Help me... heeeeeelp meeeeeeeee...

Disclaimer: Ranma 1/2 and the spoofed commercials are copyrights of their
respective creators and are used without permission.

Blah blah camera directions babble blah, blah babble punch line [].

*****

[Open on a shot of Dr. Tofu in the kitchen of the Tendo Dojo. A frying pan
is sizzling away on the stove.]

Dr. Tofu: Okay... last time.

[Dr. Tofu flips an omelet from the pan onto a plate and holds it out towards
the camera.]

Dr. Tofu: This is your brain.

[Dr. Tofu carries the plate into the dining room of the dojo, where a hungry
panda-Genma is seated at the table. Dr. Tofu gestures to Genma.]

Dr. Tofu: This is formula 552.

[Dr. Tofu puts the plate down in front of Genma, who eats the omelet in a
single bite. Dr. Tofu picks the plate up again, holding it so that we can
see it's empty except for a few grease spots.]

Dr. Tofu: This is your brain on formula 552.

[Dr. Tofu puts down the plate, and the screen slowly fades to white.]

Dr. Tofu (v.o.): Any questions?

[A black caption fades in at the bottom of the screen.]

CAPTION: Brought to you by the Partnership for a Shampoo-Free Nerima.

Shampoo (o.s.): You not send Shampoo home without Airen!

Cologne (o.s.): I think they're talking about the other kind of shampoo,
great-granddaughter.

Shampoo (o.s.): Oh. So exploding ramen delivery was too much, yes?

Cologne (o.s., pained): You might say that...

[Fade to black.]

*****

I need professional help...

--G. Falconar