i wrote this spamfic somtime ago making fun of AMG self-inserts, i think
it's time to repost it. 
insert standerd disclaimer

Hi all!  I know I said I don�t write but I just couldn�t get this outta my
head so I decided to try anyhow.  This will be my frist attemp at
fanficion( or any type of writing) so please be gentle.  C&C is welcome,
FLAMES shall be returned to sender, along with a 5O Megaton nuclear bomb
that I bought from Better Bombs and Blasters INC. �Have a nice Apocalypse�.
 And now, on with the fic.

Legend:
<~> =Thoughts

	<What is going on here!!?!> I thought in amazment. <One minute, I�m on the
sofa �bout ta call my best friend, the next, I hear this goffy message
about a goddess something or the other office and this GOREGOUS babe pops
out of the mirror in my hallway! Not that I obejet to having a pretty girl
around mind you , but, I WANNA KNOW WHATS UP!>
	
	�Hello there, are you Jason Smith?� she asks.
	
	�Umm, ya�
	
	�Great, I�m Belldandy, the goddess of the present.  I�ve been sent here to
grant you one wish.�

	To say I was Stupified would be like saying water is wet.  �Uhhh,�  <wake
up you idiot! There�s a beautfil woman standing right in front of you and
you do nothing about it!!?!> I mentaly screemed at myself.
	
	�I�ve been sent here by the goddess relief office to grant you one wish. 
And could you please hurry?  I�ve got a date with my boyfriend soon.�

	My brain finally catching up with the rest of me �You can do that?�

	�Yes, I�m a very powerful goddess�

	�Wow, wish I had that kind of power,� I said wistfuly.  Now that I look
back I WISH I never said that.

	With that a pure white light desended from the heavens draging a
protesting goddess up into it.

	�Hey! Whats goning on here? This isn�t suppose to hap...�

	The light then flashed out, leaveing behind a VERY wide-eyed goddess.

	�W-wish... accepted,� she said breathlessly, right before she fainted. 
Convlusing every few seconds on the floor.

* * *

	10 years later...

	�WHAT DO YOU MEAN KAMI-SAMA BLAMES ME!  It�s not my fault he broke his leg
tripping on the stairs.

	I winced at the volume as Charles (god of Butlers) chewed me out from the
other side of the line.

	�It�s his fault then for making me the god of accidents!  I don�t
authorize every accident, bugs do most of that and I am not responsible for
bugs.�

	<Oh, yes, this sucks.  Even with the power, being the god of accidents is
not a good job, or a thankful one.  In the line of duty I�ve made billions
of mortal enemys and hundreds of immortal ones.  Every time somthing goes
wrong everyone blames me, even when it�s obvious that they themselfs are to
blame.  Oh yes, life just ain�t good to me.>

	An hour later I was still arguing with Charles.

* * *

	Well there it is!  Howed you like it?  I know Belldandy might be a little
out of character, but so what!?  Shes only minor character in the fic.  And
despite what you may think this isn�t an insertion fic, you think i�d give
MYSELF such a nasty job?  I don�t think so.  And yes, I know the name
�Jason Smith� sucks, hey I never was good at names so sue me.  Thanks for
reading this!
	Mark Premo