From: KLEPPE@execpc.com (Gary Kleppe)
To: ffml@fanfic.com
Cc: Cindy Toler <yoiko@earthlink.net>
Subject: [FFML] [Ranma][Fanfic] Cat's Prey
Date: Tue, 28 Apr 1998 12:43:40 GMT

	This story owes its inspiration to a couple of other fanfics;
which ones these are will be revealed in the end notes, as it would 

give

away spoilers to tell you now. You don't need to have read these 

stories

to understand this story; all you need is a basic familiarity with 

Ranma

1/2 canon.

	Some of you may find this a bit dark. Some of you may find it
more than a bit dark. You have been warned.

	As always, C&C (including MSTs or any other form) is welcome and
greatly appreciated, and I prefer on-list responses so that they can be
cross-discussed by other readers. I do recommend you read the whole
story first, as some things that might seem OOC get explained later.

   Oh.  My.  You know, I *was* going to chew you out for putting this 
out instead of HaM (and never mind about how I'm giving this feedback 
instead of working on Illuminations--this is your procrastination we're 
discussing, here), but once again, I've been so blown away by your 
writing that I absolutely cannot find it in my heart to be mad at you.  
Even if you did do something to Akane that even you admit is one of the 
nastiest things you can imagine....

   Now, you wanted some feedback on the ending.  Well, my main response 
was, "Why?"  Not, "Why did you do this to Akane and Ranma?", but "Why 
did you end the story here?".  I guess the problem I have with it is 
that you've declared every other character in the series to be utterly 
powerless in this matter.  Between Happi and Cologne, someone should 
know something about the Shadowcat.  From there, it's a short jump to 
action.  Possibly futile action, perhaps fatally disastrous action, but 
action nonetheless.
 
   Particularly with the way you wrote the ending, there seems to be a 
strong likelihood that there is some gap in Akane's mind where her 
consciousness could be reinstalled, if it were returned.  Then 
logically, the rest of the crew would be motivated to find some way to 
battle the Shadowcat--magically, physically, even psychologically.

   Now, if you've made up your mind that they cannot defeat the 
Shadowcat, that's fine--but you've got to convince the rest of us, too.

   Just one over-opinionated man's demented ramblings.

--Freemage

PS:  Gary, you'll receive this twice, as I forgot to change the addy the 
first time.  Gomen.


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