ukyoukwnji@aol.com

Hi again, all!

This may seem like a strange idea, but it came into my head last 
night, and I gotta get it out.  Besides, it may have been something 
Ranma-chan has had to deal with.

For the purposes of this story, this is during the Phoenix Pill 
continuity.  Also, I will tend to refer to Ranma-chan in the masculine 
pronoun, since he considers himself all male at all times, which is 
what makes this particular situation so hard for him to accept...

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RED BEANS AND RICE
a Ranma 1/2 fanfiction by Ukyou Kuonji
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Kasumi set beefbowls down in front of her father and Mr. Saotome. 
Ranma licked his lips.  His favorite meal, too!  He was looking 
forward to it, as it had been a rough day.  He'd been stuck in this 
body for nearly a month, and that meant he was still fighting off 
the guys trying to hit on him -- the perverts!  Didn't they know 
who he was?  Well, *apart* from Kuno, that is.  He was starting to 
sympathize wit Akane for what she'd had to go through before he 
arrived... in fact, he had begun to wonder why she wasn't a bit 
more grateful to him for having put a halt to it.

And this pain in his gut wouldn't go away, either.  Kasumi had given 
him a couple of painkillers when he'd complained about it after 
school today (even let him keep the bottle, in fact), and they'd 
helped some, but the knots were once again starting to form in his 
stomach (or was it a little lower than that?).  He hoped it was 
just hunger pangs, and once again, he smiled in anticipation of 
Kasumi's peerless cooking.  He watched hungrily as she set down 
bowls for Akane and Nabiki... couldn't she hurry this up?  Even if 
he was stuck in this girl's body, he was a growing boy, with an 
appetite to match.  Why was she serving him last?

Finally, she came out from the kitchen with another bowl and a black 
lacquer box, somewhat larger than a bento box.  She set the bowl 
in front of her place, and the box in front of Ranma-chan.  Ranma 
looked very perplexed, and a bit disappointed -- it didn't look like 
a beefbowl.  Kasumi explained, "This is a special day for you, 
Ranma-chan, and as such, I've prepared a special meal for you."

Special... for him?  Well, hey... if it's Kasumi's, it's bound to be 
good in any case.  He lifted the lid off the box.  The entire box was 
covered with an even layer of rice, and in the center, there was a large 
circle of red beans.  It looked very much like the Japanese flag.

Ranma-chan picked at the contents of the box carefully, so as not to 
disturb the design Kasumi had made.  "Uh, Kasumi... it's really very 
pretty, but... where's the meat?"

Kasumi sat down, smiling.  "Oh, there's no meat in this dish."

"Any particular reason?"  An note of irritation began to creep into 
Ranma-chan's voice.

"Well," Kasumi began, either ignoring or not noticing Ranma-chan's 
annoyance, "it's just the traditional meal to serve a young girl on 
this occasion.  You and I need to have a woman-to-woman chat about 
this..."

At this, the two younger Tendo girls paused and looked intently at 
Ranma-chan's meal.  Then they looked at each other, and a silent 
thought passed between them.  Kasumi was about to give Ranma-chan 
"The Talk," and she appeared to have no idea the size of the bomb 
she was about to set off.  Now would be a good time to make themselves 
scarce.

"Uh, Kasumi-oneechan..."

"Yes, Akane?"

"If it's all the same to you, Nabiki and I have some studying to do. 
On her computer.  Right, Nabiki?"

"Huh?  Yeah, yeah, sure."

"Right.  So do you mind if we eat upstairs?"

"Couldn't this wait, Akane?  This is a very important day for 
Ranma-chan, you know, and maybe she'd like your support during 
this time.  After all, she's your--"

Akane cut her off.  "Yeah, I know, but I've *really* got to study 
right away.  There's... there's this big test coming up tomorrow, 
and I need to do real well on it."

Kasumi sighed.  "All right, then.  You study hard."

"Thanks, oneechan!  C'mon, Nabiki."  And they left the table, bowls 
in hand.

"Don't spill in your sister's room!"  Kasumi called after them.

As he watched the two of them leave, Soun Tendo also got the hint. 
"Erm... I think Saotome-kun and I will retire to the patio for a game 
of shogi... won't we, Saotome-kun?"  He stood up and strode off.

The panda held up a sign [Hang on a moment, Tendo-kun.  I'm not 
finished yet]  He picked up his bowl and simply poured the remaining 
contents down his gullet.  [Okay, let's go]

"But father... you haven't finished *your* meal yet, either!"

[I'LL take care of that, my dear]  And the panda picked up Soun's bowl 
and repeated the process.

>From the patio, Mr. Tendo could hear what his friend was doing to 
what was left of his meal, and was none too happy about it.  Not just 
because he was losing what was his, but because that gluttonous panda 
wasn't getting away from the conversation Kasumi was about to have 
with Ranma-chan.  He wanted no part in that, and didn't relish 
rescuing his friend from what might happen.  He poked his head 
into the dining area and hissed angrily at his friend: "Saotome!"

The panda got up and lumbered off to the patio, waving another sign. 
[Hey, YOU had left the table...]

"That's not the point..." Mr. Tendo's voice drifted off as the older 
men headed for their evening game.  Ranma-chan, after staring off in 
the direction they had gone, now turned to Kasumi.

"Okay, I give up.  What was all that about, anyway?  And what's with 
this food, hm?  You say it's some kind of tradition...?"

"That's right.  WHen I was nine years old, just before Mama took sick, 
she fixed this meal for me, and spent the evening explaining..." her 
voice trailed off as she searched for the words, "the facts of life 
to me."

"You were nine years old?  Wow, that's early.  I didn't learn much 
about it until I started going to high school regularly up here."

"Some junior high schools teach that sort of thing, too..."

"Yeah, I guess.  Mine didn't.  But then, it was an all-boys school. 
Maybe they didn't figure it was that important if we weren't gonna 
mix with girls that regularly.  But you said you were *nine*?  That's 
even before junior high.  Why so soon?"

"Well..." Kasumi fidgeted a bit.  She hadn't meant to put herself on 
the spot like this.  Still it was a question that deserved an answer. 
"When I was nine, I started getting... sore... here..." she touched 
her chest.  "And then, one day, I started to... bleed...

"I thought something was wrong with me.  I went running to the school 
nurse in hysterics.  I really thought I was dying or something.  She 
just gave me one of these," and she held up another one of those 
painkillers she had given him earlier that day, "and sent me home 
with a note for my mother.  Mama read the note, and that night, she 
fixed me this dish, explaining about the differences between men," 
and she poked at the rice, "and women," and at the red beans, "and 
the changes we undergo in becoming one or the other.  She explained 
that menarche -- that was what she called what I was going through 
-- was just another step in becoming a woman, and that it was something 
to celebrate... and explain a bit."

"Explain what?"

Kasumi took a deep breath.  "How much do you know about being a woman, 
Ranma-chan?"

Ranma-chan smirked.  "More than most men, that's for sure."

Kasumi sighed.  This was going to be harder than she had thought it 
would be.  "No, I mean do you realize what you're going through?  
You know, the cramps, the bleeding..."

"Bleeding?  What're you talking about, Kasumi?"

Kasumi's expression went stern, a no-nonsense, don't-play-dumb look,
and Ranma-chan flinched at the sight.  "Ranma... while you were taking 
your cold-water bath, I washed your clothes.  Your boxer shorts were 
bloody.  You're going to need a napkin for the next day or so."

"A napkin?"

Another sigh.  <I have to spell it out for him, don't I>  "A sanitary 
pad, Ranma.  You're having your first period."

"I'm WHAT?!"

"It's a natural thing, Ranma.  It happens to every girl; it just hadn't 
happened to you since you'd never stayed a girl long enough.  Every 
month or so, we have an egg travel down from the ovary to the uterus, 
and there it sits, waiting to be fertilized.  After a month, the body 
gives up on it, eliminates the old egg, and starts the cycle over.  
You see, this just means that you have become a full-fledged, fertile 
female."

Ranma-chan's eyes widened in horror, and a howl of anguish escaped 
from her lips.  With tears streaming from her face, she got up and 
bolted from the house.

"I'd say he took that pretty well."  A sardonic tone of voice 
preceded Nabiki's re-entrance into the dining room.  "Anyway, sis, 
congratulations... for once in your life, I imagine you've said 
*too much*."

"Oh!  Nabiki!  Are you two done studying, then?"

Nabiki facefaulted.

***

Well...

It's not quite finished, actually... I'm still working on a coda to 
this, where Ranma-chan confronts Cologne again, but I wanted to send 
this out for now, and see what you all thought of it.

Oh, and as for the traditional beans and rice, I am led to understand 
that this is common; although now that I think about it, I suspect that 
they'd be arranged on a round plat in the yin-yang pattern (red signifies 
female-yin, and white male-yang.  I leave it to the hentai or clinically-
minded among us to ascertain why those colors are used -- I have my own 
suspicions)

Let me know what you think, as it may affect the coda by the time I 
intend to send it to the r.a.a.c.  Heck, it may affect the whole thing, 
if I can knock this out in a matter of hours, surely I can revise it 
that fast, too.

Write me at: ukyoukwnji@aol.com

Until then, ja!

Itsu mo,
Ucchan   ^_^