ok, it's a 1st time story, and it's got some major problems.
worth a laugh or two, so it's here.
couldn't do the whole of part 2 in one section though.
based on characters and situations from Takahashi Rumiko, Fujishima Kosuke, 
and others.
	C&C welcome, send to Greggsharp@aol.com

PART 2: I DREAM OF KASUMI 

Kasumi watched the crackle of the fire and fingered the 
cross she often wore. The past few days had been even more
chaotic than the vast majority of times she had seen since 
Genma and his son had come to call a few short years ago.
	One set of disasters after another, and now this. She
had liked, really liked, Dr Tofu. Now she would never know
if that relationship would go any further. This latest in
the series of bizarre events had taken him from her, and
she was still feeling a bit numb from it all. She remembered
the little speech by Cologne.

	"This is all the fault of that damn ring," Cologne
managed as she wrung water out of her garment. It still
smelled like wet rat.
	"What ring?"
	Cologne looked up to see that everyone had immediately 
surrounded her, anxious for some explanation of what had
actually occurred here, and why now EVERYONE had some sort of
Juusenkyo curse.
	"The Ring Of Toltiir, an ancient ring of a forgotten god
of mischief, which was recently found by some adventurers and
brought back to the Amazon Village as a prize. It was sent on
to me for inspection, and was stolen recently with a number of my 
underthings."
	"AUUGGHHHH! I knew that couldn't have been Shampoo's lingerie
when I saw..." Happosai slowed down at the number of glares he was
getting. At least six of the people there were building up battle-
auras.
	"Meow!" Shampoo, permanently a cat due to two dunks in the same
water, protested that Happosai should have known since Shampoo didn't
wear a bra.
	"So this is YOUR fault!" Akane's ki summoned forth her mallet.
	"Once again," Nabiki snarled. "Now you've gotten me into
this Juusenkyo mess too."
	Kuno had been wanting to hit someone for quite some time,
and was overjoyed to have found a target. Ukyou felt the same way.

Kasumi had turned her attention elsewhere, though even Kasumi was
ready to do SOMETHING to the little old pervert. One should practice
forgiveness, it was true, and she'd always been very spiritual in 
nature- mere physical or monetary considerations being so ephemeral.
That didn't mean that deep down, on a purely visceral level, that
she didn't want to drop kick Happosai into the Spring Of Drowned 
Piglet the second time and then sell him to a pig farm.

	"As I was saying," Cologne said a few moments later. "Ranma
found the ring somehow and must have activated it while Akane was
yelling at him. The ring responded by placing us here."
	"It's some sort of wish ring, then?" Ryoga, permanently male
and human again, was feeling happier about Ranma than he had in
a very long time. Now, maybe he could pursue Akane (though her image
kept changing to Akari's in his mind.)
	"Yes, but more a _want_ ring. It takes whatever it perceives
you wanting, then comes up with a number of wishes that _might_ give
the desired result. Then the victim, I mean wielder of the ring, 
can choose one of the options and gain that particular wish."
	"But being the creation of a god of mischief, none of the 
results are going to work out." Nabiki nodded. "Figures."
	Kuno was still thinking about getting his hands on a 
working ring that granted wishes and missed this statement. Not
that he would have heeded the words anyway.
	"Looks like we're still not in the right world," a blonde
American in black jacket said as he lit a cigarette.
	"This sucks." This speaker had an Australian accent.
	"Well, I _did_ always want to meet Ukyou," said a burly
6'10" man with a soft Southern accent.
	"That reminds me," Cologne fixed the four men with a slitted
gaze. "Who are you?"
	The man in the black leather jacket tipped his sunglasses 
down slightly, revealing startling blue eyes. "Name is Shades,
I've been dimensionally wandering since I got sucked in by a really
weird webpage and spat out in El-Hazard. I'm the Priest Of Earth."
	"I'm Zen," said the Southerner.
	Another American, fairly muscular as well, gave a polite
half-bow. "I'm Dan. Me and Brad got here through a Cursed Deck of
Ani-mayhem cards. I ended up in King Kai's Bungalow."
	"I ended up in Washu's Lab," shrugged Brad. "Then Zen got ahold
of the deck and ended up in Florestica castle."
	"So we must have drawn 'Juusenkyo' this time." Dan continued.
	"That's what it looked like."
	"So now we're all travelling together, trying to find our way
home," Zen said, summing it all up. "Except now we've all got these
damn Juusenkyo curses too."

	Kasumi poked the fire with a stick, glancing over at 
the strange travelling companions. There were much fewer of 
them left. The Amazon Village had been the worst disaster.

	"We'll just stop here briefly, get supplies, and move on."
	"You may try," Cologne said with a puff on her pipe. "Neither
I nor Shampoo will continue on at this point. She has failed in her
duties, but has been punished by being permanently turned into a cat.
Mousse?"
	"I will remain here as well, I will devote my life to finding
a cure for Shampoo."
	Nobody was really surprised, but that was three down of the 
original group.
	The amazon village was primitive by some standards, which was
what got Tatewaki into trouble. A few comments about the poor primitive
barbarians, and he found himself challenged. Currently in male form,
he started raving about how he would allow the challenger to date with
him if she won.
	Kuno Tatewaki had been knocked down and was about to be dragged
off to a life of slavery when Tofu caught the eye of another villager.
	That was disaster for Kasumi, as the spear-carrying amazons
came rushing up to block anyone from helping Tofu. Unfortunately for
him, Tofu managed to hit the accupressure sleep spots on his first
opponent. Four others dragged him down and he was given the "kiss of
marriage" a few moments later.
	Konatsu, Sasuke, Principal Kuno, and the American known
as Dan met very similar fates in short order. (The first two becoming
slaves, Dan managed to get in a lucky punch and knocked out his 
opponent. Whether it was good luck or bad luck was mainly a matter
of perception. The Principal apparently tried to give a particularly
long-haired amazon a haircut, and had joined his son.

	Without much choice, they'd had to leave the village. Shortly 
after all this, Kodachi flew off, a black duck, trying to make it to
Japan under her own power.
	Nabiki realized that Kodachi wouldn't get there, and pointed
out that she was heading into the sunset. Ryouga got lost while 
crossing a stream. Tsubasa had hidden inside a garbage can in one of
the other villages, unfortunately discovering that the garbage was 
tossed into a magical spring of their own. 
	Somehow the idea of lugging a coldcast porcelain statue of
Tsubasa through the wilderness didn't appeal to anyone, and the 
general consensus was he'd end up a broken man.
	Eleven now were left.

C&C to Greggsharp@aol.com
http://members.aol.com/Metroanime/index.html