At 07:51 AM 2/20/98 -0000, Sean Gaffney wrote:

Bert Van Vliet wrote:

Now then, I understand that they haven't gotten much in the way of C&C so
far, and, quite frankly, I find that unacceptable. 

Some of us have only just had time to read it, y'know!

You know how Bert gets sometimes ;)

Frankly, it's fabulous.  Sylia in particular is written beautifully, and
the others each have their little moments.  Jeanne is right in that these
will BECOME the KS we know and love.

Bits I liked:  the colous scheme scene.  Nene hacking away to jam the
communications.  The ending.

Thanks. Glad it worked for you. It was hard trying to keep the KS just
slightly off from what we know from BGC. As I said in my notes, these are
the people who will become the people we know.

The color scheme scene was especially fun to write - and it's all based on
what could have happened in real life too!

Bits I thought didn't work as well:  the flashbacks from Linna and Priss
during the fight.  Dunno, it just threw off the rhythm for me.  If they
did a rememberance-type dealy, as opposed to us actually LEAVING the 
scene for a page or two, I might accept it more.

A remembrance type dealie? Such as an actual reminescence?

But that's a minor nit.  I really enjoyed this one, and deeply apologise
to the authors and Bert for not reading it two seconds after it arrived 
in my box.

Well, you're forgiven, by me anyway.  Don't know about Andy, though. You
know how he gets about things sometimes.........


<ducking>ly yours,



Jeanne Hedge


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