Subject: Re: [FFML] [Fanfic][Ranma] Blonde 1/2 Volume 1
From: "Ace Sanchez" <deadlysilent@hotmail.com>
Date: 6/19/1998, 4:47 AM
To: ffml@fanfic.com



>From mgcampb@clemson.edu Thu Jun 18 00:12:05 1998
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Date: Thu, 18 Jun 1998 03:14:04 -0400
From: Matthew Campbell <mgcampb@CLEMSON.EDU>
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To: Ace Sanchez <deadlysilent@hotmail.com>
Subject: Re: [FFML] [Fanfic][Ranma] Blonde 1/2 Volume 1
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Ace Sanchez wrote:

Ace Sanchez (email: jsa@fl.net.au,  WWW: http://jsa.users.fl.net.au/)

My first fic, published or otherwise. Please be gentle (Pretty 
please?)

Yes, it is an alternate reality / parody fic. These are my fave types
for some reason. So I thought I'd write my own.

Hey man, thanx for the input!

As you can tell I am a first time author. I'll try to listen to your 
opinions. It's just that it was kind of meant to be close to the 
original, well ... coz the original is still my fave! heh. I loved the 
table hitting part so it had to go in there :-). But rest assured, as 
you can tell in the later stages of part 2 things are getting a little 
different ... you'll just have to wait and see :-)

About the bisexual thing ... I wasn't decided on whether I should put 
that kind of stuff in my fic. Some people might not like it. What do you 
guys think?

anyways, seeyas!

Ace Sanchez




You've fallen into a common error with alternate reality fics.  You're 
retelling far too much of the original story.  I didn't really need to 
read about Soun telling his daughters about the engagement.  I didn't 
need to read about the first Ranma/Akane sparring match.

You've written everything as if assuming the reader has never heard of 
Ranma 1/2 before.  The thing is, this is a fanfic.  It's OK to skip 
over 
stuff that most readers will already know.  That said.....

I think you have an interesting premise.  A Ranma who is the most 
beautiful woman on earth in female form.  However, I think you're 
making 
too much the same.  The school situation was the first real change.

For example, they say everyone is a little bisexual.  If Ranma is 
really 
such a stunning girl, it might have been interesting to see one of the 
Tendo sisters be just a little attracted.

Also, make sure Akane and Ranma's relationship is not just a replay of 
the "normal" series.  I actually expected her _not_ to hit him with the 
table this time.  After all, saying his female form was better looking 
than her is just so obviously true, she wouldn't have as much reason to 
get mad.  Instead she reacted the same way, and same old, same old.  
You 
need to make sure both guys _and_ girls treat Ranma differently.

-- 

Matthew Campbell 
E-mail me at mgcampb@clemson.edu

"Well, Igor.....
You broke into my laboratory, when I told you not to;
you took something that didn't belong to you;
and you nearly got us all killed.
What do you have to say for yourself?"



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