This is something a little different from the other fusions you've 
no doubt seen. I've tried to catch the spirit of both worlds without 
making it too much like one or the other. Despite the names shared by 
these characters with their originals, the characters may not necessarily 
act the way their namesakes would. Keep it in mind. I've tried to make it 
a bit more mature, but still keeping a bit of absurdity to keep things 
interesting. Also keep in mind that there are quite a number of cameos 
from various sources. Spot them all and win a prize! (Not cash, sorry...) 
Please send C&C and any suggestions on the story to scriviner@yahoo.com

	Standard fanfic disclaimer averring that all characters, 
situations,  places and events with even a vague resemblance to the work 
of Rumiko Takahashi, Fujishima Kosuke's, whoever did Koko wa Greenwood or 
any one of a number of works, probably was borrowed in the first place. 
Apologies to all. Rights are to whoever owns them. Don't bother to sue, 
though. I'm broke.

I hereby present, for the reader's perusal:
        Sore wa Nibunoichi Megami-sama.
        (That's 1/2 My Goddess.)
        A Ranma 1/2 - Oh! My Goddess semi-crossover fanfic by Scriviner

That's 1/2 My Goddess Part IX

Of Serious Plays and Whimsical Theatre...

	Tonight was the last night. The Martial Arts Varsity had been 
working overtime this past month because tomorrow... tomorrow would be 
opening night for their production of the 'Golden Comb', a traditional 
Japanese fairy tale. There hadn't been a particular reason why they'd 
decided on doing this play, beyond the fact that it had two female leads 
and one male lead. Perfect for Ranma and the Tendo cousins, Akane and 
Ranko.
	Admittedly, there were other plays considered for the fair, 
including Gosunkugi's insistence on 'The King in Yellow'. Fortunately 
cooler heads prevailed. Likewise, there was a small faction within the 
Varsity team, mostly comprised of a few newbies, who had wanted to do 
'Castle of Cagliostro' for the simple reason that several of them had 
already acted in it back in high school. Also considered was the musical 
Sunset Boulevard, adapted into Japanese. With Ranma as Joe Gillis, Ranko 
as Norma Desmond and Akane as Betty Schafer. Unfortunately, Ranko had 
totally refused to be made up as an aging silent film actress past her 
prime and no one was able to come up with a decent translation of the 
songs anyway, thus that idea was scrapped.
	Ticket sales were already through the roof. They were going to have 
the auditorium packed. In a few cases, members of the respective Saotome 
and both Tendo fanclubs had purchased multiple tickets just to spite 
their rivals.
	Nabiki's offer to do the auditing for a small cut of the fee was 
well received by the senior Varsity members because they wanted to be 
free to concentrate on the play... of course, Nabiki neglected to mention 
she was going to use some of the money to invest in certain... other 
activities. There may be more on that later.
	Natsume's 'one week visit while she's looking for an apartment' had 
extended itself indefinitely. She'd become a part of the household quite 
quickly, becoming fast friends with Akane... Kurumi had been sent home at 
the end of the week. They didn't want their parents to worry... or drop 
in for that matter.
	Ukyou, out of pity, had offered to cater their practices for a 
small fee... Ryouga, of course, immediately accepted.
	But that was the past... tomorrow afternoon would be the 
performance... 
the play was the thing and tonight was the last night... 
	Mousse winced and stood suddenly from the cloth chair which had 
'Director' written across its back. He'd insisted on bringing it. He was 
dressed in his regular white overcoat, but he wore a red beret slightly 
askew. He pulled a mega-phone out of his coat and shouted into it, "Cut! 
Cut! CUT!!! Saotome, tonight is our final run through and you still 
haven't memorized your lines?!
	Ranma frowned at Mousse, doing his best to control his nervousness 
and irritation. It wasn't really his fault it had to be admitted... for 
some obscure reason, the story had originally been given to Shampoo to 
turn into a play. She had managed to create a wonderful stage play out of 
the traditional fairy tale. Complete with stirring dialogue and elegant 
metered prose. Unfortunately, she'd written the original script in 
Chinese, before translating it into Japanese. Despite Mousse's tutoring 
in the matter, her Japanese still stank abominably. It was eventually 
corrected by Mousse, but up until this late date, errors still kept 
popping up.
	Ranko, the current source of Ranma's unease, had her arms draped 
languidly around him, "Can't I at least finish the kissing scene?"
	To one side, Ryouga crossed his arms and glared at Ranma. He was 
annoyed at the delay in general and Ranma in particular. This was not 
new.
	What was new, was that Natsume had her arm linked with Ryouga's and 
was looking as if she were enjoying herself just a little bit too much... 
She had volunteered to play Ryouga's wife and was giving a very 
convincing, if occasionally entirely too enthusiastic performance, much 
to Ukyou's simmering annoyance and Ryouga's utter obliviousness.
	From offstage, Akane shouted, "It's a cut, Ranko! When it's a cut 
you stop the scene! Haven't you learned that yet?!"
	Ranko turned to Akane, a grin on her features as she winked, 
"What're you getting so jealous about? I mean you've got two kissing 
scenes with him, I only get one."
	That was another problem. They hadn't managed to practice any of 
the kissing scenes at all, because something, somehow, would inevitably 
interfere. Falling sandbags, flying okonomiyaki, thrown hammers, rabid 
fans, even an escaped alligator. Not a single kissing scene had been 
practiced yet. Not surprisingly Mousse was exceedingly annoyed.
	Mousse threw his megaphone onto the ground and jumped up and down 
on it a few times until he felt better, "That does it! Everyone take 
five! We'll try it again afterwards!!"
	Shampoo, holding a clipboard, followed Mousse, giving an apologetic 
backward glance towards the rest of the crew.
	Ranko leaned close to Ranma, whispering playfully into his ear, 
"You know... we could always slip away and practice the scene on our own 
behind the auditorium..."
	Ranma pulled away from Ranko, a worried grin pasted onto his face, 
"Erhm... thanks, but no, Ranko." It was taking all of his willpower to 
keep from transforming into a girl... Admittedly, the transformation was 
now triggered by an act of will, but Ranma had discovered the he still 
tended to transform into a woman while in close proximity to Ranko... 
Nabiki claimed it was just an ingrained reflex, but no one was exactly 
certain.
	Akane stalked towards them, "You can let him go now, Ranko."
	Ranko did, smiling cattily at Akane, and favoring Ranma with a 
saucy wink...
	Akane turned to Ranma a frown still marring her features, "And 
you... try not to look so much as if you're enjoying yourself!"
	"But I wasn't..!"
	"Yes you were!" Ranko called back as she walked away.
	Akane's frown deepened, looking intently at him, "So what are you 
smiling for then?!"
	"But he was supposed to look like he's enjoying himself." Ryouga 
muttered darkly as he walked offstage... "He's kissing her, for goodness 
sake, he's supposed to enjoy himself right?"
	"If you say so, Hibiki-sempai." Natsume cooed adoringly from his 
arm.
	"Right," Ryouga muttered, not realizing who'd answered him.
	"I wouldn't really know... I've never been kissed..." Natsume 
murmured meaningfully to him.
	He finally realized who was saying this, "Erhm... shouldn't you let 
go of me now?"
	"Should I?" she asked innocently.

	Mousse moved quickly towards the prop managers, still on a low 
grade simmer... the newbies in charge gave a fearful glance towards him 
then quickly consulted among themselves...
	"Everything set, I hope?" Mousse asked, heavy emphasis on the last 
two words...
	"Er... everything but one," the pink-haired freshman of uncertain 
gender replied, "We... er... we couldn't find a golden comb..."
	"WHAT?!" Mousse blew up, "How can we call this play 'The Golden 
Comb' if we don't have a golden comb?!"
	Shampoo put a hand on Mousse's shoulder, "Mousse-sempai stay 
calm... no be good to anyone if no calm!"
	"Er..." the newbie tried to say, "We... er... we did find... um..." 
another member was shoved to the fore, "You show him!"
	"We got this." Said another freshman... a somewhat unremarkable 
though handsome redheaded man, holding a long piece of shaped black 
plastic in his hand...
	Mousse blinked at it through his glasses. He paused for a moment to 
wipe his glasses clean on his sleeve, hoping against hope that it wasn't 
what he thought it was.
	He put his glasses on. Blinked again then finally said, "Is... 
that..." 
	Shampoo peered at it and blurted, "Ai-yah! You want to call play, 
'Black Hairbrush'?"
	"This is unacceptable!" Mousse roared.
	"No! No, it's okay!" the pink-haired freshie soothed, "We found 
some gold paint... and well..."
	The other freshman held up a can of gold spray paint, and spritzed 
the hairbrush... it turned a rather unconvincing shade of dark metallic 
yellow... just like black plastic that had been sprayed with gold 
paint...
	"What did I do to deserve this..?" Mousse muttered.
	
	Ranma yawned hugely as he stepped out of the rest room 
straightening the kimono that was his costume... this entire thing was 
going into overtime again. It was already past ten and Mousse was 
apparently not going to let anyone sleep until they had at least one 
perfect run through. No one had any idea how long it would take to get 
one of those. It was bad enough he had two roles in this production...
	"Oh, Ranma..." a silken voice cut through his thoughts...
	Ranma turned around to find that Ranko was leaning against the wall 
next to the restroom door.
	"What do you want Ranko?" Ranma asked, carefully.
	"You." Ranko said, smiling at him as she approached quietly...
	Ranma backed away nervously, "Ranko, I... you know I'm not... 
erhm..."
	"No need to deny it Ranma... you can feel it too..." Ranko 
continued, "This continuing denial of your feelings isn't healthy..."
	"No... no... no..." Ranma stuttered.
	"I know why you keep turning into a woman whenever I'm nearby 
Ranma... and it's not this 'conditioned reflex' thing Nabiki says..."
	"Er... that's all very nice Ranko, but..."
	"You know it's because I turn you on..."
	"Wha--?!" Ranma choked, stopping in surprise, "Where'd you get that 
idea-"
	"No use denying it," Ranko said smiling hungrily at him, "I can 
feel your pulse rate rise when you look at me... I can feel the increase 
in your body temperature... I know you want me..."
	"That's not..."
	Ranko wrapped her arms around his neck and murmured softly, "Liar."
	"Ran-ko! Stop that..." Ranma cried trying to pull away... despite 
himself, she was starting to affect him... Ranko was a devastatingly 
gorgeous woman after all... and he was a man... a very tempted man...
	Her eyes twinkled merrily, locked with his, "Yesss... you are 
enjoying it aren't you?"
	"No..." Ranma denied vaguely and without much conviction, "It's..."
	Ranko lifted her face up to meet his, "You know you want me..."
	It was only Ryouga's timely arrival that totally spoiled the entire 
scene, "Finally found the bathroom..." he muttered.
	Ryouga had to take a second look before the scene occurring just 
next to the bathroom door registered. He gave a tiny squeak before he 
collapsed from a nosebleed. Some things his system just couldn't deal 
with... two Rankos, one with long hair and markings on her forehead 
another with shorter hair, locked in a passionate embrace was one of 
them.
	Ranko took a moment to glance at Ryouga, then glanced back at Ranma 
who she realized belatedly was now her height and another gender 
entirely... she found her own face smiling sheepishly at her, "You can 
let go of me now, Ranko..." Ranma said in her voice.
	She gave Ranma another catty smile, "You know... I really must tell 
you that changing into me isn't going to stop me from doing this... I 
mean I know that body pretty well, if I do say so myself..." she rubbed 
up against him a bit more pushing their chests together and giving Ranma 
some rather interesting new and surprisingly pleasurable sensations to 
process... 
	Ranma's eyes widened in panic, "You wouldn't... not with another 
girl..!"
	"Try me," Ranko replied with a grin, running a moist wet tongue 
across her lips, "I know it's still you in there... just because you're 
me now doesn't stop me from feeling what I do about you..."
	"But I don't feel the same about you!"
	"That's why I intend to teach you, right?" Ranko murmured, gently 
pulling Ranma towards her...
	"But Akane..!"
	"One chance, Ranma... just give me one chance and I can guarantee 
you'll forget her..."
	"Ranko-sempai! There you is! Mousse-sempai ready for next run-
through... Ai-yah!" Shampoo stopped short when she noticed the two. Her 
eyes widened and she blushed, hiding quickly behind her clipboard, "So 
sorry to interrupt..! If want kiss-kiss go ahead, no mind Shampoo!"
	Ranko rolled her eyes and sighed, "Always these interruptions..."
	"Erhm... we'll be right there, Shampoo." Ranma answered.
	"Who you?" Shampoo said peeking out from behind her clipboard with 
a curious expression on her face, "And where Ranma-sempai?
	Ranma started to reply, "I'm... um..."
	"Shampoo, I'd like you to meet my twin..." Ranko said shifting 
slightly. She still had an arm around Ranma's waist, and gestured at the 
transformed Saotome with her other hand resting playfully on Ranma's 
shoulder. She grinned. It wasn't a lie at all... Ranma was currently 
Ranko's twin.
	"I'm... uh..." Ranma glanced down at the unconscious Ryouga and 
quickly grasped at the first name which popped to mind, "Ryou-er... 
Ryouko... yeah that's it. I'm Ranko's twin, Ryouko... heh... heh..." she 
laughed nervously.
	Shampoo looked relieved and she smiled at the two of them, "Oh, so 
very happy to see you two very... er... very close sisters. Very close... 
um... what happen to Saotome-sempai and why you in his costume?"
	Ranko smiled smoothly and replied, "Ranma had to go to the 
bathroom. He didn't want to wrinkle the costume..." she nodded at her 
twin, one hand sliding slowly down Ranma's back...
	"Oh, Shampoo make you put it on first so it no wrinkle! Shampoo see 
now. I go tell Mousse-nisama you be ready in little while is okay?"
	Ranma smiled nervously, "Yeah... er that's it..."
	Shampoo nodded and smiled as she walked away, "Ai-yah... need find 
Natsume too..."
	Ranma pulled away quickly from Ranko, his body shifting quickly 
back into his male form, filling the uniform out, "Ranko, please stop 
doing this! I'm not interested!"
	Ranko laughed, "That's not what your body keeps telling me..." she 
kissed her fingers lightly and pressed them to his lips, "A little 
reminder... come on, we've got a show to put on..." She grinned as she 
walked away.
	Ranma sighed in relief... he wished she wouldn't keep doing this... 
his nerves were frayed to the breaking point. He'd had to deal with this 
sort of behavior all through out the practice, but for some reason she 
was being especially aggressive tonight... he hoped with all his might 
that it wouldn't continue. Save for that tiny part of him kept hoping it 
would...

	Ryouga collapsed onto the mat backstage, exhausted... it was 
already four in the morning, and he'd wasted precious minutes of rest 
just looking for the damn mat... Mousse had been utterly merciless, 
practicing them over and over all because of Saotome constant slip-ups!
	He curled up quietly hoping to get more than a few hours of 
sleep... he'd be needing it... 
	Natsume smiled from the curtain as she watched Ryouga slip into 
sleep. Ryouga's mat was in a fairly isolated corner, far from everyone 
else. Everybody else had collapsed in various other parts of the 
auditorium, except Ranma and Akane who were still going over their lines 
in Ranma's dressing room... no interference there. She moved very quietly 
towards the mat and lay down next to Ryouga. She felt that she was being 
uncharacteristically bold... sleeping next to him... but it was so hard 
to resist a chance like this!

	Mousse blearily inspected the equipment that would lift Ranko up 
and fly her off the stage for the big finale... it looked to be in good 
shape, even though the equipment was old and they did have to borrow it 
off of the drama club. They had been up the whole night and they had yet 
to complete a faultless run through. It was already nine in the morning, 
everyone having barely managed to catch two or three restless hours of 
sleep. Mousse was really feeling it...
	Once more all of the kissing scenes had been muffed... those were 
to be their major selling point and they hadn't gotten them right once! 
Not once. A stumble here... a slip there... always just short of total 
liplock! It was almost enough to make him take his beret off and jump up 
and down on it... 
	Shampoo ran up to Mousse with a worried look on her face, cutting 
through his musings, "What's the matter, Shampoo-chan?"
	"Mousse-sempai! Sayuri say she no can go on as samurai's wife! Have 
bad-bad headache! Can barely move... Kisaragi-kun take her to infirmary."
	"She what?! She can't do this to me!!! Not now! We need a 
replacement!" Mousse looked frantic. His eyes narrowed behind his glasses 
and he stared at Shampoo, "There's no help for it, Shampoo-chan! You'll 
have to go in her place!"
	"Ai-yah!" shampoo blushed, "Mousse-sempai too-too believing in 
Shampoo. No can do that, Mousse-sempai! Shampoo not same dress size as 
Sayuri-san. Also Shampoo have very bad stage fright! No can do!"
	"But who else can we get?! We picked Sayuri because she was as tall 
as Ran--"
	"Ryouga you total jackass! How could you?!" A voice screamed from 
backstage.
	Another voice called out, "Alright you little... what do you think 
you're doing?!"
	"What's going on back there?" Mousse demanded as he stormed off in 
that general direction.
	Shampoo shrugged and ran after him...
	Ryouga stirred, still half asleep... he couldn't feel his right 
arm... not so good... last time that'd happened, it was because he'd 
gotten into a particularly nasty fight... unfortunately, he didn't recall 
fighting anyone, so that was out. There was another odd sensation... he 
hadn't had this particular one in a while... there seemed to be something 
warm and soft pressed against his side... and on his chest... was... 
that's a hand. No... wait... that's two hands... Soft slender hands... 
the last time he'd felt this... was a few years back... when Ukyou was 
still his fiance...
	He sighed happily... she'd forgiven him... he was sure of it... he 
swung his other arm around so he could hold her properly in his arms... 
he was content. There was the sweet scent of her shampoo... hmmm... since 
when did she start using that brand... and she seemed a bit... taller 
than she used to be...
	Nevertheless he was luxuriating in the warm happy glow of this 
close contact... just as the voice screamed in his ear and totally ruined 
the tender mood...
	"Ryouga you total jackass! How could you?!"
	Ryouga's mind, still only operating at half capacity, (which given 
his full capacity really wasn't all that much to work with) tried to 
process this. That was Ukyou's voice. It was her angry voice. The one she 
used when she was mad at him. Why would she be mad if she was lying next 
to him? The voice didn't come from next to him... this did not compute. 
His brain still not entirely willing to give up the remaining portion 
which was asleep decided to consult with the other senses... in this 
instance... the one most necessary appeared to be vision... hence... 
eyes... open... 
	Hair. Long. Brown. Ponytail... Matched with Ukyou's... wait! That's 
not her face. Conclusion? Not Ukyou.
	He wasn't hugging Ukyou. That snapped the rest of his mind into 
action.
	The actual Ukyou was standing off to one side, in a righteous fury. 
In her hands the gigantic spatula... the sound of the shout had also 
attracted other attention... 
	Ranma and Akane burst out of his dressing room looking mildly 
disheveled. Other members of the team who saw that quietly took note... 
Ranma saw just precisely WHO was in Ryouga's arms and charged forward, 
cracking his knuckles, "Alright you little... what do you think you're 
doing?!"
	Akane merely had a surprised and sad look on her face, "All this 
time I thought he was still in love with Ukyou..." she murmured.
	Ryouga looked at the furious faces gathering around him... and the 
numerous curious ones... this... did not look good. It did not look good 
at all. He took a second look at the girl he was embracing. Her face 
hadn't changed at all. It was still Natsume.
	"This is not what it looks like!" He cried holding one arm out as 
if to ward them off, "This is SO not what it looks like!"
	Ukyou and Ranma asked simultaneously, "And what is it then, 
hmmm?!?!"
	Ranma cracked his knuckles individually, each one like a rifle 
crack, around him a pale blue aura was beginning to form... most people 
took note of this as well and backed off... Akane stared at it in 
surprise... no human should be able to do that...
	Ranko peeked in on the gathering and grinned at the sleeping 
Natsume, "Whoo! You go girl!"
	Akane turned to glare at Ranko.
	Natsume gave a small happy moan in her sleep as she pulled Ryouga 
even closer, pressing her chest into his side... people looked to one 
another and all agreed. This did not look good for Ryouga at all.
	This was precisely the scene as Mousse and Shampoo popped into 
view.
	"What's going on here?" Mousse demanded.
	"Ai-yah!" Shampoo blurted, murmuring to herself, "There whole lot 
of love on this production..."
	"I'm going to kill you!" Ukyou screamed at Ryouga.
	Mousse stepped in front of the enraged woman and said hurriedly, 
"You can't kill him! We still need him for the performance!"
	"Okay... fine..." Ranma muttered darkly, his aura flickering 
brightly around him, "We finish the performance, THEN Ukyou and I rip his 
lungs out."
	Mousse smiled at Ranma, "An excellent notion Saotome!"
	"Mousse you traitor!" Ryouga called out from his, let's face it, 
comfortable position.
	Mousse shrugged at Ryouga, "Sorry, Hibiki-kun."
	Shampoo looked quite worried, "But if we no find person to replace 
Sayuri we no can put up performance anyway!"
	"There is that." The bespectacled man conceded.
	Ukyou smiled coldly, "Does that mean we can rip Ryouga's lungs out 
now?"
	"What happened to Sayuri?" Akane asked.
	Shampoo replied, "She have bad-bad headache. No can perform."
	Ryouga, it must be noted was trying to get himself away from 
Natsume without waking her... it wasn't working...
	Mousse eyed Ukyou myopically, "Say... Kuonji-san... you're about 
Ranma's height, aren't you?"
	Ukyou gave Mousse a strange look, "Yes?"
	Mousse peered closer at her, adjusting his glasses. His gaze 
resting specifically on certain frontal portions of her anatomy, "And I'd 
venture about a 34 B..."
	Shampoo blushed and gave Mousse a thump on the back of the head 
with the clipboard, "Mousse-sempai look like pervert doing that!"
	Ukyou gave Mousse a quick annoyed whack with her spatula, "What 
does that have to do with anything?!"
	Mousse grabbed onto Ukyou's ankles, "Please! You have to take 
Sayuri's role! You'll fit right into the costume and you've been here 
every night! She's only got two lines! Please!!!"
	Ukyou only gave a startled cry. Ranma blinked in surprise at that, 
his aura guttering out. 
	Shampoo thumped Mousse repeatedly with the clipboard, "Mousse-
sempai! Show some dignity!"
	"Wha..? Me? But I..." Ukyou struggled to free herself of Mousse.
	"PLEEEEEEEAAAAAASE!!!!"
	Ryouga frowned slightly, "Hey! Sayuri's role is as Ranma's wife in 
the early part of the play isn't it?"
	"Yeah it is." Ranma answered.
	"No way!" Ryouga shouted in a jealous rage, "I forbid you from 
taking that role!"
	"It's just a play, Ryouga... what are you getting so jealous for?" 
Ranko murmured playfully. "Worried he's going to charm her permanently 
away from you?"
	"I'm not jealous!!" Ryouga shouted at her.
	Ukyou's eyes narrowed, "You forbid me?" She stomped towards Ryouga 
dragging the unresisting Mousse along, "YOU? Forbid... ME? You haven't 
got any right to do that you jackass! We aren't engaged anymore! If I 
want to take the role, I'll take the role!"
	"Um... maybe forbid was too strong a term to use?" Ryouga tried 
weakly.
	Mousse muttered from her ankles, "Please say you'll take the 
role..."
	"I'm taking it," She shouted at Mousse stomping back to Ranma and 
linking her arm with hers, "Choke on THAT Hibiki!"
	"Erhm?" Ranma managed.
	Akane cleared her throat and took Ranma's other arm, giving Ukyou a 
quizzical look.
	Ranko stepped quietly behind Ranma and whispered in his ear, 
"Mmmm... my aren't we popular Saotome.
	Natsume yawned awake at about this point and was surprised to find 
herself and Ryouga surrounded, "Oh... um... this is awkward..."
	Mousse hopped to his feet, grinning madly, "Excellent! Now that 
everyone's up we can do another run through and hopefully we'll get it 
right this time!"
	Everyone groaned in unison.

	"Very well, you little thieves!" Natsume proclaimed in a laughing 
voice, "I will allow each of you to take one item from my jewelry box, 
but only one." She continued holding up a finger.
	"Very well, mother." Ranko said airily, "Ahh... what is this?"
	"It appears to be a golden comb..." Akane replied.
	Ranko suddenly put her hands to her hips, "Ahh... feh. Who are we 
kidding?"
	"Ranko! Stop breaking out of character!" Akane snapped at her.
	"The guys in the props department still haven't found something for 
us to use as a golden comb." Ranko sighed, "This is kinda pointless."
	"We may as well keep practicing you know. We've only got a few more 
hours til curtain and I'm sure they'll come up with something." Ukyou 
replied from the corner. Natsume looked thoughtful for a moment and 
seemed as if about to say something.
	The four women were in Akane's dressing room going over their lines 
one last time. After the third muffed run-through Mousse had told them 
rather despondently to go off and get some rest. They were already in 
costume and doing their best to go over their lines. The rest of the cast 
had gone off for some lunch, but the paper plates bearing remnants of 
okonomiyaki scattered about the dressing room were all that remained of 
the four women's meal.
	"I don't know... my heart isn't exactly filled with confidence, 
with Mousse in charge of this thing." Ranko sighed.
	"Or Ryouga..." Ukyou muttered darkly.
	"Ukyou-nesama, I know you and Ryouga-sama had some problems in the 
past, but is it really fair to stay angry at him for so long?"
	Ukyou tsked at Natsume, "If we hadn't cleared up your sleeping next 
to him sooner, I'm not sure what Ranma and I would've done to him."
	Natsume's eyes glazed over a slight goofy smile on her face as she 
clapped her hands together, "But he's such a handsome and honorable guy, 
how could you..."
	"You didn't get left at the altar by him." Ukyou snapped at her.
	"Are you jealous?" Natsume asked, eyes narrowing slightly. "Is that 
what it is?"
	Akane stepped between the two, holding her hands up, "Hold it! 
Wait, this bickering isn't getting us anywhere, besides I thought we had 
it all sorted out, nothing happened."
	Ranko smirked, "True enough, but there's a lot that can happen 
with... ahem... nothing happening."
	"What're you..?" Akane started.
	Ranko sidled up to Natsume, putting an arm around her shoulders 
playfully, "So... did you at least get a kiss off of him? Or get a nice 
long feel of those muscles..? Or maybe..." she whispered something into 
Natsume's ear.
	Natsume's eyes widened, "Ranko! What a thing to say!"
	"Honestly!" Akane sighed at Ranko.
	Ranko grinned at Ukyou, "Perhaps a learned opinion over there? How 
DOES Ryouga kiss, Ukyou?"
	Ukyou's face clouded as she folded her arms, "He's not bad a 
kisser... not as good as Ranm... I mean... um..." she realized what she 
nearly said and blushed deeply.
	Akane, Ranko and Natsume's eyes all suddenly widened, "WHO?!"
	Natsume bounced over to Ukyou, "You actually kissed big bro?"
	Akane needless to say was in shock. 
	A slow catty smile spread over Ranko's features, "You did, didn't 
you?"
	Ukyou blushed, "Hey! Aren't we supposed to be practicing?!"
	Natsume grinned, "Yeah, but this is more interesting. When was 
this? Tell!"
	The redhead nodded in agreement, "Well if you don't want to talk 
about it, that's fine, but he IS a very good kisser."
	Ukyou and Natsume turned quickly to look up at Ranko, "You kissed 
him too?!"
	"Mmmm... yes. Full on the lips, at least a full minute, right 
Akane?" Ranko grinned, turning to look at the now glaring young goddess.
	Akane grumbled something under her breath, "You don't exactly have 
to brag about it you know."
	Natsume looked puzzled, "But I thought Akane was his fiance?"
	Ukyou, glad that the heat was off her, "I still don't understand 
their relationship and I've known about the three of them for months..."
	"I am his girlfriend, yes." Akane said in a tight controlled voice, 
stomping to Ranko, "It's just that SOME people can't seem to control 
themselves!"
	Ranko laid a hand on her chest and replied innocently, "But he 
seemed so enthusiastic..."
	"He was fighting for air, you idiot!" Akane snapped back.
	"Which is only distracting us from the original point which was, 
Ukyou kissing Ranma..." Ranko deflected, smiling at Ukyou.
	"Wait, wait, wait... to think I always thought of my bro as the shy 
type... well, let's get to Ukyou in a moment, but I guess this means 
you've kissed him too, right?" Natsume asked Akane.
	"Um... well..." Akane shifted uncomfortably.
	Ranko's jaw dropped, "You mean you two still haven't even kissed 
after all this time?!"
	"We have. Sort of. Well, I'm not like you okay?!" Akane snapped at 
her.
	"You've got to be kidding! I heard you were spotted with him 
walking into a love motel!" Ranko sputtered.
	"No kidding?" Natsume boggled, "Wow, I didn't realize 'Nichan had 
gotten so... so bold."
	"It's not what you think!" Akane shouted. 
	"Yeah it probably isn't," Ranko smirked, "I mean neither of you 
would dare..."
	Akane continued glaring at Ranko as the red head turned to the 
blushing Ukyou, "So... about your kiss with Ranma?"
	"Hey, wait! I want to hear about 'Nichan in a love motel!"
	"Fine we'll have Akane tell us later, Ukyou first." Ranko grinned.
	"Er... it's no big deal... we were still in high school, we'd just 
finished the only real date we ever had then he kissed me goodnight. 
Actually I kissed him... it was... nice." Ukyou still seemed a bit 
embarrassed, stealing an occasional glance at Akane, but there was a 
certain dreamy undertone to her voice as she remembered.
	Akane gave a defeated sigh. She drew a breath, getting ready to say 
something when the door suddenly burst open and a purple haired woman 
rushed into the room, "Ai-yah! Still no comb! No one find any golden 
comb! Mousse say he make play 'Black Hairbrush' and we hope no one 
notice!"
	"I knew it." Ranko sighed languidly.
	"Ranko-sempai, what happen to twin, Ryouko-sempai?" Shampoo 
blinked.
	"You have a twin?" the other three girls asked simultaneously. 
Akane's eyes narrowed, knowing only one possible person THAT could be.
	"She's around..." Ranko replied vaguely.
	"Well if see her, better say Mousse-nisama tell everybody not with 
varsity go away. Close up backstage."
	"I will if Ryouko shows up again, but I don't think she will." 
	"In meantime Shampoo have to go look for comb to use... that or 
change all signs."
	"Well the play doesn't hinge on the comb right entirely, right..? 
Akane asked slowly.
	"But is title! Is major plot part! Is too-too important!"
	"Hey, I think I've got something that could fit the bill!" Natsume 
said after a moment, "Just let me root through my purse if it's still... 
in... here... aha! Got it!" as she pulled out what appeared to be a small 
plain-looking and battered metal hair comb, a dull metallic yellow in 
color.
	"Hey, I recognize that. Didn't Ranma give it to you on your 
fourteenth birthday?" Ukyou remarked, looking at it.
	Natsume giggled, "Actually, I found it in his sock drawer looking 
for my gifts."
	"I remember now! He forgot to buy you anything so he let you keep 
it." Ukyou snickered.
	"He didn't even know how it got in there..." Natsume added.
	"That perfect!" Shampoo said taking the comb in her hand, "Okay, 
maybe it not perfect, but it close enough!"
	Ranko blinked in surprise as she stood up next to Shampoo peering 
at the comb, "Hey, Akane! Doesn't this thing remind you of that thing we 
used to have when we were kids?"
	"What thing?" Akane asked, perplexed.
	"You used to have a comb like this when we were... I don't know... 
ten or something? I remember I kept trying to take it away from you."
	Akane moved closer to Shampoo who was still turning the comb this 
way and that in her hand, "You did? I don't remember."
	"Yeah... I don't remember what happened to it either... I think you 
lost it somewhere." Ranko said uncertainly.
	"I really don't remember at all," Akane said a small frown on her 
face.
	Natsume giggled, "That would be funny."
	"What would?" Ukyou asked.
	"What if the comb is actually Akane's but somehow Ranma found it 
somewhere, then tucked it in his sock drawer, forgot about it and ended 
up giving it to me?" Natsume smiled.
	"Wow! Big-big coincidence."
	Ranko looked at Akane who traded a confused glance back to her, 
"Nah... I don't think so." The cousins said simultaneously.
	Ranko shrugged elegantly. At least she hoped it wasn't... the 
potential implications of THAT would be... 
	"Comb look okay. Shampoo borrow it for while Natsume-san?"
	"No problem, Shampoo." Natsume replied.
	"Curtain in hour and half! Everybody make sure make up and costume 
is ready!" And with that Shampoo left the room, murmuring softly to 
herself, "Maybe if use metal polish..."
	"Where were we anyway?" Akane asked.
	"Your last line was '...golden comb'," Natsume replied, "Then I 
say, 'Ahh... how did that get in there?'"
	"Right."

	Show time. The house was packed. Pretty much everyone from the 
university was there. Not to mention quite a number of last minute 
arrivals when word got out the Ukyou would also be participating. No 
small number of Office Ladies and other students managed to finagle 
tickets from scalpers. Suffice it to say they would most likely be 
surprised if they'd known before hand what Ukyou's actual role was. 
	Nabiki was standing just off stage with Mousse. Nabiki was giving 
him a small, satisfied smile. He simply looked close to collapse.
	"Our final net take, less taxes, expenses, accounting and handling 
fees..."
	"What accounting and handling fees?!
	"Mine, of course."
	"You never said anything about..."
	"I sincerely hope you aren't thinking of NOT paying me..."
	"Erhm..."
	"In ANY case, here's how much the Varsity made." As she flashed him 
her calculator where a certain figure had just been tapped onto the 
screen.
	Even behind his glasses, Mousse's eyes boggled, "That much..?" he 
whispered.
	Nabiki grinned.
	Mousse returned the grin. Life... was good. And with that 
befuddled, caffeine-addled grin pasted to his face, Mousse promptly 
collapsed into a deep sleep.
	Nabiki smiled and slipped a few pieces of papers into Mousse's 
hand... orders signed by him. Not exactly what he would've said himself, 
but close enough to suit her. Price paid, she smiled. 
	She glanced in Shampoo's direction as the purple haired amazon 
adjusted her glasses worriedly, running up to Mousse.

	Outside the audience was getting restless. Admittedly, it was still 
ten minutes to curtain time, but the majority of this group was composed 
of people who weren't exceptionally good at waiting. There were 
exceptions, of course. Kasumi Tendo for instance, who was seated front 
row center was engaged in a rather fascinating if one-sided conversation 
with the people to either side of her. One of who appeared to be asleep. 
The other looked about ten years old.
	Backstage, people rushed back and forth as last minute preparations 
were being completed.
	"Who's got my hairpiece?!"
	"What happened to the winch?!
	"Gosunkugi, you're supposed to be OUTSIDE to take the photos!"
	"Who has my facepaint?"
	"Put those away for later!"
	"Flower delivery for Ranko Tendo... flowers for Ranko!"
	"Over here!"
	"Who're they from Ranko?" 
	"Oh no, not him again..."
	"Not who again?"
	"Oooh, a bouquet of red roses? These're expensive..."
	"Where's the card?"
	"It was here somewhere." 
	"I'd rather not talk about it."
	"Tatewaki Kuno?" a number of voices chorused.
	"Orders from Mousse-sempai!"
	"Last minute script change AGAIN?! Who authorized this?"
	"Who else, sugar?"
	"Use our real names? But why?!"
	"No ask Shampoo, is Mousse-sempai order."
	"Where is he!?!"
	"He sleep. You no interrupt, Ryouga-sempai..."
	Suffice it to say that chaos was a mild, though appropriate, word 
to use.
	But that was then and this was now. The packed theatre began to 
darken... and the curtain began to rise.

	"Once upon a time," a reedy, yet somber voice spoke, "There were 
two noble samurai families that served under a powerful daimyo."
	The stage lit up showing two sets, the interiors of two homes with 
the middle of the stage done up obviously to represent the street. As the 
lights illuminated the house on the left, Ranma in a resplendent red and 
black brocaded kimono wearing a rather convincing fake mustache and his 
ponytail tucked under his collar, sat next to a beaming Ukyou, also in a 
similar kimono. To the right sat a rather disgruntled looking Ryouga, in 
a kimono of gold and black, an adoring Natsume clinging to his arm 
looking quite ecstatic.
	Spontaneous applause broke out among the audience.
 	"I believe," Ranma spoke, "I shall visit my old friend Ryouga." 
There seemed to be a slight angry emphasis on the word 'friend'.
	Ukyou smiled demurely at him, then cast a glare in the general 
direction of the other house, "Oh, yes. It has been a while since you saw 
him." Angry emphasis on him.
	Ranma nodded slowly, "Yes... why don't you get some rest, darling. 
I will just be a moment."
	They both stood, Ranma helping Ukyou up. Ukyou as she stood 
appeared to be well into the advanced stages of pregnancy, her stomach 
swollen immensely, looking ready to give birth at any moment. Her earlier 
posture had hidden it.
	As Ukyou glided offstage, Ranma began to walk towards the other 
half of the set.
	Ryouga suddenly perked, "Ahh... I think I hear Ranma coming over." 
His voice was light and perhaps almost cheerful, but his face looked as 
if it were set in stone.
	Natsume smiled at him and simpered, "Oh, he hasn't been by in so 
long, but I suppose with his wife's pregnancy he has been quite busy."
	Ryouga's face darkened, "Yes... Ukyou's pregnancy..."
	Ranma finally opened the door to Ryouga's home and strode in, 
smiling, "Ryouga, how are you my friend?" his smile was fixed but looked 
ready to fall off.
	"Ranma! How good to see you!" Ryouga said with little enthusiasm, 
bearing a similar smile.
	"Well... I believe I shall leave you two to talk..." Natsume said 
rising to her feet. She too was hugely pregnant as she glided offstage.
	The two men stood staring at each other smiling for a long while. 
Their stares challenging. 
	"So... how's Ukyou?" Ryouga asked with false cheer.
	"Oh, she's _wonderful_ the doctor says she could give birth as 
early as this very evening. And how's Natsume, Hmmm..?" Ranma asked 
pointedly.
	"She's also well. Our doctor also says she could give birth 
tonight." Ryouga replied.
	There was a pregnant pause.
	"Well." Ranma said. Their staring match resuming.
	"Well, well." Ryouga replied.
	There was another long pause.

	From the audience there were already quite a number of murmurs, 
"Aren't they supposed to be friends?", "I remember this story, maybe 
they're trying to add in backdrop?", "What that the samurai Ranma is 
playing is married to someone the samurai Ryouga is playing is in love 
with? No way...", "Why not?", "Interesting start...", "Didn't that 
Natsume look cute?"
	From offstage, Shampoo whispered fiercely, "Say next line!"

	"Well," Ranma continued finally, "Seeing as how we've been friends 
for so long, what do say if we were perhaps to cement the union?"
	"What do you mean?"
	"Well, since our wives are pregnant and could give birth any day 
now... if one of our children is a girl and the other a boy..."
	"... perhaps we should engage them to be married when the time 
comes?" Ryouga interrupted.
	"Precisely."
	"I like the idea." Ryouga said unenthusiastically.
	"Let's shake on it." Ranma smiled falsely.
	"Yes." said Ryouga, grasping Ranma's outstretched hand...
	They clasped hands and there were long moments as both their faces 
strained.

	Shampoo finally realized what was going on and called out in a 
harsh whisper to the two freshmen, "Fade lights!"
	Ranma and Ryouga continued to squeeze each other's hands as the 
lights dimmed to darkness. There was the sound of feet stomping across 
the stage followed by two quick whacks and a soft voice with a sing-song 
Chinese accent muttering fiercely, "Do play right or Shampoo withhold 
both you pay!"

	The reedy voice started again, "And so it came to pass that that 
very night, a boy was born to Ranma's family who in his pride named the 
child after himself and a girl was born to Ryouga's family, who was named 
Ranko.
The lights turned on again for a moment to depict the two proud fathers, 
in each of the their homes, smiling as their respective wives held small 
bundles in their arms... from each bundle small pigtails stuck out.
	"Thus, the agreement that when the boy and the girl were to be 
betrothed to one another was sealed between the two fathers..." as the 
voice spoke, Ranma and Ryouga approached each other, bearing happy smiles 
that didn't reach their eyes, bowed formally to each other. 
	"As a bride price and a gift to seal the betrothal, Ranma gave to 
Ryouga's family, with all due pomp, a beautiful golden comb."
	At this Ranma said, "Here ya go." And flipped a glittering golden 
object into Ryouga's hand who glared at him. There were brief titters 
from the audience. From offstage Shampoo gave an agonized groan.
	Ranma with an arm around Ukyou's shoulders walked off stage. Their 
heads low. Ryouga's face was impassive as he stood next to Natsume, who 
was still holding the little bundle with the red pigtail.
	"And many years passed and things changed." The voice continued, as 
the curtain dropped...
	From behind the curtain were a number of muffled cursings and 
rattlings. As the curtain rose again, Ryouga's home was now center stage, 
around it were what appeared to be gardens.
	The lights illuminated Ryouga sitting happily at a dinner table, 
next to him was Natsume. Their hair appeared lighter colored, Ryouga's 
hair was shot through with silver.
	"Ryouga prospered and his family grew by one more after the birth 
of a second daughter, Akane."
	Ranko and Akane walked onstage. Ranko skipping merrily along and 
Akane gliding in with serene dignity. There was loud applause and 
catcalls from the audience, Ranko taking a moment now and then to wave to 
them or to wink as someone. Ryouga nodded once and stood up, smiling 
fondly at the two. Ryouga walked offstage.
	"The two daughters, were so different in temperament that many were 
amazed that they were sisters. The elder, Ranko was lively, happy and 
playful, while Akane was the more sedate and calm."

	Ranko whispered to Akane, too low for the audience to hear, "What a 
lie..."
	Akane turned to glare at Ranko. The audience noticed this. 

	"But despite this, the two sisters were devoted to each other."
	"Mother!" Ranko called merrily out to Natsume, "See what Akane and 
I have found!"
	Natsume saw the box in Ranko's hands and raised an eyebrow, "Ahh... 
what have you found indeed. If I did not know better, I would say that 
that is my jewelry box." She smiled fondly.
	Akane nodded, "We found it in your room mother and would ask if we 
could look through it, perhaps for a little something for ourselves?" she 
asked hopefully.
	"Very well, you little thieves!" Natsume proclaimed in a laughing 
voice, "I will allow each of you to take one item from my jewelry box, 
but only one." She continued holding up a finger. Ranko and Akane set the 
box down onto the table, opening it eagerly.
	"Very well, mother." Ranko said airily, "Ahh... what is this?" as 
she held up the golden comb.
	"It appears to be a golden comb..." Akane replied in a surprised 
tone.
	"Ahhh... I thought that had been long since lost! I'm afraid not, 
my daughters, ask for any other item, but not this."
	"Why not, mother?" Ranko pouted, "You said we could have one item, 
and I believe I like this one."
	Natsume looked down, regret obvious on her face, "That comb has a 
tragic story attached to it, my daughter. I fear you would not want it if 
you but knew..."
	"Why not tell us mother?" Akane asked, eyes shining eagerly, "It 
seems so lovely, how could it have such tragedy?"
	"I will tell you then," Natsume said composing herself, "When Ranko 
was born, that same night, so too was born the son of one of your 
father's friends... another nobleman... his son, was betrothed to you, 
Ranko."
	Ranko's face showed surprise, "Why wasn't I told of this before?"
	"Alas..." Natsume said, continuing regretfully, "Many years ago, 
before even Akane was born, the family of your betrothed was exiled by 
the daimyo. There was no explanation given and that nothing had happened 
to stain their family honor, but it was deemed necessary that they 
leave."
	"How sad." Akane murmured.
	Ranko held the comb tightly in her hand, her eyes shining, "You 
mean, there is someone out there who is meant for me? My betrothed is 
somewhere out there and I not only have never seen him, but will in all 
likelihood never see him?"
	"I'm afraid so, my daughter." Natsume replied, lightly stroking 
Ranko's hair.
	The lights dimmed and the spotlight turned on Ranko who sat at the 
table, still beautifully posed. She gazed longingly at the comb, "I do 
not know you... I will never know you... and yet... I suddenly feel so 
incomplete, where once I was a whole, now I am no more than half..."
	Ranko rose slowly to her feet pacing the stage slowly...
	The narrator's voice spoke, "The hours stretched into days... the 
days to weeks and the weeks to months... Ranko pined away for her unknown 
betrothed... for sight unseen, she had fallen in love with him and longed 
to meet him that they could be complete... but still he did not appear, 
and she knew it was futile, but still she pined for him..."
	The spotlight followed Ranko as she paced the stage, until she 
slipped into a futon off to one side and lay quietly, the comb still 
tight in her grasp.
	"Until at last she died of a broken heart. Longing for her 
betrothed."
	Around Ranko Ryouga, Natume and Akane gathered heads bowed in 
silence, weeping softly.

	From the opposite end of the stage, a bedraggled Ranma, now in 
tatters, the false moustache gone and his pigtail free lurched slowly 
across the stage, followed by a second spotlight, just as the first began 
to fade.
	"Exactly one year had passed since Ranko's unfortunate demise when 
Ranma appeared, son of Ryouga's friend, the elder Ranma, Ranko's 
betrothed."
	The stage lit up again, Ryouga alone at the table, watching Ranma 
warily as he approached.
	"May I help you?" Ryouga asked coldly.
	"Um... sir, my name is Ranma..." Ranma bowed.
	"I had a friend named Ranma once..." Ryouga said thoughtfully.
	"I know, sir. I'm his son."
	"What?" Ryouga spoke, "No... really? What happened to you? You look 
terrible!" he stood up.
	"I know sir... since my family's exile our fortunes have taken a 
turn for the worse... both my parents are dead and I am all that is 
left."
	"I'm sorry to hear that."
	"I.... I came here to honor my father's last wish, sir."
	"And that is?" Ryouga asked.
	"He told me about the betrothal just before he died. I know I don't 
have much, sir, but I'm willing to work hard and I have a strong back. 
Allow me to work in your service until such time as I can prove worthy of 
my betrothed and I will..."
	Ryouga's eyes grew sad as he looked at Ranma, "Oh, my boy... I'm so 
terribly sorry. You have arrived too late. My daughter has been dead this 
long year. I'm afraid you have come here for nothing."
	Ranma looked stricken.
	"But if you wish to work for me, I shall be more than happy to 
accept your service... you are the son of my oldest friend and I couldn't 
possibly turn you away. Live in my home, work upon my grounds and I shall 
treat you as you deserve."
	"That is very magnanimous of you, sir."
	"Not at all..." Ryouga replied getting to his feet and clapping an 
arm around Ranma's shoulders, "Walk this way... how much gardening 
experience have you had?" he asked as the lights faded again.

	"And so it came to pass... Ryouga took the younger Ranma into his 
service."
	As the lights came up again, Ranma walked around the new set, 
puttering with gardening tools. Most of the stage resembled nothing so 
much as a garden. To the left of the stage was a small cottage, open to 
the audience, which showed a futon and a desk.
	"Because of Ryouga's excellent treatment, Ranma found that he liked 
his new position in life and worked diligently for his master, tending to 
the grounds with the utmost care and devotion."
	As Ranma continued to work, Akane slowly walked across the stage... 
Ranma paused long enough to watch her, a longing look in his eye as she 
passed, but the narration continued, "He worked for many months, only 
occasionally catching glimpses of the family as he tended to his duties. 
His glimpses of the younger daughter Akane he treasured most, though he 
would scarce admit it to himself. Neither the younger daughter, nor 
Ryouga's wife was informed of his parentage, and it appeared to please 
both men."
	"Until one evening. That the family returned late from an 
engagement..."
	The lights dimmed somewhat and Ranma stood at the side of the stage 
away from the cottage. A large palanquin, covered and presenting only the 
silhouette of the three figures inside, was carried across the stage on 
the backs of several heavyset men... there was a slight flash and a 
tinkle as some object fell from the palanquin.
	Ranma bent over showing surprise as he picked the item up. The 
palanquin disappeared offstage and he held up the object which he had 
taken. It was the golden comb. Once more murmurs passed through the 
audience as Ranma contemplated it.
	"What's this? Ahh... the samurai's daughter must've dropped it as 
the palanquin passed." Ranma spoke aloud, "Well, it's late. First thing 
tomorrow morning I shall return it to her."
	And with that he slipped it into his pocket walked towards the 
well-lit cabin. He began pantomiming his preparations to go to bed... but 
as he did, in the darkened garden a figure began moving to and fro among 
the bushes, obviously searching for something.
	Ranma glanced out in surprise, "What could that be? An intruder? Or 
perhaps a ghost?" an expression of worry crossed his face just as a 
sudden loud knock came from his door, the gliding silhouette which had 
been searching the garden was now sanding next to it, knocking hurriedly.
	"Who is it?" Ranma called out.
	"It is Akane," the figure called out as a spotlight bloomed on her. 
	"Lady Akane?" Ranma asked in confusion as he opened his door. She 
stepped inside looking apprehensively at him.
	"It is so late at night, my Lady, what are you doing up?"
	"Have you found my comb? A golden comb? I must have lost it as we 
were returning and I must find it."
	"Oh. I did find something... is this it?" as he produced the comb.
	"Yes!" Akane said enthusiastically. Ranma handed it over to her 
wordlessly, but as she took it in her hands she swooned into his arms.
	Ranma blushed, "L-l-lady, Akane!"
	As her eyes opened a languid smile appeared on her face, her arms 
snaking up to encircle his neck, "My love... it is you..."
	"M-m-my lady..! This is..!" but before he could complete his 
statement, she pulled him down into a deep kiss, much to the delight of 
the audience.
	Ranma struggled briefly in surprise... this wasn't in the script! 
He thought to himself... but then again he should be enjoying himself... 
this was Akane... wasn't it... but then he blinked as the kiss ended...  
he knew that kiss... that particular guilty pleasure...
	To the audience it appeared as if Akane and Ranma clung to each 
other lovingly. In actuality Ranma was whispering harshly, "Ranko! That's 
you again!"
	"Mmm... you know me so well..." 'Akane' giggled softly.
	"Where's Akane? You're ruining the scene!" he continued whispering.
	"Ruining, nothing." She smirked, "The audience loves it. Now say 
your next line..."
	"But where's Akane?!"
	"In the bathroom... door's locked. She'll get out soon." She 
winked, "Next line, handsome."
	"Er... um... ah... my lady! What's come over you?!" Ranma said in a 
tight voice, trying to pull away.
	"You are the man who was betrothed to my sister those many years 
ago, were you not?"
	"I... yes, but how did you know?"
	"My father told me... and I have watched you these many months and 
the comb is but the last proof I need. I love you..." she said.
	Ranma gaped, "But... you... I..."
	"Please..." she begged, "I would be with you. Thought I know you 
were promised to my sister, let me fulfil the promise your father and 
mine made... come away with me..."
	"But my duty to your father... though I have often watched you... 
and I too have feelings for you. I l-l-lo..." Ranma tried to complete his 
line with difficulty.
	Shampoo frowned offstage, whispering, "Why Ranma-sempai having 
trouble saying word? He always get right in practice! What wrong?!"
	Ranko touched her fingers to his lips, silencing him, "Say no 
more... I know how you feel for me as well my love."
	"I can't leave..!"
	"Would you leave me alone then?"
	"I... I can't.
	"Let us quit my father's home this very night. If you will not 
then," she smiled slyly, "I shall call my father and scream loudly that 
you have forced your unwelcome attentions upon my young body... that you 
tore away at my clothing fully intending to ravage me and take me for 
your base lusts and savage pleasures." She opened the neckline of her 
kimono somewhat, exposing a bit of Akane's pale white shoulder to Ranma's 
view.

	A number of men in the audience got nosebleeds... offstage, Ryouga 
fainted. Shampoo simmered, muttering, "Ai-yah! That not on script either! 
Why Akane improvising?!"
	"Whoa I didn't know she'd do something like that..." Ukyou murmured 
back, standing next to Shampoo, "Looks more like something Ranko would 
do..."

	"If... if... whew... if you put it that way, fine then!" Ranma 
sputtered, "My father had a friend who lived near where we stayed during 
those years we were away, I figure I could crash there for a while..."

	Shampoo's jaw dropped, she muttered, "Now Ranma-sempai improvise!"

	The lights dimmed, and the narrator spoke up again, a trifle 
breathlessly, "Er... yes... So the two young lovers fled Ryouga's estate. 
And moved into their new home.
	The lights came up again to show Ranma and Akane smiling at each 
other, Ranma somewhat stiffly. A scene of domestic harmony as 'Akane', 
now wearing an apron and the golden comb in her hair, smiled lovingly at 
Ranma.
	"A year passed for the two of them... living as man and wife in all 
but name. Their love grew by leaps and bounds until they were practically 
inseparable. But exactly a year to the very day..."
	Ranma glanced out of one window, "Dear? There is a palanquin 
outside with your father's crest!"
	'Akane' gave a playful smile, "It means that it is time for us to 
return home, my love."
	Ranma turned to Akane incredulously, "Return? You demanded that we 
leave and now we simply return? Do you have any idea what he's liable to 
do to me for running away with his daughter?!"
	'Akane' winked saucily at him, "Do I hear complaining?"
	"Well... not precisely..."
	"Do this one last thing for me, my love. Let us return to my 
father. It is time."
	"If... if you say so." Ranma said still somewhat confused.
	The stage darkened once more, a spotlight focusing on the palanquin 
as it made its slow way across the stage. The silhouettes of Ranma and 
Akane obvious within.

	From offstage, Akane stomped loudly next to Ukyou, "Where is SHE?!" 
she whispered angrily.
	"Akane? If you're here... who's in there?!" Ukyou asked, glancing 
from the palanquin to the furious Akane.
	"Ranko."
	"Wow, our make up department is good... she looks just like you... 
but isn't she supposed to be in a later scene?"
	"I will KILL her." Akane muttered.
	"Better not, sugar. Your scene's coming up.
	Akane started, "Ohmigosh, you're right, scuse me..."

	As the palanquin reached the other end of the stage, the lights 
came back on, showing Ryouga and Natsume on the opposite end of the 
stage, sitting quietly at a table. Ranma looked back into the palanquin, 
"Why do you not alight? We are here."
	"Not yet," came Akane's voice from the palanquin. "Go ahead, speak 
to my parents. I shall wait her until you call."
	Ranma gulped nervously, "Are you certain?"
	"Of course..." her hand slipped out from the palanquin and pressed 
the comb into his hand. "If they do not believe you as you tell your 
tale, my love, show them this."
	"Provided I have enough time to speak and he does not kill me 
outright." Ranma replied, which she answered with a wry chuckle.
	He walked calmly across the stage. Behind him, the palanquin 
slipped away. As he reached the table Ryouga and Natsume were at, Ryouga 
surged to his feet, a furious expression on his face as he shouted, 
"YOU!"
	"I'm dead." Ranma muttered loudly enough for the audience to hear.
	Ryouga rushed forward, charging at Ranma, Ranma crouched, preparing 
himself for the worst, but as Ryouga reached him, he clapped Ranma on the 
hsoulders and said, "Where've you been? If you were so unhappy serving 
under me that you needed to leave you could've told me first. I would've 
given you references."
	"Ahh... er... so you're not mad?" Ranma smiled disbelieving.
	"Why would I be mad? A little disappointed in you perhaps, but not 
mad. Would you like your old job back?" Ryouga smiled.
	"Bu-bu-bu-but... you're taking this awfully calmly considering I 
just ran off with your daughter a year ago..." Ranma blurted out.
	Ryouga's face clouded in fury as he heaved Ranma off the ground. 
Natsume rose to her feet smoothly, frowning slightly, "Please do not make 
bad jests, Ranma... our daughter has been in bed all this past year. 
Sleeping so deeply that nothing we've done has been able to awaken her."
	"What? But that's impossible!" Ranma protested, "We've been living 
together for all of the last year, she told me I had to come back with 
her here... did you not send the palanquin which fetched us?"
	"We sent no palanquin," Ryouga replied, still holding Ranma up.
	"But it's right there!" as he pointed to the other side of the 
stage where the palanquin was already long gone, "Hey, where'd it go?"
	Natsume placed an hand on Ryouga's arm, "Perhaps his brain has been 
addled by his journies, my husband?" Ranma thought she was purring the 
last word slightly.
	Ryouga frowned a bit, "Perhaps."
	"Honestly! I swear it, she was with me, look!" Ranma said holding 
up the golden comb, "See? It is her golden comb... I've never seen her 
anywhere this past year without it."
	Both Ryouga and Natsume's eyes widened in surprise, "It's 
impossible!" they said at once.
	"What is?" Ranma asked stupidly.
	"But that comb was burried with our firstborn daughter, Ranko... 
how could you have it?" Natsume said, looking flustered.
	"But this is Akane's comb." Ranma protested.
	Natsume persisted, "That is the comb which was given as a 
brideprice for my firstborn daughter Ranko... but she died of heartbreak 
before the groom could come to her...
	Ranma seemed staggered, "She did? But I was to be her groom... my 
father and Lord Ryouga..."
	"No... impossible..." Natsume seemed shocked.
	Ryouga glowered, "Enough of this foolishness! Follow me, I shall 
show you!"
	As the lights dimmed, the three were caught in a spotlight as they 
walked across the stage, they doubled back, the light brightening again 
to see Akane lying in a futon sound asleep.
	"It is as we have told you. She has slept like this for the past 
year." Ryouga said in a soft voice which carried over the audience.
	Ranma fell to his knees next to her, "But it is impossible... she 
was with me the past year..."
	Natsume shook Ranma by the shoulder, "Come with me, young sir... we 
have disturbed her enough..."
	As the three moved away from the sleeping Akane, the lights dimmed 
once more, the spotlight returning to the three of them.
	"How can this be?" Ranma asked the parents.
	"We are baffled." Ryouga replied.
	"How could she have been with you and yet sleeping here this whole 
time?" Natsume added to their questions.
	"Perhaps I can answer that," Akane's voice spoke from out of 
nowhere. A second spotlight focused on her, coming towards them from the 
opposite end of the stage, she was dressed in beautiful layered robes, 
totally unlike her bedclothes.
	"You are awake!" Ryouga said, breaking into a relieved smile.
	"Yes father... and I am afraid I have a great deal of explaining to 
do to Ranma and to both of you..." 'Akane' (Ranma still wasn't certain if 
it was the real one or Ranko again but the scene called for Ranko) smiled 
demurely.
	"Please do." Natsume said.
	'Akane' shook her head once, her black hair becoming red, and long 
braid cascading down her back from out of nowhere, her features shifted 
subtly, "I am not Akane, but the spirit of Ranko."
	
	From the audience, gasps and murmurs of awe... after all... this 
was certainly better effects and make up than they expected.

	Ranko smiled lovingly at Ranma, "I'd loved him from even before I'd 
ever laid eyes on him... and I love him even more now, having known him 
for so long..."
	"But we thought you were dead!" Ryouga sputtered.
	"I was and I am." Ranko replied, "But I made a contract. That I be 
allowed one year to return to this world from the next that I could spend 
it with the man I loved..."
	"But why did you look like Akane?" Natsume asked.
	"I could not allow anyone to know who I was, not even my 
beloved..." as she stroked Ranma's face gently. Her eyes shining with 
emotion.
	Ranma couldn't help but swallow involuntarily... she isn't just 
acting... she really means it, he thought.
	"So I struck a deal with my sister... that I would borrow her face 
and form. For the one year I would spend on this world..."
	"So... all this time... I was with you..?" Ranma asked in a 
dumbfounded tone.
	"Yes, my love. But now my time is up... and I must return." Ranko 
continued, "I have loved every moment that we spent together, Ranma. 
Every single one. I do not regret this past year.
	"But..." Ranma felt odd... almost as if she trully were speaking to 
him. And not merely acting out her role... she couldn't be THAT good an 
actress... could she?
	"I have two last requests," Ranko said to Ranma, "I ask you not to 
mourn for me but to remember me only with happiness."
	"Yes.
	"Second, I wish for you to marry Akane when I have gone. For while 
I shared her face and form, she has also shared my feelings and 
thoughts... she loves you too. As deeply as I."
	The three stood mute. A palpable silence had descended on the 
audience as Ranko slowly lifted off the ground, floating perhaps a foot.
	Ranko turned to Ranma, leaning towards him and kissing him gently 
on the lips, "Four, Ranma. Four stolen kisses," she whispered to him, no 
one else hearing, "Each sweeter than the last... how I'm going miss you."
	"Ranko..." Ranma called out softly, his voice little more than a 
whisper.

	From offstage the two freshmen in charge of the winch gave the 
awed, though approving Shampoo a tap on the shoulder. She turned to them 
and whispered, "Ai-yah! Why you two not at winch?! What if Ranko have go 
up more?!"
	"That's what we came here to tell you! It shut down, the winch 
doesn't work!"
	"So how Ranko flying?" Shampoo asked, turning to look back at the 
stage.
	Everyone else merely watched.
	
	"Goodbye." Ranko said softly, spreading her arms, her body limned 
in light which cut through the audience.
	All anyone could do was watch.

	From the audience Kasumi's eyes widened in surprise, "Oh my... this 
is much too early!"
	The little girl with the long black hair in the charming black 
dress next to her simply smiled sweetly, "Looks just right to me..."
	From the wings, Nabiki signalled to Kasumi frantically, "It's too 
soon!" she mouthed.
	Kasumi could only shrug helplessly and watch in wonder.

	There was a final bright burst of light that caused everyone to 
sheild their eyes as Ranko vanished from sight.
	Ranma, Ryouga and Natsume, stood on stage, staring blankly at the 
spot where she had vanished. Ryouga murmured desperately to Ranma, "Was 
that in the script?"
	"How'd she do that?" Natsume whispered to them.
	As the lights brightened again and Akane stepped close to the 
group, "Hello, everyone. Hello, Ranma." She smiled tentatively.
	"Akane... that is you, right?" Ranma asked uncertainly. He didn't 
understand what was going on. 
	Akane nodded, moving towards him. "Yes..." there seemed to be a 
subtle change to her. He couldn't place it for certain, but somehow... he 
shook his head clear as he and Akane met in an embrace.
	"Um... this is yours, I think." Ranma said to her, pressing the 
comb into her hand. Her eyes lit up in recognition. There was a 
feeling... a curious sensation as if everything in the universe had 
suddenly gone 'click' as the pieces all slid into place. 
She grasped it tightly in her hand and looked up into his gray eyes, her 
voice a whisper, "I love you."
	Ranma stood in shock... he stared at her face, the face that had 
become so dear to him that he knew it better than his own, every line, 
every feature, from her goddess markings to her beautiful eyes... he knew 
for certain she had meant that. He knew to the depths of his soul that 
this wasn't acting. This was real. That was truth. The rock hard 
foundation of his entire existence, "I love you." He whispered back, with 
complete certainty.
	They simply stood for a moment, eyes locked, savoring the closeness 
and intimacy despite the audience. Everyone else had ceased to matter, 
there was only the two of them. Ranma leaned his head down. Akane lifted 
her lips to his.
 	They kissed. 
 	The long months of fear and uncertainty and hesitation forgotten.
	All that they'd gone through together... all for this moment.
	The years of waiting ended.
 	Time stopped. 
 	And then time roared anew as the applause broke out simultaneously 
everywhere.

	Kasumi joined in the applause, but there were tears in her eyes... 
beside her the little girl had vanished... thought the curtain slowly 
began to come down on Ranma and Akane's kiss... Kasumi knew with absolute 
unshakable uncertainty that the final curtain was still to come.

To be concluded...


Author's notes:
	Well folks here we are after a ridiculously long absence. A new 
chapter of THG. And what's even better is that things are finally drawing 
to the momentous climax. This particular chapter is still kind rough in a 
lot of places despite the fact I started writing this in October of last 
year, there's a lot of bits that could use serious improvement. 
Particularly the 'play' scenes. I'm also thinking to add in more scenes 
during the earlier parts showing them rehearsing their lines. So any 
comments would be a big help. 
	Also, though the story is coming to a close, it doesn't mean that 
this universe will have to die... after all, I've always thought of 
That's 1/2 My Goddess as being the OAV for a long running manga. While it 
tells the story, it leaves a lot out that could still be told. For 
instance, I never did get around to writing about Kodachi's plots... or 
Tatewaki Kuno's actual relationship with Ranko... Plus the various little 
hints I've placed throughout the story regarding Mousse and Shampoo and 
who is really in love with whom... or about Ukyou, Shampoo, Ranko and 
Akane's night out... and even the particular story where most of the cast 
gets turned into various animals due to a botched spell. I may yet write 
these as separate side stories, or perhaps I'll farm them out to someone, 
but that's still in the future since I'd need to finish part 10 itself 
before this series is officially over.
	Who knows when THAT will happen? ^_-