the skill nor the experience to defeat a foe of that magnitude.
At least it was impossible under normal circumstances.
Unless the outsider had some kind of weak spot, Colonge
might have to step in and try to kill her herself. No matter how
dishonourable that was. No matter how slim her chance of
victory might be. She would have to ensure Shampoo's
future, no matter what.

Letting her great-granddaughter sleep for now, Cologne sat
down to ponder the matters. For now, she had a dozen
questions, but no answers. She was, for example, very
curious to why the outsider hadn't used her magic when
Shampoo ambushed her in that village...

			* * *
			
Lina couldn't believe it. She simply couldn't believe it. Yes,
Ranma had told her what it was like, but hearing about
something like this was nothing compared to actually
witnessing it.

The sounds, the sights, the smells, the sheer _amount_ of
people. She hadn't been prepared to any of them. Next to
this, Zefilia had been nothing. Hell, even Atlas City had been
nothing compared to Xining. Lina just couldn't believe how...
BIG the city was.

The only bad thing about big cities was that even more stuff
cost money than before.

<Hey, where are you going, Lina?> Ranma asked. They, or
more accurately Lina, had been running around Xining like a
headless chicken. The young sorceress had tried to have a
look at everything, experience everything, and most
important of all, taste every possible food available. Now,
however, she was walking towards the less-reputable part of
the city.

<I... _we_ are broke, right?>

<Yeah, so?>

<I'm going to get some money.>

<How?>

Lina looked around. They definitely weren't in the better part
of the city. The houses around her were quite small, only one
or a few floors high, run down and quite dirty. Even if there
wasn't mud or animal droppings around, this was clearly a
slum. Lina smiled.

<There're bound to be all sorts of criminals around here,
right?> The young sorceress said, turning towards an alley.

<Yeah, probably,> Ranma answered. <What's that gotta do
with getting money?>

<I'm going to find a bandit, or a gang of bandits, you'll beat
them up and I'll collect their money. Ain't that a great plan, or
what?>

Ranma would have blinked if he could have. <You're going to
find some street trash, have me beat them up and take their
money?>

<Yup!> Lina smiled widely and entered the alley. It was dark,
foul-smelling, narrow, and apparently abandoned. She
shrugged and moved on.

<But... But... I can't use the Art for that!>

<Why not?>

<I can't go using martial arts for thievery! It wouldn't be
honourable!>

Lina's smile fell a little and she shook her head, bemused.
<Ranma, we're not going to steal anybody's money. We're
going to make the local constabulary a favour by getting rid
of a bunch of outlaws. If we're going to get some money out
of, it's just a bonus.>

<Do you believe that crap yourself?>

Lina blinked. <Of course! I...> She turned around the corner,
almost colliding with a large Chinese boy wearing quite dirty
clothes. <...don't have time for that now. You take over.> Lina
closed her eyes and gave over her body to Ranma.

			* * *

Ranma opened his eyes and looked around. There were five
youths in front of him, all of them wearing same style of
clothes. A quick peek from the corner if his eyes showed
three more who had appeared behind him.  None of them
carried themselves like a martial artist, so he shouldn't have
any problems trashing them.

Under normal circumstances, Ranma would have enjoyed
showing these scum what a martial artist could do. Now he
was bothered by the way he had ended up in this situation
and the motives, even if they were Lina's and not his, that
had brought him here. Technically, beating up muggers was
protecting the innocent and thus a honourable and good
thing to do. Seeking out criminals to beat up and rob was, in
Ranma's opinion, sinking down to their level.

None of these thoughts reached Ranma's conscious mind,
since he was quite busy keeping an eye on all the boys
surrounding him. Despite the situation and his reluctance for
being there, Ranma smirked. This should take about ten
seconds.

			* * *

The gang leader smirked. He had been prowling the alleys
with his boys, hoping to find something to occupy their time
when this foreign chick had appreared around the corner.
This was something you didn't see every day.

"Well, well, well. What brings you here, cutey?" He asked in
his best slick guy voice.

For a second the girl just stood there, her eyes closed. Then
she opened them, took a very quick look around and crossed
her arms over her chest. She also got this incredibly
arrogant smirk on her face.

It was like the chick wasn't afraid at all. The gang leader took
out his switchblade and stepped closer. He opened his
mouth, preparing to deliver another 'cool' line when the girl
blurred into motion.

First, she grabbed the thug's hand and twisted, making him
drop the knife. Then, still maintaining her grip on his arm, she
delivered a sharp kick to his stomach, followed by one to his
head. As consciousness rapidly left him, the thug heard his
boys shouting in both anger and pain as the girl went after
them.

			* * *

Little over ten seconds after grabbing the lead thug's arm,
Ranma delivered a quick axe kick to the last thug's head and
spun around, looking for other threats. There were none.

<Great work, Ranma!> Lina enthused. <Those bandits didn't
stand a chance!>

<Yeah, I know,> Ranma answered and turned to walk away.
<And we're outta here.>

<Hey! Ranma! Where are you going!?>

<Back to the hotel.>

<What! No! You can't do that! I haven't taken my loot yet!>

<I'm not going to let you steal their money, Lina.>

<Ranmaaa! Pleasee! It's not like they need the money!
They'd just use on some evil purpose!>

<No.>

<Pleaseeee!> Lina whined in her best whining voice. <I just
wanna sample a little more of the local cuisine! Is that so
evil?> She tried to put as much misery in her voice as she
could.

<N... No!>

<Pleeeeaasseeeee!!!>

<I... Uhh...> Ranma's resolve was quickly fading. He just
couldn't hearth making a girl miserable. Not even Lina. Not
even for such a stupid reason. <Argh! Okay. Take over the
body.> He finally said.

<Really?> Lina asked. <You'll let me take over?>

<Yeah.>

<Ya-hooo!> As soon as she was able, Lina took over the
body once more, dashed back to the alley and quickly
emptied the eight boys' pockets. She got herself enough for a
few more rounds in the local restaurants.

			* * *

Lina collapsed on her bed, giggling. Never in her life had she
seen so many new things, experienced so many new tastes
been in someplace so _different_ from what she was used to.

She had ran around like a little girl in a fair, trying to look at
everything, trying to take everything in, she just had to see it
all. It had been amazing. The future... present, whatever, she
hadn't believed it could be so different. And so much FUN.
Even if the city smelled even worse than the cities of old, in
Lina's mind that was a small price to pay. Everything was
new and shiny and different! And she... was so tired.

Exhausted by the day's events, Lina fell asleep.

Ranma took over the body and sighed. He, too, was weary.
Even if Ranma hadn't been in control of the body, he had
been in there all the time, forced to answer Lina's countless
questions. Trying to guide her away from the less reputable
establishments and places he really didn't want to
see (not that he had had much success...) and generally
acting as the more level-headed of the pair hadn't been easy
for him. Now, when he took over the body he got, on top of
the considerable mental fatigue the day had caused, the
physical fatigue of a body that'd been in a hyperactive mode
for untold hours.

Still, Ranma had trouble falling asleep. Today he had
witnessed a side of Lina he had never before had to see. She
had turned into a... naive little girl, for the lack of better term,
the minute she got into the city. It was hard to reconcile the
girl who had stared in wide-eyed wonder at everything
around her to the tomboy who had blasted Shampoo earlier
that day. It was like Lina had suddenly shifted mental gears
and became a completely different person.

It was scary.

			* * *

<Do we have to go?> Lina asked.

Ranma sighed and stopped packing. <How many times I
hafta tell you, me and pop are on a training trip! We ain't
gonna stay nowhere for long!>

<So you're going to let him lead, huh? What about if he
stumbles into another 'legendary training ground'? What're
you going to do then?>

<Look, Lina. Pop said we're gonna go home, to Japan. I'm
not gonna let him lead us to another place like Jusenkyou.>

<But couldn't we stay here for a while? Just a few days?>

<No.>

<Why?>

<I've had quite enough of China. I want to go home.>

<Ranma, pleaseee!>

<No.> Ranma resumed packing.

<Pleaseeee!>

<I'm not having this conversation.>

			* * *

Lina rubbed her aching posterior and tried to ignore Ranma's
sniggering. After they had left Xining a week ago, she had
been trying to find out just how much stronger, faster and
tougher she was. Unfortunately something seemed to be
interfering with her efforts. Her magic worked all right, but
every time she tried one of her old sword routines (with a
magically molded branch or something similar since she
didn't have her sword handy) something went wrong.
Routines that had been instinctive were impossible. She
knew what to do, but her body refused to respond, or, more
accurately, responded in odd ways. When she wanted to do
a simple slash, she ended up with some sort of weird half-
thrusting motion that would have left any halfway-competent
swordsman laughing. When she tried a thrust, she usually
dropped her sword. Lina didn't even want to start thinking
about her attempts at dodging.

"What the hell is wrong with me!!" The young sorceress cried
out. Near-by, Genma cringed and doubled his efforts at
playing with a tire.

Ranma snickered.

"It's not funnyyy!!" Lina screamed, tears starting to pour from
her eyes. Genma's play was turning a little frantic.

Ranma's mood plunged down immediately. <I... Uhh... Don't
cry, okay? I... Well, didn't mean it, and stuff, and... Uhhh...
please don't cry...> His lame attempts to calm the girl down
didn't seem to have any effect. <I... Err... I kinda might know
why you're having problems and stuff...>

Lina immediately stopped crying. <You do?>

<Uhh... Yeah. You're in my body, right?>

Lina nidded. <In theory, yes. It was your body that fell into
the Spring of the Drowned Girl.>

<So, I've been practising martial arts all my life, so, it's kinda
become instinctive for me. Now when you're in my body, it
tries to do Anything Goes, while you try to do those sword
forms.>

Lina blinked. It made sense. It actually was constant with a
few things she had read about switching bodies. <YES!
That's it! That's the answer! Ranma, I want you to teach me
how to do that martial arts thing of yours!>

Ranma winced, and then blinked. <You wanna learn martial
arts?>

Lina nodded again. <I don't really have a choice. As long as
I'm in your body, I have to learn to work with your reflexes.
After that, I should be able to use my sword forms _and_
your martial arts. Plus, since my... or actually your, body
already knows it, I should be able to learn it in no time!>

<Okay, if you say so. Good thing I mentioned it to you then.>

Lina's voice suddenly turned dangerous. <You knew about
this?>

<I... Uhh... suspected it for a while. Eheheheheh... Anyway, if
you want to learn Anything Goes, the first thing to do is...>

			* * *

Shampoo tried to keep her face impassive as Cologne
removed her bandages. It was hard, however, since she was
dreading to see what would be revealed underneath. Her
Great-grandmother had assured her that the burns would not
leave scarring, and Shampoo wanted to believe her, but the
burns had _hurt_.

Finally, Cologne removed the last wrappings from Shampoo's
left hand, poked the exposed limb a few times and leaned
back. "You can open your eyes now, Great-granddaughter."

Slowly Shampoo opened her eyes. The hand was a little
sensitive and more pink than usual, but aside from that,
there were no signs of burns. It had healed completely.

Shampoo let out a huge sigh of relief.

Chuckling, Cologne started removing the other bandages.
"Really, Great-granddaughter, you should have a little more
faith on my abilities."

"I'm sorry, Great-grandmother. I just couldn't believe anything
could heal me completely from that. The flames... It all..."

Cologne chuckled again. "The burns were never very bad. I
guess the spell the outsider used looked much more
impressive than it really was. At least from your perspective."

"If you say so Great-grandmother." Shampoo looked down to
the ground.

"Oh, don't worry, Great-granddaughter. We'll find them again.
And we'll restore your honour. But, for now, you need regain
your strength. I'll have to look at retraining you."

"Training, Great-grandmother? You know how to defeat the
outsider?"

Cologne sighed. "I'll be frank with you, Shampoo. I don't, at
least yet, know how to beat a sorceress. Before I know how
powerful and skilled she is, I cannot say much. And as for
training, you should know what to do after a major injury."
Cologne removed the last bandages from Shampoo's chest.
"Or have you forgotten the time you broke your leg?"

Shampoo smiled sadly and sat up. "I haven't, Great-
grandmother. What do you want me to do first?"

			* * *

That night Shampoo lay down next to the campfire and
watched Cologne cook up another feast from what they had
found while training. It had been an exhausting day, but
Shampoo was happy. She hadn't lost much of her edge, and
was positive that she'd be back in top condition in no time.
Then, when Great-grandmother had found a way to beat the
outsider's sorcery, she would restore her honour and return
to her rightful place in Jokentsuzoku. Shampoo sighed
contentedly and stretched.

Cologne looked up from her cooking. "Don't get too cocky,
Shampoo. This won't be an easy quest."

"I'm sure you'll find a way to defeat the outsider, Great-
grandmother."

"Oh, I will, _afte_r we've found her."

Shampoo blinked. "What do you mean, Great-grandmother?"

"Hasn't it crossed your mind that we the girl has over a
week's lead on us? When I was young that wouldn't have
meant that much, but nowadays she could have travelled
across the globe in that time."

Shampoo's good mood came crashing down. "Do you
mean..."

"No! We'll find her, Shampoo. It just might take a while,
depending on how fast and how far she has gone. But no
matter where she is, we'll find her." Cologne paused for a
moment to stir the soup she was tending. "After all, it isn't
hard to spot a girl travelling with a huge panda, is it?"

"And if she parts ways with the panda?"

"We'll find her still. I promise you that, Great-granddaughter."

			* * *

Ranma was in a quite bad mood. Genma had taken all their
money and run off to who knows where again, leaving
Ranma alone, broke and hungry. As if that hadn't been
enough, there had been a short, intense rain shower soon
after he had left their camp in search for something to eat,
leaving him wet, miserable and female. Well, maybe the
locals would be more inclined to help a hungry, wet and
miserable western girl than a hungry and miserable
Japanese boy.

"Stupid Pop, what does he think he's doing?" Ranma
mumbled to himself.

<Something stupid again, I bet. You now starting to see why I
think we'd be much better off without the old glutton?>

Ranma shook his head. <He's my pop, Lina. He's family. I
can't just leave him, no matter how stupid he is.>

<Why not? I left _my_ family as soon as I was old enough to
travel.>

<He's all I've got, OK? We've been travelling together as
long as I can remember, you know. I can't just pack my things
and leave him.>

Lina sighed. <Okay, I admit he isn't as bad as my sister used
to be, but I still can't see why you insist staying with him. I
wouldn't be surprised if he'd show up, with a lynch mob hot
on his heels.>

<He's family.> Ranma answered. <I can't abandon him.>

Lina shut up. Ranma was a stubborn person and there were
a few things he wouldn't bulge upon. It was better to save her
energy for something else.

Ranma trudged on. Hopefully, he'd soon come across some
food. He wasn't nearly as big an eater as Lina, but he still got
hungry. Unfortunately, Ranma didn't see anything he could
eat, unless you count grass or the rice in the rice fields.
Too bad neither was an option.

Suddenly Ranma spotted commotion ahead. Two people,
one of them carrying a large bowl of something and running
away from the second, were coming towards him. The
second guy was shouting something and shaking his fist and
the first, who was occasionally glancing back over his
shoulder at the second.

<What's that?>

If she could have, Lina would have shrugged her shoulders.
<Beat's me.>

For a minute, Ranma looked at the pair. Yup, the first guy
was definitely running away from the second guy, who in turn
was chasing the first guy. That's funny, they both appear to
be bald. Hmm... The first guy had a bowl. What did people
usually keep in bowls...

As the first guy ran by him, the young martial artist tripped
him and snatched the bowl, which was full of soup of some
sort. Using the Saotome swift eating technique, Ranma dug
in.

Lina caught a wiff of the soup's scent. The aroma was
fleetingly familiar, but she couldn't connect it to anything.
Then again, most foods smelt familiar to her.

The second guy, an old Chinese man with a bald head and
lots of wrinkles, stopped when he saw this, and shouted
something in Chinese.

Gulping down the last of the soup, Ranma looked at him.
After a moment he blushed and started laughing nervously.
"I'm.. Uhh.. sorry. It was good soup, really," Ranma finally
said in Japanese.

<Now who's the thief?>

<I was hungry, OK?>

The old guy stopped his ranting and looked at Ranma. He
especially seemed to pay attention to the young boy-turned-
girl's chest. Finally, he poked Ranma's breast. "You are a
girl, yes?" he asked in shaky Japanese.

<Yes, yes, YES! I AM A GIRL, DAMMIT!>

Wincing from Lina's rant, Ranma answered distractedly.
"Yeah, I am. Uhh, I mean..."

The old man let out a huge sigh of relief. "Good. It very bad if
a boy have eaten dragon's hair soup."

Ranma sweated a little and grabbed the old man by the
collar. "What do you mean!?"

"Ahh... Umm... You eat dragon's hair soup. Cures baldness,
but makes hair grow rapidly if has hair and eat. Not work on
womans, you woman, you not affected."

If she could have, Lina would have blinked. <So that's it!>

<What's what!?> an angry and anxious Ranma asked.

<That soup! That's why it was so familiar!>

<You... You know that stuff?>

<Yeah! It's a common cure for baldness. Well, was common
anyway.>

"So, did this guy tell the truth?" Ranma asked, slipping to
speak out aloud.

<Yeah. But don't speak, okay?>

<So my hair's gonna grow?>

Ranma could feel Lina smirking. <I'm afraid so,> the young
sorceress said.

<How do I cure it!?> Ranma shook the old man, who by now
was somewhat anxious, for emphasis.

<Hey! Don't yell at me, moron!>

<Craz...>  Ranma shook his head, trying to calm down. <How
do I cure It?> He asked, clenching his teeth, forcing himself
to be calm.

Lina sighed. <Ask if the guy has another dragon's hair. If he
has, use it to braid your hair. That'll keep it from growing.>

<And if he doesn't?>

<Stay female.>

Ranma shook the Chinese fellow around some more and
sneered. "You got another dragon's hair, old man?"

"I... Uhh... Yes, I have one."

"Give it to me!"

"Ahh... Umm.. Why? You girl, you no need..."

Using his free hand, Ranma took the soup bowl and poured
the little what remained of the broth over himself. Immediately
his hair started growing at an enormous rate.

"Give it to me!!"

"Uhh.. Here!" The old man quickly dug small pouch out of his
pocket. He fumbled around a little while opening it, but soon
was able to produce a think hair.

Ranma snatched the hair out of the old man's hands, and
used it to tie his hair in place. The nearly two meter long
braid looked _quite_ ridiculous.

Ranma grabbed the old man again. "You got scissors?"

The man nodded.

			* * *

Late that night Genma finally found his way back to the
Saotome's camp. He wore a quite self-satisfied smile on his
face. He also carried a large bag full of groceries.

"What's so funny, old man?" Ranma asked from where he
had been practising his martial arts forms. His pigtail was
now about as long as his ponytail had been.

Genma looked at his son and blinked. "A new look?"

"I don't wanna talk about it, okay?"

"Right..."

"Where did you get that food?"

"Ah, son." Genma began, smiling once again. "The goddess
of luck has truly smiled upon us today." Now he almost had
tears in his eyes. "There was a grand rooster fight
tournament in a near-by village, and I was fortunate  enough
to bet on the winning animal! We now have enough money to
last for long!"

"Oh, that's good. So, we're gonna eat now, right?"

Genma nodded vigorously and Ranma returned to his
practice. Unaware of each other, they both sighed in relief.

			* * *

Nineteen out of the twenty fighting roosters that had survived
the tournament died during the next forty-eight hours from
poisoning. The owner of the last surviving rooster got the
blame, was stripped of his title and banned from the
International Rooster Battle League's competitions for life.

The man, a professional fighting rooster breeder, swore
revenge upon the panda he had spotted near the rooster
pens before the competition began. Somehow he knew it just
had to be the animal's fault. The sign reading, "Don't mind
me, I'm just a panda," was a big tip-off...

			* * *

A few days later, on a bus station in the city of Lanzhou,
Genma was having some hard time. The attendant, an
approximately hundred year old woman, didn't speak
Japanese, seemed to have trouble with Chinese and was
apparently  deaf. "So, it number twenty goes to Xi'an?"
Genma asked in shaky Chinese, quite loudly.

"Whaat?" The old woman adjusted her hearing horn.

"I SAID: NUMBER TWENTY GOES TO XI'AN!!?" Genma
shouted.

"It goes?" The old woman asked. "Oh dear, I didn't know they
had changed that. Wait, I must check this with the
manager."

In defeat, Genma buried his head in his hands and sobbed.

Two hours later, Genma walked out of the building, holding
two tickets to bus number twenty two. It was raining outside,
so he was instantly turned into a panda. Neither fact
registered with the exhausted man.

			* * *

Leaning against the window, Lina stared out of the bus.
She tried to ignore the stares everybody was aiming at her. It
was, however, nearly impossible as practically everybody in
the bus was staring at her and her snoring... companion and
talking amongst themselves.

A young westerner girl travelling apparently on her own
would have caused some attention in these parts of the
People's Republic of China. A young girl travelling with an
apparently intelligent panda who communicated via signs
drew ridiculous amounts of attention anywhere she went.
Lina would have been much happier if the old moron would
have had the decency of turning back to his real form before
boarding the bus. But noooo, he just had to be lazy and stay
a panda. Jerk. Moron.

<Hey! I didn't do nothing!> Ranma suddenly said.

Lina blinked and jerked upright. She hadn't realised she was
thinking out aloud. <Sorry, I meant your pop, not you.>

<What did he do this time, then?>

<Can't you see that everybody's staring at us!?>

<Ummm, yeah. So what?>

<So what? What do you mean 'so what'!? It's irritating! If the
moron would just have turned into a human we could have
avoided this!>

<Hey, it's not my fault he's lazy! Don't start yelling at me you
crazy chick!>

<Who are y...> Lina grit her teeth and counted to ten. When
that didn't help she continued to twenty. She wouldn't get
mad. It would just lead into another pointless argument. She
wouldn't get mad. It would just...

Ranma did the mental equivalent of a blink when Lina's reply
was suddenly cut short. Had something happened to her?

<Lina? Are you all right?>

Lina let out a long sigh. <I'm fine, thanks. Thanks so much for
your concern.> She turned back to the window. The idiot
hadn't probably even realised what he had almost caused.
Lina didn't want to totally lose her temper again. What had
happened back the day they arrived in Xining had been quite
enough.

			* * *

Glancing back at the oddest occupants of his bus, driver
Woo Haifeng wondered if the westerner was some sort of
circus performer. And if she was, why was she going to a
village in the middle of nowhere?

And what were those logs doing in the middle of the
road!!!!??

Woo Haifeng stamped hard on the brakes, praying for the old
machine to work just once more.

			* * *

The occupants of the bus were thrown into  chaos, as the
vehicle suddenly screeched into halt. Lina hit her head rather
hard to the back of the seat in front of her while Genma
crashed the seat in front of him. He caused  the seat's
occupant, who luckily wasn't a child, mother or elderly, quite
a lot of pain but no permanent injuries.

Rubbing her head, Lina surged to her feet. "What the heck
was that!?"

<Don't ask me!>

<I didn't!> Lina shot back, and climbed over the still-dazed
panda.

<Hey! What was that for!?>

"We don't have time to argue now!" Lina shouted out aloud.
Lucky for her, nobody took any notice of it, since practically
everybody was crying out, either in pain, fear or anger. Well,
they probably wouldn't have understood with her using
Japanese and all...

A quick look around the van showed that almost everybody
had been thrown off their seats, and most people were
injured, disoriented or both. The driver was slumped over the
wheel.

Woo Haifeng was busy trying to regain his breath. He hated
when this happened. Even if he didn't have anything valuable
to steal, it was still annoying when all the passengers would
blame this on him.

Lina made her way to the front of the bus to see what had
caused the sudden stop.

<Well, well, some logs blocking the road. Isn't this
convenient...> Lina mused with a smile.

<What do you mean?>

Lina cracked her knuckles. <Exercise.>

			* * *

The Dragon's Fangs bandit gang weren't the first, and were
far from the biggest, most dangerous or famous group of
thieves to use that name. Still Shao-to, leader of the
Dragon's Fangs, hadn't hesitated when choosing that name.
It had a nice ring to it, and was somehow familiar.

Shao-to was a bit short, maybe a hundred and fifty five
centimetres or so tall. He was, however, a burly man and bit
on the fat size, which added a lot to his presence. Combined
with his leather vest, broad face and unruly beard he looked
more like a classic bandit out of a fairy tale than a modern
thug.  But, even if he looked like a bandit of the old age, he
could use an AK-47 just as well as anyone.

Shao-to looked at his men, all twelve of them, and smiled.
They were all good men, experienced bandits whoknew to
keep their guard up. There wasn't much pickings on these
backwater roads that led to small villages. But, by choosing
targets carefully, a small group of bandits could live fairly well
without having to fear retribution from either the main PRC
government or the more-or-less autonomous warlords and
weird villages full of powerful fighters that ruled large parts of
the far reaches of China.

"OK, lets go." Shao-to stood up from his hiding place behind
a conveniently placed boulder and led his men towards the
bus.

			* * *

There were a dozen men coming towards the bus. It was time
to have a little fun. Lina opened the door of the bus and
confidently stepped outside. Suddenly there was a sound,
like a sharp thunder or a miniature fireball, and several
somethings struck the ground in front of her. Lina stumbled
back and fell down. <What was that!!??>

<They've got guns!> Ranma said, alarmed.

<Guns?>

<Modern weapons that shoot bullets really fast!>

<Bullets?>

<Uhh... Little pieces of lead.>

Lina started sweating. Lead was a metal. A fairly heavy
metal. This could be bad. <How fast?>

<Fast enough to kill a man.>

Lina looked out. The bandits weren't coming in one group,
but had spread out quite a lot. There was no way she could
take out more than two them with one spell in the condition
she was in, and if any of them would get a chance to use
those 'guns'... <Uh-oh...>

<Yeah,> Ranma answered. <And they've got those,
whatchacallit, auto-weapons too. Those can fire several
bullets in a second.>

<And they're pointing them to this direction. Does that mean
they're ready to use them?> Lina asked.

<Yeah.>

Lina started sweating hard.. <I think... I think we'd better wait
and see what happens.> She was outnumbered, weak and a
prefect target where she sat. And those guns sounded a bit
scary.

Back in where he was sitting, Genma was sweating. Martial
arts was one thing, and a master martial artist could take out
dozens of opponents, but going against gunmen was always
risky. An unarmed fighter had to be lucky all the time, while a
gun-wielding opponent needed only to be lucky once.

Hopefully these bandits wouldn't be interested in a panda.

			* * *

Shao-to had been quite surprised by what he had found. In
addition to the normal travellers there had been a redhead
westerner girl and a panda that apparently belonged to the
girl in the bus. In his twelve years as a bandit, Shao-to had
never seen anything even remotely like this. He motioned for
A-do, the only one of his men who spoke the westerners'
tongue, to come.

"Ask her about the panda," Shao-to ordered.

Nodding, A-do went to question the girl, and Shao-to
continued to watch how his men stripped the locals of their
valuables. It seemed like they would get a good amount of
loot this time...

"Uhh... boss?"

Shao-to turned to face whoever had interrupted his thoughts.
"Yes, what is it Fa-mei?"

"What are we going to do with the panda?"

Shao-to blinked. "What about the panda?"

"Well," Fa-mei faltered, shuffling his feet just a little, "pandas
are kinda endangered species."

"So...?"

"So... So..." Now Fa-mei was visibly shuffling his feet. "So I
think we kinda should do something about it. You know, I
figure we can't just let the girl just have it or something..."

Shao-to raised an eyebrow. "Are you suggesting we take the
panda as loot?"

"Uhh... nonononono," Fa-mei answered. "I just kinda figured
we'd have a... moral obligation of making sure the panda gets
back to where pandas live or something. You know, to make
sure they don't go extinct."

There was a long pause.

"Please, boss, don't look at me that way. Just because I'm a
hardened bandit doesn't mean I can't be concerned about
endangered species!"

"Boss?"

Shao-to turned to face A-do. "Yes?"

"If I understood the girl right, the panda is hers, just like the
other passengers said."

Shao-to looked at the westerner girl. She was by far the most
composed of the bus' occupants. Excluding the driver that is,
but this was at least the third time Shao-to had robbed a bus
driven by that particular fellow.

"So what do we do, boss?" Fa-mei asked.

For a long while Shao-to was silent. There was something
about redheads that both frightened and angered him.
Sometimes he'd wake up from a nightmare and the only
things he'd remember were red hair and intense heat. He
disliked those dreams a lot. He also disliked red hair a lot.

Oh, well. "We'll take the panda. And the girl. Tie her up and
blindfold her and somebody find a leash for the animal."

			* * *

<What are we going to do, Lina?> Ranma asked. The
situation they were in... concerned him a little. He wasn't
afraid, of course, but still a little anxious. Ranma disliked
guns, even if he didn't know a lot about them, and people
who used guns.

<I'm still working on it. Do you think you could take them
out?>

There was a long silence.

<Well?>

Another silence. Finally...

<It'd be... hard. They having guns and all that, you know.
How about you?>

<I dunno, in the condition I'm in. And there're bystanders
here too. Maybe when they leave we can follow them to their
hideout and surprise them there.>

<Sounds good to me.>

Just then Lina noticed that two bandits, the one who had
questioned her in really odd English and one other were
coming her way. The other bandit was taking out some rope.
Lina started sweating.

<Uh-oh...>

The first bandit pointed his gun at her while the second, the
one holding the rope, took hold of her hands.

"Hey, what are you think you're doing!?"

"Quiet, girl, we take you." The one guarding her said.

"Hey, watch it with them ropes, you're.."

"Quiet!" The guard said, showing his rifle a little closer.

Lina sweated more.

<What do we do _now_?> Ranma asked, alarmed.

<I'll, uhh... think of something!>

			* * *

Woo Haifeng scratched his head as he watched the bandits
lead the girl and the panda away. He was damned if he knew
what went around in that bandit boss's head.

"So what do we do now?" one of he passengers asked from
the world at large.

"Clear the logs, I guess." Woo answered.

"And the girl?" somebody said.

"Isn't my problem. We tell the authorities and they can decide
what to do to her."

			* * *

The blindfold and ropes were quickly removed, and Lina was
showed into a small cell. The door was slammed shut with a
loud bang. Lina shot an icy glare at the door, but didn't say
anything.

<Great, what now?> Ranma asked. Lina's indecisiveness
had landed them in serious hot water this time. They had
been captured by the bandits, put into a cramped cell in the
middle of nowhere, and the walls looked pretty tough. He
could probably break them, if they weren't underground that
is, but didn't know where to go from there. In Ranma's
opinion this sucked big time.

Lina lay down on the moderately dry pile of hay that had
been placed to one corner of the cell. <Wait for the dark.>

<Oh, and then?> Ranma asked, more than a bit of sarcasm
in his voice.

<Blast 'em good. We're in their camp, where they'll be more
relaxed, we got surprise on our side, and I don't have to take
them all on at the same time. I figure I got much better
chances here.>

<Yeah, and what if there's fifty, or more of them here?>

<There isn't. There were twelve of them attacking the bus, so
there probably wasn't more than two or three left to guard the
camp.>

<How do you know?>

<They didn't call me bandit killer for nothing. I know how
bandits think. We'd better get some sleep now.>

			* * *
----------
Jussi Nikander
Jussi.Nikander@alien.nixu.fi