I just got some new Gunsmith Cats stuff! Let's celebrate!

NOTE TO THOSE WHO ASKED FOR THE FIRST TWO PARTS OF THIS FIC: Due
to some idiot, who I have killed, the first two parts were
deleted from my files before I could post them to the RAAC(or whatever).
Sorry. 

-The Emperor (Well, I'll be a possum on a gumbush!)


GUNSMITH CATS/DUKES OF HAZZARD
Life Isn't A Highway, It's A Dirt Road
Part Four
By Stephen Schlueter



     Rally had just finished fixing some minor troubles with the
car and was driving towards town. Meanwhile, just a few yards
away, Cooter was hauling Rosco's car out of the river. Rosco had
gone off with Enos. Cooter picked up the CB. "Breaker One!
Breaker One! I may be crazy but I ain't dumb! Crazy Cooter comin'
at ya. Any of you Dukes out there on the Hazzard Net, come back."

WAYLON JENNINGS: Meanwhile, the boys were heading into town to
          	 have a talk with ol' Boss Hogg.

     "This is Lost Sheep to Crazy C" said Luke "What's up?"

     "Well, those two ladies in the fancy car you told me about
was just here a minute ago and they got enough firepower in the
trunk of that thing to take on the Marines."

     "Why would anyone need that many guns?" asked Bo.
     "They must be professionals." said Luke.
     "Professional what?" asked Bo.
     "That's what we need to find out." said Luke. He picked up
the CB again "All right, Cooter, thanks for the info."

WAYLON JENNINGS: Now what Cooter forgot to tell them was that
          	 those two ladies were on there way to the
          	 Commissoner's Office, which was where the boys are
          	 headed and so is Rosco.

     Daisy and Uncle Jesse had gone into town to run several
errands that the boys were supposed to do but couldn't because
they were running from Rally and May.

WAYLON JENNINGS: Now what Uncle Jesse and Daisy don't know is
          	 that they're about to get stuck in a real hornet's
          	 nest when those two Chicago ladies show up. Looks like
          	 the Duke luck is the same as always.

     The General Lee pulled up in front of Boss's office in town.
Bo and Luke, knowing that Rosco and Enos weren't there, went
right inside.
     "Hey! Take a look at this!" said Bo looking at the huge file
on Rosco's desk "Looks like Boss has a whole file of false
charges on us. Luke flipped through the papers. "Hey! These are
all blank!" he said.

WAYLON JENNINGS: Uh-huh. Maybe those two city gals should have
          	 read that report after all. It wouldn't have taken
                 them as long as they think.

     "Look, Uncle Jesse!" said Daisy pointing across the town
square towards the General Lee.
     "Well, what in tarnation are those two doin' in Boss's
office" replied Uncle Jesse. 

WAYLON JENNINGS: Now Rosco was out getting a new patrol car. Boss
                 started buying cars in bulk for whenever the Dukes are
      	         involved, which is pretty often. Meanwhile, the Dukes 
           	 were about to get in real trouble, cause here come 
          	 those two city ladies.

     "Uh.. Luke." said Bo looking out the window "We'd better get
out of here pretty quick because those two ladies who shot at us
are coming this way."

WAYLON JENNINGS: Now di'n I just say that?

       The Dukes rushed out and climbed into the General Lee,
through the windows, as always. The General sped down the street
just seconds after the boys got into the car.

     "Hey!" shouted May "There they go!"
     "We can't lose them this time!" said Rally. She stepped on
the gas.

     The General Lee almost ran over Rosco's feet.
     "Oooh!" he shouted "It's those Duke boys. Time for some Hot
Pursuit! I love it! I love it!" He got into his car and followed
the General not noticing that Rally and May were right behind
him.
     "Enos, this here's your superior officer, Roshcoooo P.
Coltrane, you got your ears on? Come back. Enos, you dipstick!
Answer me!"

     "Yessir, sherrif. What can I do for you?"

     "Enos, those Dukes are heading down on Spruce Lane. So don't
just sit there go get 'em, you dipshtick! I'm gone."

     "Whatever you say, sherrif."

     "The boys seem to be attracting a lot of attention right
about now." said Jesse "C'mon we better find out what Rosco's up
to." Jesse and Daisy got into Jesse's pick-up and went after the
General.

WAYLON JENNINGS: Now, in case you were wondering, that's the
		 Dukes in front. And following them is Rosco. And
		 following him are those two Chicago ladies. And
		 behind them are Daisy and Jesse. And bringin' up the
		 rear is poor ol' Enos. 

     "Great." said Bo "Looks like we've got a lot of company
right about now."

     Jesse picked up the CB.
     "Sheperd to Lost Sheep. Shepard to Lost Sheep. You got your
ears on?"

     "This is Lost Sheep, Shepard. Come back." said Luke

     "You boys seem to be in a lot of trouble right about now.
You've got Rosco and Enos after you."

     "We kind of noticed that."

     "Now Rosco is right behind you but I'm following some fancy
blue car behind him."

     "Blue car?"

     "Yeah, looks like a late sixties Cobra with Illinois
plates."

     "Shoot..." grumbled Bo "It's those two ladies with the
guns."
     "Hey, you're the one who ran them off the road not me." said
Luke.
     
WAYLON JENNINGS: Now what Bo and Luke don't realize it that those
two ladies are bounty hunters and they don't know that the folder in the
county office was full of blank papers to get the bounty hunters to 
chase them. Looks like the Duke luck is still holding out as always. 

     "Jeez, Rally." whined May "This Sheriff is moving so slow!
We'll all be dead of old age if we stay behind him."
     "I know. I know." grumbled Rally "But I can't get past him
on this road."
     "Well then.. shoot out his tires."
     Rally thought about it for a moment and shrugged. 
     Why not?

     Rosco didn't hear the gun go off over the roar of the
combined engines. But he sure felt it when the bullet punched a
hole in his left rear tire causing the patrol car to lurch off
the road and into a tree.
     The other cars went right past him.
     "Gdooohh..." grumbled Rosco "Oh, I'm gonna get 'em for that!
They done scuffed my ve-hicle."

     "Well, that was easy enough!" said May cheerfully.
     "I just hope that guy didn't kill himself when he hit that
tree." said Rally.
     "Nah. He's probably one of those guys who crashes into
things all the time."
     "Whatever..." Just then Rally noticed the other cars
following her. "Oh great, now we've got three other guys
following us."
     "What is this a parade route?"
     "May, do you think you could get rid of our little tag along
friends... without killing them?"
     "Piece of cake!" May started going through her miniature
grenade collection in her jacket. "Let's see... These should slow
'em down!" May rolled down the window and tossed the grades
towards the following cars.

WAYLON JENNINGS: Now, I don't know much about explosives, but I'd
		 say those are gonna cause a lot of trouble.

TO BE CONTINUED...


 

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Emperor Stephen "The Mega Man" Schlueter
Leader Of The Legions Of The Crimson Empire
Master Of All Things Anime
Creator Of Ranma Theory
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