A Glimpse of the Flame
Author's note: Dark cold nights have ways of bringing people together.
Souls search for warmth in the companionship of others. Flames spark and
fires die down. Until all is left is the light that shines on as a
reminder of the heat that once was there. A glimpse of the flame that
once was there.
The lobby was bathed in soft warm light and the night had just
begun to deepen. Mr. Kobayashi was sitting by the bar when the door
opened for a patron. Her light fragrance danced across the room like the
soft melodies played on the piano. He did not bother to turn - he knew
that his waiting was over.
"Excuse me," she interrupted a clerk, "I was supposed to meet
someone here tonight, but I'm afraid that I'm very late. Have you seen a
tall man in a black jacket leaving the restaurant?" The clerk was too
busy to notice anyone leaving the place, so busy that he did not even
notice her asking her question.
"I'm sorry, ma'am, but we have had a lot of customers with that
description leaving the restaurant."
The voice came from behind her where a tall man in a black jacket
stood. Under the black jacket, he wore a turtle-necked shirt. It was
colored dark blue from the top and faded to white as it came down to his
green slacks. His clothes looked simple that way, just as simple as
those the lady before her wore that night. She had a red blazer over a
white blouse, a brown skirt, a pair of hazel brown sandals and a gray
trenchcoat she then had in one arm.
"It must be cold outside. May I help you with that?" he said as he
pointed to the gray coat. "You will be staying," he said with a smile,
stating more than asking.
"I'm sorry, but my old friend, I missed him." She hesitated to
hand over the coat.
"Then allow me make you a new one. I am Hajime Kobayashi from
Nerima..." he bowed gracefully and kissed her hand lightly, "...your old
friend." Her eyes lit up and her checks blushed. Surprised and happy,
she stood there silent.
"Excuse me, but I believe the proper response is 'Pleased to meet
you, Mr. Kobayashi, I am Jennifer Reyes, anata wa eigo no sensei.'"
"I'm sorry, I was just shocked. I mean, you look so different from
the last time we met."
"A lot of things have changed through the years but, I assure you,
I'm still me. Come, let's go. I have arranged for a nice and quiet
place for dining. The ordinary tables here are too crowded, especially
tonight."
He took the coat from her and gave it to the clerk at the booth,
who methodically took care of it. He offered a hand to the lady and she
placed her arm around his. He then proceeded to escort her to the main
hall.
A man in a blue kimono bowed and opened the door to the main hall
for them. They bowed slightly, then entered.
The main hall had many tables and even more customers. One would
not think, from looking outside, that the restaurant could have so many
patrons. "This way," he pointed to a hallway to their right. They
walked just a little further from the entrance when he stopped and tapped
the paper wall of the hallway.
A panel slide to the side, revealing another room by a Japanese
garden. A woman in a traditional kimono welcomed them as they entered.
The room was situated in the middle of a pond. It had no walls, other
than the one they came through - this gave them a good view of the place.
There were a lot of blue candles floating on the water that night and it
helped illuminate the place. Across the water stood an island with a big
cherry tree that was in full bloom.
They sat by the table in front of each other, then the woman by the
door bowed and exited, closing the wall panel as she went.
"I also took the liberty of ordering for us - I hope you won't
mind. Anyway, it saves us time so we can talk a little longer. That is,
if you can get over the shock."
"I'm sorry, yes, so, how are you? You look so different, your
hair, your clothes and you don't have your glasses anymore. How long has
it been? Seven, eight years?"
"Seven, I think - I can't remember anymore, it's been so long.
Perhaps even too long." There was a hint of sadness in his voice.
"What do you mean?" she asked with concern, "what happened?"
"I don't know, really, I was hoping you could help me find the
answer." A gentle tapping on the panel was then heard. "The tea, it's
here."
"Please come in," she said.
The door opened and the lady that who was there a while ago came in
with a tray. She set the tray with the teapot and cups by the table and
exited the room again. Hajime took a cup and poured some tea for her.
"Be careful - it's hot," he warned her, then he poured his own cup of
tea.
"It has been ten years since I made a promise to come back for her
and I have kept my promise."
"So, how is she?"
"She's fine, I guess."
"And you?"
"Like I said, I don't know."
"I still don't understand."
"Ten years ago when I left Nerima, I made a promise to come back
and prove myself to her, ten years from then. I saw her a couple of
weeks back. She was her same old self. Of course, her looks have
changed - even time have ways of changing appearances... just look at me,
right. But she never really changed: she was still single, moving up in
her career, she has everything she ever wanted and has no interest in
getting into a relationship soon."
"That is why you're their to convince her that she needs someone
like you."
"Yes, but that is part of the problem. You see, all that time I
spent waiting, I always thought that when I saw her again, I would still
feel the same way I did years ago. Unfortunately, I was wrong. I saw
her and I saw myself back then and I asked myself why was I doing this.
The magic is gone, back then, it might have been different."
"So, what now?"
"I guess there is no use trying to blame yourself for what you did
in the past. We all have to move on, somehow. Tell me, Jennifer - why
did I make that promise?"
"I always thought you loved her, but maybe I was wrong. You were
always so strange then."
"I still am. Perhaps that is why I did it. I did like her, then,
and I knew, somehow, how things would end. It was so tragic that it was
too tempting to resist. Now it's done, I can't help but wonder if I was
right."
"What do you mean?"
"For ten years, I have avoided getting into relationships.
Everytime someone came along, I would ask myself if I really did like her
or if I just wanted to get out of my promise."
"You could have at least tried. In the end, you could have known
the answer."
"Yes, and in the end, someone could have gotten hurt. It would not
be fair for anyone: me or the other party. We would just both be hurt.
I guess maybe it's better this way."
"And in the meantime, you suffer."
"So tragic, isn't it."
A tap on the wall was again heard, and their conversation was
interrupted by the lady. She brought them a big earthen bowl and eating
utensils. She placed them near the table and left. Hajime opened the
earthen bowl, placed some of the food in smaller bowl, then handed it to
Jennifer.
"All that time, you never even tried."
"To tell someone that I loved her? That what I feel for her is
true and that was all that mattered to me? No."
"Why not?"
"Alright, Jennifer Reyes - I had feelings for you. It is true and
that is all that mattered. I loved you and I knew that it wouldn't work.
It is better this way."
She was taken by surprise and all she could do then was to avoid
his eyes. She shifted her view to the food and took a spoonful.
"Mmph..." She was shocked by something in her mouth.
"Are you alright? Was the soup too hot?"
She swallowed then answered him, "No, the soup is just fine but the
muscle seems to be cold."
"Yes, they have strange ways of preparing their food here. Even
the name of the restaurant is strange: The Blue Cherry."
"They do have a very nice view out here. Look at all those candles
floating on the water. It's surprisingly warm out here - is it because
of those?"
"This place, it was built near a natural hot spring. The water
around us comes from there. And those candles they are using to
commemorate the death of a sage."
"Who was it?"
"He was a man who was known by many names. He was called father,
brother, son and friend. But his name is not important."
"Why is he so special?"
"Long ago ruled a powerful emperor. He ordered that a fallen
warrior should be buried under each cherry tree, because he did not like
the color of its blossoms. Then lived a sage who questioned everything.
He asked many things, like the value of our reality and the nature of
death. He questioned the virtues man held important and wondered why we
fail at them. Because of all his asking, he knew many things and helped
many people with their own questions.
"Many people grew to love him but he never found anyone to share
his life with. His questions were too important and the answers were
sometimes too elusive. But one day, he stopped asking. He was dead and
before that he did not ask why. On that day, the emperor ordered that
his body should be buried here right under that cherry tree.
"To this day, some people believe that he is still with us, walking
with the living as one of them. He is still searching for his answers.
This is the 42nd day from the day his body was laid to rest centuries
ago. They say the blossoms of this tree are tainted blue and not red
because that was the color of his blood."
"That is an amazing story. Is that where the restaurant got its
name?"
"Yes, I guess so. Jennifer, you're married," he said, about to ask
something until he was interrupted.
"You never seem to run out of surprises. How did you know?"
"Your ring, when I kissed your hand, it was cold on my fingers.
Anyway, what I wanted to say was: do you believe there are people made
for each other?"
"I think I would have to say yes. We love each other and I'm glad
I married him. I just wish someday you could find your one true love."
"That is too romantic, I don't think I would ever get there. But,
if I do, you will be the first to know." The wind begun to blow softly
and the cherry blossoms started falling. Heart-shaped petals danced in
the breeze. Hajime looked at the tree and pointed. "Look," he said,
"the blossoms... they really are blue."
She turned to wonder at the event and to see the flames of the
candles on the water dying. "The flames, the candles, they are..." she
stopped then realize that Hajime was gone.
She went to the sliding panel stepped out of the room and looked
across the corridor but did not find her friend. She walked towards the
entrance of the main hall to ask the man by the door. "Excuse me, did
you see the man I was with a while ago?"
"I'm sorry, ma'am, but I never saw you with anyone tonight."
"Are you sure? We passed by here and went through that corridor,"
she pointed to the right of the room but they did see any corridor.
"It's gone, but it was here a while ago."
She did not bother to explain; even she was too confused at the
time. That night, as she was heading home, she realize that it was the
last time she would ever see Hajime Kobayashi.
Nikholas F. Toledo Zu @ http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Flats/3145/mezza9.html
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