Ranma groaned. "How'd my life ever get this screwed up?"

  Cologne smiled enigmatically. "I can only guess," she said, softly.

***

  A relatively short eternity ago in a universe far, far way yet in
another sense quite close...

  "An old amazon artifact?" Ataru said suspiciously. "And it's going to
give me three wishes?"

  Cologne bapped him over the head with her staff. "Yes, and if you ask
one more time, I'll change my mind and take it back."

  "Whatever, old ghoul," the young pervert told her. "I just wonder why
you're giving it me."

  The matriarch sighed. "I just want you to stop pestering my great-
granddaughter. You've been all over her ever since we came here from
China, and we haven't been able to stop you even with our combined
skills. I've had this stowed away for emergencies, but I figured if you
get whatever you want maybe you'll stop pestering *us*."

  "Sure, sure." He made shooing motions. "Now get going so I can make
my wishes." Apparently, the boy had decided her intentions were genuine,
which, actually, they were. Cologne had tried *everything* but the boy
seemed to have an unstoppable good luck, at least in their case.

  "Let's see..." Ataru muttered to himself when she'd left. At first, he'd
just planned to wish for three of the girls, but then he realized he could
accomplish what he wanted with just a single wish and have two over for
other stuff. "I wish I had several beatiful girls wanting to marry me -
normal, human girls, not alien freaks." That should take care of his most
important worry. "I wish I was a cool, powerful, confident martial artist."
That, really, was all the boy needed for a perfect life. What more?

  "WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW?" his mother's irritated voice came from below.

  Ahwell, why not? "I wish I was born to some other parents."

  The last wish uttered, the ring emitted a warm, red glow...

***

  ...and in yet another universe, this one actually quite far from the
first two, yet not wholly unconnected, a female artist rubbed her hands.
Her new idea would hopefully earn her a *lot* of money, though she felt
little hope of reaching the popularity of her previous work...

***

...and in the same universe but at a somewhat different time, a lazy
fanfic-author jotted down some apologies at the end of his latest spamfic.
No, I haven't released anything for waaaay too long; work has been
sapping more of my strength that I expected, and I've also been busy with
other stuff. I'm sorry, but at current rates, I probably won't finish
anything befor the end of July, with the possible exception of NEY 7.
Especially now that FF7pc is out...

  I'm sorry if I managed to botch up characterization; I have neither
seen nor read any UY.

  Oh, and by the way, if anyone wants to preread my stuff (yeah right, in
my dreams), feel welcome to peek in at the webpage occasionally, since I
usually upload unfinished versions of fics - or tell me and I'll be
delighted to start sending 'em to you.


---
Ronny Hedin, thark@swipnet.se, http://nabiki.newberry.edu/thark/
        "So, they aren't extraterrestials?"
        "Nope, they're manga characters who've lost their hair."
        (the unexpected end of X-files)