Maercutio wrote:
<fic snipped>
Wow, this is amazingly similiar to an idea I'd been batting around for
some time. Quincy as Luthor, it's bleeding obvious when you think about
it.
Now, I did have a problem with Superman's internal dialogue at the
beginning. He sounded too immature, too cocky. If you wanted to
portray him as treating this as routine there are better ways. For
instance, you could have him think about Lois or the next story he was
going to file as Clark Kent.
I just don't see Superman being so cocky. At heart, he's a humble man,
in contrast to Batman's absolute arrogance. He knows full well that you
can't always depend on the good guys winning.
How does Superman immediately know to go to Genom, anyway? I'm assuming
Luther is using another clone body to be Quincy, and Genom probably
didn't even exist when Supes was locked up. Superman shouldn't have the
first clue where to go looking for Luthor. In fact, I would think his
first instinct would be to go look for Lois.
Just as a note, I believe Kryptonians may not age the same as humans.
IIRC from "World of Krypton", they used to use cloned body parts to
extend their lives, but eventually turned to genetic manipulation. The
thing is, since Kryptonians shaved their heads, they never bothered to
adjust the genes controlling hair. That's why all future Superman
stories show him growing grey hair.
Don't plan to see any other super-people show up in this thing, though.
they're all dead. Quin- err, Luthor was VERY thorough. Flash? Dead. Green
Lantern? Dead. Aquaman? Dead. Batman? Dead. Martian Manhunter? Dead. Wonder
Woman? Dead. (well, in her case, raped, THEN dead) In short, everybody's dead.
Expect a visit to the meta-humans graveyard.
I would strongly urge you to rethink this a little. Having Luthor kill
everyone just out of sheer bloodymindedness doesn't make much sense.
Genom's style of domination isn't something the average Superhero would
fight very well against, and I don't see Luthor embarking on a total
slaughter without reason. For one thing, it puts him at far too much
risk. I mean, hell, why even bother with Aquaman? That would just get
a very angry kingdom of Atlantis hunting for the man responsible for the
death of their king.
There's really no reason superheroes can't still exist, it's just that
Luthor did the sensible thing and came to Japan to avoid them (easily
getting the relativelty few Japanese heroes out of the way.) I would
suggest Captain Marvel or the Flash and some others might still be
around. Basically anyone who doesn't have the detective skills to track
down Luthor or isn't likely to conflict with him in the natural course
of events.
I would also suggest that he only _thinks_ he's killed Batman. Batman
is just as smart as Luthor.
Having Luthor suddenly able to kill every single superhero in the world
when a thousand other genius supervillains couldn't handle even one
totally blows my suspension of disbelief here. (I know you can come up
with a thousand plausible scenarios, but it just isn't possible within
the framework of the DC universe. It just couldn't happen that way.)
Besides, I'd really like to hear Luthor's plan for getting rid of the
Spectre. "Well I'll just kill him. Oh damn, he's already dead. And
omnipotent to boot."
Oh yeah, and if you still have Wonder Woman dead, take out the rape bit.
I know you want to establish Luthor as a bad-ass, but I can't picture
him ordering that. Not against someone with whom he has no personal
malice. He isn't that sort of evil.
I plan to finish this, but not anytime real soon, figure six months at LEAST
before I even get out Chapter Two. Oh, and this isn't even the only BGC/DC
Crossover I have planned: there is another, which I won't say anything about
other than to mention that I think Mackie would make a DAMN fine Boy Wonder.
Oh, and I wish to thank the aforementioned friend of mine for this valuable
advice:
"When writing Superman, think what Batman would do in the same situation. Then
write the exact opposite."
I would say that's more true for personality traits. Sometimes their
means will differ, but not totally. Batman will intimidate, but like
Superman, he won't kill.