[Date: March, 1998
Location: Base Teknos, MSTing Theater
Reviewers: Teknos Warhammer
Kooriichi Ayanami: Seraphim's Judgment (EVA)
Reina Ayanami: Seraphim's Judgment (EVA)
{We pan into the theater to see WH is head banging to the Mighty Mighty
Bosstones. In the seats, a pair of albino women. One appears to be about
18, this is Kooriichi, and the other appears to be about 24. Reina seems
to be wearing a flowing white and blue robe with a modified NERV logo on
the front, while Kooriichi is wearing a simple oversized t-shirt and
loose jeans.}
WH: ~ If I EVER HAD TO KNOCK ON WOOD! BUT I KNOW SOMEONE WHO HAS! WHICH
MAKES ME WONDER IF I COULD! MAKES ME WONDER IF I EVER HAD TO... *WHAM
PUNCH WHACK* ~ {It appears that both Ayanami sisters used their
genetically received angel power to shut up our intrepid writer via
telekinetic punches.}
Reina: It's about time he shut up.
Kooriichi: For once Imouto, I agree.
{WH springs back}
WH: Hah! You're just jealous cause I took A Capella for most of my high
school years.
Kooriichi: So you could sing Mighty Mighty Bosstones?
WH: ...
Reina: EITHER WAY!! We're supposed to be reviewing the latest chapter
from this Flashman guy.
Kooriichi: And a peculiar man he is... by the way, what exactly is
Sentai?
WH: We'll talk about it later. Roll fic!]
TRIO:
FIRST BATTLE AGAINST EXCALIBER
[Kooriichi: Was that not the sword King Arthur once wielded? Was it not?
WH: Uh yeah. How did you learn about that?
Kooriichi: Turns out that our secondary genetic mother assisted the Lady
of the Lake in giving that sword to him.
WH: {To the readers} Don't ask.]
The darkness gathered in the chamber as Eclipse Lord returned to
his
throne room. His solid purple eyes scanned the room. All damage
that had been caused by the Time/Space Adaptor had been repaired and
his three highest warriors bowed before him.
Wait a minute. THREE highest?
A second glance reveled that, while Blade Bot, Seer and Lujane
were
at their usual positions, Samaron was no where to be seen.
"Greetings master," Lujane said, "It is good to see you again. Did
your trip go as planned?"
[WH: {imitating EL} The trip was wonderful... until some moronic human
in some hockey mask appeared from nowhere. Such as waste as well.]
"Where is he?" Eclipse Lord asked simply.
"Who master?" Lujane replied, sweating bullets.
"Your husband."
Blade Bot interjected with, "He's too busy playing with his new
toy."
[Kooriichi: The less said and known about this, the better.]
Lujane glared at the robot briefly, turned back to Eclipse Lord
and
explained, "Samaron has finally found the sword Excaliber and is now
testing it. I suppose the tests have gone longer then he expected.
I am certain that he will be with us shortly."
"I detest waiting," Eclipse Lord growled and closed his eyes.
[Reina: {imitating EL} I don' wanna wait! I don wanna wait! WAAAAAA!]
Eclipse Lords consciousness floated through Eclipse Tower and
settled on a room in the Warriors Department.
[WH: *nasal voice* Uh third floor, Men's Wear, Boys Wear, and Warrior
Wear.]
Samaron slashed with Excaliber again and another Scarab Demon
was
cut in half, the green gooey blood splattering all over the walls.
"Come," Samaron challenged, "Though the sword has not yet reached its
full might, I can still feel the added power it gives me rushing
through my veins. I feel ten years younger and it is as if I have
the strength of a god!"
[Kooriichi: {With a small white glow about her and with narrowed eyes.}
Think not so highly of yourself... the first step to self-destruction is
such arrogance.
Reina: {To WH worriedly}Ever since she locked herself in that library
with all those holy texts, she's been weird.]
The three remaining Scarabs quivered in fear as they readied
themselves for the inevitable slaughter. Samaron roared as he
charged, Excaliber held in front of him as he slashed downwards and
cut off the arm of the nearest Scarab. He kicked the one to his left
and then turned to decapitate the one behind him.
[Reina: {slightly green} Yummy.]
The one armed Scarab tried to use its other arm but then that
one
was hacked off as well before a stab to the gut killed it. The third
and final Scarab wobbled back to its feet and saw Excaliber was only
millimeters away from his face when Eclipse Lords voice rang out,
"SAMARON!"
The blow halted and the Scarab Demon fainted in relief.
"Master," Samaron exclaimed in surprise as he looked around,
"You
have returned?"
"Yes," the disembodied voice growled, "I told you to expect me
to
return this day. Why are you not here?"
"I... I," Samaron stuttered, unable to believe that he could
have
forgotten, "I forgot. I have just acquired Excaliber and I lost all
track of time."
[All: {imitating EL again} A likely story.]
There was a long pause as Eclipse Lord pondered this. finally,
the
master of the Eclipse Syndicate said, "So, you have finally found the
sword you have sought for years. In that light, I can forgive your
lapse. However, you must prove your new weapons worth to the Eclipse
Syndicate."
"I shall," Samaron replied as he used a rag to wipe the Scarab
blood
off the blade, "Tomorrow is the day in which Excaliber reaches its
full power. I shall use that power to destroy the Trio and then..."
Samaron paused as he raised Excaliber over his head, "The
Eclipse
Syndicate shall become UNSTOPPABLE!"
[{Kooriichi begins to glow in that creepy way again and scared Reina}]
"Your words are bold," Eclipse Lord said, "and you have delived
on
your promises in the past. Very well, I shall arrange the battle you
seek."
Samaron grinned as he kneeled and said, "Thank you master. Hail
the
Eclipse."
Elsewhere....
[WH: ...in the dark impenetrable void, John Paul Sakson was a movin and
a groovin.
Reina and Kooriichi: ? What was that?
WH: Never mind.]
Gohan frowned in contemplation. "You're sure," Gohan asked the
grim
faced Ranma, "that Samaron didn't make a mistake?"
[WH: {Gohan} Will he still get calls from Citybank?]
"I'm sure," Ranma replied, "I don't know why, but I could
just...
feel, the power radiating off that sword he had in his hands."
"So, what do we do now?" Usagi asked.
[Reina: {Ranma} A Sleepover!]
Gohan felt the weight of both of his friends gazes resting on
him as
soon as Usagi had finished her question. He thought for a while and
then scowled slightly as he said, "I know this won't sit too well but
I think the best option would be to lay low for a while. I'm not
sure when, but I know the day where Excaliber becomes strongest is
soon. Maybe, if we can keep out of sight long enough, we can bypass
the day and then we won't have to worry as much."
"Heeeeey, nice plan," a voice from the kitchen remarked.
[WH: Oh no! They're being ambushed by Jack Nickelson!
{Kooriichi begins to glow unearthly, WH Is picked up and is promptly
slammed into the ground}
Kooriichi: {Picking up a cup of warm tea} I happen to like that man as
an actor.]
The Trio jumped at the unexpected intrusion and then raced into
the
kitchen to see Cambot coming in through an open window. They got
into battle stances and reached for their transformation devices when
Cambot yelped, "Whoa! I'm not here for a fight! I'm just a
messenger!"
"So," Gohan growled, "go ahead. Say something."
[Reina: {Cambot} Sasquatch!]
Cambot didn't speak but, instead, he activated his holographic
equipment and displayed the image of Samaron. "Greetings, my enemies,
" the image said, "I have sent this message as a challenge. I wish
for the three of you to battle with me, tomorrow at noon, at Shea
Stadium.
"If you do not accept, I will be forced to go out into the fair
city
of New York and place my challenge before anyone who will accept it.
I realize the 'New Yorks Finest' will see me as insane but if they
get in my way..." Samaron paused to shrug, "I will be forced to deal
with them. I would not enjoy such actions but that can be avoided if
you come face me. Good day."
[{Kooriichi begins to glow unearthly again and narrows her eyes even
more, this time, Reina is crying and hiding.}]
With that, Cambot snapped off his hologram and flew out the
window
before any of the Trio decided to make him spare parts.
Gohans face grew grim as he turned to the others and said, "Then
I
guess we have no choice. We gotta fight."
"You realize this is probably a trap," Ranma remarked.
"And how do we know he's not bluffing?" Usagi asked.
"He's not," Ranma answered, "I saw it in his eyes."
[WH: {stoned voice} Water on the brain, hehe.]
"We've got until noon tomorrow," Gohan said, "I suggest we do as
much as we can to prepare for it."
[Reina: {Gohan} Well, I suggest that we RUN!!!!]
A development...
The little creature was lost in the sewer tunnels. It's hyper
sensitive smelling abilities useless in the overpoweringly rank odor.
The creature walked towards what looked like light and came out by
an opening that emptied into the Hudson River.
[WH: Just a passing thought, have the Gargoyles made any cameos?]
The creature was fascinated by the light, but a loud rumble
behind
it made it turn around. The little animal let out a small yelp as a
wave of water stormed down the sewer tunnel and then pushed it into
the Hudson.
[WH: Oh no! Al Bundy just flushed!! Run for you lives!!]
An hour later....
Ranma sighed to himself, with the way things were going, Usagi
was
NEVER going to get that move right. "Again," he said, trying to keep
the frustration from creeping into his voice.
[{Kooriichi's frown suddenly vanishes and then she holds her hand to her
face and snickers. Reina and WH breathe a sigh of relief.}]
Usagi nodded once and tensed her legs. She pushed off and
jumped
into the air. She tucked her legs like Ranma had told her too and
leaned back. She started to flip over but, when she reached the
portion where she was upside down, she suddenly stiffened and lost
her concentration.
With a loud, "Oof" she hit the ground... face first.
[All: {wince}]
Ranma growled and snapped, "What is your problem?! How many
times
do you have to do this until you get it right?!!"
[Kooriichi: Until the cows come home I surmise?]
Usagis face fell and she sniffed as she replied softly, "I'm
sorry.
It's just that, when I try to do this, I start thinking about...
about..." she started to blush.
Ranma, interested instead of angry now, asked, "About what?"
[Reina: {Usagi} Soda crackers... I don't know why.]
"Well... I'm probably going to have to do that move when I'm
Sailor
Moon and... well, the outfit kindda leaves me... well..." Usagi
blushed even deeper.
"Oh," Ranma said quietly as he blushed as well, the implication
of
what Usagi had said hitting him, "Well... why don't you add sweat
pants or something to the outfit?"
Usagi shook her head, "No go. I tried putting a pair on under
the
skirt and when I changed to normal and transformed again, they were
gone."
"Then..." Ranma sighed, "just try not to think about it, okay?"
[Reina: HAH! Easy for you to say! I wasn't wearing a thing in EOE and
you know how hard it was for me to keep that same straight face?!?!?!
So, I wouldn't be complaining bunny girl.]
Somewhere in a junk yard....
Great Sayaman picked up ten small rocks and, using both his
super
strength and speed, tossed them high into the air. Then, he powered
up his ki and used it to create small, yellow ki balls, which he used
to hit the rocks with pin point accuracy and insured that none of
them hit the ground as anything more then a fine mist.
He took a big breath and then powered up to his super form. The
ground around him shattered into a small crater and then, he sunk his
fingers into the large broken down van next to him and heaved it into
the air. He cupped his hands to his side and cried, "KAAAAAMEEEEE..."
[WH: HIT THE DECK!! {Reina and WH duck while Kooriichi looks on in
fascination.}]
As the van reached the apex of its climb, a ball of energy
appeared
in the space between Sayamans hands, small shafts of energy escaping
it, "HAAAAAMEEEEE..."
As the van started to fall, Sayaman whipped his hands forward
and
shouted, "HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!"
The energy in his hands blasted at the van as a large cone of
energy
that atomized the boulder and kept going until it reached past the
moon and made a small crater on the planet Mars.
[{Kooriichi's face soon becomes emotionless... almost as if she was
planning something.}
Kooriichi: ...interesting... very interesting...]
Sayaman took several deep breaths and then flew off. He was as
ready as he was going to be.
He only hoped it was going to be enough.
[WH: He had to do a stand up routine. No wonder.]
That night, 11:58 PM....
Shea Stadium was filled to the rafters as Scarab Demons,
Warriors,
Magic creatures and robots, all loyal to the Eclipse Syndicate, sat
in the seats of the baseball stadium. Brunt and Bombard sat in the
box seats. Brunt was sleeping, as the hour was rather late and
preparing for the upcoming battle had taken most of the day. Bombard
was still going strong however, and was even wearing a baseball cap
and waving a little flag. Both of which contained the mark of the
Eclipse Syndicate.
Samaron sat on the pitchers mound, meditating and holding Excaliber
in front of him. His eyes had remained closed ever since he had sat
down, which had been over five hours ago and then, they snapped open
and he stood.
[WH: {Fat announcer's voice} And here he is Samaron stepping up to the
plate here in the middle of a perfect day at Shea Stadium, let me tell
ya perfect for a lukewarm Budweiser, you know Lincoln carpeting and�
*LEVITATE AND SLAM INTO GROUND SEVERAL TIMES*
WH: ...owie...]
The dragon samurai raised the mystical sword in his hands to the
sky
and intoned, "The time has come. Now, the true power of Excaliber
shall be released upon the world... and let all that stand in its
path tremble."
[Reina: {Samaron} For it slices and dices and also makes Julian fries!!
WH: Now that's scary!]
The broadsword started to crackle with small, white arcs of
energy.
They grew in size and intensity, until they began to shoot off from
the sword and blazed around the stadium. Many of the Eclipse
Syndicate troops dodged for cover as the energy blasts that escaped
from the sword grew more and more intense.
[Kooriichi: {sweatdrop} Um, I think that he accidentally put his finger
into a light socket.]
Then, as if nothing had ever happened, the light vanished and
Samaron lowered the sword to his side. However, there was something
different about him. His eyes glowed white and his arms and legs
seemed to be somewhat more muscular, as did his chest. His sharp
teeth were longer and more visible and his voice sounded somewhat
deeper as he said, "Let the Trio come. For when they DO, they shall
meet their doom."
[WH: So you say leather breath.]
Elsewhere....
<I miss you so much,
I never thought that I would be saying that about you but it's
true.
When you were here, I know I always jumped to conclusions and always
hit you.
But, whenever I thought that you might be hurt or killed or
whenever
you were gone, there was this ache in my heart that I didn't want to
admit existed. Maybe I do love you.
It took me three hours to write that last sentence, and I also
have
to make sure that our fathers don't read this when I go to mail it or
they'll come over to wherever you are and try to get us married right
away.
Keep safe Ranma.
Love,
Akane>
[WH: Awww...
Reina: Hmph, I hate this WAFFy stuff. *She is levitated off the ground
and slammed into the floor*
Kooriichi: But as a matter of face, I do.]
Setsuna sighed as she read the note and then tossed it into the
flames of the fire place. "It is so sad," she whispered to herself,
"that one who has given her heart so totally to one man will only
have it shattered."
[WH: AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGG!!! JERK!! MONSTER!! HOW DARE YOU
BURN SOMETHING LIKE THAT!!!!! {Takes his warhammer and starts bashing
everything in sight, and is about to bash the sisters when he thinks
better of that and just hits the walls instead.}]
She reached for the plate that sat on the end table that had an
okinomiyaki love letter on it, which she promptly ate. She let
herself sink into the plush chair that she was currently sitting on
and sighed again. Her thoughts turned inward once more as she
reviewed what was going on. "Excaliber has been taken. The great
battle will soon begin, and even that shall only lead to greater
battles. This is where things will start to move quickly. I must be
prepared."
[WH: Grr grr grr, Should just tossed the witch of the spatula's letter
in there.
{Kooriichi puts her hand on his wrist.}
Kooriichi: Calm yourself... it's only a story. {Just like that, WH's
heart slows down and he is calm. For the time being.}]
Her thoughts were interrupted as a blood curdling scream came
from
Trunks room. She stood and transformed into Sailor Pluto as she
raced down the hall. "Trunks?" she asked cautiously as she threw
open the door.
[Reina: {Pluto} Put some trunks on!! *WHAM* Oof.]
In the room, Trunks had fallen out of his bed and was on his
knees.
His hands gripped the sides of his skull and a small trickle of blood
ran down from his nose. "The... the..." he tried to get out, "the
power... it's incredible... I've never sensed such... ARRRRGH!!!"
[WH: {trunks} uhuhuhuh
SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!]
Without warning, Trunks went Super Saya-jin, zipped around the
room
to grab his clothes and sword and then jetted out of the window.
"TRUNKS!" Pluto called after him, "Do not do this!"
It was too late, for he was already gone. Pluto froze for a
moment
as she thought, "I must stop him. He plans to fight Samaron before
the Trio. It is not likely that he will achieve victory, but if he
should somehow be able to do it..."
[Kooriichi: {Pluto} It will pad the fic immensely. I must stop him!]
Pluto shuddered at a distant memory and whispered, "No. Never
again.
I vowed that it would not happen ever again."
[WH: {Pluto} That's the last time I listen to the Spice Girls.]
She opened a time portal and stepped inside. Once she was gone,
the
portal closed with a silent pop and stillness ruled the house.
[Kooriichi: And while Stillness rules, Silence kept a check on finances,
Serenity was the chief of police, and calm was in charge of staff
meetings.]
At Shea....
Samaron stood, going through many motions to keep loose for the
battle that would soon come. Lujane walked onto the field and
watched her husband. Everyone else had left, as they had only been
there to see Excaliber power up. However, they would return later in
the day when the time for battle came.
finally, the leader of the Inner Four spoke. "Husband," she
said,
"Are you certain you do not wish to go to bed?"
"I have no need of sleep," Samaron replied, "the mystic energy
of
Excaliber is more then enough to sustain me."
[WH: {Samaron} Besides, sleep is for wussies.]
Lujane smirked slightly as she said, "I thought so."
With that, she took off the backpack that she had been wearing
and
took out the sleeping bag. Samaron smiled and was about to say
something when a voice from behind them shouted, "Don't get
comfortable. Your hubby's not gonna be here very long!"
[Reina: I'm the repo man. I've come to repossess your husband. ]
The two of them turned and saw a man with stiff, spiky blond
hair
and wearing a leather jacket over a purple shirt and blue jeans,
standing on one of the foul posts. Strapped to the mans back was a
large broad sword. Samaron readied himself as the man leaped from
the post, did a complete forward flip and landed on second base. He
drew his sword and held it up. Samaron eyed him cautiously as he
said, "You are quite rash young man."
[WH: Then use some Tinactin.
{Both sisters blink, think for a second, then groan.}
Reina: Even you for, that was bad.]
"I know that you've been waiting for a chance to battle the
Trio,"
the man replied, "but that's not gonna happen. I, Trunks, will not
allow it."
[Reina: {Samaron} Those are pants, their Levis!]
Samaron grinned, "You can not stop it boy. Even your
considerable
power is nothing compared to Excalibers might."
"We'll just see about that."
"Interesting. I have heard mention of you by my fellow Eclipse
Syndicate members. This shall be a good battle."
"Stop talking and lets fight!"
Samaron looked to see that Lujane had made her way to the dugout
and
growled, "As you wish!"
[Kooriichi: {Shifty eyed and snickering} I certainly hoped it was not
meant the same way Wesley from Princess Bride meant it.]
Samaron charged and swung Excaliber in a downward chop. Trunks
dodged quickly and when he was back up to a vertical base, he took a
swing of his own. The swords collided and sparks flew. The two of
them took several more swipes, each perfectly blocking each other and
causing more sparks to erupt from where the weapons collided.
The two of them locked swords and attempted to use leverage to
disarm their opponent. "This isn't good," Trunks thought as he
flared his aura, "I never thought that Excaliber would increase his
strength so much."
[Reina: It was either that or his ego. Take your pick.]
Trunks flew up into the air and then dived down to impale
Samaron.
The dragon samurai took a deep breath and concentrated as Trunks
rushed towards him from above. A white aura gathered around the
mystic swords' blade and, when Trunks was mere inches away, he swung
it in a tight arc.
Trunks landed from his dive attack and simply stood there.
Samaron
did the same, his arm still extended from his last attack. Neither
combatant moved for the longest moment. Then, the majority of
Trunks's sword broke off and fell to the ground. The next thing
Trunks knew, his left shoulder erupted with white hot pain as his
body finally registered the large cut there.
[Kooriichi: I take it, doing this is obligatory is such battles?
WH: Sad to say, yes it is.]
Trunks fell to one knee and bit down to stop the scream that
wanted
to escape his lips. Samaron turned his head to look at him and said,
"I know not why you engaged me in this battle. However, you are not
the one I was waiting for. If you wish to withdraw from this battle
now, I will let you leave."
[WH: {Samaron} We can take a pottie break then come back for more
fighting.]
"A Super Saya-jin," Trunks grunted as he got to his feet and
faced
Samaron with the stump that remained of his sword and favoring his
injured shoulder, "NEVER withdraws. I know that you plan to take on
the Trio. I won't allow it. I won't let you hurt them."
"At the risk of sounding cliched," Samaron replied softly as he
too
turned, "you can not stop me."
[Kooriichi: At least he knows that he's doing this.]
Trunks threw the sword stump at Samaron and the Inner Four
member
used Excaliber to knock it away. Using the brief opening, Trunks
rushed forward and went to strike Samaron with his fists. Samaron
was faster then the Super Saya-jin had expected however and he was
forced to move back as Excaliber rushed towards him, cutting his
shirt but missing the flesh underneath by a hair. Trunks back
flipped several times and then flew up in the air slightly. He
gathered some ki in his hands and let out a wordless yell as he
unleashed a blinding beam of pure ki at Samaron.
[{Kooriichi simply closes her eyes, Reina turns away and winces from the
severity of the light, and WH puts on a pair of MiB raybands and
smiles.}]
From the unofficial sidelines, Lujane gasped as she watched the
beam
storm towards her husband. Would even Excaliber be able to stop that?
[WH: {Quickly} Unless he buys these magazines now! <snicker>
{The sisters give him a glare what for.}]
Samaron swung Excaliber with the flat end facing the ki beam and
batted the attack away. From his position in mid air, Trunks watched
in horror as the beam traveled up into the air and died somewhere in
the night sky. Samaron then aimed Excaliber at Trunks and right
before the energy wave slammed into him and knocked him out cold,
Trunks saw an evil smile spread across the samurai's face.
Lujane rushed from the dugout and embraced Samaron. "That," she
said, "was incredible. Excaliber was truly meant to be yours."
[Kooriichi: {Glow and narrowed eyes again} History would say otherwise.]
"Perhaps," Samaron grudgingly agreed, "but this test is
insuficiant."
A look of confusion passed along Lujanes face for a split
second.
"What do you mean? You defeated one of the ones who..." Lujane
trailed off.
She had turned to indicate where Trunks had been sprawled out
but he
was gone. "Hmph," she groused as she recovered from her surprise,
"The other one is surprisingly fast."
"Yes," Samaron agreed, "I noticed her from the start of the
battle
but her intentions did not concern us so I decided to let her go. In
fact, now that she has witnessed my new power, she will surely tell
the Trio... but that will not stop them from trying to defeat me.
However, if they know of my power or not is of no concern. For no
matter what, they are doomed."
[WH: *YAWN* So you've said for the quadrillionth time..]
TO BE CONTINUED...
[WH: Once more, another chapter and so on. Good job Flashman.
Kooriichi: Yes. Certainly an intreiging way to portray an arrogent fool
such as his samurai.
Reina: Onee-chan, please don't be mean. Whenever I'm mean you bash my
face in, so can you at least be hospitable when I tell you the same
thing?
Kooriichi: Very well. I must admit that I have been acting somewhat
impulsive.
WH: Now, I have an appeal to you in the ML. Very soon, I will be
completed with Legacies Found, my final Tekno xover fic. And I need a
brave MSTer to conquer all +50 of this sucker. It will have the largest
cast with the most collateral damage, casualty rate, and use of arms
ever done in a fic. So be ready!!
{Fades out as WH tries to patch up the theater... again.}]
Teknos Warhammer-
-Knight of the True Fiancee
-Offical Nodoka Saotome Guardian
-Self Proclaimed Guardian of Kiyone Makabi
-Fanfic hero for the Underdogs
-And so much more
View his fanfics at:
http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Garden/4853/index.html
"Special FX by Industrial Light and Morons."
-Michael J. Nelson, MST3K, Space Mutiny
______________________________________________________
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