The phone rang as the jukebox finished a song whose name had long 
been forgotten; at the bar, a drunkard was licking the spilt beer 
from the counter-top.  The barman picked up the phone and intoned in 
a semi-lively voice; "Moe's Tavern."
   The caller's voice was slightly muffled as it asked;  "Is your 
refrigerator running?"
   "Hold on," answered Moe.  "I'll check."  A quick look under the 
counter provided the answer.  "Yeah, it's running."

   Bart grinned as he delivered the punchline;  "Well don't you think 
you should catch it?"  On the other end of the line, Moe could be 
heard making vague - and not-so-vague - threats as to what would 
happen if he should ever catch this prank-caller.  Bart simply burst 
out laughing as his sister sniggered lightly in the corner, trying to 
hide the mirth she was feeling.
   "Bart!"
   "Ididn'tdoit," came the familiar reply.
   Homer Simpson came into the room from the kitchen, holding a 
plastic wrapper in his hand.  "Did you steal the pork-chops your 
mother was thawing?"
   Without a word, Bart pointed out the back window to Santa's Little 
Helper.  The dog was busy chewing on the remnants of semi-frozen 
meat.
  "D'OH!" screamed Homer as he saw his favourite dinner disappearing 
before his eyes.
  "What's the matter, Homey?"
  "Ma-arge!  The dog ate out dinner."
  "My goodness.  Well, we can either have a vegetable salad or we can 
go to the store and get some more meat."
  Homer made a grand, sweeping gesture.  "To the Simpson mobile."

  Bart and Lisa watched as their parents left the house in search of 
dinner.  "Lisa," asked Bart after a few second, "doesn't it ever 
bother you that we might grow up to be like them?"
  "Every once in a while," Lisa admitted, "but then I remember the 
indominable human spirit and I have hope for our future."
  "Yeah, well."  Bart looked at the phone.  "Shall we try another 
number?"
  "Who will you call now?"
  Bart picked up the phone and started dialling.  "That's the beauty 
of this system, Lise - you dial at random.  If there's no pattern, 
they can't ca-"
  "Goddess Helpline," said the voice over the line.  "Please stay 
where you are and someone will be with you shortly."
  Bart slammed the phone down as fast as he could.
  "What's the matter, Bart?" asked Lisa.
  "I think I'm in trouble," answered the youth.
  Just then, a figure began to appear on the surface of the 
television screen.  No - *in* the surface, the kids realised as the 
figure began to take physical form.
  Skuld reached out, placed a foot on the carpet... and paused as her 
other foot got stuck somewhere between dimensions.  Bart and Lisa 
watched in surprise as the newcomer hopped on foot and gracelessly 
pulled on her other leg in an attempt to free it from the TV set.  
"Erm...," the girl said, "I seem to be stuck.  Could you give me a 
hand?"
  Both youths moved in to help, Lisa because someone was in trouble 
and Bart because, frankly, his brain was not quite working at this 
point.  They each grabbed one of Skuld's arms and started to pull...  
Which happened to be the moment Skuld's foot chose to free itself, 
sending the three kids flying backwards into the couch, knocking the 
telephone and lamp off the side-table.  The lamp hit the floor 
heavily and shattered into a million pieces.
  "I tell you Marge, this is the last time Bart steals my wallet," 
Homer was saying to his wife as they stepped through the door and 
first took sight of the wreckage.
  "D'OH!"
  "My Goodness!"
  "Sorry," said Skuld as she picked herself from the floor.


                          Presenting:


                     "D'OH!  My Goodness!"

             A Simpsons/Ahh! Megami-Sama! X-over.




   (hopefully, never coming to a Mailing List anywhere near you)

Aubry Thonon - ITDS Intelicom
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