R1/2 -- [Part 1] -- (Chris Collins) 1clc0772@unixstew.tstc.edu
[This is where the Ranma 1/2 fanfic disclaimer should've gone--y'know, the
one that says that the author isn't tryin to lay any claim to any of the
already-copyrighted characters of Takahashi's impressive little world--but
the author was too damn lazy to put one here, so I, the mysterious voice
from oblivion, have to do something to save this guy's ass from an
embarrassing series of lawsuits. And I'm only gonna say this once for the
whole six chapters! So don't come cryin to me if you don't see any more
disclaimers and start worrying about this poor smuck's life! And by the
way, those characters appearing in the story that are of the author's own
creation--those aren't my problem and you can steel the idea if you see
fit. See if I care.]
* * * * *
Nii hou! Tho, I'm sorry to inform you that this is not Shampoo speaking.
It's only me, Christopher Lee Collins, a humble writer not unlike any other
writer of fiction--though some may disagree with me one way or another--and
I am now about to compose for you what I hope to be a fabulous Ranma tale
about overcoming an overwhelming obstacle which Ranma and Akane will have
to reconcile their differences and........... Oh Hell....... It's another
story where Ranma and the gang end up beating the crap out of their enemy.
I've recently become a Ranma fan, tho not yet as fanatical as the friend
who got my involved with Ranma in the first place, who incidentally is also
writing a fanfic. (Yeah, he also has a bad habit of not finishing the
stories he starts--at least five novels breaking off at chapter four--so
he'll probably be finished by the time Hell freezes over.) I intend to
follow Takahashi format as well as I can. If I screw up, then I guess I'll
just have to go to Tokyo and live with them a few more years--no really, I
had a place in the back (I just hardly came out, so you never saw me in the
manga) (p.s. I think Akane likes me).
Now, let the story begin.
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The screen fades from black and shows a beautiful orange sun setting over
Tokyo. All is quiet. A low, somber violin starts playing in the background.
----------===================------------
| An Iron Dagger Production |
----------===================------------
A darkened figure rises above the horizon on an almost deserted street.
The sun is directly behind him, making him seem darker still to the few
passers-by. Everyone stops in his wake to look upon him with a mixture of
awe and fear. A steady set of drumbeats whisper to the accompanyment of
the violin, giving the music an almost primitive nature.
-----------===================------------
| Writen and Directed by: |
| Christopher Lee Collins |
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He returns no one's stare and says not a word as he makes his way down the
street. As the sun sinks lower into the earth, the stranger comes more
into focus. He wears a dark brown robe and cowl, as a monk would. An
eerie wind follows him and lightly blows the folds of his fabric. His face
is enveloped in complete darkness, so his features are unreadable, but
ocassionally, someone could catch a glimpse of an orange-furred chin or a
gleam of sharp, white teeth; anyone that noticed quickly moved on, but the
stranger paid no attention.
------------===================------------
| Based on characters created by: |
| Rumiko Takahashi |
------------===================------------
The stranger suddenly halted his progress as if momentarily startled. But
then a wicked smile radiated from within his darkened hood. His robe
flowed in the light breeze, but only shadows could be seen underneath. The
street was now empty. The stranger turned and looked up at the sign:
"Ucchan's." The violin strokes become more drawn out as the drum beats
more rapidly.
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| Ranma Saotome and Akane Tendo |
| in: |
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Instantly, the music ceases as the stranger brings his hand up to the
door....
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| "Hellcats" |
| Part I |
| "Love is a Boulder" |
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Ukyou looked up and saw a small, meek-looking, boyish priest with yellow
hair and a dark robe walk in. She was about to declare that she was
closing for the day, but something about his face looked too pitiful to
turn away.
She offered, "May I help you?"
He clasped his hands and peered about nervously, then spoke up in a shaky
and somewhat nasally voice: "Oh, dear. Oh.... If it wouldn't trouble you
too much, could you tell me how to find... ah... Ranma Saotome?"
Ukyou's eyes widened slightly. "Ranma?" She mouthed the name of her
childhood crush without even realizing she had. She would have loved to
have an excuse to go see him again. "Just give me a few minutes to lock up
and I can take you to him."
The priest smiled and gave a slight bow. "Oh, bless you. Thank you."
* * * *
Ukyou walked down the lamplit streets wearing her usual cooking weaponry
(just in case), the unexpected visitor silently trailing. She looked back
at him now and again to make sure he was there. His footfalls made no
noise and when he wasn't talking, it was like he wasn't there--although she
knew other people that could do that *sigh*. He would ocassionally comment
about respecting trees and plants as he admired the scenery, especially
when they took a short detour through the park. It was almost like
listening to a documentary of ferns on the National Geographic Special,
where the anouncer abruptly starts and stops speaking while different
camera shots of foliage go by.
Finally, she couldn't stand to listen to his prattle any longer. "So, how
do you know Ranma?"
The small priest winced at the name. "Oh, dear. I'd done a bad thing to
him once. I'm so ashamed. I wish to finally make it up to him somehow."
Ukyou sighed. Sounded familiar. She still felt bad for trying to kill
him earlier that month. Before he started going back into trees again, she
prodded: "What's your name?"
"My frinds call me Kenny. Oh, dear. I hope Ranma can forgive me.
Terrible. Terrible."
After that, he seemed to go back into deep regret, muttering about
hurting trees and not knowing what he was doing. Ukyou gritted her teeth,
just wanting him to shut up. She didn't want to have to break out her
spatulas.
As if answering her unsaid plea, the Tendo dojo started to come into view.
"Oh look, we're almost there." She quickened her pace.
She got up to the door and paused. The lights were on inside and she
could here talking, but couldn't make out the words. She forgot about the
priest--well, actually, she forgot about everything. All she could focus
on was the door, which almost seemed like an insurmountable obstacle that
she had to pass--but did she want to? She didn't exactly know what to say,
especially knowing that Akane would most likely be on the other side. She
might not be as welcome as she thought.
Just then, the door slid to the side and in the doorway stood Kasumi amid
a sea of friendly laughter and complaints from the others; she held her
long brown hair close to her body as she usually did when she felt unsure
of herself. "Ukyou?"
With the mention of her name, everyone in the room fell silent and turned
to stare wide-eyed at her. In the moment of silence, Ukyou felt like a
great weight was bearing her down and she wanted to run, although her easy
posture was unaffected. Ranma in male form, Akane, Nabiki, and Mr. Tendo
were sitting around some boardgame while Mr. Saotome, in panda form, was
sitting on a recliner with a newspaper in his hand.
Finally breaking the freeze-frame, Ranma's face widened into a smile.
"Hey, Ucchan, long time no see!" She felt releaved.
Akane glanced at him, stunned, then grunted in disapproval. "Ranma...."
"Oh Akane. Can't you see she wants to be friends now." Akane started to
say something more, but saw no use and shook her head into the palm of her
hand.
Mr. Panda grawfed a bit nervously and held up a wooden sign {{Hello}}.
Kasumi stepped to one side and smiled. "Would you like to come in?"
Ukyou fidgeted a bit, trying to find the words to say. Everyone looked at
her more curiously. "Well, I really should get back to the shop. I just
came here to show this priest...where... you... lived(?). Ukyou looked
behind her and around the front porch in confusion as she tried to locate
the annoying monk, but he was nowhere to be seen.
Everybody looked at her with the same curiosity as when she appeared at
the door. She turned back to the onlookers, smiled nervously, and shrugged
her shoulders.
* * * *
Ranma's eyes were deptless glass spheres staring sightlessly through
Ukyou. "You... ran... in... to... Kenny?" The words trickled out of his
mouth like a leaky faucet, with a special emphasis on "Kenny."
They were all sitting around the low table overlooking the backyard pond
as they dicsussed why Ukyou had decided to visit. Akane softly and
askingly called Ranma's name, trying to bring him back to reality as Mr.
Panda panicked in a flurry of signs. The remaining Tendos shifted their
gazes from Ranma to Ukyou, not completely understanding what the problem was.
Mr. Panda finally shrugged and calmed down because no one paid any
attention to his signs anymore, and everyone was quiet once more as they
watched Ranma stare into nothing. "Ranma?" Akane tried one more time but
with no response.
Nabiki was getting tired of the mystery and had to speak up. She propped
her head up on one elbow. "So, Ukyou darling, did this new guy want to
kill or marry Ranma?" The sudden breach of silence forced everyone to
stare at her. Nabiki shrunk back alittle, then defended herself with,
"Well, we can't just sit here all night watching my sister moon over
sleeping beauty there."
Akane turned away and folded her arms. "I wasn't mooning. I was trying
to wake him up."
Her face remained expressionless. "Why don't you try kissing him?"
Akane turned to her sibling and snapped, "I don't want to kiss that
pervert!" She maintained her disgruntled position, but brought her eyes
over her shoulders to land on her frightened fiancee. Somebody had to do
something. Maybe she should....
"Noooooooo!" Ranma's unexpected yell gave everybody a jolt. Akane
narrowed her eyes and balled her hands into fists. She was about to strike
at him but noticed how his chest was heaving. He couldn't have been
answering her thoughts, so perhaps he was protesting something else.
Ranma pointed his index finger at his father. "Pop, you said it was only
a dream! 'There's nothing to worry about,' you said!"
Mr. Saotome tried to keep calm and forced his jowls into a rudimentary
smile. {{Don't look at me. I'm just an overgrown panda.}}
Soun Tendo put his hands up. "Calm down, son. There's no need to panic."
Ranma threw his hands in the air. "No need to panic? No need to panic?
I just knew something like this would happen!"
Soun glanced at his old friend, Genma, who was trembling and holding the
same sign. He returned his attention to Ranma. Nabiki spoke before her
father could, "What are you talking about, Ranma?"
Ranma also eyed his black-and-white-furred dad but only saw the sign. He
let out a sigh of release and calmed down. "I've been having these wierd
dreams about the Jusenkyo police coming after me and Pop again. I'm
sitting at this table and all of the sudden, Kenny breaks down the walls
and tries to drag us back to China to be judged."
A dull violin wafts through the air and a soft drumbeat accompanies to
darken the boy's tale. "He has me, Pop, Ryoga, and Shampoo tied to a pole,
and he's holding us over a pot of boiling water." Everybody at the table
leans a little closer as the tension mounts in Ranma's voice.
The music became louder and his tone became more resonant. "There's
nothing we can do. He justs laughs at us..." The horid melody started to
reach its peak and his face glowed with excitement.
"And taunts us over.... AHW, POP, COULD YA CUT THAT OUT! YOUR GIVIN ME A
HEADACHE!!!"
Everyone turned to see his pop hoding a violin and Mr. Tendo positioned
over a set of bongos, each frozen in his next note. They both stared at
their audience with striken faces and smiled. Everyone at the table folded
their arms and furrowed their eyebrows. The two musicians slumped down and
let their heads fall in defeat.
All eyes turned back to Ranma.
Nabiki placed both elbows on the table. "So, Ranma, you're getting all
worked up because you had some dream about a musclebound creep with a
sword--really." She rolled her eyes and feined disinterest.
"Yeah, Ranma! Getting us worked up over nothing!" Akane fumed, and
Kasumi could see that she was really genuinely worried about him.
Meanwhile, the okonomiyaki chef stared with wide-eyed bewilderment,
wondering what was going on that switched the topic from her helping a
priest to Ranma having a bad dream and what this had to do with anything.
Mr. Tendo was back at his own seat listening with his eyes closed in
thought. "Hold on, Akane. I would not dismiss an omen such as that so
lightly. Now Ukyou, could you describe the visitor once more?"
She blinked a few times before she spoke, wondering if the conversation
had really led back to her. She then relayed all her observations about
the plain and meek, Mr.Rogers 'We Must Respect The Trees' type person, but
she left out the part about wanting to take a spatula and have him neutered.
Now Akane looked disturbed. She muttered to herself, "So he is back."
Kasumi whispered her always unassuring "Oh my." Soun simply nodded. The
panda in the corner broke out with another flurry of signs; when he noticed
that he was still being ignored, he grawlfed and slumped his head in defeat.
The okonomiyaki chef cocked an eye to the table's occupants--but
ultimately on her should-be fiancee. "Excuse me, but could anyone please
tell me what's going on?"
"The Cult of the Muscle Sword." Nabiki leaned back and glanced at her
watch as if she were getting bored. "And it was about time Ranma got us
into some kind of trouble. It's been too quiet the past couple of days."
Akane was about to chastise her sister for being ever calm, but instead
added, "Believe me, Ukyou, you don't want to run into him."
"Are you sure he's that dangerous? He didn't look that strong. He was
shorter than Akane."
Ranma stretched his arms behind his back. "He'd be more than twice Pop's
size if there was some hot water around."
Ukyou continued her confused blinking.
Everybody instinctively looked at Soun (He always says something at this
point, doesn't he?). "Hmmm. It would seem clear to me that it is not safe
to walk the streets tonight. Ukyou, you are welcome to stay here for the
night."
"What?!?" Akane jumped up and her face twisted with absudity at the
though of being in the same house with that... that...
Ranma's face lit up. His mouth was starting to work faster than his mind
(again). "Hey, that's a great idea! Me and Ucchan'll have time to patch
things up between us!"
"Ran-ma!" Ranma turned and flinched as Akane's bright blue battle aura
flared up.
Just as the hopelessly-violent girl placed her hands around the biggest
dimensional hammer she could find, Ukyou rose from the table. "I really
have to get back to my place. I think I left some okonomiyaki on the stove."
Akane released her grasp and pulled her hands out of hyperspace as she
watched Ukyou trudge for the door. Ranma glared at Akane and stated, "Just
because you're jealous doesn't mean you have to take it out on her." Then
he rushed up to the departing girl. "Ucchan, wait!"
Akane's face slowly molded into a scowl. "Jealous? Jealous! Why would I
be...." _If he calls her Ucchan one more time...._(And while Akane blows a
gasket, lets check on Ranma.)
Ranma had followed Ukyou to the door; she held it open, ready to go.
"Wait. Ucchan. You can't go out there with Kenny walking around."
"Why not? In case you haven't noticed... Ukyou doesn't change when she
gets wet!" At that point, Akane ran up and splashed her fiancee with a
bucketful of cold water while Ukyou stepped to one side. Ranma scowled at
her under soaked, red hair, but she didn't feel like dealing with her yet.
Ranma caught up to Ukyou just as she stepped off of the porch and a rumble
of thunder clashed through the dark sky. Ranma's now high-pitched voice
pleaded, "Uc.. Ukyou. Please stay. It's gonna start raining. You heard
the thunder--and Kuno's nowhere around."
She stopped and slowly turned to her feminine/masculine friend. "I really
shouldn't stay. If Akane is still...."
Just then, a flash of lightning momentarily saturated the sky and she saw
a rather large sword-wielding shadow perched on the top of the house.
Thunder crashed and Ukyou was instantly hiding in Ranma's arms.
"Ukyou, what're you doing?" Ranma looked at Ukyou's striken face, then
shifted her gaze back to the house. A thin but prominent blue silhouetted
the form of Akane, then he heard, "Don't let me interupt your little
reunion!" and the door quickly slid shut.
Ranma threw his stare toward the street, realizing someone was there.
Outside the open gate, an old woman and her dog stared back in saucer-eyed,
frozen awe. Ranma returned his gaze to the woman in his arms, and the two
realized what they must look like. They each simultaneously shot the two
passers a goofy-looking smile and Ukyou jumped down.
The old woman and dog, still unblinking, glanced toward the roof, then
bulleted down the street in a blur of legs.
Both blushing friends stared at each other in confusion, then jumped away
from each other as a giant scimitar (measuring both their hights combined)
plunged into the earth between them; they screamed in unison.
* * * *
"Akane. That wasn't very nice." Soun gave Akane one of those
now-that-isn't-how-I-raised-you-to-act-now-is-it looks. Nabiki casually
added for fun, "Especially to your fiance."
Akane was about to throw another fit when she saw her father's eyes. With
a sigh, she changed her mood back to neutral. "You're right, Dad, I'm sorry."
"Now why don't you open the door and let Ranma and Ukyou back in. It's
going to start raining any second."
Akane sighed and pushed the door back open. "AAAAAAIIIIEEE!!!!" The
short-tempered girl was knocked to the floor as two pairs of feet almost
trampled over her. The two runners swiftly returned and slammed the door
shut, then leaned against the wall with chests heaving.
"Ran-ma! What are you and Ukyou doing?!"
They didn't look at her, but seemed to stare into nothing. The
crimson-haired girl gasped, "He's out there."
Soun stepped forward. "You mean HE's here?" Mr. Panda trembled, {{I
hope you've recently renewed your insurance}}.
Akane jumped up and pushed open the door. Ranma and Ukyou stepped back
from the wall. "Don't be rediculous, Ranma, there's nothing out here."
She walked out on the porch to make sure she assumed correctly, then
turned toward her family. "You're just imagining things."
With the speed of an arrow, the mammoth blade plunged noiselessly into the
wood and soil immediately behind Akane with a slicing sound and sunk itself
far enough so that the hilt reached the back of her head and the crossbar
rested on her crown. Akane just stood there, and everyone was quiet. With
the next crack of thunder, Akane's shorts fell to her ankles. When the
lightning struck, she fell forward onto the floor.
"AKANE!!!"
* * * *
"Ranma. Nabiki. I think she's coming around." Akane groaned miserably
and blinked her eyes as if coming out of a dark cave into sunlight. Her
head hurt.
Ranma, Nabiki, and Kasumi were standing beside her bed. "What happened,"
Akane managed to say, although the words came out in mumbles and they were
hard to understand. She brought a tired arm up to her forehead and groaned
again.
Kasumi offered in a worried tone, "A sword hit the ground behind you and
you hit your head."
Nabiki crossed her arms. "Not only that, but it split the back of your
clothes all the way down." Her matter-of-fact attidude annoyed Ranma, but
he didn't say anything.
"The blade left a faint mark down your back, Akane. Luckily, it didn't
cut you anywhere." Kasumi had her hand to her mouth in usual worried fashion.
Ranma hovered over her bed and the other two backed off slightly. "Are
you Ok, Akane?"
The dark-haired patient found it difficult to put her arm back down and
fought back a brief surge of pain that followed. "I'm fine. What about...."
"Pop and Ukyou are watching the house." Ranma noticed the way she dizzily
tried to keep her head still. "Are you sure you're alright, Akane?"
She waved her arm limply in her direction. "I'll be fine. Just need...
to rest."
Kasumi placed her hand on Ranma's shoulder. "We should let her get some
sleep now. We can have Dr. Tofu look at her in the morning."
Ranma nodded and the three left the room.
* * * *
Ukyou and Genma could find no one prowling around the house--or the
streets for that matter. It had been raining steadily with ocassional
bouts of thunder and lightning, odd weather for the time of year, but then
things were always odd where Nerima was concerned. A soaked okonomiyaki
chef circled the house one more time, carrying her battle spatula over her
head in a futile effort to keep herself dry, then met up with Mr. Panda in
the front yard.
_Why can't they just call the police? But noooooooooo--Mr. Tendo and Mr.
Saotome say it's a matter of pride and honor to defend the dojo. Well, I
suppose they're used to it. And I'm not one of their students._
She still didn't feel easy around Ranma's dad, one half of her deeply
sorry for trying to kill his son and the other half longing to see him
roasted over an open fire for leaving her so long ago. She could plainly
see that he felt uneasy around her as well--though it's doubtful he wanted
to see her dead.
Ukyou shook her head at the hulking animal and he nodded back. Then they
returned to the house.
[ A sad violin starts accenting the bleak standing of events ]
They cut around the mamoth blade still protruding from the ground and
entered. The livingroom was empty, so maybe they were all still up... no
wait, there's Soun playing the violin.
He kept a flawless tune and groaned pitifully under his breath, "This is a
sad day in the Tendo household." Of couse, he was overreacting.
Genma's old friend continued his lamenting as the two dripping fighters
went upstairs.
Upon reaching the top, they saw Ranma-chan leaning drearily on Akane's
door, almost hiding her head under her patch of red hair. Genma looked at
his son/daughter to ask her if Akane was alright. Ranma nodded but didn't
look up. The panda nodded likewise and started back down the stairs.
Ukyou walked up to the quiet girl and looked at her curiously. "You're
really worried about her, aren't you?"
"...." As usual, Ranma couldn't speak his/her true feelings, although it
was apparent in her mood.
Ukyou could see this, but was unsure how to react. "Why didn't her father
stay up here with her?"
Her eyes still watched the floor. "Aw, he passed out when he saw Akane
with no pants on. You'd think he's never seen his own daughter before."
_Sarcasm. That's good._ After a brief silence, Ranma asked, "Did you
find anything?"
"No."
To answer the next question she was afraid to ask, she assured, "Akane
will be fine in the morning."
Ukyou let a smile show.
* * * *
Ranma-chan and a damp Ukyou walked around the house, not doing anything in
particular. Ranma didn't feel like talking. Ukyou understood. _It isn't
just Akane. He was also worried about that Kenny guy._
When Genma walked out of the bathroom, nice and steamy and in human form,
Ranma unexpectedly put a delicate hand on Ukyou's shoulder. "You better
get out of those wet clothes before you make yourself sick. Ask Pop to
give you some of my stuff." She continued her moping about the house.
Ukyou looked around. _I guess this means I have to take a bath. I am
pretty drenched._
Just then, Genma appeared wordlessly beside her holding a small stack of
folded clothes. Ukyou almost jumped, but then stared at them for a while
and taking them.
* * * *
Ranma stood on the backyard porch and watched as thousands of tiny
raindrops assaulted the shadowy pond in thousands of miniature explosions.
_Why do I feel so depressed? What did I do to make myself feel this way?_
She shifted her gaze up into the abnormally dark sky. _Or a better
question: what had I not done? Akane was almost skewered today. I
should've been by her side in case.... I mean, in the past I've always
protected her. But I almost...._ Something left her feeling like a failure.
_And why can't Akane leave Ukyou alone? Why does she have to be so
jeal.... Doesn't that tomboy realize how much I l... care for her?_
Ranma started at the floor, clasping her hands behind her damp Chinese
shirt. _Ukyou's my friend, no matter what she's tried to do to me. I need
to let her know.... Why am I being so damn introspective all of the
sudden?_ (HINT: Author's whim)
Like a reflex, Ranma started walking to find someone to talk to. A fash
of lightning outside revealed a man-sized shadow that jumped into view and
crouched onto the wall beyond the pool.
* * * *
Ukyou couldn't remember when she had had such a soothing bath. Back at
her restaurant, which also served as her home, all the hot water was
usually used up with washing dishes by the time she got around to cleaning
herself. _I'll definitely have to save up for a decent waterheater._
She laid back and let the warmth saturate every pore of her body,
ocassionally dunking her head underwater to better soak her long, dark
hair. Her visit had been very nerve-racking and confusing. The priest
disappearing; Ranma acting as if she'd never tried to kill him in his life;
Almost getting eviscerated by an overgrow ginzu knife; Ranma's dad is a
panda? _My Ranchan really does have an interesting life. But then... I
suppose he's not mine anymore.... *sigh*_
She was about to shed a tear--no one was looking--when she heard a knock
and the door slid open. She saw a trim figure standing in the lighted
hallway through the mist. "Can I come in?" asked an all-to-familiar, yet
strangely withdrawn feminine voice. _Now this is REALLY confusing!_
Ukyou nodded dumbly and Ranma-chan took it as an affirmative. Ranma could
have waited until she got through with her bath, but something inside
him/her wouldn't allow this to wait. She had to talk to someone.
Ukyou almost freaked when the readhead stepped up, discarded her clothing,
and slipped into the warm water opposite her. The naked okonomiyaki chef
pulled her legs closer to her body and backed into the rim of the tub so
their skin wouldn't touch. The steam rose around Ranma like magic, and
soon, she was a boy again.
Ranma's face showed no embarrassment. He'd seen himself naked as a girl
before. He'd seen *gulp* Akane naked before--just before she sent him to
la-la land. What was the big deal? He'd even been in the same tub with
Ryouga when they needed to talk (NOTE: Though Ryouga's not a girl, I'm
trying to infer that he's taken a bath with a friend.).
"Ucchan, I... I...." He glanced down at the water. "I need to talk to
someone, and... and..." He stared to step out of the tub. "Oh, why am I
even here?" (HINT: Because Happousai is the co-athor.)
"Ranchan, wait...." She held out an arm and Ranma stopped. "I'm glad you
feel you can trust me. What do you want to talk about?"
While Ranma fumbled around for a beginning of his story, the small,
wrinkled form of Happousai looked into the window on passing to get out of
the rain. (NOTE: I told you he was co-author.)
* * * *
Cologne sat atop her staff in front of the open door of the Neko Hanten
and looked out into the rain. Something was about to happen. She could
smell it. But nothing was certain yet.
"What wrong, Great-grandmother?" Shampoo walked up behind Cologne with a
broom she had been sweeping with.
"I'm not sure kitten, but I'm sure we'll find out soon enough."
Shampoo shrugged and went back to sweeping. (CUTE VOICE: At least Shamoo
have cameo.)
* * * *
A loud crash of thunder forced Akane to jump awake. "Ow." She sank back
down in the pillow. Her head still hurt. She didn't have Ranma's amazing
recooperation factor, to her dismay. She only vaguely remembered what the
other's had told her about what happened. What she did know at the moment
was that she was thirsty.
She really didn't feel like yelling for someone's attention. Why bother
anyone anyway? She was strong enough. Her head felt better, or so she
told herself.
She pushed herself up on her arms. The dizziness faded quickly. She
shook her arms and legs a bit to see if she was hurt somewhere else, but
she seemed to be in good condition.
Akane threw back the covers and plopped her bare feet onto the floor. She
looked down at herself and saw the moonlight accenting her flesh through
the darkness. _Great. Where are my clothes?_ Atop her dresser was a heap
of torn fabric, but that couldn't have been what she put on that
morning--could it. Looking around, she saw a light blue robe hanging over
a chair. _Thanks, Kasumi. Always there for me._
She staggered a few steps until her head was relatively clear. _Just a
bit sleepy._ She threw the garment around her shoulders and tied the sash
as she would her martial arts gi, then started for the hall.
When she entered new light, she had to place a hand on the wall to steady
herself. At that point, Kasumi poked her head out of her room. "Oh my,
Akane, you shouldn't be out of bed."
"I'll be fine, Kasumi. I'm just going to get something to drink."
The worried sibling stared for a moment and blinked her eyes. If Akane
said she'd do it herself, there was little point in offering. "Be careful."
Akane walked down the hall and down the stairs. She was making her way to
the kitchen when she heard a light scratching sound coming from the door.
She gave no thought that it might be an intruder and pulled it open.
Slumped down on the wooden floor in front of her was a thoroughly-soaked
black piglet. "P-chan?" It was still raining outside, although the
thunder and lightning had died down to nothing more than a rumble and flicker.
Akane bent down and picked him up. It looked like he had been running a
marathon. "Poor P-chan," she crooned. The pig gave a sigh of recognition.
Closing the door, she continued to the kitchen cradling her little friend
in her arms and tried to keep him warm.
* * * *
Half of her had always dreamed of getting this close to her Ranchan and
half of her wanted to run as far from the house as possible. However, the
more they talked, the more Ukyou felt at ease. Despite their suggestive
situation, Ranma seemed to take no notice of her body; as a matter of fact,
surpisingly enough, she wasn't admiring his figure either. As Ranma got
more into a talkative mode and she listened harder, everything else seemed
to vanish. She wished he was in the talkative mode more often.
He started with his childhood: "I'm sorry me and Pop left you so long ago.
I really had no idea you wanted to marry me, or for that matter, that you
were a girl. Pop never told me about the arrangement he and your dad made.
I thought you just really liked all the goofy things we used to do
together. Remember all those times we'd play in the rain and have races
through the mud? Or the jokes we'd play on the neighbors' kids? I always
liked being around you. But it wasn't until after Pop made me leave that I
realized how much I missed you.
"He never gave me your address so I could write or nothin. I guess he was
afraid I'd find out the truth. Anyway, who had time to write with all the
movin around we did. After one training mission, we'd move to a different
place and train some more."
He revised the next ten years, in which he and his father had practically
spanned all of Japan's main islands--and even a few smaller--as well as
China's coast. He described his first run-in with Ryouga, when his father
actually allowed them to stop for more than a month and he enrolled in a
boys' school, up to his training with his dad to his ill-fated trip to
Jusenkyo Springs, to their escape from the village of the Amazons, to his
first meeting with Akane.
He said he didn't like the idea of getting married against his will, but
Akane really wasn't that bad--in fact, he had wanted to be her closest
friend in both forms. In his descriptions of his adventures afterwards, he
didn't go into how he felt very much, although she could imagine herself in
the same situations, and the action was impressive. Ukyou was on the verge
of laughing and crying at once. (AUTHOR'S SUGGESTION: Try telling your
whole life story plus explain the whole first season of Ranma 1/2. Tell me
how long it takes you. I want to know.)
With a sigh, Ranma began with new emotion. "I've tried to be nice and act
friendly around Akane, but that tomboy just won't let anyone into her
personal life. Sure we tease and insult each other now and then, but
against people like Mikado, Kodachi, or Shampoo, I'm always there to help
her out; a few times I forget myself, like when she tried to take on the
Dojo Destroyer by herself, but I always end up helping her out. We make up
for those few fights, then we go back to the same old routine afterwards.
She makes herself so hard to reach at times that I can hardly stand her.
And that is the real reason I call her uncute. Most of the time, I think
she's really ....
His voice hesitated, then sank back into despair. "The point I'm trying
to make is, I guess, that ever since we met, we've been fighting over the
smallest mistakes, and I'm getting tired."
Ukyou was too choked up to talk. She never knew he felt all of
this--though he was reluctant to admit it. _But why now?_
Ranma placed a finger aside her cheek. "Ucchan. I don't know why I'm
telling you all of this, but I...."
Someone opened the door.
* * * *
"Is my little P-chan alright?" Akane tickled his belly with her finger,
but he was too hungry to give any sort of laughter. When she mentioned
food, though, he managed a squeak.
She went to the refridgerator and looked inside for a while. The pig
would have eaten a mac truck if it would fit into his mouth. She pulled
out a jar of applesauce and a bowl of tunafish. Both were fine by him.
She also pulled out some cold oatmeal. "I'll just warm it up for you in
the microwave," she offered. His eyes grew wide in horror, and as soon as
she removed the plastic from the bowl, he pounced on it and was determined
to finish every last bite.
Akane watched him wolf down the applesauce when she remembered why she
came down. She started back to the fridge when her ears picked up the very
faint drone of someone talking.
"C'mon, P-chan, wanna see who it is? The pig was happy to comply and they
both walked down the hall and to the bathroom door. She felt the back of
her head and began to feel dizzy again. P-chan squealed questionably.
Akane had to hold herself up with the door. She slipped and it slid open.
(CUTE VOICE: Boy-type Ranma and stupid spatula girl in big trouble now.)
The mist cleared a path for her to see two figures in the water. Her
heart fell like a rock when she realized they were Ranma and Ukyou. Her
battle aura started to flare up. She wanted to.... *sigh* What's the
use. She felt a tear swelling in her eye. "Baka," she said shrilly and
walked away. P-chan eyed Ranma's startled face and would have attacked had
hot water not been present.
* * * *
Ranma's world crashed as soon as he realized it was Akane watching
them--and as if that wasn't bad enough, Ryouga saw him to. Akane walked
off and he let his head fall. _Why do these things have to happen to me?
And why am I in here, in the water, with Ukyou, anyway? And why...
do...I...always...have to...hurt...Akane?_
Ukyou watched as Ranma turned pale and began to shiver. His body slumped
forward and his breathing seemed to stop. Worried, she reached for him
with her tender touch, but he drew back with her every advancement. She
didn't know what to do. What was happening? Something was wrong about the
whole series of events, but she couldn't tell what?
She quickly shifted forward and grabbed his shoulders demandingly, forcing
Ranma to rest his head on her shoulder. The next thing she felt were his
fingers digging into the base of her neck, and then, a tear fell down her
back.
* * * *
Happousai had still been watching the awkward scene, tears starting to
form in his own moon-shaped eyes, when a slender hand pulled him down by
the collar of his shirt.
The next thing he knew, he was on the ground in a rainpuddle. Happy
pushed himself up and stared at the sleek shadow trying to disguise itself
by moonlight. "That was a mean thing to do to poor Akane," he squeeked.
A raspy feminine voice said playfully, "I would have thought you'd enjoy
watching Ranma get his."
The little man narrowed his eyes. "You still hurt Akane. For that, I
should...."
A pointed finger struck out. "You'll do nothing, old man! Do not
interfere!" With that, the figure departed over the wall.
The rain was still falling in a steady sheet and Happousai was getting
soaked. He didn't care. All he could do was shake his head. "Why did she
have to do that?"
* * * *
"You just couldn't resist, could you?" asked a low, grated voice.
Three dark shadows were perched side-be-side atop a high wall at the park,
the first two wearing a long, nondescript, soaking robes. Had anyone seen
them, all they'd see were shadows in the dim light no matter where they
looked from. The rain had become a light shower, so it didn't bother the
trio much.
"It was fun." The raspy feminine voice was untoned, as if she knew she
had done something she shouldn't have. "The little pervert saw me."
The middle shadow growled, "I bet you couldn't resist that!"
The first shadow raised a hand. "It's OK. It's not like we can't deal
with him."
*Sigh*
* * * *
"Why did he have to do something like that, P-chan?" Akane held the
little, black piglet over her head. She was crying. He hated to see her
cry. "That pervert." P-chan nodded.
She was lying in bed with the covers drawn. There was a wet spot by her
pillow where the tears had fallen. Ryouga ran through the scene again and
again through his little piggy mind and scowled each time. _Ranma. You've
finally gone too far._
A knock came at the door and P-chan jumped into his little piggy battle
stance. "Go away," she said weakly, not sure whether she meant it or not.
"Akane? Is something wrong?" Kasumi. Leave it to her to be the first
one to help.
"I just had another fight with Ranma." Somehow that seemed far from the
truth.
"Oh. Is there something I can do?"
"No. You can go back to bed, Kasumi." _No one could do anything now._
"Alright. Goodnight, Akane. I hope you two make up." Another tear fell
to the pillow.
* * * *
Ukyou had never wanted to see him like this. He was standing in front of
the couch with his head hung low. Ukyou placed a friendly hand on his
shoulder, but he seemed to take no notice.
Ranma finally said, "You should get some sleep. I'll talk to Akane in the
morning." He didn't sound too assured.
She broke their contact after another long pause. "You can sleep in my
room. I feel like taking the couch." Ukyou started down the hall,
glancing back once to see if he'd be alright. She didn't know where his
room was, but she'd find it. (NOTE: It's upstairs!)
Just as Ranma fell back onto the couch, Soun and Genma sauntered in the
front door, quietly laughing with each other, remembering old times.
He backed up and heaved jovially, "What's wrong, Ranma my boy? Why so glum?"
"I'm just tired, Pop."
Soun came in with, "Don't worry son. Tomorrow's another day."
* * * *
OK, so I started off my fanfiction career on a gloomy note. I didn't
intend for it to turn out that way when I started. Don't worry. I'll
clear this up yet. So maybe it's not Takahashi. If you don't like it, you
can suck on a spatula. (You might even be able to get a date with Ukyou
like that.)
[ This has been a production for your viewing pleasure ]
I'll try to do better with my next story, but until then, you'll just have
to stick with me on this one. If not, I'll be forced to knock you over the
head, drag you down to the basement, and make you watch reruns of
Gilligan's Island until you puke.
[ Next come the amazingly long credits containing the cast of character
with real Hollywood actors' names that just don't seem to fit and the name
of my computer Mel who helped my write this and a listing of the underwear
sizes of the actresses because Happousai deemed it necessary ]
[ Finally there's a short preview of scenes from the next episode which I
haven't writen yet so I choose to fill it with nonsense to make it seem
like the closing of a popular television series. ]
[ A cute, little furball jumps up and down: "Happy Happy Happy ]