Pat Olsen <tagan1@pacbell.net> wrote:

Like, Dislike, have a great idea that needs sharing?  Please send it to
me!

I liked the story itself. But the writing really felt rushed. The prose
was sometimes clumsy and unclear, and it was full of errors in spelling,
punctuation, etc., especially toward the end. The most frequent of these
was the mix-up of your ("belonging to you") and you're ("you are");
also, a 's ending on a word indicated a possessive; plurals generally
just add an s.

So my advice would be to slow down and do some careful editing. If you
need more help, let me know and I'll be more explicit about where the
problems are.


Gary Kleppe
http://www.execpc.com/~kleppe/comics