BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Heck, everyone else is writing additional parts.


TOTALLY INSANE AND SCREWED UP PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS
<cheesy fanfare>
THOSE OBNOXIOUS USA TODAY EDITORS

[It's a room with a computer in it, with me, Grant (Zon-Nan is my dad's name) 
sitting in it. There is a copy of USA Today with wooden crosses and mystic 
scrolls surrounding it.]

Grant: DAMN YOU USA TODAY!!! @#$%&*#$@!!!!!!!!!!! #@!%%!@$#!%^&*!!!!!! 
@%$#^%!^%^$#&@^&*(#^@&!!!!!!!!!!! #$&*(#^*(@^*@&*$&#*^@%$^&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[Grant takes a deep breath]
Grant: NOBODY INSULTS ANIME AND LIVES TO TELL ABOUT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[At USA Today HQ]
[It is a dark room with a man (Boss) sitting in a chair. We can't see his 
face. Another man walks in.]
Man: Sir?
Boss[in a Darth Vader voice]: What is it?
Man: The project is going according to plan. Soon, nobody will buy or watch 
anime. This incident with the seizures was the perfect oppertunity to heap 
blame on all anime. 
Boss: Excellent. Soon, all anime industries will go out of business. Then 
soon, manga will go out of business. My ultimate plan will then be excecuted. 
I WILL FORCE ALL ANIME AND MANGA ARTISTS TO WORK FOR ME!!!!! The reality 
machine will bring all of their female creations to life.
[The chair turns around. The boss is Happosai.]
Happosai:SOON, I WILL HAVE ALL OF YOU!!!!!!
[Goes into starry eyes]
Happosai: Ranma-chan, Akane-chan, Kodachi-chan, Shampoo-chan, 
Ukyo-chan, Lum-chan, Shinobu-chan, Ryu-chan, Ran-chan, Benten-chan,
Oyuki-chan, Sakura-chan, Nabiki-chan, Kasumi-chan, Chi-Chi-chan......
[several hours later...]
Happosai: Priss-chan. Ahh, I can see their panties now. GATHER ALL THE 
NYANNICHUAN IN JYUSENKO! I can imagine what the others would look like.
[goes into starry eyes]
Happosai: Odin-chan, Mackie-chan, Vegeta-chan, Kyosuke-chan,
Tenchi-chan...
[Many hours later..]
[Computer room from before]
Grant: $@^$#^#&@^%$&^&@*$#^&$%#&@^$&^#@(*$&@($^@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OKAY, THOSE ANIME HATING FREAKS ARE DEAD!!!!!!!!
[Grant hits a button]
Computer: Enter access code.
Grant: Barney should be burned alive and served with toothpicks.
Computer: Access granted.
[Somewhere in space]
[A huge satellite with the words GOLDENEYE, VERSION 6.0 is floating in space. 
Instead of firing, though, the camera pans to the right. There is a huge 
bucket. It slowly tips over, dumping it's contents.]
[Back at the USA Today HQ, a large mixture of salad oil, motor oil, animal 
fat, and kerosene splashes on the building.]
[Back in space, the Goldeneye satellite fires a huge pillar of flame down at 
the USA Today building.The 'hole (pun intended) building starts to burn. There 
is a huge explosion.]
[Grant closes his book]
Grant: and everyone lived happily ever after. Any C&C is welcome. Any MSTs are 
welcome. Anything is welcome. Flames will be printed and force-fed to my 
little sister.