The black limousine rolled down the freeway surrounded by lesser
vehicles, a wolf among sheep.  Its occupants, all female, spoke softly
to one another. 
	"Sit up straight.  No slouching."
	"H... hai."
	"That's better.  I may have to bring you along, but I won't let you
disgrace me or the corporation.  Is that clear?" 
	"Hai, Mama-san.  I promise I'll do my best."
	"Do better than that. The oldest and most prestigious families in all
of Tokyo will be there, and it will be a great priviledge for you to
attend.  If you embarrass me..." 
	The driver cleared her throat.  "We are approaching our destination, my
Lady." 
	"Good."  She glanced at her companion.  "Remember.  Whatever happens,
you must remain on your best behaviour.  Do you understand me?" 
	The girl nodded solemnly as the limo eased gracefully to a stop. 
"Hai." 

	The young man, dressed in an impeccably tailored tuxedo, wandered
through the crowd of young socialites with an expression of intense
boredom.  This had been a mistake, as he'd known it would be.  Oh, he'd
been approached by many of the young women milling about, and he had to
admit that some of them were rather pretty, in their way... but they
just couldn't compare. 
	He wouldn't date with any of them.
	He walked over to a table bearing a large punch bowl, and served
himself before turning around and gazing at the laughing, flirting,
dancing youths before him.  "How distasteful," he said quietly. "Such
clamor and bustle deeply offends the true warrior's soul, which yearns
to be tranquil and alert."  He leaned against the table.  "Be there no
sign of them?" 
	The table replied, "No, Master."
	"A pity.  No doubt they have been set upon by some foul fiend or
another, preventing them from being at my side."  He clenched his fist,
and with surprising foresight made sure it wasn't the hand holding the
glass of punch.  "Would that I could be with them in their time of
need!  Yet familial duty requires my presence here." 
	The table shifted a bit, as if there was someone underneath it.  "Yes,
Master." 
	The young man's attention was attracted by a peal of high-pitched
laughter from within the crowd.  "And what of my sister?  Doth she
behave herself?" 
	"Well, she hasn't poisoned anyone yet, if that's what you mean." 
	"Remarkable restraint.  I'm sure she finds this as unpleasant as I
do."  His gaze travelled to a large, ornate clock set in one wall.  "How
much longer must we endure this mockery?" 
	The person under the table shifted the covering aside and looked at the
clock as well.  "Two more hours, Master.  The instructions were very
specific." 
	"Very well, then.  Though I'm sure nothing of interest will happen in
all that time." 

	The young girl gazed about at the assembled young people, unsure what
she should be doing.  It was her first time at such an event, and she
was nervous about breaking Mama-san's rules.  And it didn't help that
Mama-san had gone off to �talk business' with some of the older people,
leaving her alone.
	Well, not *exactly* alone - there was a crowd of young men around her,
which usually happened when she went out in public - but they weren't
much fun.  All they wanted to talk about was politics and theatre, and
all she wanted to talk about was fish.  It looked like it was going to
be a dull evening.

	And then, as if by magic, the crowd parted, and their eyes met.
	Kuno Tatewaki, more often known as just plain Kuno, and occasionally
'the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High', was unable to speak, gazing as he
was at the pink-haired girl.  *Truly,*  he thought, *it is a kind fate
that links my life to hers.  I can see she burns with the same fierce
passion as do I - she is destined to be mine, and I hers!* 
	Nastume Atsuko, originally NK-1124 and almost always called Nuku Nuku,
smiled politely at Kuno.  *I wonder if he wants to be my friend?* 


CATLING RIVALRY

CHAPTER ONE

	There was a Kuno-shaped hole in the landscape.
	Not literally, of course, though it had been known to happen.  This
time it was a more figurative hole - Kuno just wasn't there anymore. 
	Ranma was the first one to notice it.  Late for school (as usual), the
young martial artist was sprinting madly over the rooftops, trying to
get there before the first bell.  Of course, there were a few obstacles
in his way, but over the past few months they had become so predictable
that he barely had to even think about how to handle them. 
	*Okay,* he thought.  *Three houses down... jump past Ryoga's
umbrella...* A whirring circle of red passed right behind him.  *Across
the telephone wire... two more houses...  evade Moose's spikes of
death...*  Three iron needles shot through the air space that Ranma had
just vacated.  *Drop-kick Happosai...*  "AAAAAIIIIIEEE!!!" *Past these
trees... bounce off Kuno's face... and then...* 
	*WHAM!*
	Ranma's flight was suddenly interrupted by a brick wall.  He remained
pressed against it for a moment, his hands bearing the approved
two-finger "I am in serious pain" gesture, before gravity took notice
and pulled him to the ground. 
	He sat up, looking about in confusion.  "Wha... what happened?"  He ran
the last few moments over again in his mind.  The leaping... the
abscence of an expected foothold... the sudden pain. 
	He turned and looked up at the rooftops.  A dramatic figure in a blue
robe wielding a sword failed to appear.  His self-styled arch-rival
failed to stand above him, smiling down at him smugly and quoting bad
poetry.  Ranma scratched his head.  "Where's Kuno?" 


	Posed dramatically at the window of the highest room of the mansion,
Tatewaki Kuno stared out over the city of Tokyo.  "With simple grace," 
he quoted, "the untouched blossom, so pure, so innocent, is lifted by
the wind and transported to the shining stillness of the pond.  Yet in
its journey, though it knows not, it moves those who see it
immeasurably." 
	There was a brief silence, then a round of applause arose from a small
group of hired flunkies.  "Brilliant, Master Kuno!"  "Bravo!"  "Encore!
Encore!" 
	"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Kuno raged.  They stared at him, and he turned
his head away in contempt.  "You know it has to be louder than that." 
	"WOO HOO!" "Way to go, KUNO!" "Great stuff!"
	"Thank you, thank you.  One does what one can, of course."  A slight
motion from the shadows caught his attention.  "You may leave, cretins." 
	After they had bowed and scraped their way out, Kuno walked to the
window and gazed outwards.  "What news, loyal Sasuke?" 
	"Here, Master Kuno."  A small square of paper zipped through the air
toward Kuno, who caught it effortlessly as it passed him.  He glanced at
it, then surrendered all pretense of dignity to gape hungrily at the
image it presented. 
	"The wondrous pink-haired lass!"  It was quite a good photograph of
Nuku Nuku, taken in the soft light of dawn and displayed her, wrapped in
a filmy nightgown, asleep in a convenient sunbeam.  Kuno's hands
trembled as he stared avidly at this vision of loveliness.  "She is a
princess... a queen... a goddess!"  At length, and with some difficulty,
he composed himself.  "What have you learned of her?" 
	"She lives in downtown Tokyo with these two people."  Another picture
winged its way to Kuno, followed by another.  He studied them
impassively.  "The man is Natsume Kyusaku, husband to the Lady Akiko. 
The boy is Ryunosuke, their son.  I'm not sure what relationship Miss
Nuku Nuku has to them - she calls Kyusaku "Papa-san", though." 
	"Unimportant.  What else have you gleaned?"
	"Her 'aunt', Natsume Akiko..." Another picture crossed the room. 
"...is, of course, the president of the highly influential Mishima Heavy
Industries corporation.  Her two personal servants..." Two more photos
were sent to Kuno.  "...Arisa and Kyoko, act as bodyguards and, well,
slaves."  *Not unlike myself,* Sasuke thought in resignation. 
	Kuno cast the pictures aside without turning.  "Aught else?" 
	"Well, now that you mention it, Master Kuno...  She lives in this
house... and goes to this school... riding this bicycle... around this
neighborhood..."  The air was suddenly filled with photos, gliding with
astonishing accuracy across the room.  Kuno caught the first few, but
quickly became loaded down.  "...and here's a nice one of the Mishima
building... this is Mt. Fuji... oh, and here's a lovely picture of my
great aunt Mitsuki, on the porch of her summer home in..." 
	"ENOUGH!" Kuno threw the armload of photographs to the floor and
whirled around.  "You try my patience! Tell me... eh?" 
	For the first time, he noticed that the ninja was standing there in
tattered clothing, covered in soot and ashes.  Several bandages were
visible.  "Why, what happened to you, faithful Sasuke?" 
	Sasuke laughed, then winced in pain.  "Well, you see, Master Kuno..." 

	"KYUSAKU!"
	Sasuke cringed and turned around from his hiding spot on the Natsume's
balcony.  There was a large airplane-like vehicle, equipped with VTOL
engines, hovering only a few meters away.  The words POISON SEVEN were
stencilled on its side.  Sasuke backed up against the wall in surprise. 
He had heard the massive engines, certainly... he just hadn't believed
that the thing would actually be heading toward this particular
apartment. 
	The window he had been eavesdropping at suddenly slammed open. 
Kyusaku, a cigarette in his mouth, leaned out and shook his fist at the
plane.  "Will you give it up?!  People are trying to have breakfast
here!" 
	The speakers on the jet rang with feminine laughter.  "We could care
less, Natsume!  Give us Ryunosuke so we may return him to Our Lady, or
face the consequences!" 
	He ducked back inside, completely failing to notice Sasuke in his
clever ninja balcony disguise.  "Don't they ever get tired of this? 
Nuku Nuku!" 
	"Hai!"
	"Get Ryunosuke to school."  There was a metallic click.  "I've been
itching to try this baby out." 
	"What is that, 'To-chan?" a younger-sounding voice asked. 
	"Using my genius, I have created the perfect inertial amplifier. 
Summary: We'll be able to turn their own weapons against them!" 
	"Sugoi!  Papa-san is so smart!"
	"Naturally!"
	"KYUSAKU!"  The pilot of the jet sounded impatient.  "Give us the boy
or we'll open fire!" 
	Things were clearly getting out of hand.  Sasuke was giving serious
consideration to running for safety, when Kyusaku emerged again, a
high-tech rifle in his hand.  He aimed carefully at POISON SEVEN. 
	The laughter sounded once more.  "You're threatening us with that
little pop gun? Don't make me laugh!  Launch missile!"  A small cylinder
was fired from the jet, trailing smoke as it sped toward Kyusaku and
detonated against a nearby wall.  As a second missile fired, he pulled
the trigger on his invention; a shimmering blue beam struck the jet,
increasing the recoil caused by the emerging missile and thereby sending
POISON SEVEN tumbling back into the sky. 
	This was of little comfort to Sasuke, who had been on the receiving end
of that second missile. 

	"...but the doctor says I'll be back to normal in a jiffy." 
	"Very good.  Oh, and you'll be paying for the doctor's bill out of you
own pay, of course." 
	"But, Master... you don't pay me..."
	Kuno turned to look at him.  "Did you say something?" 
	Sasuke stared at his master a moment, then dropped his head.  "No,
sir." 
	"Good."  He began to pace the room.  "Now I must devise the perfect
method for renewing my acquaintance with the pink-haired lass.  Hmm... a
phone call?  Too mundane.  Flowers?  Perhaps, yet be there enough
flowers in the world to express my love for her?" 
	"Uh... Master?  If you don't mind my asking, what about Miss Akane and
the pig-tailed girl?" 
	Faint strains of ukulele music could be heard approaching from the
stairwell.  Kuno didn't pause in his pacing, other than to divert his
course toward a pull-rope suspended from the ceiling.  "Ah, faithful
Sasuke.  You of all people should know me better than that." 
	The ninja sighed.  "Yes, I suppose I should."
	"Call it a passing fancy if you must, but I must admit that the beauty
of the pink-haired lass has in truth captivated my very soul."  He
pulled the cord, and the music was abruptly cut off among the sound of a
large number of bowling balls being rolled down a flight of stairs. 
Kuno continued as if nothing had happened.  "In time, I shall wrest
Tendo Akane and the pig-tailed girl from the evil Saotome Ranma's
grasp.  Until then, there is enough love in my heart to emcompass all
three maidens, and cherish them equally!" 
	*And this also gives you time to heal from the constant pummelings
Ranma gives you,* Sasuke thought to himself a bit rebelliously. 
	Kuno returned to the window.  "For now, I must contemplate.  Let me
see... hand-written invitation delivered by bow and arrow?  Too
dangerous.  Bungee-jumping from a helicopter?  Mmm... no, I tried that
last week with the pig-tailed girl..." 
	Without warning, a well-tanned head popped through the window. 
Followed by a body, of course.  Still attached.  "Aloooooha, my Tacchi!" 
	Instinctively Kuno sliced downward with his bokken, which was
effortlessly blocked by his father's ukulele.  The kendoist glared at
the man in the garish shirt.  "How did you evade my cunning trap, you
swine?" 
	The elder Kuno laughed, his personal palm tree swaying with the
movement.  "Da big kahuna been roun' de block a few times, yeah!  And me
got a big job for my little Tacchi." 
	Kuno withdrew his bokken reluctantly and stepped back.  "Speak your
request and begone." 
	"We goan' have de big, important visitors to de island, and dey goan'
be bringin' da big money fo' de school, yeah!"  As he talked, Sasuke
cautiously peeked down the stairs, and saw the splintered remains of a
record player amidst the pile of bowling balls. 
	"And what, pray tell, does that have to do with me?"
	The principal grinned widely.  "You goan' meet dem at de train station,
and bring �em here.  Give dem de official escort, and de kine.  Den we
have da big luau!"
	Kuno turned away contemptfully.  "And why should I agree to such a...
menial task?  Send Kodachi, if an escort is required.  Gallivanting
about the town is her balliwick."
	"Cuz I know me Tacchi, and you be da charming one to de ladies, yeah. 
Mebbe dey give more money if dey like you!"
	Kuno paused, then turned back around.  "Ladies?"
	"Hooptah!  I t'ought dat might catch your ear."  The elder Kuno pulled
out a pineapple from his shirt and peered at a note tied to its fronds. 
"We got de lady Natsume Akiko, and her wahine, Atsuko."
	"Natsume?!"  Kuno grabbed the pineapple, his eyes bulging from his
head.  He read the note twice, three times, then looked at the sky with
tear-filled eyes.  "Oh, kindly fate!  To deliver the wondrous
pink-haired lass to my waiting arms!"  Lost in bliss, he hugged the
pineapple tightly to him.  "Fear not, my love... soon we shall be
together again, and for all time!"
	Sasuke watched with apprehension as the pineapple trembled under the
stress.  "Uh... Master?  Isn't that one of the exploding ones?"
	"What's that?" Kuno asked, a second too late.
	The next few seconds were filled with loud noises, flying shrapnel, and
the eternal words: "That hurt, you know."