At 08.54 19.3.1998 -0600, The Eternal Lost Lurker wrote:
(part 1 of 2)
(And meanwhile, back in the jungle. ... Well, not actually the jungle,
but a rather run-down movie theater. The floor is littered with popcorn,
yesterday's newspapers, candy wrappings and other such things.
The seats seem to be much less comfy than they orginally were
and about one third of the lights aren't working. Like I said, a rather
run-down movie theater, but a theater none the less. The door
leading to the theater opens and two figures enter. One is a young
man, perhaps twenty years of age, wearing faded blue jeans,
denim jacket and a Calvin and Hobbes T-shirt. He has a dark brown
hair and looks out to the world behind rather thin eyeglasses.
The other figure is a girl, about fifteen or so, wearing bright red jeans,
yellow shirt and a blue jacket. Her bright, orange hair is kept off her face
by a black headband, and her red eyes sweep around the room.
The girl makes a face.)
Girl:Jussi, where the hell do you find these crappy places?
Young man(apparently Jussi):I'm operating on a tight budget here, Lina.
That's one of the reasons I try to make up weird plots to get us
into theater-like places.
Girl(Lina):And you couldn't come up with anything this time?
Jussi:(defensively) Hey! That math exam was _hard_.
Lina:So it seems. You kept sighing for hours after it. (She starts making
her way towards the back of the theater.) Anyway, are we going to be here
alone?
(Lina shoots a sharp stare at Jussi, who raises his hands up defensively.)
Jussi:No! Somehow Leona heard about this and said that she'd be coming.
Lina:Leona? The tank-nut?
Jussi:Yeah. Anyways, even if she wasn't, do you think I'd try anything?
Lina:Guess not.
(The pair has made their way to the back of the thater. Lina sits down in the
middle of the back row and kicks the worst of the trash aside. Jussi takes
a place two seats to the right from her.)
Lina:(looks around) Come to think of it, where did you get get the money
to rent this place? Your bank account was empty the last time I checked.
(Jussi starts sweating.)
Jussi:Well... About that...
Lina:(quirks an eyebrow and gets a dangerous look on her face)About that...
Jussi:(sweating more)Umm... Sore wa himitsu desu.
Lina:(sighs) Fireball.
(Jussi is engulfed in flames.)
Jussi:@_@ Itai...
(While Jussi is still trying to recover from being fireballed the doors to
the theater open again, and two identical, over six feet tall, blond, busty
girls with cat ears, wearing police uniforms, walk in. They are carrying a
box full of burt circuitry boards, fried transistors and other such things.)
Girl#1:Sheesh! Ain't this place a mess or something?
Girl#2:Yeah! Even that alley where we used to live was neater!
Girl#1:Not to mention cleaner!
Girl#2(looks a bit confused): Ain't cleaners those old ladies who, like,
come and
with those mops and stuff to scrub the stations' floor every night?
Girl#1:(shrugs)Whatever, Uni. Now, where's the movie?
Girl#2(Uni):Dunno, Anna. Maybe we ask the kid there.
(Lina, who was, until now, looking at the two new arrivals with some confusion
and quite a bit of envy, suddenly starts looking a little angry. At the same
time Jussi pushes himself up.)
Jussi:(still looking more than a little beaten)The Puma Sisters? What the hell
are they doing here?
Anna:(shouting) Hey you guys back there! Do you know when the movie's
supposed to start!?
Jussi:Movie?
Uni:Yeah! Boss-lady said that there was this movie here and it was completely
free, so we thought that we'd come here too, you know.
Jussi:(rubs his forehead)I guess there's a movie here...
Lina:(stops Jussi and whispers to him)You're going to let them stay?
Jussi:(whispers back) I don't want to try and throw them out.
(Meanwhile, Anna and Uni, squaling in delight, come and take seats,
right before Lina and Jussi, putting the box full of burnt electronics parts
on the seat between them. Lina briefly seems to consider blasting them,
but then opts to use a spell to fly to the row in front of the catgirls.
Grumbling, Jussi makes his way there too.)
Jussi:Anyway, where's Leona?
Anna:(while munching on a fuse) Last I saw boss-lady she was still polishin'
her tank. Said something about there being the support staff having a fly
epidemic or something.
Uni:What's flies got to do with anything?
Anna:(shrugs) Dunno, maybe there's too many and they can't work 'cause
of all that buzzing.
(In the row before them, Lina grits her teeth, and decides not to blast the two
blonde bimbos. At least not yet.)
Anna:(pokes at Jussi) Hey you. When's this movie starting?
Jussi:(nervously adjusts his glasses.) Well, about now, actually, since Leona's
not coming. But it's not a movie really, but a fanfic.
Uni:Fanfic? What's that?
Jussi:Well, it's... (considers a moment) kinda hard to explain, okay. Just
watch.
(The Puma Sisters look at each other and shrug as the lights on the theater
are killed.)
Author's Notes:
Okay, the length of chapter 23 in draft form became utterly
Uni:Hey, what's this stuff?
Anna:Some kind of commercial?
(A vein on Lina's forehead comes visible and she grits her teeth more.)
Lina:(thinking)I will not blast them. I already have to pay for several burnt
chairs. I won't blast them...
Anna:(pokes Jussi again)Hey you! ... What is your name anyway?
Jussi:(turns to look at Anna) Huh? Umm... Jussi.
Anna:'Kay, Jussi. What's this stuff?
Jussi:Authors notes. It's kinda like the opening credits on a movie.
Anna:Oh, right. So where are all the actors' names and stuff, then?
(Lina has had enough, it seems, as she turns around as fast as she can.)
Lina:MEGABRUNTO!!!!
Anna & Uni:Eeeep!
(The Pumas are engulfed in flame now. Lina turns back to look at the screen.)
Lina: I feel _much_ better.
(Jussi starts sweating a little.)
ridiculous, so I decided to break it into two chapters. What follows
is the complete draft of chapter 23. Chapter 24 is approximately 75%
complete, and will be posted during the weekend.
Jussi: Yearight.
(Lina nods.)
(We can see that the Puma Sisters are sprawled down, halfway
on the floor. Their eyes are spinning.)
These two chapters will be the last visit to Cephiro for a while.
Chapter 25 will be the last chapter of Act Four, and will focus on
the Magic Knights back on Earth as they prepare for their journey to
China. Act Five will focus solely on the Knights as they travel
across China to find the second Fire Mashin.
Jussi:Well, it's nice to know what's coming.
Lina:I wonder what's the need to explain the plot beforehand.
Doesn't serve any purpose.
(Groans are heard behind Jussi and Lina as the two cat androids are
starting to awake.)
Uni:Owowowow... That, like, _hurt_!
Anna:(Leaning to the back of Jussi's seat for support) Did we miss anything?
Lina:No.
I'm afraid this chapter won't have a whole lot of action in it...it's
going to be mostly extensive descriptions and dialogue. Chapter 24
Jussi:As long as it ain't too corny, I can manage.
Lina:(blinks) I thought you like corny.
Jussi:Yeah, but it's much easier to like if it's on screen.
Lina:This _is_ on screen.
Jussi:(flatly) You know what I mean.
will have significant action. C&C/MST ifyalike.
Lina:Is this why we're doing this?
Jussi:Maybe.
Chapter 23: Edosel Canyon
"Ready guys? Let's do it!"
Jussi:Somehow, when a chapter starts like this, I get a baaad feeling...
Five figures stood silhouetted in the late afternoon sun, the wind
tossing their hair as it tossed granules of lavender sand about them.
Simultaenously, the five figures dropped into modified ready stances,
and began performing various motions with their arms.
Uni:Hey! This is just like that stupid show you like watching, Anna! You know,
that super-magical-mutant-ninja-ranger -thingy!
Anna:It's Magical Super Mutant Ranger Ninja Team Gamma! And it's not
a stupid show, unlike that soap _you_ watch. That purple road thingy.
Uni:It's Kimangure Orange Road, and it ain't stupid!
Lina:Shut up! (blasts them again.)
"We fight for the defenseless!" a male voice cried out, as one of
the figures stepped forward, now performing solo arm gestures.
Lina:(blinks) I thought this was supposed to a MKR/Ranma fic, not
sentai...
As the first figure finished, a second stepped forth, and began
posturing as well. "To protect the good from the evil!" a female
voice said.
"We bring justice on those who make innocent suffer!" another female
voice declared, as a third figure began posing.
Jussi:If this is what I think it is, I'm going to be sick.
"We'll right wrongs and triumph over evil!" a male voice declared,
as the fourth figure stepped forward, robes rustling in the wind.
The first four figures stepped back, as the fifth raised a fist to
the sky. "Forces of evil beware! For we are..."
With a final round of hand gestures, the five shouted in unison,
"MAGIC SENTAI!"
(Jussi pauses the tape and stands up.)
Anna (who seems to have recovered from Lina's spell):Hey! What did you
do that for!
Jussi:Just please wait for a minute.
Uni:(pokes Lina) Hey, can you start the movie again, kid?
Lina:He's got the remote.
Anna:Aww, shoot! Anyway, what's he doin'?
(Jussi has walked to the nearest wall. Upon reaching it, he starts
banging his head against it.)
Uni:(blinks) Doesn't that hurt?
(Jussi stops banging his head)
Jussi:It's supposed to. Too corny...
(Soon, Jussi walks back to his seat and the fanfic continues)
Nearby, Cologne and Clef developed massive sweatdrops.
"Are...they...always like this?" Clef asked slowly.
Cologne sighed, and put her hand to her forehead. "To think,even
with all the time they spend fighting amongst each other back home,
they still manage to watch too much television..."
Anna:(pokes Jussi's shoulder again)Who are all these people?
Jussi:The main cast.
(Anna blinks)
Anna:So why're they actin' like we know 'em already? Aren't they supposed
to be, you know, introduced?
Jussi:(sighs) This is part 23.
Anna:Oh. So who are they?
(Jussi gives Anna the short synopses and list of main characters he had made for
Leona.)
"I like it," Ryouga said.
"Works for me," Ukyou agreed.
"Silly Japanese watching too too many corny TV show," Shampoo said.
Lina:You got that part right.
Jussi:But that's about the only thing that seems to be right here.
Lina:At least they don't get tailor-made special effects to the background like
Amelia.
Jussi:Well, a volcano erupting behind them would work wonders here. But
I'm not talking about special effects.
Mousse smirked. "And *who* is it that stays cranky for a whole week
if she misses a single episode of one of those shows?"
Uni:Kinda like you, Anna?
(Anna pouts.)
Shampoo flushed crimson. "Shampoo no knowing what stupid Mousse
talking," she said. The others snickered.
"Well, it may be a little on the corny side, but it works..." Akane
Jussi:A _little_? There was enough pure cornity there for several episodes
of Sailor Moon!
Lina:Cornity?
Jussi:Forget it.
said, shrugging. "At the very least, it's bound to confuse our
enemies long enough for us to gain an advantage."
Lina:(blinks) She may have a point, you know. Hmm...
Suddenly, the jewels on their wrist guards flashed. The weapons
they'd borrowed from Presea shimmered into existence in the air
before them, before vanishing entirely.
"Aiyah! What happen?" Shampoo wondered.
Uni:Duhh! Your weapons disappeared! Even I could figure that out!
"What happened," called the voice of Presea from the entrance to her
special wagon, "is I finished creating your new weapons." She walked
out of the wagon, grinning. "Go ahead, summon them."
Uni:Who is she, Anna?
Anna:Uhh... (tries to read the text in the dark) I think she's the butcher.
Or a hunter.
(Uni blinks)
Anna:It says here that she likes to kill rabbits.
"Finished already? Wow!" Akane said. "Err, how do we summon them?"
"Just concentrate on your weapons," Presea said. "They will come to
you."
Jussi:Concentrate, concentrate. Feel the force flowing around you...
(Lina thwaps Jussi.)
Akane frowned, then closed her eyes, stretching her hand above her
head. Although the sky was cloudless, a bolt of lightning lanced from
the sky, striking her arm. As the bolt struck, it began to condense,
and soon solidified into a gleaming katana. The hilt of the katana
was golden, and sculpted into the shape of a sleeping tiger. The
guard, however, resembled a series of intertwined, stylized lightning
bolts. She brought the sword down to eye level, and examined it.
"Sugoi," she breathed.
Anna:Cool!
Jussi:(to himself) Maybe, but when they all take out their weapons, one
after another, it starts to get a little old...
Mousse's hand began glowing white as he concentrated. The glow
stretched outward from his hand, and a shining falchion formed. The
Jussi:What's a falchion?
Lina:A sword.
hilt of the falchion resembled folded, feathery wings. He grinned as
he took a few practice swings with the sword.
A tall column of rock erupted from the ground at Ryouga's feet. He
blinked. The stone column exploded, spraying fragments of gravel in
all directions. When the dust cleared, everyone gaped. Before Ryouga,
its point buried in the ground, stood a massive, stone-hilted
claidhmore. Ryouga hesitantly gripped the hilt of the gigantic sword,
Jussi:(turns to Lina)Claidhmore?
(Lina hands Jussi a copy of "Beginner's Guide To Swords And Other Melee
Weapons")
and drew it from the ground. Several jaws hung open as the blade
continued to come forth, until Ryouga finally hefted six feet of
glistening steel. "Now *this* is more like it," Ryouga said.
Jussi:That's not a knife. This is a...
(Lina thwaps Jussi again.)
Unnoticed by all, the gem on his gauntlet turned brown.
Anna:(claps her hands) I know! I know! This is that foreshadowing -thingy!
Shampoo's shadow chose that moment to begin moving of its own
volition. a Chinese broadsword appeared in its hand as it attained a
third dimension. "Aiyah," Shampoo said as her shadow stood before
her. It reversed its grip on the sword, and offered it hilt-first to
the Amazon, who hesitantly took it. The sword ceased to be a shadow;
Lina:Not very practical, you know. You could have been sliced and diced
several times already...
Jussi:And how's it with you and your Laguna Blade?
Lina:Point.
however, it remained jet black from hilt to tip. The black blade
somehow seemed to suck up the light around it, as did the glistening
onyx hilt of the sword. Soundlessly, Shampoo's shadow reverted to its
two-dimensional origins, and slid back into its proper place. The gem
on Shampoo's glove turned black.
(Uni takes a bite off an old hard disk. <C*R*U*N*C*H>
Jussi and Lina turn to glare at her. Uni blinks and shrugs.)
Ukyou grimaced. "Jeez, looks like swords are the rule around here,
huh?"
Presea smiled. "I wouldn't say that..."
With little fanfare, a silver glimmer appeared in Ukyou's hand,
slowly stretching into a long, thin line. It continued to stretch
until it reached Ukyou's height, at which the ends began to curve
slightly. One bright silver flash later, Ukyou was holding a silver,
double-bladed naginata. She spun it for a moment, and shrugged. "Not
bad," she said. The gem on her gauntlet flickered, and turned silver.
This time, someone noticed.
Jussi: I don't believe it.
Anna:What?
Jussi:(blinks, and turns halfway around) It's just that usually they
notice things like that only when it's too late.
Anna:(nods) Yeah. (starts thinking) Gee, I wonder why that always happens...
(Jussi sighs and buries his head in his hands.)
"Hey, Ukyou...your jewel just changed color," Akane said.
Ukyou blinked. "Yeah, it has."
"Aiyah! Shampoo gem change color too."
"So did mine," Ryouga said. "Anyone else?"
Lina:You know, this is most definitely stock dialogue, straight out of
a fifties B-movie. About as orginal as that "He's been murdered!"
"Somebody must have done it!" line.
Jussi: I wonder how many got that reference...
"Not mine," Mousse said. Akane shook her head in the negative.
Presea frowned thoughtfully. "Hmm," she said at length, "it might be
because of..." she trailed off, and stared into the distance. The
others followed her gaze, to see nothing in particular except
countless kilometers of amethyst sand...except for an unexpected gap
on the horizon.
Jussi:(blinks) There's a part of horizons where there's no horizon?
(Anna and Uni look at each other, confused)
Anna:What did he say?
Uni:Beats me.
"What is it, Presea-san?" Ryouga asked.
Presea pointed off into the desert. "Do you see that place on the
horizon where the sand ends so abruptly? That is the deepest, widest
crevice in all of Cephiro, Edosel Canyon. It is a very special part
of Cephiro, though it is seldom disturbed."
Lina: It's nice when all they need is so close together. Almost... convenient.
Jussi:Like the author didn't bother to write them travelling anywhere?
Lina:Exactly.
"What's down there?" Akane asked.
"The Graveyard of Mashin," Clef spoke up from behind the group.
(Jussi and Lina groan, while Uni looks confused.)
Uni:(whispers to Anna) What's a mashin?
Anna:Ain't that what you call all those things that do the work for you?
"The WHAT!?" the five teens chorused.
Anna:(winces) Why can't humans ever keep their voice down when they're
surprised?
Uni:Well, at least they didn't scream, you know.
Anna:(nods) Yeah.
"Throughout the history of Cephiro, many Mashin have been born, have
seen many conflicts, and have lost their bearers, or been destroyed.
While the Mashin worn by the Magic Knights rest in ancient shrines,
due to their...special role in Cephiro," Clef coughed nervously, "the
other Mashin have no holy resting sites...except for this place.
Edosel Canyon."
Jussi:And I guess that they leave to a mysterious journey there once they
have taken the fatal blow?
"So...this canyon is basically a junkyard for derelicts?" Mousse
asked.
"Pretty much," Presea agreed. "The remains of destroyed Mashin, the
sleeping Mashin whose wearers have long since faded from this life,
the Mashin which were abandoned for various reasons...all rest within
the canyon."
Lina:Dunno. Since the Mashin are machines (Jussi groans at this point)
they might be teleported there or something.
Jussi:Why?
Lina:Dramatic necessity.
Uni:(blinks) What?
Lina:Nevermind...
"So...what's that got to do with us?" Ukyou asked.
Clef waved his staff in the direction of Edosel Canyon. "Many of the
Mashin which lie below are long since dead. However, many more of
them are simply at rest, repairing their damage from ancient battles,
awaiting the time when another comes along who will wear them." He
whirled, pointing his staff at the five martial artists. "You," he
declared.
"Us?" Akane asked.
Presea nodded. "The impending danger here has undoubtedly caught the
attention of those Mashin who lie in wait for a return to service.
Your presence, and the Escudo weapons you now possess, have probably
been noticed." She gestured expansively. "As we speak, there may well
be five Mashin in Edosel Canyon who have awakened, and await the ones
who will wear them."
Uni:So now they're gonna get these mashines to do the work for them?
Anna:Naah! I think they are kinda like some sort of fantasy tanks, you know.
Uni:Like boss-lady's Bonaparte?
Anna:Yeah.
Uni:Why are they called mashines then?
Anna:Dunno. One of those weird fantasy worlds where they invent new words,
I suppose.
"Aiyah! You want us pilot big robots?" Shampoo asked.
Jussi:Makes sense. After all, they are still children.
(Lina thwaps Jussi again.)
"It makes sense," Mousse said. "Something dangerous is
coming...remember the warning Rayearth gave us before the others went
back to Earth? If they need to wake that other Mashin in China, then
chances are the rest of us will need our own Mashins as well."
Lina:Mechas are overrated.
Jussi:I don't think the Orichalcon Golem was a good example, you know...
"So...what do we do?" Ryouga asked.
Ferio leaned out of his wagon. "I'd suggest we make haste to Edosel
Canyon, and see if there are a few old Mashin that are ready to
protect Cephiro once again."
Jussi:I hope the mecha are cool, since you just gave out the plot for what's
left
of this chapter...
The caravan rolled to a halt half a kilometer from the rim of Edosel
Canyon. The Magic Sentai, Ferio, Presea, Clef, and Cologne piled out
of the wagons, and stood staring at the great crevice.
Lina:Ten bucks says they found a dramatic cliffside to stand on.
Jussi:I don't take sucker bets, you know.
"Wow," Ukyou said.
"Reminds me of something I saw back home," Ryouga said.
Akane blinked. "There aren't any canyons in Japan, are there?"
Mousse chuckled. "Maybe it was that one in America." Everyone from
Earth broke into laughter, except Ryouga.
"And what's so funny? I can't help it that I never remembered
crossing any oceans..." Ryouga said. The laughter ended abruptly, and
the group stared at the lost boy.
"Well, if you're prepared," Presea said, "it's time to go down and
take a look through the Graveyard."
Lina:How come this feels like a parody of a bad horror movie?
(Jussi blinks)
Lina:You know, going to a graveyard and stuff. I bet there's a gag about
splitting
up later on.
Ferio stepped forward. "I'll be going as well."
"Your Highness, you mustn't," Clef protested.
Jussi:(sighs) You were right about those B-movies, Lina...
Ferio shook his head vigorously. "My land, my people...my
sister...they're all in danger. I refuse to sit idly by and let
someone else fight my battles for me, without joining in."
Uni:Ain't it noble...
Anna:Stupid, though. There's no money in saving the world.
(Uni nods.)
Cologne placed a hand on Clef's shoulder. "I suggest you let this
one do as he wishes," she advised. "He's got a strong fighting
spirit; his help will no doubt be useful in the coming struggle."
Jussi:(Yoda voice) Strong in the force he is...
(Jussi blinks since Lina doesn't thwap him.)
Clef thought for a moment, then nodded. "Very well. I feel I must
forewarn all of you: awakening and gaining the power of the Mashin
will not be easy. You must face this with your mind and heart open
and aware."
"Also," Presea chimed in, "I'm not sure how those new armors will
react to the Mashin. Your armors may change radically once the Mashin
are awakened."
Jussi:Of course they'll change. This is a CLAMP world after all.
(starts imitating a Standard Macho Guy) Ha! My shoulderguards are
bigger than yours!
"Will that affect their protection?" Mousse asked.
Presea shook her head. "If anything, it should strengthen them."
"Well, let's go then!" Akane shouted, running for the rim of the
canyon. The others joined her, while Presea and the two Gurus
remained behind.
Lina:At least they didn't all strike their fist to the air and shout "YEAH!"
As the group approached the vast crevice, Akane slowed, and knelt at
the edge, staring in wide-eyed wonder. "Wow," she breathed. The
others caught up with her, and took a look at what had awed her.
As far as the eye could see, Edosel Canyon was packed with mecha.
(Anna and Uni start to drool.)
There were mecha with gleaming metal skin, their armored hulls
slightly dinged, and in some cased dented badly; there were others
which had rusted through and were full of holes. Here and there, a
(Anna and Uni start to drool heavily and eat faster.)
piece of some unfortunate mecha lay among the rubble, trailing bits
of metal and circuitry. Thousands of different colors and textures of
metal lay before them, in a vast river of derelict technology.
"Aiyah," Shampoo breathed. "Is like junkyard one see in future-type
anime."
"Yeah, you sure don't see somethin' like this every day," Ukyou
said.
"I wonder how many of them even still work..." Ryouga mused.
Jussi:Deeper and deeper into stock dialogue we travel...
"Let's get down there and find out," Ferio said. The six of them
leapt down into the canyon, struggling for foot purchase amongst the
heaps of scrap. "Spread out," Ferio instructed. "There's no danger
here, we can afford to split up. We have a better chance of finding
functional Mashin this way." Within moments, the six had lost sight
of each other, picking through the rubble with determination.
(Lina looks at Jussi. They both sigh.)
Jussi:Well, it wasn't a gag really...
Akane shuddered as she walked past what appeared to have once been a
mecha helmet. About half of it was still intact; its surface was done
in purple tones, and a broken horn jutted from its forehead. A
Jussi:Is it...
shattered metal jaw hung from the helmet, reminding Akane entirely
too much of images of damaged skulls she'd seen. She carefully walked
Jussi:It is...
Anna:What? What?
Jussi:The obligatory Evangelion reference.
(Anna blinks, confused.)
past it, as though afraid some demon would awaken within it and cause
it to attack her.
After a few moments of picking through the rubble, Akane felt an odd
tingle. She looked about, and noticed that a large sheet of plating
that had torn loose from something was rattling. She cast a minor
lightning spell, which blasted the plating across the canyon. The
Jussi:(blinks) Why didn't she just move it by hand?
Lina:Probably since they haven't had a chance to use their magic in this
chapter yet.
Jussi:Oh, right, of course.
Lina:Dramatic necessity.
tingling intensified; Akane summoned her katana just to be on the
safe side. As she neared the rubble that had been buried beneath the
plating, a massive metal paw shot up through the debris. She
screamed, falling backwards.
(Anna and Uni scream too, grabbing each other.)
"WHO DISTURBS MY SLUMBER?" rumbled a voice. The mounds of scrap
trembled.
Akane scrambled backward. "Ummm...I'm sorry? I..."
"SILENCE," the voice boomed. After a pause, it continued, "I
SENSE...THOU ART A WARRIOR."
Lina:Wow, it has the dramatic pauses and all. This gotta be important.
"Umm...yeah, I guess so," Akane said.
"YOU POSSESS A WEAPON OF ESCUDO."
Jussi:Wasn't it just talking with thees and thous?
"Yes, yes I do," Akane said, regaining her footing. She held her
katana aloft.
"PERHAPS THOU HAST COME TO THIS SACRED RESTING GROUND, IN THE
HOPES
OF AWAKENING A MASHIN TO WEAR?" the voice inquired.
Uni:You _wear_ a mashin? You sure these weren't clothes or anything, Anna?
(Anna is studying the synopses she got from Jussi)
Anna:Wait... Here it is. Mashin are those mecha-thingy!
Uni:Oh. Cool.
Akane found the rest of her wits at this point. "Yes, that's right.
I'm here to find a Mashin."
"AND FOR WHAT PURPOSE WOULDST THOU WEAR THE MASHIN?"
Jussi:What... is thy quest?
(This time Lina does thwap Jussi.)
"Cephiro's in trouble. A lot of people are going to be hurt, maybe
killed, if whoever's attacking this place isn't stopped."
"I SEE. YOU SEEK TO DEFEND THIS WORLD WHICH IS NOT YOUR OWN."
"How...how did you...?"
"KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT OF CEPHIRO? THIS IS SOMETHING THAT THE
MASHIN
ARE ABLE TO SENSE," the voice responded, with a touch of amusement
Jussi:Too bad it can't sense that it's in a B-movie.
this time. "I SHOULD ADVISE YOU, THAT IF YOU ARE ATTEMPTING TO BECOME
A MAGIC KNIGHT..."
Jussi:Here's the yous again.
"Oh...no," Akane said. "The Magic Knights already awakened their
Mashin quite some time ago. It's a long story," she said.
"INDEED? I MUST LEARN OF THIS STORY SOME TIME," the voice rumbled.
Jussi:You just learned of it, but I think telling the whole thing ain't
gonna happen
in this fanfic. (pause) Thank heavens.
"HOWEVER, FIRST WE MUST DEAL WITH THE MATTER AT HAND. I SENSE THINE
MAGIC CONTROLS THE CLOUDS IN THE HEAVENS."
"That's right, I have storm and lightning magic," Akane said.
"THEN IT IS THINE POWER WHICH HAS AWAKENED ME." Suddenly, the rubble
Jussi:What an amazing coincidence.
shifted, and Akane lost her footing again as a massive form burst
>from the debris with a mighty roar. Akane sat, stunned, as a massive
yellow tiger stood before her. "I AM CALLED TORA," the tiger said.
Anna:Cool!
Uni:It's a cat! Just like us!
Jussi:(to Lina) Thank heavens it isn't red and have a hair wilder than Washuu's.
Lina:I think that was a demon...
"IN AGES PAST I HAVE BEEN WORN BY THUNDER MAGES. NOW, I AM THINE TO
WEAR."
"You're...you're really a Mashin!" Akane exclaimed.
"WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU EXPECT TO BE BURIED IN A GRAVEYARD OF
MASHIN?"
Jussi:Dunno, elephants?
Tora asked, amusement in his rumbling voice.
Akane laughed nervously. "Yeah, um, right. I'm Tendou Akane. Do you
think we can help the others find Mashin now?"
"THEIR MASHIN WILL COME TO THEM, WHEN THEY COME TO THE RESTING
PLACE
OF THE MASHIN," Tora told her. "FOR NOW, WE CAN ONLY WAIT ABOVE, IN
THE DESERT."
"Alright...our caravan is that way," Akane said, pointing.
Tora shook his head. "NO. WE MUST WAIT UPON THE OTHER BANK OF THE
CANYON."
"Huh? Why?" Akane asked.
Tora lowered his head. "I AM PART OF A UNIT OF MASHIN WHICH FOUGHT
TOGETHER IN AGES PAST. IF WHAT I SENSE IS CORRECT, THE REST OF MY
UNIT IS AWAKENING...INCLUDING OUR LEADER. IF THE LEADER IS AWAKENED,
Jussi:Take me to your leader.
HE WILL SEE FIT TO TEST THE METTLE OF THOSE WHO WOULD WEAR US. IF
SUCH A TEST COMES TO PASS, IT MUST BE ON THE SIDE OF THE CANYON WHERE
THE LEADER SLEEPS."
Anna:I wonder if their leader's a cat too?
Akane blinked, then shrugged. "You'd know better than I would," she
said, as she jumped onto the tiger's back. Tora blinked his glowing
eyes, but said nothing, opting to leap for the rim of Edosel Canyon.
"AAAGGGGHHH!!! Where the hell is it?" Ryouga bellowed, as he drove a
fist through...a fist. "I don't even know what I'm looking for! This
is nuts!"
Jussi:Like's it's something new you're not finding what you're looking for...
Something snuffled behind him. He spun, but saw nothing. "Who's
there? Show yourself!"
The snuffle came again. Ryouga roared, and drove his fist deep into
the pile of metal beneath him.
This time, he heard snorting laughter. "CAREFUL THERE, SOME OF THESE
USED TO BE FRIENDS OF MINE," rumbled a deep voice, punctuated by
occasional snorts. Ryouga froze, and slowly turned.
Standing less than a meter away was the largest brown boar he'd ever
seen. "GYAAAAAAAAAH!!!" he shouted as he leapt backward, summoning
his claidhmore.
(Again, Anna and Uni scream and grab each other.)
The boar narrowed its eyes, steam puffing around its tusks. "AN
ESCUDO SWORD," it said. "TELL ME, DO YOU SEEK TO AWAKEN A MASHIN
HERE?"
"That's right," Ryouga said uncertainly. He peered inquisitively at
the boar. "Who...or what, are you?"
Anna:It's a metal pig!
Uni:Yeah! But at least it ain't as filthy as real ones.
Anna:(blinks) You've seen real pigs?
Uni:Yeah, there was this TV-show where there were these, like, huge pigs that
were fighting in this muddy ring-thingy.
The boar's laughter sent gouts of steam drifting in front of
Ryouga's face. "YOU SEEK SOMETHING, YET KNOW NOT WHEN YOU HAVE FOUND
IT."
Ryouga blinked. "You...*you're* a Mashin?"
Uni:That one ain't got no style.
"THAT IS CORRECT," the boar said, effecting a porcine bow. "I AM
KJATA, AN EARTH ELEMENTAL MASHIN. THE POWER OF YOUR FIGHTING SPIRIT,
COMBINED WITH YOUR POSSESSION OF AN ESCUDO WEAPON AND AURA OF
EARTH
MAGIC, AWAKENED ME FROM MY SLUMBER."
Jussi:Oh, how dramatic.
Ryouga's shoulder slumped. "Perfect. I awaken the Mashin, and it's a
pig."
Lina:You can't say that it doesn't suit you.
"HEY! LET'S NOT GET PERSONAL, OKAY?" Kjata huffed.
Ryouga sighed. "Sorry, sorry...it's just, I have a problem with
pigs." He closed his eyes and concentrated. After a moment, he shrank
into his P-chan form. His sword fell, burying itself to the hilt in a
broken mecha torso.
Anna:(blinks) He just turned into a pig?
Uni:A cute pig though.
Anna:Still weird. (starts reading the character info again.)
Kjata blinked. "WHAT IN THE WORLD--?"
Ryouga transformed back. "I can control that here in Cephiro, but
when I'm in my own world, it's a curse. Cold water transforms me into
a piglet, and hot water changes me back."
"INTERESTING. ALTHOUGH I DON'T SEE HOW BEING A PIG COULD BE
CALLED A
CURSE..."
"Of course not...you're an enormous boar. Do you know how many
cookpots I get tossed into?" Ryouga demanded.
(Anna and Uni look at each other and burst out laughing.)
Anna:Are those humans stupid or what?
Uni:Yeah, even we know you hafta kill the pig before cooking it!
Kjata made a sound of comprehension, and nodded. "I...SEE. WELL
THEN, SOMETIMES-PORCINE ONE..." Ryouga glared at the boar, "I SENSE
(Lina snickers. Suddenly, a blur shots through the theater, grabs the snicker,
eats it, leaving only a crushed snickers wrapping.)
Lina:What was _that_?
Jussi:A stupid pun and an obligatory cameo.
THAT ANOTHER OF MY UNIT HAS AWAKENED. LET US GO INVESTIGATE." With a
clanking, grinding sound, a hatch slid open on the Mashin's back,
sending up a cloud of purple dust. "CLIMB ABOARD," Kjata said. Ryouga
picked up his sword, banished it, and leapt onto the Mashin's back.
He discovered a cockpit where the hatch had opened, and slid into it.
With Ryouga secured, Kjata leapt for the edge of the Canyon, and
charged along the sand.
Jussi:You know, that name, Kjata bothers me.
Lina:How so?
Jussi:Maybe it's just becouse there's this Finnish girl's name, Katja...
Mousse was in heaven.
Lina:Good. Then he won't be around spilling off bad dialogue.
Sure, he had no idea what it was he was actually *looking* for, but
he was finding a lot of useful stuff as he dug through the rubble in
the canyon. Every few minutes, a surplus mecha part would disappear
into his robes, everything from shards of armor to sharp-toothed
gears, and even a few mecha weapons. "I seem to have virtually
Anna:Why's he storing all that food?
Uni:Dunno. I didn't know humans can eat that stuff.
Anna:(shrugs) Maybe he's an android too, or something.
Uni:You don't know?
Anna:You try reading (holds up the papers Jussi gave her) this when there's
no light.
infinite storage space here," he commented to himself. "This could
come in handy. Hmmm...I wonder if I can convince Presea-san to loan
me some of those chains again." Even as he thought this, he picked up
a long coil of something resembling bicycle chain.
"DOING A LITTLE SHOPPING, BOY?" a voice rang out. There was an odd
quality to the voice, like the cries of a water fowl.
Uni:Weren't they supposed to be in a graveyard, not a store?
Mousse snapped his head up, and peered around. His now-keen eyesight
noticed a section of the debris moving. "That's right," he said. "I
was just about to check out."
"YOU SHALL BE CHECKING OUT, INDEED, IF YOU DO NOT REPLACE THOSE
OBJECTS WHERE THEY BELONG."
Mousse summoned his falchion, wielding it in his right hand while he
produced three sharp gears with his left. "Sorry, I need this stuff.
I've got a lot of fighting to do in the near future..."
Jussi:I seriously doubt that would do you any good against a Mashin...
"ESCUDO," the voice said. "YOU WIELD ESCUDO."
"That's right," Mousse said.
Lina:These people have an incredible skill of saying the obvious.
The mound of mecha erupted before him. With a mighty cry, a large
white crane rose from the debris. It circled above Mousse, its grand
wings creating a powerful wind. "YOU ARE NOT A SCAVENGER, THEN, OR A
COMMON THIEF. NONE SUCH AS THAT COULD WIELD THE LEGENDARY MINERAL
OF
CEPHIRO."
Anna:(blinks) I thought if was called escu-something.
Uni:Dunno. I think Cefiro was the name of that country they're in.
"I've come to seek a Mashin, so that I can fight to defend Cephiro
>from a powerful evil force," Mousse said. He narrowed his eyes. "I
Jussi:And protect the innocent and rid the world of evil...
Lina:I'm not going to bother thwapping you for that.
take it you're one of the Mashin?"
"THAT IS CORRECT," the crane squawked. "I AM SUTRAN, THE MASHIN OF
THE TRUE LIGHT."
"I am Mousse, a visitor to this world, and master of the art of
Hidden Weapons."
Sutran flew closer, and landed, examining Mousse intently. "HIDDEN
WEAPONS?"
Jussi:dden weapons... en weapons... eapons... pons... pons...
Anna:(looking around)Was there echo?
(Lina groans)
Mousse banished the gears, and produced various other surplus he'd
salvaged. "I secret weapons on my person to use in combat."
"I SEE. A VERY USEFUL TALENT. I SENSE YOU POSSESS THE POWER OF THE
TRUE LIGHT."
"The white light magic? That's right, I do."
"VERY WELL THEN. I PERMIT YOU TO RETAIN THE THINGS YOU HAVE
GATHERED
HERE, AND I SHALL ACCOMPANY YOU ON YOUR JOURNEYS, THAT YOU MAY WEAR
ME INTO BATTLE."
"I would be honored," Mousse said. "Now, we need to rendezvous with
the others."
Jussi:Actually, it's a good think Mousse wasn't really in heaven since he seems
to be the only one who has anyting intelligent to say.
"YES, I SENSE THAT SOME OF MY FELLOW MASHIN HAVE AWAKENED."
Lina:Figures they're all of the same unit.
Jussi:Dramatic necessity?
Lina:And the law of clichee.
Mousse rubbed his chin. "So, the others are having luck as well." He
leapt into the air, and landed on Sutran's back. "Let's go meet up
with the others then." Sutran gave a mighty shriek, and took to the
skies.
Jussi:(starts singing. Badly) Himiwo himiwo aaa-ishiteru. Yaakusookuu...
(This time Anna and Uni thwap him.)
Uni:That was, like, horrible!
-----------
The Martian.
Jussi.Nikander@alien.nixu.fi
-----------
"Curses! Foiled again!"
-Skuld