Ranma Al'Thor wrote:
Hmmm. I have some straight commentary on this, but first a minor point.
Ukyou shuddered. "So they only train women there?"
"Men who channel go mad." Ranma-chan paused in her
exercises and fell silent.
"But you..."
"Girl-form only. I couldn't channel a candle alight in
male form and I'm glad." When it didn't gall her, anyway. It
was completely unfair. "The last time they fought the Dark
One, who's this big nasty evil guy they locked up under a
mountain or something, he somehow buggered up magic for all
guys. Drives them all mad and they kill everyone they know."
Ukyou suddenly didn't feel so bad that he couldn't
channel. "But isn't the Dragon a male channeler?" He stirred
the rabbit stew slowly as it warmed.
"Well, you kinda go mad by inches, I guess. Rand seemed
pretty sane when I met him." Ranma-chan said, returning to
her exercises.
I'm not really clear on the timeline here. How long have Ranma and
Ukyou been traveling together? If it's been any serious length of time
(say more than three days), I can't believe he wouldn't have told her
these things before. Either Ukyou would have asked about channeling or
Ranma would have volunteered the information. If it has been a while, I
would suggest simply converting the scene into a brief flashback.
As I remember from last time John, there's a rather convluted story
about how this fanfic came to be. The result was that a considerable
amount of the story had already happened by the point where "Parallel
Lives" begins. Would you consider going back and actually writing that
story for those of us who weren't on Ranma MUX? I'd like to know more
about how they first came to Randland and how Ukyou and Akane got curses
and got split. You telling it to people who ask isn't the same thing.
If you don't want to do that, at least write a detailed "what has gone
before" to append to the beginning of the chapters.
Now comments on Part 4. Obviously this part deals extensively with the
issue of gender and sexual orientation. Ranma certainly had a sense of
desperation about her as she insisted to Akane that "she" was still a
boy underneath it all. Quite naturally, since she did indeed feel her
masculinity slipping away.
However, Akane had was just as desperate, if in a more quiet manner.
She told Akane that "you're a girl now" and insisted that "Kaneda" was
very real and a permanent part of her. She too had a very good reason
to be desperate. After all, what was she going to do if Ranma still
felt as much a "boy" as ever? Akane would feel that her feminimity had
slipped away from her when she could have done something to prevent it.
It was just as important to Akane that "he" be be right as it was to
Ranma that "she" be right.
What I found disappointing was that the issue was so clearly settled.
All three of the people that had their gender "permanently" changed
found their sexual orientation inevitably switching as well. What's
strange about that is that very rare is the situation that everyone will
react exactly the same to. People are different, and will respond in
different ways to events of such importance.
For instance, I at least would have found it more interesting if only
_two_ of the three felt their orientations changing and felt themselves
thinking in a manner appropriate to their new gender. The third person
would still be attracted to the same gender they'd always been attracted
to and remain pretty much themselves.
After all, why should _everybody_ respond the same way to something like
that, really? Of course, I'm biased because I've alway found stories
where "Ranma gets stuck as a girl" to be a bit creepy. That's just me.
Also I would take issue with "not channeling"= "automatic death". If I
had to approximate it emotionally, I'd say its about the same way.....
oh, say the same way normal series Ranma would feel if Akane dies. He
would do just about _anything_ to get her back, but if she was gone for
good he would eventually get on with his life. That's what people do.
Of course, I freely acknowledge you've just presented what the
characters think. It's quite possible that you as the author have
decided they could survive, but Ranma and Akane think differently. Even
in the books though, I'm convince that most of the deaths result from a
lack of any sort of counseling. After all, women who were stilled or
men who were gentled would be pretty much shunned afterwards. A
competent psychiatrist could probably improve survival rate about 1000%.
A third point being that the Nerimians hardly have normal psychology in
the first place. They seem capable of extreme acts of will on one hand
and total emotional fragility on the other. Who knows how they would
_really_ react to being cut off from the source?
Anyway, I hope by the end of the series, everyone ends up back in their
proper gender (or at least regains the ability to switch back to that
gender). I wouldn't mind having Akane and Ukyou drop their curses
entirely, but I don't see that happening. (And how long _were_ you
planning to leave Ukyou stuck as a man, Mr. Biles? Giving yourself
plenty of fodder for revenge-fics, aren't you?)
I really, really don't want to see Ranma-chan "getting together" with a
guy, regardless of the "guy's" original gender. However, as I said,
that's just me. You're listening to the guy who couldn't even get
through "Thy Outward Part". (I tried, Mr. Lawson. I'm sure it was
very good, just not my cup of tea.)
Anyway, always nice to see a Ranma/WoT crossover. I must say it's very
different from what I've seen of Louis's "Differing Powers" crossover,
and I don't think there will be any problems with repetition.
Waiting on part 5........