Akane/Ukyou: What?!

Shampoo: Everybody know Americans lazy.  Like to push button, ding, eat
dinner.  So Americans make push-button Japanese food. <gestures to various
places along the aisle> Also push-button Chinese, French, Italian,
Mexican, and American food too. <points and whispers to Ukyou> Best
American import, Hagen-daas.

Akane: American push-button American food?

Shampoo points to a package labeled 'White Castle'.

Akane: So what's the big secret?

Shampoo: <grabs package and turns it over before handing it to Akane>
Simple recipe, only six steps.  Three steps on how to open package.  Even
child cook.

Akane fumes momentarily at Shampoo's inferrence, but realizes that she
must be right as she recognizes the instructions from last night.  And
that Ranma ate it.  Willingly.  Akane listens as Shampoo gives a quick
description of which packages go together and how many to buy for each
person at the table (including conversion factors for one or more of those
persons being Ranma and Genma).

Selections are made and paid for, the 3 leave the store.

Scene fades to...

The Tendo house.  Soun is setting up the game table for after dinner, he
checks to make sure no one is watching and then moves just a couple of
pieces in the game left from last night.  Kasumi sets the table while
Nabiki watches Genma and Ranma train around and over the pond.  Genma
feints a low strike, drawing Ranma's block, then he shoves Ranma down into
the pond.

Nabiki: <amused> That's three.

Ranma ignores her as she goes into the kitchen to emerge a moment later
returned to male form.

Genma: <annoyed> Are you even trying?  First you skip our morning session,
then you put up this pitiful effort!  What has gotten into you?

Ranma doesn't say anything as he shuffles to a ready position opposite
Genma.

Ukyou comes in, Shampoo and Akane follow.  All are carrying groceries.
Ukyou leaves her bundle in the kitchen and then joins Nabiki watching
Genma and Ranma.

Shampoo and Akane stay in the kitchen and begin preparing the meal.

Shampoo: Shampoo make dessert.  You tell Shampoo if need help?

Akane: I think I can manage. <notices a pot of barely steaming water on
the stove with a ladle next to it> Is this ok to use?

Shampoo: Is ok, must boil.

Akane turns the heat on to high, then separates the bags which need to go
into the water and prepares the trays for the microwave. (No Akane, only
pierce plastic, not stab all through food...)

As the water boils, a splash is heard from the pond.  Akane has just put
the frozen bags into the pot when Ranma-chan walks dripping into the
kitchen.  She picks up the ladle and dips into the pot...

Ranma: YEEOOWWCH!!  WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!  That water doesn't need
to be that hot!

Akane: I'm sorry Ranma, I didn't know that you were using that.

Ranma scowls and storms out of the kitchen, Akane and Shampoo turn to each
other and laugh briefly.

A few minutes later, Ranma and Genma are still sparring.  The table is
finished and Kasumi has joined the others to watch.  Akane emerges from
the kitchen.

Akane: Dinner- <Genma sits at the table> -is ready!

Nabiki dashes in next to sit next to Genma rather than her usual spot.
The others come in followed by Ranma.  Akane finishes setting dishes on
the table, then serves Ranma's portion.

Nabiki: <thinking, inner 'comentary', as Ranma tastes and then shovels>
It looks like Akane has finally gotten it right, twice even, although I am
still glad to have Ranma as a pre-tester. <gets her own portion and eats>
Well, different colors than last night, but it tastes kind of the same...
<Ranma gets seconds> Oh come on Ranma, it isn't THAT good, although I
suppose bland is an improvement over lethal. <dinner is finished and
Shampoo gets up to fetch dessert> Now this is the one I have to watch out
for, but, I am ready... <glances to Genma and smiles>

Shampoo passes out bowls.  Genma digs in immediately, Ranma looks
suspicious, but a sweet smell of honey and cinnamon soon breaks down his
resistance.  Genma finishes quickly and sets his bowl down, looking at
Ranma eating while Ukyou and Akane tell Shampoo of meeting Kuno during
lunch.  Sensing movement, Genma looks down and notices that there are
still a few bites left in the bowl.  These are eaten and Genma looks
around again.  Ranma has finished his bowl and and merely tries to shrink
into himself as the others continue to chatter.  Genma notices more in his
bowl and although he can't figure out where it is coming from, he is not
going to complain.

After a few more tries, Genma decides that nothing more is going to
appear.  He stands up.  He falls down, snoring before he hits the floor.

Ranma: Aww come on pop!  I don't feel like carrying you upstairs tonight.

Shampoo: Shampoo help!

Soon everybody joins in to help carry Genma upstairs, Ranma grumbles while
everyone else seems to find amusement in the situation.  After everybody
wrestles him up the stairs and into bed, Shampoo stops Ranma as the rest
go down the stairs.

Shampoo: Half hour, clean up kitchen.  One hour after, Ranma come up.

Ranma goes downstairs and sits in front of the television, hardly paying
attention, as Soun and Kasumi plead fatigue and go to bed, Soun after
looking wistfully at the game table and it's unfinished game.  A few
minutes later, Nabiki yawns loudly and declares that she too is heading
for bed.

As the alloted time approaches, Ranma begins to feel queasy.  By the time
he goes upstairs, he is sweating and holding his stomach.

Without knocking, Ranma shoves the door open.

Ranma: Alright Shampoo, what have you done to me?!

Akane's room is again lit by candles.  Akane and Ukyou are naked, staring
blankly ahead as they kneel on her bed.  Shampoo seems to have been
interrupted mid-lecture as she turns to face Ranma.  Shampoo wears a
low-cut, slinky black dress.  Studded with tiny faceted gems, the many
points of reflected candle light caught Ranma's eye, or made him want to
look away, he hadn't quite decided...

Shampoo: Shampoo make sure husband learn lesson.

Ranma: What's that supposed to mea- <Ranma clutches his stomach tighter
and groans> What have you done?

Shampoo: Shampoo make sure husband learn lesson. <Shampoo dips water from
a bucket and douses Ranma>

Ranma: Whadja do...? <looks down at her stomach, looks back to Shampoo>

Shampoo: Shampoo give poison for boy-type Ranma, each time faster when
Ranma use hot water-

Ranma: WHY?!  What do I have to do for you to fix it?

Shampoo: <turns and smiles causing Ranma to back up a step> Ranma simply
learn lesson, Shampoo fix.

Scene fades to...

Nabiki's room.  Nabiki checks her tape recorder, she smiles as the level
meter flutters, showing her that she is getting a good recording.  Nabiki
then picks up her camera, checks the film and opens her door just enough
so she will be able to see when Ranma comes upstairs.

When Ranma comes up, she gives him a minute to get to Akane's room and
slips silently out into the hall.  Arriving at Akane's door, Nabiki
carefully slides it open just enough to allow her to peer inside.

Shampoo: Ranma simply learn lesson, Shampoo fix.

Nabiki idly snaps a few pictures while Shampoo continues.

Shampoo: Ranma undress, lay on bed.

Ranma: I dunno, what is this 'lesson'?

Shampoo: <crosses room to door, puts hand on door as if to open> If Ranma
no want learn lesson, Shampoo promise cry at funeral.

Ranma: Alright!  I just wish you'd tell me what you want instead of all
these games!

Nabiki almost chokes trying to keep from laughing out loud.

Shampoo: First Ranma undress, then Shampoo explain lesson.

Nabiki watches as Ranma gets undressed, grumbling all the while.  After
she lays down, Shampoo gives a hand signal.  Akane and Ukyou move to pin
Ranma's shoulders while Shampoo picks up a small wooden chest from the
table.  Opening it, Shampoo takes out a large jade phallus, Nabiki quickly
calculates the value of such a large piece of jade as she snaps a few more
pictures.

Shampoo reaches and spreads Ranma's thighs.  When Ranma momentarily
resists, she scowls.  She uses the tip of the large green rod to work at
Ranma's slit, working into the opening.

Shampoo: Lesson number one:  Girl not like when boy rush too hard,
especially when girl first time.

When Shampoo strikes the jade stalk with the heel of her palm, Nabiki
nearly loses her camera as she winces in shock.  Ranma screams and tries
to pull away.

Shampoo: When boy start slow, girl feel real nice.

Nabiki idly takes a few more snapshots as Shampoo slowly and deliberately
works Ranma to a frenzy.  As Ranma alternatly shrieks and mewls, Nabiki
wonders that she does not hyperventilate as Shampoo relentlessly drives
her to peak after peak.

Shampoo hands the phallus to Akane as she allows Ranma to catch her
breath.

Shampoo: You clean. <nods approval as Akane takes it and begins to lick it
clean> Now Ranma show if learn first lesson.

Shampoo dips hot water from a bucket near the first, splashes Ranma, then
points to Ukyou.  Nabiki watches, dumbfounded as Ukyou silently moves to
lay down on the bed.  Ranma approaches hesitantly to stand between Ukyou's
spread legs, and looks at Shampoo as if trying to be sure of her intent.

Shampoo: Suggest Ranma hurry, poison work on boy-type.

Nabiki takes several more pictures as Ranma proceeds to methodically and
relentlessly drive into Ukyou, starting slowly and building.  Ranma works
until he is dripping sweat as Ukyou shows all of the interest of watching
paint dry.  His face distorts in pain as Shampoo dips water, then stands
by tapping her toe expectantly.

Ranma is pale and clutching his stomach as he collapses, groaning, on top
of Ukyou before Shampoo finally triggers the change.

Shampoo: Ranma not learn enough, come back this lesson later. <Ranma turns
and glares, Shampoo ignores him> Now start lesson number two.

Shampoo points to the futon, next to Ukyou, who is still staring at the
ceiling.  Ranma lays down.  Shampoo then snaps her fingers at Akane.
Akane looks up from cleaning the jade piece, when Shampoo holds out her
hand she gives it to her.  Shampoo points to Ranma's crotch.

Shampoo: You clean.

Ranma: What is this?!

Shampoo: Is more than one way make girl feel nice. <dips hot water> Want
go direct to test now?

Ranma says nothing, merely spreading her legs and allowing Akane to kneel
between her thighs.  Nabiki seems to hesitate, weighing her own intentions
before she snaps the shutter once.  Akane mechanically licks around and
into Ranma's crotch as Ranma watches, an expression of shock across her
face.  Soon, moaning and screaming, Ranma frantically rocks her hips and
grasps at Akane's head.

Shampoo: Enough. <splash>

Nabiki's jaw tightens with rage as Akane suddenly chokes.  Ranma quickly
pushes Akane away and then moves to kneel on the floor beside her.

Ranma: Are you OK?! <Akane nods, gasping.  Ranma stands and steps towards
Shampoo> That was entirely-

Shampoo: If Ranma want antidote. <points to Akane> Show learned lesson.
Suggest hurry.

Ranma slowly turns to see that Akane has already started to climb up onto
the bed.  She lays down and automatically spreads her legs.  Ranma
pointedly ignores Shampoo as he kneels between Akane's thighs.  He catches
her scent, and realizes that he has suddenly become erect.  Gingerly
holding his stiff member, he feels ready to burst, even more than the
night before when Shampoo played with his pressure points.

Nabiki snaps one last picture, as the roll is finished.  As Shampoo dips
water, Nabiki slips back to her room and reloads the camera.  Then she
switches a second tape deck on and checks the levels before shutting off
and reloading the first.  Checking the hallway just before going out,
Nabiki catches Ryoga arriving at the top of the stairs.

Diving for her bed, Nabiki cringes as she hears structural damage being
done to Akane's door (umm...  That's about 40,000 yen...).  "RANMA!!  This
time you will -- BWEEE--"  And silence...  After a moment, Nabiki peeks
out again.  She snaps a picture of Shampoo's back going down the stairs,
bonbori in one hand, unconscious P-Chan in the other.  Seeing that Akane's
shattered door offers no cover, Nabiki sits down and puts on headphones.

Ranma: <strained, painful> Look, she didn't tell you to keep me in this
form. <deep breath> And I promise, on my honor, that I won't try to
escape. <gasp> But please let me change...

Scene fades to...

P-Chan comes to.  His first awareness is of a fetter tightly bound to his
leg.  A thick wire binds him to a metal stake, it quickly proves
impervious to any effort he can muster as P-Chan.  Then he notices a sheet
of paper, propped up just out of his reach.  The instructions are quite
explicit, extolling the virtues of bacon and fried pork cutlets, with nary
a mention of hot water...

Scene fades to...

Shampoo returns to Akane's room.  Ranma-chan lies in the center of Akane's
bed, sound asleep with Akane and Ukyou asleep on either shoulder.  With
exaggerated care Shampoo sets her bonbori on the floor, then dips hot
water and douses the sleeping trio.

Shampoo: Ok, done tonight.  Ranma go back to room.

Ranma: What about the antidote? <glances to still groggy Ukyou and Akane>
What abou them?

Shampoo: <smug> Is no antidote.

Ranma: WHAT!?!

(Brief picture of Nabiki asleep at her desk.  The level meters suddenly
peg to the left and she startles awake, snatching the headphones away...)

Shampoo: No need antidote, effect wear off, few hours.

Ranma: It's not even fatal at all? <Shampoo nods> But what about Akane?
And Ukyou?  What did you give them?

Shampoo: Nothing at all.  Hypnotize.  Blouse work like watch. <pantomimes
dangling a pocketwatch.  Rythmic motion causes reflected candlelight to
ripple, drawing Ranma's eye until he forces his gaze away> They alright in
morning.  Now Ranma go sleep... unless want lesson number three now?

Scene fades, roll end credits.

FORBET02.TXT
Apr 13 1998

jallen9@idt.net

Note:  With a faster connection and a new mailer, I do read the FFML now.
However, if you wish to send a reply directly to me, remove the [FFML] tag
from the subject header as that is what I have Pegasus set to sort on.

More fanfic can be found at http://idt.net/~jallen9/ranma.html
This archive will hold files by Slashtooth and Ridgewolfe as well as
myself (Omnedon).

     *****     *****     *****     *****     *****     *****     *****

A year and a half later, a few disasterous machine crashes and difficult
upgrades have (mostly) been conquered and part 2 is finally finished.

I still wanna know where that extra printer port is coming from and I hate
Windows95.

Constructive criticism and comments are welcome.  Flames will earn a swift
poke at that kawaii little garbage can icon.

     *****     *****     *****     *****     *****     *****     *****

In For Better or for (Even) Worse [Part 3]:

Dinner for P-Chan, or is that P-Chan for dinner?  Dr. Tofu's solution, but
is the cure an improvement?  Ranma enraged.


Omnedon  <jallen9@idt.net>
See the archived fanfics at http://idt.net/~jallen9/ranma.html