Nihao!

	You don't want to know where I got this idea from, believe me, you really don't
want to know.

Jusenkyo Guide

Jusenkyo Productions Proudly Presents
A Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction
Nerima Vs. Satan!

(Ranma 1/2 is owned by the divine Takahashi Rumiko, her lawyers, which are the spawn
of Satan, can wipe the floor with me in a court battle. Not that it would help, I
have no money so please don't.)

	The Lord of Lies sat brooding on his throne in the darkest pits of Hell. After a
busy millenium of damming most of the world, Satan had a problem; he was bored. The
actions of his lesser demons no longer amused him and even the succubae were dull
now.

	"What to do, what to do," he mussed. Then it came to him. It had been centuries
 since the last time he had personally trick humans into giving him their souls.


	"Mahler!" The Black Lord roared.

	"Yeah?" the demoness replied from at his elbow.

	"I told you not to do that!" Satan said, "Anyway, I wish to go to the mortal realm,
tell me of a good place to have some fun, and souls."

	"Well you could always go to Nekomi, " Mahler said.

Satan looked at her pointedly, "I told you I will not interfere with that feud you
have going on with Belldandy."

	Mahler shrugged, "It was worth a shot. I heard that Nerima is fun."

	Satan smiled, it wasn't very nice, "Ah yes, the place with all those cursed fools.
Very well, I shall go!" 

	And with a fire and brimstone explosion, the Lord of Flies departed for Nerima.


Back in Hell Mahler franticly waved her hand in front of her nose. "I hate it when
he does that, it always smells like lighted farts," she said.

Ryoga:

	The Eternal Lost  Boy was lost, but what else was new. Deep within the forests of
Japan he struggled on, determined to make it back to the Tendo Dojo to beat up Ranma,
win the love of Akane, and sleep with her as her pet P-Chan once more, but not necessarily
in that order. 

	And large, and smelly, explosion shook him out of his day dream. In front of him
was a large creature with skin the color of blood. Bat like wings were folded on
his back, and his legs ended in goats hooves.

	"I am Satan!" he said, "I have come to grant you whatever you desire in exchange
for you immortal soul."

	Ryoga blinked a few times. Sometimes in his wandering he had started to hear voices
and see things, but this was a new one to him.

	"I have got to stop watching those foreign horror films," he said, and started to
walk off.

	"Wait, I really am Satan!" Satan said, "I'm here to grant you your fondest desire."
 

	Ryoga considered it, "OK, make Akane fall in love with me," he said.

Satan looked a bit embarrassed, "Um I can't."

	"What do you mean you can't?" Ryoga asked.

	"I can't affect true loves, Kami-sama said the next time I tried he'd give me to
Azusa," Satan said.

	Ryoga shuttered in sympathy. 

	Satan smacked his fist into his palm, "I know! I can give you a succubus that will
look like Akane." He snapped his fingers and a demoness appeared that looked exactly
like Tendo Akane.

	"See, she's even better than the real one as she doesn't think!" Satan said. He
gestured and the demon started to remove her clothes to display her ample, uh, attributes.
Satan heard a thud behind him and turned around. Ryoga was lying there, passed out
with a bloody nose.

	"Ah hell," Satan said.

Mousse:

	"So if I give you my soul I'll get Shampoo right?" Mousse said.

	"Yes," said Satan, "And I'm over here."

	"Where?" Mousse asked, turning away from the houseplant to talk with the good luck
cat.

	"No boy, over here," Satan said.

	"Oh, sorry," Mousse said, "You know, you look like that Old Ghoul."

	Cologne hit him on the head with her stick, "Who's an old ghoul?" she demanded.
"And as for you Lord of Lies, you still haven't filled your promise to me."

	"And what was that?" Satan asked.

	"To get rid of Happosai," she said.

	"He just keeps coming back," Satan said.

Kasumi:

	"I am Satan!" Satan announced, appearing in Kasumi's kitchen.

	"Oh my!" Kasumi exclaimed, "Father, there's a demon in my kitchen."

	"Your father will not be able to help you," Satan said, evilly.

	"Oh no?" a voice said behind him.

	Satan spun around, then turned back, "Why didn't you tell me He's your Father?"


	Kasumi shrugged, "I thought you knew."

Ranma:

	"So you'll get rid of my curse right?" Ranma asked Satan.

	"Right," Satan said, at last he would have a soul.

	"Then go for it."

	Satan snapped his fingers. "It is done," he said.

	Ranma picked up a bucket of water and poured it over his head.

	"You lied to me!" Ranma -Chan yelled.

	"But, but, it should have worked!" Satan protested.

	"Hiyu-shoten-ha!" Ranma shouted and blasted Satan out of the dojo and across town.


	In Heaven the goddess of manga laughed.

Akane:

	"I am Satan!" a somewhat battered Satan said.

	"You pervert!" Akane yelled.

	Satan learned that it isn't a good idea to disturb Akane when she's taking a bath.


Nabiki:

	"Ok, so I sell you my soul for the chance to help you right?" Satan asked Nabiki.


	"Correct Satan baby, just sign on the dotted line," the middle Tendo daughter said.


	A blackened to the point of being crispy, Satan appeared back in Hell.

	"What happened to you?" Mahler asked.

	Satan explained about his day from, well, hell.

	"That still doesn't explain how come you're so cooked," Mahler said.

	"After I left Nerima, I went over to Tomobiki to try and get at least one soul.
I tried to get that Moroboshi kid to sell his for a succubus," he said.

	Mahler frowned, "I thought that would have worked," she said.

	"Oh it did, he was right on the verge of signing when that wife of his showed up.
First she fried him, then me."

	"Damn," Mahler said, "Remind me to stay away from Lum."

End.


---
Here sir we come to famous training ground of accursed springs
--------------------------------------------------------------
|Guide of the training grounds|Ranma 1/2, Tenchi Muyo, BGC,  |
|of accursed springs, 8th     |AMG, Tank Police, Gall Force, |
|Disciple of Eriond, and proud|YUA, GitS, ADP, Evangelion    |
| member of the #SkAS#        |Project A-ko, UY, VPM, BGC!   |
|--------http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/6549 ----------------|
|Akane, Linna, Washu, Nene,   |Nene showed Mackie just how   |
|Skuld, Belldandy, Kiyone     |much she knew. Winter Blossoms|
---------------------------Jusenkyo---------------------------



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