Hello there, writer/reader/part-time people =) This is my absolute
first post to this ML, *ever* ;) So I ask that you be kind and nice and
don't yell too loudly when I've made a huge mistake or social gaff or
whathaveyou =)
This fic is the first (and short) part of a hopefully ongoing
series combining spy shows and other espionage culture stereotypes and the
four oft-slighted and (in my opinion anyway) best characters in Sailor
Moon, the Outer Senshi, with various cheap and gratuitous cameos by
various cast members of other anime because, let's face it, original
characters are tought to do ;) Anyway, I've been angsting over how it came
out for weeks now and have only recieved a few reviews from friends of
mine, so I thought I'd throw it out to this ML =)
Oh, I have one huge favor to ask, too. While I always welcome
constructive criticism, can we avoid sending me outright flames? My self
esteem is bad enough as it is -.-
And on with the show?
>Lina-chan (Todd)
<----->
[*] The O-Files: The Messiah is Out(er) There [*]
a Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon Fanfiction by Todd Harper
(lina@maison-otaku.net)
Inspired by conversations with Carmen Spray (haruka@maison-otaku.net)
Author's Note: I owe the majority of this story's concept and
ideals to Ami@ElseMUCK and Haruka@ElseMUCK and a great deal of
conversations that extended farther into the night (the night! The
beautiful night!) than they really ought to. Much thanks to them for
the help and inspiration they provided. =)
The O-Files will probably become a series, if I remember to
write episodes ;). The theme is much less anime-style as it is a
parody of British and American spy shows and forms, primary among them
being The Avengers and the Bond films, although even shows like Get
Smart make an appearance in here somewhere.
Without further ado, on with the show!
[*]============================(+)============================[*]
The O-Files, Episode One: Dark Night in Venice
OPENING TITLES: (To the Theme Song from The Avengers, Season 4-5)
Opening sting plays, then the congos:
[Shot of the Outers in shadow in a dark room in blue lighting]
Voice-Over> Extraordinary crimes against the solar system must be
avenged by senshi extraordinary...
[Shot of Haruka standing next to a race car with the wind blowing]
Two such senshi are Ten'ou Haruka, dashing top professional racer...
[Shot of Michiru looking out to sea reflectively]
..and her partner Kaiou Michiru, multitalented beauty.
[Shot like before, all four Outers but in full light and in civilian
clothes; Haruka wears a bowler.]
Together with mysterious Meiou Setsuna and her daughter Tomoe Hotaru,
they are...the Outers.
[Sting plays again. Shot switches to Haruka as Sailor Uranus in the
foreground translucent, with Haruka running on a track behind that,
then switching to her punching out some cannon fodder spy. Caption
reads "Starring Ten'ou Haruka as Sailor Uranus."]
[Violins start. Shot switches to Michiru as Sailor Neptune in the
foreground translucent, with Michiru playing her violin, then
switching to her in a Emma Peel catsuit with a smoking pistol in her
hand. Caption: "Also starring Kaiou Michiru as Sailor Neptune."]
[Second violins start. Picture of Setsuna holding Hotaru in the
classic "anime mother" pose (Setsuna over Hotaru's shoulders with her
arms around her neck). Caption reads "With Meiou Setsuna and Sailor
Pluto and Tomoe Hotaru as Sailor Saturn."]
[Final fanfare plays, the picture is of each Senshi back-to-back with
their civilian forms: Haruka is wearing a bowler, Michiru is in the
catsuit. They stand on a large chessboard, without pieces. Logo
flashes for the show in front of them.]
[Scene 1: Interior, Michiru's Bedroom, Ten'ou Mansion]
The lovely aqua-haired woman sat quietly in her bedroom,
her most prized possession- a Stradivari violin of great worth-
cradled in her delicate hands. As the sunlight beat down on her
statuesque features, she moved the bow expertly across the
instrument, producing sound of haunting quality.
However, much to her surprise, when her hand sneaked out
to turn a page in her sheet music, a small white card fell out of
the book of notes, landing on the floor silently. The music came
to a stop as Kaiou Michiru picked up the card, reading it
silently. A look of concern temporarily marred her smooth
featured face, before she respectfully set down the violin and
walked for the door, placing the card on her dresser as she
passed.
It read, "Ms. Kaiou- We're needed."
[Scene 2: Interior, TSUKI Headquarters, Tokyo, Japan]
TSUKI Headquarters. What most citizens of Tokyo did not
know was that, despite the constant assertion by various groups
that they had a secret techno-type base sitting under the very
feet of the citizens, this was only true for one organization
(thanks to rent control): TSUKI, Tokyo Secret Underground Kinky
Intelligence.
Formed as a defense against marauding villains from
various corners of the universe (who luckily generally decided
Tokyo would be the best place to start conquest in), TSUKI was a
truly powerful organization of globally networked agents known as
"senshi," who protected humanity against the villain of the week.
Michiru appeared through a side door marked "Main
Character Entrance," which opened with a technological hiss of a
sound effect obviously stolen from Star Trek, and entered the
main control room of TSUKI HQ.
TSUKI Central Control, located directly beneath Juuban
High School (where the majority of the agents masqueraded as
"bishoujo," or "cannon fodder"), was a massive room extending at
least three or four normal rooms high. The lighting was provided
by the flashing of hundreds of computer screens, as operatives in
standard TSUKI dress of a revealing sailorfuku and jackboots sat
in front of hundreds of terminals, each rotating around a
central, immense holographic projections of various maps and
displays. Plastered on every third or fourth monitor chair was a
large sticker with yellow and black warning stripes, reading
"Property of Galaxy Police. Do not remove under penalty of law."
The green-haired violinist made her way to the
centralmost computer station, which was currently inhabited by
two distinct figures. One was a relatively short, raven-haired
girl with a very pale complexion. Instead of a regulation fuku,
she wore a skin-tight, deep indigo body-glove with black inlays,
and over that a skirt and vest of the same indigo color. Leaned
up against the console was a long stick with a recurved blade,
chained to the console. A tag hanging off the blade read,
"Silence Glaive: Use only in emergencies."
The other woman was tall and stately, with dark
hunter-green hair which fell nearly to her ankles, being bunned
into a single bun at the back of her head. She wore a blood-red
garnet cocktail dress and red pumps, with a long, unbuttoned
white lab coat over that. She carried a long staff with her, with
a deep red orb set in the top. A large plaque was hung off the
side of the staff which read "Executive Restroom Key."
The lab-coated woman turned to Michiru as she approached,
and smiled faintly. "Good morning, Ms. Kaiou. You partner will
be along shortly."
The violinist raised an eyebrow. "Did something happen to
Haruka?" she asked nonchalantly, flipping a lock of aqua hair
over her shoulder.
"Setsuna-mama wanted donuts," the raven-haired girl said
flatly. With a *clang* the Executive Restroom Key came down on
the girl's head. "Itai...nani yo?"
Setsuna reclaimed her staff and straightened her shirt.
"Right then...Miss Ten'ou had a special mission to run..."
"If you can call Boston creme that..." *CLANG*
"Haruka had *a mission of vital importance to run* and
shall be back shortly. In the mean time, Ms. Kaiou, I'll show you
some special technology R&D has developed for your next mission."
"I'll show her...someday TSUKI won't have Tomoe Hotaru to
pick on anymore..." the raven-haired girl muttered, her voice
dropping in pitch. There was a moment of awkward silence before
she realized that she had fallen prey to Minako Syndrome (tm).
Setsuna and Michiru sweatbeaded.
As Setsuna and Michiru turned to head toward the new
gadgetry, there was a loud *CRASH* from the side of the
control room as a small sports car with a yellow paint job that
can only be described (politely) as "eye-catching" drove
through a nearby wall and rammed into the soda machine, which
fell over and killed a nearby office worker.
Out of the top of the car leaped a dapper-looking
young man, wearing a bomber jacket and a very crisp-looking
suit with creases that made Washuu's hair look fluffy by
comparison. He vaulted over the side, bending down toward the
office worker, asking in a concerned, husky voice, "Are you
alright? Will you live?"
But the worker only sneered, and said in a voice that
did not betray what little of his wimpy, pencil-pusher frame
could be seen from under the soda machine, which routinely
whapped him on the head by dispensing cans of Coke. "You *bonk*
may think *bonk* you've won *bonk*, Agent Ten'ou *bonk*, but
in the end *bonk*, CHAOS will *bonk* prevail *bonk*."
With that, there was a puff of smoke. It lasted a bit
longer than truly necessary, and soon passed as Hotaru turned
on the Emergency Smoke Removal System. As the fourteen
bishoujo with palm fronds stalked out of the room, Michiru,
Setsuna, and Hotaru made their way over to Agent Ten'ou. All
that was left of the former CHAOS agent was a small Chibi-Usa
plushie. It glinted an evil pink in the halogen lighting.
"A Chibi-Usa plushie..." Michiru said calmly.
"This could only by the work of one evil group..."
Agent Ten'ou said with a nod.
"Saban?" Hotaru asked.
*BONG*
Setsuna shook her head as Hotaru held hers in pain.
"No...much worse..."
"CHAOS!" the three elder agents said simultaneously.
There was a dramatic pause.
"Oh, and Setsuna? They were out of cruellers, so I got
some jelly-filled," Haruka said, pulling a Dunkin Donuts box
out of the backseat of her now-wrecked car.
Setsuna laughed nervously, until Michiru knocked her
out with the Executive Restroom Key. "Pluto no baka!"
"I want a glazed one," pouted Hotaru.
BUMPER: The Bond theme begins, complete with camera-iris-eye
effect; however, the effect reveals Haruka standing back to
back with Sailor Uranus as the bumper music for Sailor Moon S
plays in the background.
[Commercial for Sailor Croft action playset]
BUMPER: Once more the Bond theme begins, but this time the
iris eye reveals Michiru (in Peel catsuit) standing back to
back with Sailor Neptune as the SMS bumper music plays.
[Scene 3: Interior, Setsuna's Lab, TSUKI HQ]
The dark-haired woman led her fellow TSUKI agents over
the her lab station, at the base of holographic display
chamber. She pointed to her desk, which was oddly free of
clutter. Michiru sat on the corner of the desk while Haruka
pulled a bowler out of LunaSpace (tm) and placed it on her
head, standing next to Michiru and holding the box from Dunkin
Donuts. Hotaru looked on in hunger.
Setsuna pushed a button on her desk, and a
holo-monitor appeared...and just as suddenly went staticky.
"Oh, *hell*...it's doing it *again*!" She whapped the desk,
*hard*, with a donut. The monitor cracked, then began to cry
with a piercing wail.
Michiru and Hotaru covered their ears. Haruka blinked.
"I knew these were day-olds, but come *on*..."
Setsuna frowned, then rummaged under the desk. "Well
here's the problem...someone installed Usagi95 on my desk
computer." She removed a bento from the CPU and threw it over
her shoulder, then blinked as she heard a loud "ITAI!" as it
bounced off Hotaru's head. The screen went blank, then there
was some tinkering as Setsuna pried underneath her desk with
the Executive Restroom Key.
Michiru blinked her sea-green eyes. "That thing has a
whole ton of uses."
Hotaru laughed cynically. "You don't know the half of
it."
*WHAP* "Itai!"
Setsuna continued to fiddle as Hotaru rubbed her head.
"Someday, you'll see...someday..." Hotaru said. Small
white ghost-like lights appeared and her eyes got all shadowy.
After another awkward pause, she found her three companions
looking at her with sweatdrops. She fumbled with her skirt and
the three senior agents turned back to Setsuna, who had risen
from under the desk and was looking at her monitor.
The symbol of Pluto-a big P-appeared, followed by the
face of an old man. It quipped, in a calm, artifical voice,
"What are you doing, Pluto?"
Pluto whapped it on the head with the ERK (Executive
Restroom Key). There was some static, the the face said, in
the same voice, "Good morning, Setsuna Meiou. I am
Chronos2000, running Silver Millinux v2.5. How may I serve
you?"
"Ano, Haruka-papa? Can I have a donut?"
"Pipe down, Hotaru...now, Chronos, I need the
schematics for the new equipment for Haruka and Ms. Kaiou."
"Can I please have a donut?" Hotaru pleaded.
"Yes, Setsuna," the computer said in its maddeningly placid tone.
The face vanished to be replaced by a few menus and dialogue boxes.
Setsuna sat down and was about to type in something when there was a
tapping on her shoulder. She turned around to see Hotaru looking at her
with the same gaze a child has when they're about to tell you they *REALLY
NEED TO GO* but it's too late anyhow.
"WHAT?!" Setsuna snarled irritably.
Hotaru looked around nervously. "I really, really think you should
let me have a donut," she said, trembling. Haruka and Michiru glanced at
the pair, sweatbeading.
Setsuna sighed and turned back to her desk, mumbling about hired
help and screen time. "Now: I've taken into account the last weapon CHAOS
has devised to try and foil you both on your last mission..." A familiar
blueprint and rendered photo came up, spinning. In the garbage can, a
small red box with black lettering read: "Duke Nukem PowerPoint Plug-In".
Haruka and Michiru both leaned over Setsuna's shoulders to get a
good look at the screen, and turned away from the sulking Hotaru. The
blonde tipped her bowler and grinned at her partner. "The Chibi-Laser.
That was a most interesting caper, wasn't it, Ms. Kaiou?" She smiled
winningly.
Michiru just blinked, noticing the copy of "Fake British Accents
in 4 Easy Lessons" in Haruka's coat pocket. "Certainly. Whatever you say,
Haruka." She tried to smile winningly, but when your musculature has been
squeezed into polyurethane combat clothing for 3 seasons it tends to
affect your motor control. She managed a grin and resolved to get some
looser outfits.
Meanwhile, Setsuna nodded at Haruka. "Indeed, the Chibi-Laser. I
sent the blueprints for it that you..." she paused and smiled wryly,
"...*acquired*...to R&D to see if they could use it..."
Up in R&D, Chibi-Chibi happily colored in some more spaces on the
pretty blue paper with her markers.
"...And they produced this." She turned her chair around a
half-turn. "Hotaru, could you pleaaaaack!"
The aqua and tow-haired agents blinked at Setsuna's reaction, and
turned slowly as well.
They suddenly went very, very pale.
Hotaru stood, in her hands the Silence Glaive, trailing bits of
the chain used to attach it to the desk. Behind her lay a trail of carnage
and broken office equipment that would leave Sailor Accountant and Sailor
Comptroller nervous wrecks for weeks. A black star shone on her forehead
and dark energy swirled around her body. She said, in a calm voice with a
sound like Death choosing the velvet or the cashmere:
*IT WOULD BE BEST IF YOU WERE TO GIVE ME A DONUT.*
There was a long pause.
Michiru was the first to act.
"Frosted okay?"
BUMPER: (See above)
[Advertisement for a Ms. Kaiou Brand (tm) Polyurethane Cat Suit]
BUMPER: (See above)
[Scene 4: Interior, Goldhair's Chambers, CHAOS HQ]
The first thing that was noticeable was her *hair*.
True, it was one of those dark, nasty villain-type rooms...the
ones with the dark, dank rock formations (each with a small yellow tag:
Mal-Mart Special! $45.99) and lighting that appeared usually to come from
hidden halogen lamps stragetically placed behind the everpresent throne of
the villanous leader.
Goldhair did not think that was so necessary: her *hair*, as
perfectly sculpted as a Corinthian decorative pillar and with twice the
amount of structural capacity. It was a bright, BRIGHT orange color that
made Haruka's car seem like faded denim by comparison. Some villains
decided to blast their minions with unholy fire when they failed their
masters.
She simply made them stare at her *hair*.
But the author pulls away from the hair with obvious effort...
Goldhair was a tall, beautiful woman. Her features were so
porcelain the Franklin Mint had prices on her cheekbones and eyes
like...well, like eyes, basically. She apparently subscribed to the Grace
Jones school of Tacky Armor-Like Costumes, and wore a gown of such
incredible *plasticity* that you could *almost* see the "Visa Gold"
indentations on the panels of her short fuku-like skirt. A pair of
delicate bracelets of (wait for it...) gold encircled each wrist as well.
She stood over her domain, surveying it with incredible arrogance
and self-confidence. *THIS* was where she felt home. *THIS* was where all
of her schemes would come to fruition.
There was a long pause, and then the elegant, golden woman spoke:
"THIS IS A BLOODY STUDIO FLAT IN SHIBOUYA WITH STYROFOAM
STALAGTITES!" To demostrate she snagged one and thwapped one of her
henchmen with it heavily. "*HOW* am I supposed to *RULE THE UNIVERSE* from
KIYONE AND MIHOSHI'S APARTMENT?!" Ironically, her last rant was cut off by
the passage of the 9:45 bullet train bound for Shinjuku. The gathered
henchmen, each in sailor fukus with matching fluffy animal headbands,
shuffled their feet and tried not to look directly at Goldie's head.
Long moments passed as the metallic-haired villainess watched the
train pass by with obvious annoyance. After what seemed like an eternity,
the joke ended as the author thought of something cleve to say.
Goldhair grinned evilly. "But fear not! Soon my latest scheme will
come to the light, and not even the protagonists will be able to stop me!"
She kicked at one of the dark walls, which fell over with a *CRASH* of
matte painting being subjected to large amounts of kinetic force.
Golden hair glinted evil in the halogen lighting.
A stalagtite fell on an unsuspecting henchman.
"And we can get the hell *OUT OF THIS DUMP*! Hahaha, hahahahaha,
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA..."
[Scene 5: Mission Briefing Room, TSUKI HQ]
Meanwhile, our heroes were taking a much deserved coffee break
whilst the author played out a varying amount of injokes in the customary
villain spiel. Hotaru munched happily on her frosted donut and her three
compatriots were keeping a sharp distance lest she begin to crave coffee.
The Silence Glaive sat, with an eerie white glow, next to the cup
dispenser.
"Oh, Haruka...we're going to Venice! I've always wanted to go back
to Venice!" Michiru gushed, nibbling demurely on a scone. She tossed a
lock of sea-green hair over her head.
Setsuna nodded in response and sipped her coffee as Haruka pushed
the hordes of paparazzi about to swarm her beloved out of the room,
slamming the door. The blond agent turned back to her partner (with no
less than a few unprintable muttered oaths about the author's perverse
sense of humor) and dusted off her hands, attempting to look svelte. "It's
a very romantic place, don't you think, Ms. Kaiou?" she said, flashing a
winning smile.
"We're not on camera, Ruka. Give it up," Setsuna deadpanned.
Haruka raised a gold shaded eyebrow. Michiru nodded her assent and
pointed with the scone at the camerman in the rafters, sound asleep.
With a sigh of extreme relief, the blond agent slumped against the
table and wrapped an arm around Michiru with a relaxed posture. "Thank God
for that. What the hell is all this genteel nonsense anyway?"
Setsuna shrugged, hunter green hair shifting with the motion.
"Beats me. You get the cool floating car and all this tech stuff. All I
get to do is these bit parts explaining your mission every time and
babsitting *her*," the Guardian of Time and the Executive Restroom Key
noted, jerking a thumb at the small, purple-black haired girl who happily
had moved on to the cruellers.
Hotaru flashed a pupilless stare at Setsuna, black star returning
briefly.
*DO YOU COVET MY BOSTON CREME, MORTAL?* The voice was like the
sound of velvet being run over with a steamroller.
Setsuna cringed. "Nothing, nothing, Hotaru-chan...have a glazed."
The mistress of evil persona faded with a final *THANK YOU* that
reverberated in the room's chambers eerily.
Michiru was, again, the quickest on the uptake. "Maybe now would
be a good time to get back on camera," she suggested, mildly.
Haruka had already turned blue from Michiru's death grip on her.
"Can't...breathe...must...fight...glomp..."
[Scene 6: TSUKI HQ Parking Lot]
It was...incredible. Even Hotaru was forced into silence by the
awe that was...
The paint job on Haruka's car.
"I'm *BLIND*!" shrieked Setsuna, covering her face with her hands.
"I'll never see again, just this unending field of yellow..." Hotaru
reached up and patted her on the shoulder.
"There, there, Setsuna-mama," the young,
previously-insane-demoness girl commented in a very reasonable tone of
voice which didn't involve a single boldface stroke. Her companions stared
at her, dumbfounded.
Hotaru, for her own part, just looked kawaii. "What? Is there
donuts crumbs on my shirt or something?" She looked down to brush any
offending pastry particles from her black dress.
Haruka glanced at Michiru, and the aqua-haired girl nodded at some
kind of silent verbalization between the two. While Setsuna cowered before
the supernova of Haruka's sportscar and Hotaru cutely brushed imaginary
crumbs of Boston creme from her shirt, the senshi agent duo *leapt* into
the seats of the car and drove off in a screech of peeling rubber. By the
time Setsuna's eyesight returned, Haruka's car was but a mere second
yellow sun on the horizon.
The senshi of Time cursed loudly. Hotaru glanced at her with
confusion. "Nani yo, Setsuna-mama...what was that all about." She paused,
then added with innocent confusion, "And what did you mean when you called
Haruka-papa a dy..." but was abruptly cut off by Setsuna's hand clamping
over her mouth.
The tech director screamed into the distance, "WITHOUT THE MISSION
SPIEL YOU'RE GOING TO BE *SORRY*, DAMNIT!" She gazed off after the
retreating car with a look of concerned anger on her face, as Hotaru
turned blue and passed out.
"Mou....gomen, Hotaru-chan..."
*THAT'S ALRIGHT. I FORGIVE YOU.*
And then, silence. D'oh.
[BUMPER]
[Miscellaneous commercial. Make one up ;) ]
[BUMPER, then beginning of CLOSING CREDITS sequence:]
[O-Files comes up semi-opaque over stock footage of a *BRIGHT* yellow
sports car driving down the Coastal highway, with of course Haruka and
Michiru in the seats. With a gun of the motor, the car heads over the
cliff as the end theme to "The Avengers" plays]
Haruka blinked. "HOLD EVERYTHING!" The music ground to a halt, the
blue screen of the cliff stopped. With a loud WHIRR the wind machine shut
down, despite the fact that the breeze didn't move either agent's hair an
*inch*.
Michiru glared at some unspecified point off-set and shouted
angrily, "WHEN do we get to VENICE?" She pouted and sunks into the seat of
the car, which was still shaking from the special effects machinery until
the violinist gave the outside door a loud *THUNK* and looked over the
side of the car, growling "Knock it *off*!"
There was a sigh as a slightly high-pitched male voice shouted,
"Take 5, min'nasan!" and the sounds of scuffling as techs and makeup
people and other assorted crewmen ambled off for coffee and donuts,
followed soon by loud screaming and a deep, rich *BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*
from the vague direction of Hotaru's dressing room.
Haruka sighed as the director edged into view: a medium-tall,
heavily built post-adolescent wearing the same sort of clothing most
Hollywood directors wear: simple pants, a flannel shirt, and a vest. He
sighed, readjusting the clipboard in one hand and brushing a lock of brown
hair out of his eyes.
"What the hell kind of ending is this?" the blonde senshi growled,
climbing out of the car alongside Michiru, who kicked at the crewmen
underneath. "I mean, you kill off Setsuna..."
From offstage, there came a vague cry of "Um, really, not quite
dead yet..." followed by a hearty laugh and the ominous boom of *GIVE ME
SOME TIME*.
Haruka continued, undeterred. "..We never get our mission, and
Michiru doesn't get to go to Venice, which means I have to sleep on the
*COUCH* for the next few days beca..." but was cut off by a violin
crashing down on her head.
The director seemed about to comment before the soundstage door
flew open and the room was bathed in a golden light so intensely *bright*
that a strangled voice in the back screeched "Twice! I've been blinded
*twice* now!". When the special effects cleared, Goldhair stepped out form
in front of a spotlight after slipping a $20 to each of the crewmen, who
continued to roll it down the hall, shrugging.
"WHERE'S TODD?" she bellowed. Michiru winced and Haruka's eyes
just got more swirly. The director flinched, then sighed.
"I cannot believe this. The five of you have systematically
*totally* destroyed the ending to this show. If you weren't cosmic avatars
I'd have you *replaced*," the director, apparently named Todd, muttered.
*WHAT WAS THAT?*
Everyone simultaneously ERKed. Everyone knew Hotaru was in a bad
enough mood as it is, but *contract negotiation* was just *TOO FAR*.
The director almost had enough time to get out,
"HotaruwaitIcanexplai..."
[Black screen with O-Files logo and the words "To Be Continued"
superimposed. Final musical sting plays.]
<----->
Whew! Part 1 completed at last...after all the injokes, all the
mysterious allusions, all the *WHINING* on my part that it would never get
finished, I finally managed to get it done =) Please feel free to email me
comments, flames, suggestions, whatever to lina@maison-otaku.net. I'll
start on Part 2 as soon as Carmen and I have some time to sit up and whine
at each other ;) Hope you enjoyed this. =)
[*]===-----------------------------------------------------------------===[*]
"Wherever monsters rampage, I'll be there to take them down...wherever
treasure glitters, I'm there to claim it...whenever an opponent rises to
face me, victory shall be mine!" -Lina Inverse, Slayers TV Op.
[*]===-----------------------------------------------------------------===[*]
Todd Harper: lina@wwa.com, lina@maison-otaku.net
University of Wisconsin@Madtown and overall violent yet friendly guy =)
http://www.maison-otaku.net/~lina
Bishoujo Senshi Sailor MUX: darklin.telmaron.com 6250
[*]===-----------------------------------------------------------------===[*]